Best friends drawing

We never expected things go end up the way they did when I came back into your life. Everything changed so quickly, and I wasn't sure if it was okay to feel the way I felt towards you. My friends who knew me best warned me not to, I did it anyway and fell in love with you. even with all the red flags, it was that look you gave me on my birthday made me think there was a chance. I still wish we could have tried. But for now i think its better to push away those feelings. Maybe in time I'll be able to tell you how I feel.

It’s hard making decisions that’s best for you, but not too great for the other person. I know what I want to say and what to do, but HOW do I get passed this fear of confrontation. Of making someone upset.
The relationship I have with my friend is one sided unfortunately. They want to see me way more than I want to see them. I’ve made agreements with them that pretty much makes me see them 4-5 days out of the week, but that’s honestly not great for me at all. Most of the time I feel like a caretaker because they don’t have a car, no job, and I’m the closest person they have. It’s tiresome. I wanna distance myself so bad, but I’d feel bad if I do. We’ve been friends for like 8 years
TLDR, how do I get over making someone upset and just give it to them straight?

So I got this in my email today. My husband said it was spam and while I understand the beginning is very much on one side but at the end it gives good simple information on how to observe the process that is shaping our state. It’s possible I am also overthinking. Did anyone else read this?
Let’s dive right into June, shall we? The U.S. Department of Justice came to Louisville in May for community feedback on how to address a pattern of unconstitutional policing so the public can help craft reforms for the Louisville Metro Police Department. I attended one of the several meetings, and want to share the Findings Report with you if you haven’t already seen it. If you didn’t attend an in-person meeting, you can email [email protected] or leave a message at 844-920-1460 to share ideas at any time. They will also be able to provide you with more information about future events. We are approaching the one-year mark on June 24, 2022, when the Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade, declaring that the constitutional right to abortion, upheld for nearly a half-century, no longer exists. Kentucky voters rejected a ballot measure in November 2022 aimed at denying any constitutional protections for abortion. Despite a victory for abortion-rights advocates, the amendment’s defeat keeps a ban on abortion in place while a legal challenge is presently being considered by the state Supreme Court. I am committed to refiling bills to support and protect women’s health, and access to healthcare, while working with women on both sides of the aisle in both chambers who are also focused on addressing our poor maternal health outcomes in KY. We are now in the month of Pride which celebrates our LGBTQ community and acknowledges the struggles and history that got us here. June 28, 1969, marks the beginning of the Stonewall Uprising, a series of events between police and LGBTQ+ protesters that spanned over six days. The Stonewall Inn was one of the most popular gay bars in New York City. Throughout the state, it was illegal to serve alcohol to a gay person until 1966, and in 1969, homosexuality was still considered a criminal offense. It was not the first time police raided a gay bar, and it was not the first time LGBTQ+ people fought back, but the events that unfolded over the next six days fundamentally changed the nature of LGBTQ+ activism in the United States. If you are interested in attending an event or volunteering at an event, you have an extensive list of opportunities that our friends at the Fairness Campaign have listed here. Also, with the arrival of June and its vibrant greens and sunny warm days, the Office of Sustainability is excited to launch the Green Resources for Residents guidebook, a one-stop resource to help individuals and families save costs while going green! Residents can learn about financial incentives available through the Inflation Reduction Act, Louisville Metro Government, Louisville Gas and Electric, and more. June also kicks off the interim committee meetings for 2023. The Regular Session ended March 30th, and after a short break, lawmakers return to Frankfort for the interim, which is the time we are not only in meetings but also working on legislation we want to file when we go back into session in January 2024. Every committee I serve on (Agriculture, VMAPP, Small Business and IT, Local Government) turns into a joint committee, meaning the Senate and House standing committees are combined. I enjoy the opportunity for everyone to be in the same room for a more extensive conversation since during the session our committees are separate. Likewise, any task forces, statutory and special committees will also meet during the interim period. I am also thrilled to be serving on the Health & Human Services Delivery System task force. There are so many important services that run through this cabinet, and we need to find ways to improve the structure of how supports and services are delivered so Kentuckians have their needs met in a timely manner. I believe in transparency and civic participation, and want you to know how to engage in the legislative process. The comprehensive 2023 interim calendar is available on the official Kentucky General Assembly website. Please note, the fluid nature of our work means the calendar may be subject to change. While many of our interim joint, statutory, and special committee meetings are held in our historic Capitol Annex building in Frankfort, I understand not everyone can be there in person. However, in this digital age, distance is no obstacle to democracy. Kentucky Educational Television (KET) and the Legislative Research Commission will be providing a livestream of the committee meetings, ensuring you can participate remotely. The legislative calendar will be refreshed weekly with information about upcoming committee meetings to keep you updated. Furthermore, you can find more information about each interim joint, statutory, or special committee on their web pages. We are only as strong as our willingness to engage; which looks like staying informed, involved, and committed to positive change for all, particularly those who are vulnerable. We have a responsibility to each other and the common good. Let’s be each other's best partner and advocate in this journey; even when we might not always agree, I promise I will always be open to an honest conversation. If you have any comments, questions, or concerns, email me at [email protected]. You can also call my office at 502-564-8100, where an operator will happily connect you to my assistant Jake. For assistance en Español call 1-866-840-6574. Those with hearing impairments can use the Kentucky Relay Service at 711. You can also follow me on Facebook, Twitter, and instagram (It may be necessary to cut and paste the above URL if the line is broken) or send a blank email to leave-2[email protected]

Married woman with no time for a social life and feeling a bit isolated and lonely - so I’m looking for a friend. Someone to chat with occasionally and make me feel like I have someone keeping me company.
I’m technically ghost free, but I’m also an introvert and need some recharge time. (My job is very socially and emotionally demanding) Please don’t be offended if you don’t get an instant response.
I love concerts, going to the movies, visiting museums of all kinds, traveling to places and finding the most unique restaurant to give a try. I’m all about experiences! And I haven’t had much time for that lately so that’s definitely partially why I’m feeling off.
Tell me about your favorite museum or the best concert you’ve ever been to :)

For brevities sake, I will try to get straight to the point but this will be long. To any one that makes it to the end, thank you in advance. If you want to skip to the last five paragraphs you will get the jist of what I am trying to say. I am trying to avoid getting put on probation for disciplinary actions, but they won't be clear with what I have done wrong.
​
I'm low man on the totem pole for a big company. A big one, that some might say is too big to fail. What I can say that it is in sales. My issue stems from the fact that I'm just not comfortable enough to chit chat with managers about the topics they want to talk about, which are either inappropriate, distracting me from work, or super personal. I've felt like they've wanted me gone for a minute, but I just don't fit in so I mind my business and do my job to the best of my ability.
Recently I was threatened to be put in a program to correct behaviors they don't like, but Im not officially on this probation. When I asked what the issue was they said certain team members feel I'm not approachable and or they don't like how I walk away when certain managers come over. While I believe I am operating within the rules of engagement, given that their topics make me uncomfortable and Ive chosen not to formally file any complaints, yet.
Here are a couple true examples of why I don't like to chit chat with the managers at work:
Manager 1: Likes to sneak up on you and talk about their sexual escapades they had over the weekend. I personally am not comfortable with this type of conversation at work and when they trap my in a conversation I freeze and draw blanks. I come off as cold because my appearance is intimidating, but I'm truly so uncomfortable I just freeze. When I try to probe and get to know them, the get turned off if I ask them the wrong question. I asked a manager if they watched a certain show and they got upset, said no, and ended the conversation. This same manager is high ranking, and will open a conversation talking about getting caught performing fellatio on a beach in Mexico. This was a true interaction and I wasn't interested.
Manager 2: Likes to take every opportunity to talk about themselves and their plans for vacation, but has literally cost me sales and reprimanded me for it later. This person is very touchy feely, and will subtly force you to shake their hand. I always shake for fear of retaliation but this manager will literally throw you under the bus if you treat them like they aren't a god. This manager will have me do things their way when we were trained to do it another way but the inconsistency causes friction between the rest of the team and I pay the price for that when this manager isn't around.
Manager 3: Very nice and very sweet, but they won't have my back about certain instances for fear of being on the outs with the other managers. But when we are alone, they tend agree with me. This person is new and I care for them but they allow the more tenured managers to gaslight me about any issue I bring up. I still truly care for this person, and don't want them to risk their future when I am just an associate so I just deal with it.
Manager 4: The same as manager 3, but not as nice. And we don't have the rapport for me to really go to them about my problems. They were on leave for a while and came back happy to see me, [they asked first] then gave me a hug, but before the day was over they wouldn't even look at me.
Manager 5: This manager does this weird thing where they ask you how you're doing, ask you something you're passionate about, and then they walk away... Literally just like that. I am getting reprimanded for not being open enough to conform to the culture of the company, but every time this manager asks me how my fishing is going, or if I was gaming last night, in the middle of my response they walk and it hurts every single time. They do this to everyone.
Manager 6: Replaced the manager that hired me and ultimately just won't ever let me plead my case. This manager is a nice person, but I understand this person cares more about appeasing the other managers versus actually getting to the root of the issue. Truly a nice person though, I won't take that away from them.
Manager 7: The big boss. I rarely see this person. They usually don't talk to me unless we cross paths, but for the most part they try to not even look my way. It really sucks because I feel me and this person have the most in common of all the managers. They know what's going on, but they stay out of it. I find this hard to respect none the less.
I know I'm writing a lot but I promise I am leaving a lot of relevant info out. I constantly get praise for holding myself accountable at work, the same people tell me I need to hold myself accountable when it comes to the friction between me and my coworkers. The issue is, I get along pretty well with many of them, and the others I don't chat with, we just don't chat but not for any particular reason. That's just how life works. I also took it upon myself to meet everyone, I learned about 40 names my first week out of over 100 employees and out of no where, the whole store stopped talking to me. I really don't know what I did, and it was too obvious to not feel it was orchestrated behind closed doors, but of course they will never admit to this. They try to make it seem like its the whole store, but I know the people I don't get along with; leadership just won't tell me.
In my meeting today, two managers threatened to put me on a probation of sorts and the focus would be coworker rapport. My sales metrics are trash this quarter but they told me they weren't worried about that. They told me it would last two months, and every week we would go over that week and I would be graded. They said the issues that warranted this meeting were because I walk away when I see managers coming, I have team members that aren't comfortable talking to me, and they were upset because I had an incident where a manager where I refused to shake his hand. If you read the descriptions about the managers above, I feel like most would understand.
I won't parade around like I am innocent, but I don't go out of my way to bother anyone, and I do everything they ask me to do. So I am not insubordinate. Here are the things I know I've done wrong recently, and or things I feel I could have handled better:
--I have been tardy for work maybe three times the past couple of weeks, and I've left early from feeling ill. I don't have a rep for either of these things but I've been stressed out over a recent move and am just falling into a new routine, but I am back on track.
--When I arrive, I go into the break room to clock in and I go straight to the floor. I don't mingle in the back because the managers and their buddies literally stop talking when I come around. I am so uncomfortable I just need to get out of that room. I literally have days where a person I had a good conversation with the day before won't even acknowledge me in the break room because the managers or leads are around. It kinda hurts my feelings, so to keep myself in good spirits to start my shift, I go in the back, and jump right on the sales floor. I know I could afford to play the games they play, but I'm just not built like that. I don't even feel welcomed to eat lunch in the break room. For the past 10 months I sit alone in my car on break.
--I am quiet when I am not around the coworkers I trust. Certain team members have really betrayed me, and don't know that I know that they take everything I tell them to a manager and they talk about it in the breakroom. It's so predictable that I only tell them stuff I want everyone to know. I find it serves my mental health and my ability to sell stuff better to keep conversations with these coworkers superficial and light hearted or avoid them all together but they will literally go tell on me if I don't tell them personal stuff about my life.
--I am a bit short with a particular manager, but never what I would deem disrespectful. I know I should just suck it up and play the game, but this manager makes my days hell at work, does stuff to spite me, and hurts my sales as a result of their inadequacies. They are the manager of sales, and can provide no support or advice to help me as a sales person. I honestly feel alone and lost when they are on they floor, and when I give feedback I get their response "well this is how I do it'. Manager number 2 if you didn't guess already. The other managers won't accept that I've already done everything they've asked me to do as far attempting to connect with everyone.
When I was talking to the managers today, a situation that happened a couple of days ago came up and I quickly realized the scenario was the catalyst for this awkward meeting. My boss singled me out and asked me to do something that would jeopardize my relationship with the other team members but I prepared myself to do it anyway. The following shift, I went home sick and on my way out he tried to give me a high five but I just couldn't bring myself to comply because I had had enough. I told him "no more dap, handshakes, or anything like that; especially after what you did the other night.".
I know I could have handled that differently, but that was the point they chose to take action. They brought up older scenarios that I have already mentioned but they failed to address those situations when they happened. They told me that certain people feel a way about me, but they won't say who. I am entitled to zero due process apparently. Not once did they mention my terrible sales numbers. They have plenty of ammo to use if they wanted a formal and documented meeting, but they only ever come to me when someone who I don't know has their feelings hurt.
I was writing a letter to [redacted] support because our HR isn't truly an HR and they are in the clique of spies utilized by the managers. I figured I would ask the reddit community first what they would do, because this site has really saved my life. I had two weeks of bliss at this job, then the team wouldn't even look at me. It almost brought me to tears many times, but I stuck it out and just grew closer to the people that accepted me when it wasn't cool to stand next to me. Now all of a sudden, I am at risk of being terminated because I refused to fist bump a manager, when truthfully there are other mistakes I've made that they don't even bring up. So I know they are building a case against me and it's fucked up because I gave my all to this company.
What should I do? I am definitely going to apply for new jobs, but I can't just keep running from my problems and starting over in a new place hoping for a change. I need to make a fundamental change in my behavior, or I need to swallow my pride and suck up to the bosses but they constantly move the goal post so I really can't make any progress even if I wanted to. I am fearful of retaliation if I go above the store manager because the regional manager knows what's going on. I am also afraid of retaliation if manager number 2 holds for a fist bump again and I refuse. I am not ready to leave until I hit my sales goals. I owe myself that much.
This company is slick, and if I make the wrong move they will bring up my tardies and other fireable offenses but I have really tried to be an exemplary employee thus far and my team agrees. I will be under the microscope and eventually on probation. Please help, I know quitting is the move, but I gotta change some things before that happens. I knew this was coming, because the behaviors are so predictable, but my journal has but only two entries. I am not the vengeful type, but I don't believe in bullying not matter how passive.
​
Thank you,
Your neighborhood, friendly dread head.

I can’t believe i’m even making this post My (21F) best friend(i’ll call her beth) (22F) moved in with me back in February
Everything has been going great, but when we established house rules, Beth asked if there was a bug in the house, not to kill it if she is home and she will come get it and take it outside
i didn’t mind because that’s less bugs I need to deal with, and I know how much of a hippie type of girl she is and she never killed bugs in her own apartment. the situation only happened once where she let a stink bug outside.
a week ago there was a pretty big spider in my bathroom while I was in the shower and I took my book and squished it, but I freaked out and screamed and it caused beth to run to the bathroom to ask what’s wrong
I said just a spider, and told Beth she could come in. She grabbed a tissue and asked where it was so she could let it outside, I pointed at the smooshed spider on the wall and literal tears filled beth’s eyes
I told her it was just a spider, and she starting rambling about how it’s still a life, and how i knew how much this meant to her and how it’s the only thing she asked from me. I told her I just freaked out and just reacted on instinct and reminded her that she is in the house I paid for, and if she has a problem with me killing bugs, she can leave or get over it
she just walked away and hasnt spoken to me much since, I tried speaking to her and she asked for an apology. I said i’m not apologizing for killing a spider and all she said was “it’s not about the spider” and i told her i didn’t have time for riddles and walked away
i’m really not sure what i did or how the situation even escalated to this
AITA?

Narc ‘friend’ I’ve slept with a couple of times stopped love bombing me and doesn’t really talk to me if we catch up. I think he discarded me because he tried to triangulate and make me jealous by bringing up other girls who were after him or checking him out (they weren’t) or bringing up his bumble app to swipe left on every girl (don’t know how that affects me). I didn’t let it affect me and just said ‘you should have gone for it’ or turned it into dirty talk when he eventually ‘settled’ for me that night when he was rejected as well and the next morning he said ‘you liked when I brought up that girl during didn’t you?’. He acted like he didn’t want to get with me last time until the last minute where he ‘changed his mind’.
He’s gone after my best friend though as his new supply and messages her a lot and wants to catch up. She finds him annoying and none of us like him so she left him to sit by himself on a night out and didn’t wish him happy birthday when he told her the day before it was his birthday to send a message. She’s strong and has it together not a typical narc supply and not putting up with his love bombing which is great to see.
I’ve tried to delete him after he was nasty to me on a night out and he wouldn’t let me and I’ve sent him a goodbye message and he said that ‘we were close friends with a good sexual relationship’ (he dirty talks and flirts and mentioned that we’d have sex again but never follows through or acts like he wants it so I gave up). I also had an argument about money he owed me and I didn’t want to see him again and he said he wanted to talk to me sober and wouldn’t return my money until he could ring me and chat when I called him a fake friend and didn’t want me to delete him.
I get monkey branching and cycling but if he seems done with me and doesn’t talk to me online or irl why’s he care if I delete him?

I was doing so well. I was told that I was past it. I said my goodbyes, and on my ride my home, our song came on. It was the first time I've heard it since we broke up. I was alone in the car, with all the windows down. The sun was shining and the temperature was perfect. I sang that song. Loud. I screamed the words. I smiled and laughed. I felt light. I felt like myself. Everything was done. It finally officially came to its close. I had reached the point I had been fighting to be at since he had broken up with me weeks prior. Then two months hits. And all of a sudden ten feet in front of me he stood. Brunette in a grey crewneck. We lock eyes. And now I'm back at the beginning. All that comes to my head is his arms around me, that one night, in the back of my car, when i first fell in love. Who knew someone could set you back so far, so quickly. I felt all the color leave my face, and I tried my best to ignore him, but I'm not sure it worked. I threw my arms around my best friend and laughed the moment off. That's all I could do. That was the test. I failed it. But once again there is nothing I can do but keep moving forward. I'm not going back on my goodbyes. They will remain. And I will continue on. The more I look back on the relarionship, the key word is irony. How ironic was it that i would date the boy my senior year that had hurt me my freshman year. How ironic was it that he would be the one that occupied my mind all four years of highschool. How ironic would it be that he broke my heart. That he was the first boy I loved. That he could do so much damage. That he could cause so much pain. Excuse my language, but stupid fucking brunette boys in grey get me every time. I hate that. Hopefully one day though I find the right kid, in the right grey tshirt. 

So here is my true and final goodbyes to him.

 I say my final goodbyes to that boy. The boy that hurt me. The boy who was able to teach me so much. The boy that allowed me to realize that the version of me that I was with him, is not who I am meant to be. He may have been a chapter in my story, but I will not let him be the whole book. So I wish him the best of luck, and nothing but happiness. This time I'm letting you in completely. I'm being genuine. I'm telling the truth. All things I could never do with him. Some irony I must say. 

So I finally did NC in December 2022. We were technically broken up in May 2022 but kept contact up until December.
But I still can't get him off my head, most of the time I feel like I might have done the wrong decision. I know some stuff he said and did was not correct but he also made me feel loved most of the time. I've never been close like that with anyone so he was like a best friend and we could tell each other anything. I've never felt like myself with anyone else and he never judged me and was always supportive and complimenting me. I've never had a close relationship with my close relative either so I don't know if its the reason why I can't stop thinking about it.
I live in a small town so I found out he had a girlfriend for a month but she dumped him since he was too controlling (from what I've heard it was because he didn't like that she had male coworkers and told her he didn't want her to be friends with men). It shows me he hasn't changed but I honestly don't know why I'm unable to move on and accept that he was often disrespectful

people don’t even give you a chance. whether it be friends or an actual relationship. society has really put good looks on a high level and if you’re not what society expects then don’t expect snything good to come your way. i have lived this and it fucking sucks. people barely give me the time of day. i try my best to make my appearance even decent but no matter what i do, it’s never enough and it doesn’t change. i don’t even get a chance. i really hate this. i hate who i am.

I"m just going to say it. If you had abuse young; like baby-toddler- infant young, then you may have never really felt personal freedom. Not in your body, not in your mind, never. Even young pre-verbal children know when what they're doing is upsetting a parent who can't cope either because of a mental defect, personality disorder, immaturity, or a combination of all those factors. And so even a young child will learn to adapt. Not cry, not ask for help, not reach for a parent, learn to be still-never experience true freedom. It's a survival mechanism that just kicks in. I suspect I did a lot of freezing, and dorsal vagal shutdown as a pre-verbal child-then throughout my life.
I'll be doing okay, processing feelings, and then I'll be terrified, like I should run for my life, or something terrible is going to happen. And I get very busy. But I know it's not about whatever I think it is that I have to do, I know it isn't'.
It's a very old, very strange feeling of being really unsafe-it's very old. It's a sense I have of never having been safe in my body.
As I'm healing and growing, whatever lingering issues, or unrecognized fears hanging out in my psyche, usually show up in my dreams. It usually involves my Mother, the person that is responsible for all of my trauma, CPTSD. I'll be dreaming about being with safe friends, and then suddenly my Mother calls, and someone tells me she's on her way over, and I panic, or I feel instant shame. Possibly shame by proxy which is that I'd be fine with someone and she'd either humiliate me, or embarrass me with her aggressive, destructive, crazy behavior for all the world to see. And I'd want to die.
I had this dialogue with my therapist, I said, "I'm afraid I'll be living my life and she's going to show up, and completely wreck my life". Of course she said, "that's never going to happen, if it does you call the police". Which felt so validating. But it's crazy, because I really had no idea I still carry that much fear in my body, and my mind. Imagine, 7 years of therapy, and everything else I do to stay informed, and I didn't know that I'm still afraid for my life, at times? It really made me aware of what I went through being around her for as long as I was.
My therapist said, "it's the trauma". And I thought about that all afternoon. I just wanted to say that , if I ever wasn't sure whether I had abuse, it's pretty clear now. Like zero confusion about what I experienced, because you can't be that afraid, that terrified for nothing. So it's one of those Catch 22's, where when I wasn't sure I experienced abuse , I could blame myself, and carry the burden of that, and then My Mother, was you know, not that bad. But now that this sense of danger and impending doom surfaces, it's so clear. So good that it wasn't me, Bad that she clearly traumatized me to the point of never having ever felt safe in my own life.
It's really perplexing that you can simultaneously feel the best you've ever felt, while being fully aware of why you're struggling and where all your fears stem from. It's the most confusing experience. Seeing that people can be great, while also waiting for the other shoe to drop all the time.
I was wondering about that. Hoping that someday I won't feel like this?

I've been really struggling these past few months. I lost my cat to FELV and watching her suffer the last couple weeks of her life killed me. She was only 3. She was my best friend and we went through a lot together during those 3 short years. Ever since I lost her, I've been fighting feelings I haven't felt in 7-8 years (last attempts). The last few days I've been really struggling with loneliness and I just kind of lost it. I wrote a letter for my loved ones, I messaged a few good friends that I care a lot about, and left for a spot I knew I could be alone and just be at piece with myself. I called my gf and left her a voicemail apologizing for what I was about to do. It's been a little rocky with her, but I love her to death. After I left the VM, I just sat there, for what felt like hours, crying. I was finally able to gather my thoughts, I told myself I couldn't do this to her. I couldn't do this to my cat, she would have wanted better for me. I am now back home, and I threw the pills I was planning to take in the dumpster. I'm proud of myself that I did that but I still feel so alone. I feel like if I would have went on with it, it would have hurt them, but now that I didn't do it, they will think less of me, not even care or just act as though I'm being over the top. I have struggled with depression for years and most of the time I can see the good in life. But when I can't, I seem too loose everything that matters to me, including myself. I'm really scared of myself right now but I'm trying my best to not do what I did last time. I try to tell myself there's a reason I didn't die last time but right now I cant see any good reasons. I just want the suffering to end.

Hello moms, I need your help/guidance. I have been with my husband for almost 8 years and married just over a year and am at a standstill.
We have a 4m old son together. I, unfortunately, lost my high paying remote job a couple weeks before our wedding date last year. I thought I’d be able to find work again quick bc I have my MBA but I got pregnant a few weeks after we got married and my first trimester was a nightmare to say the least so I haven’t worked since April 2022.
A few job opportunities fell through last minute for me so I didn’t work the entire time I was pregnant. My husband was never pleased with this, though I tried my best to keep up with all the household duties in return.
My husband works remotely as a software engineer and makes around $135k and we live in a rural part of AL, so you’d think finances wouldn’t really be a struggle for us. Technically it’s not, but I think a part of him felt used or taken for granted because I never found work even though I tried and have always been thankful and appreciative of him.
To make matters worse, the first few months our son was born he was not supportive. He barely helped me with our son. He said it wasn’t his responsibility and I think he felt detached bc if my son wasn’t sleeping or nursing he was crying. Which of course is typical of a newborn but my husband failed to really understand that. I would beg him to feed our son or hang out with him and he just wouldn’t.
Only recently we started going to couples counseling and he agreed he would start watching our son for 1 hour a day. He hasn’t done this consistently but at least does it maybe 4-5 times a week. The problem is once his hour is over he doesn’t think he has any more responsibilities with our son.
Today, my mother-in-law watched our son for a few hours and it was the first time since my son was born that my husband and I got alone time. That almost didn’t happen tho bc his friend is in town visiting and he wanted to hang with him instead. Priorities right? He did end up taking me out to a bar and grill type place for a drink and appetizer, which was nice I suppose. But after we picked up our son, he went to dinner and hung out with his friend, and he’s still doing that right now as I’ve tried for the last 2 hours to get our son to sleep.
Normally, I’m fine with him hanging with a friend, but it’s just frustrating living with someone who is supposed to be your spouse but chooses to hardly ever be around you. I understand him working til 4:30ish every weekday but after that he rarely spends time with us. I just don’t know if this is normal. It feels lonely honestly. All my family lives on the west coast so I’m really here alone just for him. I understand we are under the same roof everyday which can be tedious, but to be fair, his office is downstairs and I’m upstairs all day so there is a little bit of separation.
Even if we work on our relationship though, I can’t make my husband want to spend more time with me or our son. I just don’t know what to do. As a SAHM I feel stuck and don’t know if anything will actually ever change. I also don’t know if it’s normal for a spouse/new dad to be this way. Any help, advice or suggestions are welcomed. Thank you!

When I was fired, I was told "you can take your 'passion' to... other companies". I had asked for a raise and cited my performance and passion for the work as my reason. So this was his way of digging back at me for that. There are more things, but tension was building up to that point.
This week, I started an internship at a very big company. I wanted my old boss to know that my passion was in a much better place now, so here's the email I sent:

Good afternoon, ___,
Today, I started my internship at a top bank. They are paying me handsomely, double what I was getting paid before. They have a dedicated starbucks, a food market, a primary care facility and pharmacy, a gym with updated equipment and a basketball court, and, best of all, no fruit flies. They have multiple buildings with bridges to each, elevators and escalators, a dedicated lounge building with mini golf, cornhole and concerts on the roof, frozen lemonade, and more.
I would like to thank you for firing me. It's clear now that my passion was squandered at ___, and I'm glad to have found a company where it can flourish. Any production deficiencies must have been due to mismanagement or misinterpretation, since a company with much higher standards seems to appreciate me greatly. I was offered this internship in June 2022, and boy am I glad I didn't withdraw it when I started working for you.
Best of luck with your company in ___, ___

He was giving me shit the whole time I worked there. He would send emails that end in "or else I think we might have a problem...", and do things to try and humble me, and would get more frustrated when I showed him I was who I said I was (passionate, and good at my job). I called linux mint beginner-friendly in one of my interviews with him, and he flashed a very displeased face at me, then when I came in person, he told me to bring in my laptop because he had a "little surprise for me :)". it was a linux problem. I did it with some trouble because I don't work with systemd, but I did it.
Another time, i had to convert some old database files to new ones. There's a library, but it costs money. I told him I would do it from scratch. "I think it would be more cost effective to buy the license" meaning he didn't think I'd be able to do it. I sent him the converted files that day, and told him that it took a day for me to do it, so buying the license would waste a day as well as having to buy the license. I got no response.
I admit I might have a problem of rubbing it in when I prove people wrong, but I would also argue that people have a problem discrediting someone's ability. If they say they can do it, don't try to disprove & humiliate them. It makes some people very upset when they know someone wants to humiliate them, and they may just end up humiliating the other person in retaliation.

Basically, should I move in with my boyfriend??
Okay so I'm going to do my best at organizing this but my adhd has been rocky lately and my relationship and everything that entails is complicated.
SOooo my (31F) and my (37M) partner have been looking at houses together for over a year. We've been together for maybe two and a half years but our relationship has moved fast. We were both in the process of divorces from relationships that were ten plus years long. We bonded over that and other struggles we were facing that most couldn't understand. We both have two kids each from previous relationships. I currently have my kids 5 nights a week, he visits with his kids Fridays and Saturdays but is going to be transitioning to an overnight or two a week within a few months. We also have a 6 month old together.
When our relationship started, I basically started living with him. My husband wouldn't move out and didn't really want me to leave him, even though we had been separated trying to get divorced for over a year. So for the first year of my new relationship, I slept with him each night and during the day would take care of my kids until my husband got out of work (when they were in school I was with my boyfriend). My husband worked late so I normally was hanging out with my boyfriend all morning and while my kids were in school, then I'd pick the kids up and do my mom stuff (homework, playtime, dinner, bedtime) then my husband (now ex-husband) would get out of work and I'd leave and go back to my boyfriend's house and my husband would drop the kids off at school in the morning. We did this for almost a year and eventually my kids met my "friend" we did everything as slowly as things felt appropriate. Finally my husband was able to move out and we were able to go forward with our divorce and adapt a more appropriate custody situation. My boyfriend kept his apartment but started hanging out more and started sleeping over most nights as we had gotten quite use to sleeping with each other every night.
Fast forward a few more months, he still has his apartment but we pretty much just live at mine we spend all our time together (I'm currently a stay at home mom). We'd been together for about a year and a half, and I get pregnant. Like I said when I started this we're actively looking at houses together. We basically live on redfin and trulia. I get us a realtor. We go to about 6 or so showings over the course of a year. Mind you in all of this he's going through a messy divorce and custody battle, which is hard on both of us but it's more his story to tell. He deals with stress on a daily basis because of it. He's finally divorced but it wasn't easy and he's still fighting for more time with his kids. ANYWAY sooo we finally find a house that checks all our boxes. Enough space, in our kid's school districts, just basically perfect. So he pulls the trigger. I find out right before our realtor drafts the paperwork that I'm not going to be on the deed. OK. So like I mentioned he had a bad divorce, he's scared because of what she ended up taking from him. OK fine, even though when I move I'm bringing my kids and SOME security would be nice. (He doesn't want to get married and has expressed he NEVER wants to remarry and this was hard for me to accept, it still is.. I'm secretly hoping he changes his mind after we've been together for awhile and he's healed from his divorce more..)
At first I wafer a little on leaving my secure housing behind (I've lived there for over 10 years) it's really hard to find a 3 bedroom in the city I live in that's affordable. Housing is almost nonexistent hence why we were looking for over a year.. He gets upset and almost feels like he's going to pull out on the offer so I reassure him that I'm just getting cold feet and will move in. He closes on the house and we have plans that he's going to move his stuff in this month, finish up with a few renovations and by the next few months I'll move in with my kids as well. During this transition we're still technically living together. We haven't slept apart since we started dating.
Now HE'S wafering on if he wants me to move in. He's reluctant when I want to move furniture in. He tells me he wants me to keep my apartment "just in case".. He wants us to "take it slow".. Even though we already live together at my apartment and have lived together for over two years.. Even though my kids already have "their" rooms planned out, even though we have this baby together, even though (my plans anyway, he says his too but idk..) are to be in this together long term and raise our kids together... I've already started bringing stuff here. We've been walking down to the new house with the kids almost every day since we got it (about two weeks ago). Every other day I feel like it's held over my head. I feel this sense of uncertainty and it's gut wrenching. It makes me so sad. It makes me feel a sense or rejection and abandonment. (I also have bpd and those "feelings" are really the worse for me)
I don't know what to do. I'm ready to settle down and move on with our lives but at the same time maybe I'm just being an idiot and he's taking advantage of me. I don't know. Maybe I'm risking my kids stability but moving in with a guy who doesn't even want to marry me. I don't really know what to think sometimes. It makes me depressed. I think I covered the gist of it. Idk there's so much to this "story"... if anyone bothers to read, thank you... I'm just feeling alone and don't know where to turn.

Today my friend,D, came to me and told me that his best friend, Z, has the nudes of a girl we know, B. I was shocked because, first of all, B is a hijabi and second why would she send nudes to him. They’ve never dated and practically hate each other.
Then D tells me that B was actually harassing Z for a long time now and sent these nudes to him. We don’t know why B is harassing Z, but D told me that he seemed to be a lot of distress, hence why he told D. And D told me because he was equally disturbed and felt the secret was a big burden on him. Now I haven’t seen the video, but according to D it was really explicit.
Anyways, after hearing this I was absolutely confused and just didn’t feel well and I felt lost even if it didn’t involve me. My main concern is if I should tell the teachers or not, because on one side, B is a hijabi and is underage (we are all) and on the other side, Z technically got sexually harassed, still has the photos and we don’t know what he’s gonna do with them. Like my concern is about the fact that B sent explicit content to Z and that Z still has the photos and is doing god knows what with them. Like I don’t know on which side I should be, if I should be taking sides, what I should do or if I should just leave it. D wants to keep it a secret and wants to never talk about it
Anyways this was partially just to get it off my chest and I don’t even know why I’m so disturbed 💀
Thank you for reading this until the end if there’s anyone still here.

I love my boyfriend so much. We've been together for 8 years and he is my best friend. I am deeply attached to him and he is everything I'd want. The only issue is maybe for the last few years, I've started to lose physical and sexual attraction towards him. I absolutely hate myself for this and it's started making me depressed. I feel so superficial. But I want this relationship to work because I love him. I would do anything for him. He deserves everything and I don't want to hurt him. He's started noticing how I'm not really interested in any sort of intimacy with him. Idk...it's honestly uncomfortable for me and feels forced. I simply don't feel sexually intimate towards him. I never look at him and just want to rip his clothes off, the way he feels towards me. And I can see that it hurts him when I don't reciprocate, or don't really seem interested in making out with him :( He even brought it up to me and cried once. He said he could tell I maybe wasn't as attracted to him and maybe it was because he gained weight. and that KILLLED ME to hear. I have never told him I don't find him attractive. And it's destroying me that this hurt him and he's probably lettign his mind go all over as to why I'm not intimate with him. I hate that he's hurting so much because of this superficial thing that i can't seem to get over. I don't want to leave him and I don't want another man. I just want to feel physically and sexually attracted to him again and I don't know how :( I try to give him the world in every other aspect. But this is becoming a problem and it's hurting both of us deeply