Chian reynolds husband

I think I'm just a lesbian. I told myself for a few years now I had to be bi/pan because I was married and had 3 kids and I love my husband.
But after I read the Am I a Lesbian Masterdoc, I began questioning things. All of the hang ups I had were exicitly explained in the doc, i.e. put I am attracted to literary characters who are men, I would let Ryan Reynolds or Henry Cavill hit me with a car and I'd say thank you. I would flirt with me for validation, but the second they wanted any kind of intimacy from me, I would be filled with dread. I even remember blowing off my current husbandultiple times before he just showed up at my house (with last minute consent) because I kept coming up with excuses as to why I had to cancel our dates.
What really got me is that as I've been struggling more and more with sexual arousal in my marriage, I have asked to experiment with power dynamic exchanges such as sub/Dom play and then the doc called that behavior out too.
I don't know what to do. I don't want to blow up my family. I don't want to go through another divorce (I was married at 18 to my first husband, an abusive POS) but I am tired of being in the closet. I'm tired of feeling anxiety and dread whenever I am expected to be physically intimate anymore (a feeling that I didn't used to have, but that has developed over the last year or so). I haven't admitted to him that I think I'm a lesbian, when I was toying with the idea 3 years ago, the hurt and fear on his face broke me. I can't hurt him again.
Can anyone tell me if they realized they were lesbians while married and somehow... I dunno... Made it work? Please let me know. I am so confused and scared right now because it feels like I either have to go through the fear and chaos of a divorce with children, or never truly be fully satisfied in my relationship.
Thanks in advance

It’s a super uncomfortable movie. The only one that’s ever freaked me out. I think it had Ryan Reynolds or maybe Jake Gyllenhaal.
After running them off the road, the group of antagonists say that they’ll change the tire and starts separating the husband from his family. They can all tell what’s going on. Eventually, the antagonists say they’ll have to go into town to get parts and say two or three of the guys will drive in one car with the wife and daughter while the other rides with the husband in a separate car. And, well, yeah. The antagonists get their way.
I didn’t finish the movie, so I don’t know what happens after that.

YOUR PAST AND MINE ARE PARALLEL LINES (TIMELINES)
November 2014: Taylor goes to a The 1975 concert with friends and meets Matt. Matt says in an Australian radio interview that they exchanged numbers that he wouldn’t say no to going out with her.
Around this time, Matt Healy and Taylor Swift are both seen wearing each other’s merchandise.
December 2014: Taylor Swift attends a The 1975 show in New York City with Karlie Kloss. This is where the Karlie Kloss/Taylor Swift kissgate happens. We aren’t getting into that here.
There are some loose tabloid rumors that Healy and Swifty are dating but nothing concrete.
January 2015: Matt denies the dating rumors.
February 2015: Taylor is photographed hanging in the same group as Matt at the Brits. This is also widely assumed to be the night she met Calvin Harris. (This night will come back into play at a later time)
March 2016: Also around this time, Matt makes, and later clarifies, a comment about how it would be “emasculating” to be Taylor Swift’s boyfriend. He says that he admires her and calls her hard working and beautiful. He also said in a post that “Now I may admit to being an idiot on occasion, but I am not a misogynist. This suggestion makes me really sad.” He also said, “I was for a very short time immersed in a celebrity world that I found confusing and scary. At that time, I had fears of being ‘somebody's boyfriend’ (remember this is all speculation as we never dated!) before even being recognized for my music or presence as a person in my own right.”
May 2016: Taylor and Joe are both photographed separately at the MET gala. Her hair is bleached, his is buzzed. She later references their styling in her Rep era song “Dress” which leads many fans to think they met this night. I actually think they were introduced in LA a bit earlier by Gigi Hadid, which is referenced in the Rep Era track, “Gorgeous.” (sunset and vine, anyone?). Their hairstyles would’ve been the same for this, so it keeps “dress” as canon either way. She is also seen dancing with Tom Hiddleston here, but the news of the Calvin breakup hasn’t happened yet. We aren’t getting into this here but this is when this all starts to go down.
October 2016: Taylor and Joe attend the same Kings of Leon concert
May 2017: News breaks that Taylor and Joe are dating
November 2018: Alwyn makes his first appearance on Swift’s social media in a story she makes promoting a film he is in
January 2019: Taylor attends the Golden Globes in support of Joe
February 2019: Taylor skips the Grammy’s and is photographed at some BAFTA’s after parties in support of and with Joe
March 2019: Tabloids begin reporting that Joe and Taylor are talking about marriage
August 2019: The Lover album is released with many nods to positive feelings about marriage (marriage and evolving feelings/references to marriage are discussed in greater detail in a later section)
September 2019: Matt Healy mentions in an interview/talk show that he would love to collaborate with Taylor Swift and make an acoustic album.
December 2019: Joe makes a rare mention of Taylor in an interview and says songs about him are flattering and most tabloid rumors are untrue.
January 2020: Miss Americana releases. Taylor says that she feels like Lover is her last chance to grasp onto this kind of success as a pop star approaching/entering her thirties. She talks about falling in love with Joe and living in his “wonderful, normal” life.
February 2020: Joe and Taylor discreetly attend the NME awards together but are photographed by fans. Matt Healy is also at the show and The 1975 perform.
Here is a video of them talking: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7Y5O--CYm0
Matt Healy and FKA Twigs also begin publicly dating around this time.
August 2020: Folklore surprise drops. New co-writer, William Bowery, is widely assumed to be Joe. Taylor later confirms this in the folklore long pond Disney special in November and talks a bit about Joe creating/writing with her in quarantine, though keeps it pretty vague.
December 2020: Taylor Swift surprises drops Evermore. William Bowery, aka Joe, receives more writing credits on Champagne Problems, Evermore, and Coney Island.
Taylor and Joe are notably incredibly private and keep their relationship private. They both talk about “protecting” it. She is not papped often, but is spotted in Belfast in September of 2021 where Joe is filming.
November 2021: Taylor is spotted visited Joe filming in Panama.
February 2022: Joe says is very happy in his relationship after being asked a weird question by an interviewer on a panel for his upcoming Hulu series.
April 2022: Elle UK asks Joe why he doesn’t comment on his relationship with Taylor. He responds, “We live in a culture that is so increasingly intrusive. THe more you give, and frankly, even if you don’t give it, something will be taken.”
June 2022: Matt Healy and FKA Twigs split up
August 2022: Joe, Taylor, and Lena Dunham are seen having dinner at members only dining club, Casa Cirpriani. This place also will be relevant later.
October 2022: Joe and Taylor are seen walking around New York in October just before the Midnights release. This is the last time they are photographed together.
Both Midnights and The 1975’s Being Funny a Foreign Language release. Taylor says Lavender Haze is inspired by her 6 year relationship and dodging weird rumors, and just wanting to stay in that “all-encompassing love glow.” I don’t think blondie is being truthful here but more on that later.
William Bowery- aka Joe, is only credited as a writer on one song, “Sweet Nothing”
November 2022: Matt says that he and Taylor worked on some songs for Midnights, but they were cut from the final album. He said the cuts were “for reasons that are not to be criticized. She’s amazing.”
Also in November, Joe shares an instagram story of Benjamin Button, one of Taylor’s cats.
Also in November, The 1975 embarks on their “At Their Very Best” tour in support of their new album. “Question…?” is on the pre-show playlist.
January 12, 2023: Taylor is a surprise guest at The 1975 show in London. She plays “Anti-Hero” for the first time live and The 1975’s “The City” acoustically.
Taylor Swift - Live at The 1975's At Their Very Best Tour (2023)
February 2023: Joe shares an instagram story featuring one of Taylor’s cats.
Taylor Swift also attends the Grammy’s and hosts a Grammy’s after party where she’s photographed wearing a leather jacket that looks a lot like Joe’s. They are not photographed together. A photo of Joe and Jack Antanoff from that night comes out so it does look like Joe was present.
The Sun’s article, which will come out in May, suggests Joe and Taylor broke up around this time.
The Mirror will publish an article May 20 will report that a source close to Matty’s ex, Meredith, said Matty started spending time with Taylor in the studio around February. Another source said their studio time was actually in January.
Friday, March 17, 2023: Eras Tour Opening Night, Glendale. The 1975’s “About You” is a permanent fixture on the pre-show playlist. No one thinks anything of it.
Joe does not appear at any Eras shows. It is assumed he is filming or staying private, though it is pretty sus since he has been consistently visible in VIP tents at previous shows (Lover performances and Rep tour, notably). An article comes out saying they’re just fine and he will make it when he can. Sure, Jan.
March 31, 2023: Eras Tour, Arlington, TX. Instead of opening the Folklore portion of her set with “Invisible String.” an obvious nod to her romance with Joe, she instead opens the set with “The 1.” After the next week, this later feels like foreshadowing/a clue.
April 8, 2023: Taylor Swift and Joe Alywn’s breakups appears in the press over Easter Weekend/an off week for the Eras Tour. It is also Matt Healy’s birthday.
April 9, 2023: A tiktok is posted from a previous Eras show of Taylor becoming a bit emotional while singing Champagne Problems, a song she wrote with Joe about turning down a proposal. Taylor is known to really vibe with her songs regardless of content/where she’s at personally, so I don’t want to read too much into this. Her changing relationship with discussing marriage in her songs and how shes marriage, and how that has changed across her recent discography is noteworthy and will be discussed in a later section.
April 10, 2023: Matt Healy deletes his instagram account. This may have happened on the 9th- he wasn’t being “watched” as closely yet so I haven’t been able to confirm exactly what day the instagram went bye-bye but it was within these two days.
April 11, 2023: Taylor Swift is papped walking to have dinner with Jack Antanoff and his fiance, Margaret Qualley. They eat at a restaurant just four blocks away from Cornelia Street- which some fans take as a nod to her Lover era track, “Cornelia Street.” Many take her solo pap walk as confirmation of the breakup, since we haven’t seen her be this public since pre Rep-Era/pre-Joe
April 13, 2023: Celebrity gossip shitposter DeuxMoi posts that Alwyn initiated the break up and leaked it to the press. I disagree with this take and think its balgoney due to the timing of the release being the best case scenario for her touring schedule. The fact that the leak happened during an off week, on Matt’s birthday, right after she swapped out Invisible String for The 1 kind of debunks this theory for me personally.
Also on this day is Eras Tour, Tampa. Before playing “Lover”, Taylor says to the crowd, “Some of these songs are about my life; some of these songs are about fictional characters I created. But my hope in all of this is that, at the end of the day, these songs will be songs that you think are about your own life. And the song that we’re about to play net, it’s just a love song, you know?”
April 18, 2023: Emma Laird, one of Joe’s current co-stars, shares a photo of him on a scooter amongst a carousel of other posts of other co-stars from her time filming a new movie. The photos are part of a March photo dump.
April 19-20 2023: Ryan Reynolds, Blake Lively, the Haim sisters, and Swift’s brother Austin all unfollow Joe Alwyn on instagram around this time, but notably after Emma’s post. Most notable from the Great Unfollowing is Ryan, because he previously wrote a really nice tribute to Alwyn in Time.
Joe is photographed in London looking disheveled (whatever). Taylor is photographed in NYC again, this time with the Haim sisters, Gigi Hadid, and Blake. They go to a private club/celebrity hot spot Zero Bond.
April 21, 2023: just a day after being photographed with Taylor, Gigi unfollows Joe on instagram. This is notable because Gigi and Joe have been friends for a while and she is rumored to have introduced them in LA ahead of the MET gala (sunset and vine .. . ahem)
On the Eras Tour in Houston, during her performance of Look What You Made Me Do, dancers are dressed in iconic outfits from each era in glass cages dancing behind Taylor while she performs. On this night, however, Taylor shoots the “L” forehead “loser” sign to the “Lover” era Taylor. Fans take this as a dig at Alwyn, since that entire album was basically about how much she loved him.
April 23, 2023: longtime Swift bestie Abigail unfollows Joe on instagram
May 3, 2023: The Sun (ew) reports that Taylor and Matt are dating. The article says they have been face-timing a lot since they are both touring.
May 4, 2023: The 1975 add an older track “She’s American” to their show in Manila. Before the first verse, Healy shouts “She sure is!” At this show, Healy is seen mouthing “This one’s about you, you know who you are, I love you” before playing “About You” which is a song off their most recent album and also the song on the Era’s pre-show playlist.
https://youtube.com/shorts/PMWJ8L8n6G8?feature=share
May 5, 2023: Matt Healy appears at The Eras Tour, Nashville, Night 1 in the VIP tent. It is noteworthy that he was in Manila performing the day before (an estimated 17 hour flight away). There are videos of him and Phoebe Bridgers dancing their hearts out to Shake It Off. He is VIBING. It is also worth noting he was in Manila the day before, performing, so being here at all is kind of incredible.
Also notable during the show is, during Cardigan, Taylor can be seen mouthing almost the identical phrase Matt mouthed the night before onstage in Manila. “You know who you are. I love you”
May 6, 2023: Matt Healy appears at The Eras Tour, Nashville, Night 2. He performs alongside Phoebe Bridgers during her opening set and then later is back at the VIP tent, this time alongside Gigi Hadid who grabs his shoulders and shakes him cutely while Taylor plays “Lover.” Matt is also sporting another 1989 tee shirt.
After the show, they were papped in her car, presumably heading to her Nashville home.
May 11, 2023: Taylor and Matt are photographed holding hands at an exclusive, member’s only restaurant in New York. The member’s only club is Casa Cipriani and has an an explicit no photography, no video, and no social media policy. Rumor has it the individuals who took these photos have had their memberships revoked.
📷
May 12, 2023: It’s Eras Tour, Philadelphia, Night 1. Matt performs with Phoebe Bridgers again. He later joins Blake Lively in the VIP tent. They seem warm towards each other in videos and seem to be laughing a lot.
May 13, 2023: Eras Tour, Philadelphia, Night 3. Matt is spotted not in the VIP tent, but up in a box thing with Taylor’s dad, Scott Swift. They are also vibing and appear to be having a good time.
May 15, 2023: Taylor and Matt are papped leaving Electric Lady Studios (where they both often record with Jack Antanoff) together. Healy has his hand on Taylor’s back.
May 18, 2023: The Sun reports Joe Alwyn is “distraught”
May 20, 2023: Eras Tour, Gillette Stadium, Night 2. Before playing the first surprise song of the night on acoustic guitar (Question . . .?) Taylor says “I don’t know, I have just never been this happy in my life, in all aspects of my life, ever before. And I just want to thank you for being a part of that. Like, you know, I don’t know, it’s not just the tour, it’s like, I don’t know, I just sort of feel like my life finally feels like it makes sense. And so I thought I’d play this song, which brings me a lot of happy memories.”
Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3-iRxkGUR-c
BLANK SPACES (TIMELINE QUESTIONS)

• When did Matt and Taylor begin work on Midnights/music together?
• When did Joe and Taylor actually break up?

NOTES ON MIDNIGHTS, CONCEPTUALLY, AND INITIAL RECEPTION

• The lead up to Midnights featured 70’s aesthetic design and artwork (a nod to the 1975, perhaps? Or some subconscious inspiration leaking out?)
• The album is announced, and advertised, as the stories of 13 sleepless nights scattered throughout her life
• The cover features her holding a lighter. On tour, during the 1989 set, which is the last full album set before Midnights, the Lover house appears on the screen behind her and is burned to the ground.
• Taylor tells us via instagram/tiktok in September that the back of the limited edition vinyl sleeves make a clock. An instagram account suggests that clocks can go fowards and backwards (counter clockwise).
• Initial reception was positive, but fans were a bit confused by the album artwork, how troubled she looked in photos despite this album seeming to have happy love songs about Joe, and were a bit confused about why she is still singing/writing about early days in their relationship
• It was also noted at this time that she sings negatively about marriage from a more confessional standpoint

I’D MARRY YOU WITH PAPER RINGS . . . or would I? (EVOLUTION OF MARRIAGE THEMES)
While Taylor has consistently sung about wanting a fairy tale, forever romance across her early works, we are going to mostly look at Lover, Folklore/Evermore, and Midnights as they seem most representative of her relationship with Joe and her most recent thoughts/feelings.
Lover

• “I like shiny things but I’d marry you with Paper Rings” - Paper Rings
• “He’d better lock it down or I won’t stick around” - I think He Knows
• The bridge of “Lover” is structured to sound like a wedding vow. She also released a “first dance” version of this song
• In the closing track, “Daylight” she refers to their love as “golden, like daylight” and says she “once believed love would be burning red.” In the Red album introduction, she says that she thinks real love shines golden, and that she might write a whole album about that kind of love if she ever finds it.

Folklore/Evermore

• While Folklore and Evermore were pitched to the public as a mostly fictional albums about imaginary worlds and characters, writers’ own biases are often woven throughout their work This album is riddled with references to infidelity and shows a real thematic fascination with infidelity and the ending of marriage.
• Reviewing the songs about marriage from the perspective of viewing the narrator as Taylor and the husband, or individual/thing she is married to, being her careefame/public life, brings these songs into a new light. Was Taylor writing from this place? We will never know, and she will never tell us. But I do not think it is a stretch to think that she either consciously or subconsciously identified with those feelings and was able to write about them by placing them into this alternative, marriage context within the world of folklore/evermore.

For example, “Illicit Affairs” is about having a secret lover, but the narrator (Taylor) never mentions that she is indeed cheating on someone. She also refers to her relationship in Red’s “All Too Well” as an affair (did the love affair maim you too?). So it’s entirely possible that affair, in this context, just means a passionate, secret relationship. Is this a song about her romantic life feeling like a secret?
Midnights

• Marriage is referenced in the opening track, “Lavender Haze”. “The only kind of girl they see is a one night or a bride” “that 1950’s shit they want from me” and on Midnight Rain “He wanted a bride I was making my own name, chasing that fame”

I PLAY MY SONGS IN THE PARKING LOT(potentially lyrical hints from Matty to Taylor)
Let’s start with “About You”.
This song is off The 1975’s most recent album “Being Funny in A Foreign Language” which was made with Jack Antanoff. This song appears on the Era’s pre-show playlist and it is also the one Matt Healy mouthed “This one’s about you, you know who you are, I love you” before playing right after news broke that he and Taylor were together.
I know a place
It's somewhere I go when I need to remember your face
We get married in our heads
Something to do while we try to recall how we met
Do you think I have forgotten?
Do you think I have forgotten?
Do you think I have forgotten
About you?
You and I (don't let go) were alive (don't let go)
With nothing to do, I could lay and just look in your eyes
Wait (don't let go) and pretend (don't let go)
Hold on and hope that we'll find our way back in the end
Do you think I have forgotten?
Do you think I have forgotten?
Do you think I have forgotten
About you?
Do you think I have forgotten?
Do you think I have forgotten?
Do you think I have forgotten
About you?
There was something 'bout you that now I can't remember
It's the same damn thing that made my heart surrender
And I miss you on a train, I miss you in the morning
I never know what to think about
I think about you (so don't let go)
About you (so don't let go)
Do you think I have forgotten
About you? (Don't let go)
About you
About you
Do you think I have forgotten
About you? (Don't let go)
He also added “She’s American” to the set that night- which is an older song that is likely not about Taylor but it is a potential nod to her.
While I am not convinced it’s necessarily about Taylor, I have also been listening to “When We Are Together” off their album a lot. Something about it feels very Taylor to me- especially the references to both people getting cancelled (slag is british slang for a someone who dates too much/sleeps around)
Our first kiss was Christmas in the Walmart toy department
She said, "I should take you with me when I leave"
When we were searchin' New York for a fancy, new apartment
She said, "Central Park is Sea World for trees"
You ask about the cows, wearin' my sweater
It's somethin' 'bout the weather that makes them lie down
The only time I feel I might get better is when we are together
I like socks with sandals, she's more into scented candles
Oh, I'll never get that smell out of my bag
And it was poorly handled, the day we both got canceled
Because I'm a racist and you're some kind of slag
You ask about the cows, wearin' my sweater
It's somethin' 'bout the weather that makes them lie down
The only time I feel I might get better is when we are together, oh, together
"I'm better at writing" was just a way to get you biting, oh
The truth is that our egos are absurd
I thought we were fighting but it seems I was gaslighting you
I didn't know that it had its own word
You still ask about the cows, wearin' my sweater
Said it's something 'bout the weather that makes them lie down
The only time I feel I might get better is when we are together
The Song “Me and You Together Song” off their 2020 album “Notes on A Conditional Form” is also played on their current tour. Here are the lyrics (and a video of Matt performing it in Manila- after their relationship has leaked and the night before he goes to see Taylor perform in Nashville). He begins the song by singing a later part: “I’ve been in love with her for ages, and I can’t seem to get it right, I’ve been in love with her for stages, my whole life” and then shouts “That’s right” into the mic before the song takes off from the beginning. It would appear this was a dedication to Taylor.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FSuCAuheBM0
can remember when we met
Because she didn't have a top on (A top on)
I improvised a little bit
She said my references were spot on (Spot on)
"Can I take you for a drink?"
She said, "Oh God, I'll have to think
Because we're mates, it doesn't feel right" (Feel right)
And I said, "It's cool, " and "I was messing" but it's true
Yeah, it's you, you're the one that makes me feel right
I've been in love with her for ages
And I can't seem to get it right
I fell in love with her in stages
My whole life
I had a dream where we had kids
You would cook, I'd do the nappies (Nappies)
We went to Winter Wonderland
And it was shit but we were happy (Happy)
I'm sorry that I'm kinda queer, it's not as weird as it appears
It's 'cause my body doesn't stop me (Stop me)
Oh, it's okay, lots of people think I'm gay
But we're friends, so it's cool, why would it not be? (Not be)
I've been in love with her for ages
And I can't seem to get it right
I fell in love with her in stages
My whole life
And that's been now way for me to say
That I felt a certain way in stages, oh
I think the story needs more pages, yes
I've been in love with her for ages (And ages)
And ages, I've been in love with her for ages (And ages)
Ages, I've been in love with her for ages
And ages, and ages, I've been in love with her for ages
And ages, and ages, I've been in love with her for ages
And ages, and ages (Yeah), I've been in love with you for ages
For ages, and ages (I've been in love, yeah)
I've been in love with you for ages
MEET ME AT MIDNIGHT (a post-breakup interpretation of Midnights)
We know at some point between 2019’s Lover and 2023’s Midnights, Taylor’s feelings about marriage and her comfortability referencing marriage in a positive way shifted quite a bit. We also know she wrote heavily about turning down proposals, marriages going astray, divorce, and infidelity on folklore/evermore.
I think Midnights tells a different, more cohesive story if you listen to it in reverse order (or perhaps . . . counter clockwise?)
Reverse order playlist here: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4CftQN9K0Y91u1rFcDbB1Z?si=0ea1e855cb5146bd
Labyrinth

• This is where things get interesting
• I think this song is a breakup song about falling in love with someone else while falling out of love with another person
• Lyrics like “it only hurts this much right now” “I thought the plane was going down, how’d you turn it right now” “oh no, I’m falling in love again” allude to feeling pain, but also feeling herself slipping into love with someone else and feeling anxious about it.

Bejeweled

• There has been a LOT of discussion on this song
• In hindsight, this song feels less like Taylor’s return to pop music and more of a post-breakup anthem
• She references “The band” in the line “when I meet the band, they ask do you have a man, I can still say I don’t remember”
• The song is about going out and sparkling after feeling unappreciated
• The lyrics I find most interested at this time are: “Sapphire tears on my face, sadness became my whole sky, but some guy said my aura’s moonstone, just ‘cause he was high”
• Sapphire = blue, Joe is often associated with blue throughout Lover and on hoax “don’t want no other shade of blue, but you”
• Matty Healy definitely smokes the weed
• Matty Healy is also known to have synesthesia, which I think is an interesting note considering “some guy said my aura’s moonstone just ‘cause he was high”

Question . . .?

• A lot of people attributed this song to Harry Styles because it samples “Out of The Woods” which is widely believed to be about Harry. However, I think the sampling is to set the timeline, not the person. Matt and Taylor met/might’ve hooked up during the 1989 era. I think the “I remember” in the beginning of this song is placing it in that timeline, not referencing that person
• “You painted all my nights, a color I have searched for since” could also be a reference to Matty’s synesthesia
• The song references politics and gender roles, which Matt frequently sings about
• I think this song is referencing a time in her life where she and Matt almost dated, and then didn’t. And she’s asking him “what if?”
• She also references “half moon eyes” which I think physically describe Matt much better than Harry
• I think the reference to “dickhead guy” is Calvin. I think she’s referencing the Brit awards where she hung out with Matty, but met Calvin (see the timeline). I think this is Joe/Tom 2.0. I think she and Matt were interested in each other, but she met Calvin and dated him instead and the Calvin -> Tom -> Joe timeline started instead.
• When she sang this song on May 20 as the surprise song at Gillette, she said she is the happiest she’s ever been, that it’s not just the tour, and that this song brings back happy memories. The fact that this is the song that appears on the 1975’s pre show playlist makes me think it’s definitely a call back to a time they almost got together but didn’t.
• https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3-iRxkGUR-c (the video of her performing and speech before she plays it)

Midnight Rain

• People have theorized this is about a more previous ex, but I think this song is really just about a feeling. This song is about choosing her careefame over a quiet more traditional life

You’re on Your Own, Kid

• She is single, ya’ll

Snow On The Beach

• I think this song is also about falling in love with Matt or reconnecting with him
• This song is about falling in love with someone unexpected
• I think the references to “what could’ve been” tie in with Question, and the referenced to her flight being awful tie into Labyrinth (thought the plane was going down, how’d you turn it right around”

One night, a few moons ago
I saw flecks of what could've been lights
But it might just have been you
Passing by unbeknownst to me
Life is emotionally abusive
And time can't stop me quite like you did
And my flight was awful, thanks for asking
I'm unglued, thanks to you
And it's like snow at the beach
Weird but fuckin' beautiful
Flying in a dream, stars by the pocketful
You wanting me tonight feels impossible
But it's comin' down, no sound, it's all around
Like snow on the beach
Like snow on the beach
Like snow on the beach
Like snow, oh, oh oh
This scene feels like what I once saw on a screen
I searched aurora borealis green
I've never seen someone lit from within
Blurring out my periphery
My smile is like I won a contest
And to hide that would be so dishonest
And it's fine to fake it 'til you make it
'Til you do, 'til it's true
Now it's like snow at the beach
Weird but fuckin' beautiful
Flying in a dream, stars by the pocketful
You wanting me tonight feels impossible
But it's comin' down, no sound, it's all around
Like snow on the beach
Like snow on the beach
Like snow on the beach
Like snow, oh, oh oh
I (I) can't (can't) speak afraid to jinx it
I (I) don't (don't) even dare to wish it
But your eyes are flying saucers from another planet
Now I'm all for you like Janet
Can this be a real thing? Can it?
Are we falling like snow at the beach? (Snow at the beach)
Weird but fuckin' beautiful
Flying in a dream, stars by the pocketful (flying in a dream)
You wanting me tonight feels impossible (you wanting me)
But it's comin' down, no sound, it's all around
Like snow on the beach (snow on the beach)
Like snow on the beach (flying in a dream)
Like snow on the beach (you wanting me)
Like snow, oh
But it's comin' down, no sound, it's all around
Like snow on the beach (it's comin' down, it's comin' down)
(It's comin' down, it's comin' down)
(Like snow on the beach)
(It's comin' down, it's comin' down, it's comin' down, it's comin' down)
(It's comin' down, it's comin' down, it's comin' down, it's comin' down)
(Comin' down, it's comin' down, it's comin' down, it's comin' down)

So I (22M) always thought i was only into women. I would always joke about being gay for guys like ryan reynolds or corpse husband with my friends, but obviously, i never actually meant it. Well, that was the case until I was listening to MISA MISA by corpse husband and it actually made me feel like the sub Ive recently found out I am. Just to confirm that it wasnt a fluke, one of my female friends showed me some guy thirst traps, and well, it was working. I have no issues with it, ive always been an ally, but this new identity is becoming very confusing really quickly. I think its pretty late to find this out, and I dont really know what to feel and I cant get my feelings straight. Any advice on how to sort my feelings or how I should go about it would be really really helpful.

So when CA dropped the roadmap they said that for the 5.0 update we'd get "Free Legendary Hero: Another Legendary Hero joins the toolbox. No hints on this one… (you already have all the clues you need!)" Obviously everyone's been trying to figure out what the clues in question are, and a number of people have pointed to the loading screen lore quotes as potential clues.
So I decided to go into the game files, extract all the loading screen lore quotes and look them over at once and see if I could notice any patterns. Here are my findings.
First off, I'm prioritizing any quotes from Kislev or Cathay. We have very little info about their potential characters and if any character names are mentioned repeatedly or if any character is described in detail those seem very relevant. Second, I'm ignoring quotes about other factions that don't refer to a character who had rules of some sort for tabletop. This might seem limiting but after going over all the quotes there wasn't much from characters who were just in novels or ancillary sources anyway. I'm also ignoring quotes about/from characters already in the game. Finally, there are are a number of quotes sourced to "unknown" or "anonymous" sources, a few of which are very, very obvious hints. Those get a lot of scrutiny. I'm also keeping the format of these quotes as they appear in the game files mostly intact. All that said, here are the quotes that seem relevant:

• CATHAY

2loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_lore_59± There are numerous courts in the empire of Grand Cathay, ranging from the Court of the Dragon Emperor to which his wife and children all nominally belong to the Iron Court or the Monkey Court, that govern specific peoples or regions within the empire. Perhaps the most important of these is the Court of the Jade Dragon, known as the Jade Court. Equal in power to the Celestial Court, it manages the day-to-day running of Cathay.
2loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_lore_66 Calling the Monkey Court a 'court' is perhaps being generous, as the Monkey King and his people seldom do anything so organised as hold court. Even so, much like the Tiger Court, the Monkey King is expected to govern his monkey warriors in the same way the Dragons rule over the people of Cathay. When the Monkey Court meets it is always a chaotic affair, and while the Monkey King smugly believes himself to be the equal of any of the Dragons, other Cathayans can only look on in horror at the disorganised way in which he rules his kingdom
2loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_lore_22 In the year 2377 by Imperial reckoning the Monkey King seized power in Cathay. He installed Warlord Kishkik of Clan Eshin as an advisor, and began trade with the Skaven. The Dragons finally settled their differences and united to oppose the upstart Monkey Emperor.
Dloading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_cathayan_proverb_01\ You are as honourless as the Monkey King, yet your ancestor was as principled as a Tigerman.
Dloading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_cathayan_solider_01Ù You are from the west & you know nothing of the Monkey Warriors, you haven't seen how they rip off heads and eat the tongues of their enemy. If you had, you'd quickly drop that mocking gaze and bow your head in terror.
2loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_lore_41n The depiction of the Monkey King varies wildly depending on the region and local legends. In the north, poets sing about a raging gorilla that bellows for blood. Storytellers of the western mountains tell of a baboon-like creature with beautiful golden hair and an engorged rear for the king is always in heat. The legends of the eastern coast portray him as a large, gluttonous orangutan his exposed belly raw and covered in unsightly boils. And in some parts of the south the Monkey King is said to be a slight spider-monkey that jumps upon the shoulders of allies and enemies alike, whispering half-truths and lies.
@loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_general_peng_01E The storyteller spoke of so many things he told tall tales of the Monkey King and that the Empire in the far-west have metal rooms on wheels powered by heating water! We all laughed at that. The next morning, he was gone, and the fights broke out among my troops. Then I knew we had been visited by an agent of Chi'an Chi.

All of the above quotes are about or indirectly reference The Monkey King. He's the Cathayan character with the most loading screen quotes related to him. The last two quotes also tie into some things that Andy Hall, the head writer of TW:WH, said regarding the Changeling, a Tzeentchian character, manipulating public perception of the Monkey King in Cathay. There are no loading screen quotes that actually reference the Changeling directly; this is as close as we get.

2loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_lore_64Þ The greatest of the Artificers is Shi-Hong, the Blind Master, and one of the Nine Lords of Nan-Gau. Despite his disability, Shi-Hong has a vast collection of unique weapons and explosives which he often distributes to the Nan-Gau units he commands. He is also the creator of the Sky-junk, and when he must travel far from Nan-Gau often rides to battle in his own personal war balloon the Wind of Heaven a graceful creation boasting experimental weapons and unique ordnance.

This is the only quote describing a human Cathayan character in detail. It seems likely he may show up as either a Legendary Lord or more likely a Legendary Hero somewhere down the road. "Artificer" also sounds like it could easily end up being the name of a new type of generic Cathayan hero.

2loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_lore_26¸ In the north, the empire is bordered by the Great Bastion that defends against the Chaos Wastes. The Great Bastion is a wonder of engineering and sorcery that has grown more formidable with each passing century. Raised in -1800IC, it has endured for almost as long as the empire itself. It is said that each brick of the bastion was shaped by the Jade Dragon, tempered by the Fire Dragon and blessed by the Iron Dragon to give it strength.
loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_li_dao_01N Those in the central provinces always look to the north; to the grandstanding of my sister at the Great Bastion. Meanwhile, I must marshal the BurningWinds, defend our borders against the Nagas and serpents of Khuresh, keep peace with the tigers of Ind, and war with the Monkey King's legions that come down from Mountains of Heaven

These are the only two quotes that reference Li Dao, the Fire Dragon, which makes him the third most mentioned Cathayan character in the loading screen quotes.

Loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_yin_yin_01 The Elves name their vessels 'Dragonships'. I find this amusing. Perhaps it is in tribute to me? After all, I am a Dragon and my war-junks dominate the seas.>

This is the only quote about or relating to Yin-Yin, the Sea Dragon.

;loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_yuan_bo_01ò Chaos is anathema to harmony and so we must fight it with every measure of your flesh and soul. You shall give your lives willingly if required, for the Dragon Emperor and Moon Empress must preserve and ensure that harmony is kept in balance.;
loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_yuan_bo_02Ù Those in other nations may deny it, but all mortals desire control. To be controlled, that is. Why else would they conjure these northern Gods that obsess in dominating the very creatures that brought them into being?;
loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_yuan_bo_03Ì My siblings believe I am a bureaucrat. It's an image I am happy to foster. Let them think of me as a mere administrator and scribe. That way my true power remains hidden from them and our greater enemies.
2loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_lore_58ë The Jade Dragon is the architect of the Dragon Emperors plans, and not even the other Dragons can see all the strings he pulls. Part of this grand manipulation involves governing the Sorcerers of the Celestial Court, whose magic is integral to the scheme's success. It is said that not a single Wizard practises within the empire without the knowledge of the Jade Dragon, and after the Celestial Dragon himself, none of the Dragons are as adept at manipulating the elemental Winds of Magic.

All of these quotes are by or about Yuan Bo, the Jade Dragon, making him the second most referenced character in any of the Cathayan quotes. Make of that what you will, but I feel like it means he has a very good shot to make it into the game.

• KISLEV

2loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_lore_50³ The Golden Knight is the champion of the Tzarina. This is an honorary rank bestowed to the greatest warrior among the Druzhina, or occasionally in history, Boyars or even the common soldiery. Every Golden Knight is awarded a freshly-forged suit of immaculate and, oft-rumoured, enchanted armour. The current Golden Knight is Naryaska Leysa, the daughter of the previous champion, and said to be an even greater fighter than her father.

There are a lot of Kislev quotes about Katarin and Boris but this is the only other one describing a named Kislevite character in any detail. She's probably going to make it into the game in some form.

Iloading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_kossar_martice_wojcik_01’ Mother Ostankya will get you! That's what my old babushka would say when we were making too much noise or getting our fingers in the honey jar. For years we thought she was a child's tale to frighten us into behaving.Then one day, in my twentieth winter, I got too close to the woods. And when I was told Mother Ostankya would get you… I knew if I took one step closer to the trees it would be true.

This is the only quote about Mother Ostankya, but it's worth noting she's referenced in several other places, including a building tree tooltip in the game and in the Son of Kislev short story written by Andy Hall and published on the Total War Access portal. The Golden Knight also gets name dropped in that story.

• TZEENTCH

2loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_lore_73h After consulting the Skull of Katam, Egrimm van Horstmann attempts to fuse the sorcerous powers of his chosen cabal with the unholy resilience of Trolls, but his magicks go awry. Egrimm is forced to flee the Citadel of Sorcerers as the newly created breed of Trolls that vomit pure magic run amok, devouring all of the acolytes and apprentices with ravenous hunger

This quote is from the 8th edition Warriors of Chaos army book. Egrimm as a character first got rules in the 5th edition "Champions of Chaos" and also had a novel written about him. Some of the quotes I've found seem to come from novels and not army books but this is the only quote about Egrimm and it's not from his novel, if that means anything.

?loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_amon_chakai_01§ I have watched you since your birth, Gunther Munz and I have watched the birth of your father, his father, and all your ancestors from the time when they still roamed the Plains of the Sun in the Southlands. I have watched you grow and I have watched your studies. I saw how your plans to destroy me came to fruition. I have seen every footstep you have taken to come before me. There is nothing I do not know. You are here because I wished it.

Amon 'Chakai is the oldest and wisest of the Lords of Change. He got rules back in 5th edition, same as Egrimm, and this quote is from that first appearance.

• SKAVEN

loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_thanqoul_01/Leeches! Mosquitos! Poisonous Spiders! Blinding clouds of Gnats!S nakes! Thanqoul's fur crawled as he thought of the snakes. The loathsome things were everywhere, watching them with their unblinking eyes, sniffing at them with their forked tongues. He'd lost count of all the hideous snakes they'd seen!

Thanquol has been long expected as the next Skaven character, but this is the only specific reference to him in the loading screen quotes. I believe it's lifted from one of the Gotrek and Felix novels where they go to Lustria.

loading _screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_skretch_01² Warp... must have Warpstone, yes-yes... catch it, catch it! Sniff it out... give it to Vampire, yes, but not all of it, not all... no-no, Skretch keep... keep some for himself... Must... feed...

Skretch Half-Dead is an undead Skaven captain who served Count Noctilus in the Dreadfleet game. Skretch never had any actual rules for himself as a character, just for his ship, but the same applies to Noctilus and Aranessa, who both first appeared in that game. There are a few quotes from Dreadlfeet characters in the loading screens, but whether that's because they have a real chance of making it into the game or because CA didn't have enough pirate/Vampire Coast themed quotes and wanted something related to that, I don't know.

• KHORNE

&Iloading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_arbaal_the_undefeated_01› Fill the moat with the corpses of your comrades. Trample on their broken carcasses to reach the ramparts. Bring down the walls with the weight of the dead.

Arbaal the Undefeated is another character who first got rules in the 5th edition "Champions of Chaos" supplement. He's a Khornate champion who rides a giant Flesh Hound and in the book is specifically mentioned as commanding an army of daemons. He never made it into the 8th edition army books but interestingly this quote isn't from his 5th edition appearance. I have no idea where it came from, and it may be original to TW. More about Arbaal in a little bit.

loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_scyla_01C KILL FOR KHORNE! KILL FOR KHORNE! KILL FOR KHORNE! KILL FOR KHORNE!

Scyla Anfingrimm is also from "Champions of Chaos" but unlike a lot of the characters from that book he made it into the 8th Edition Warriors of Chaos book as one of the two Khornate characters, the other being Valkia. Scyla is a former Khornate champion turned into a sort of elite Chaos Spawn of Khorne. He can still talk, but as you can see here he's not exactly eloquent. In his 8th edition WoC entry he's noted to still fight in an army of Khorne worshiping barbarians but they treat him as more of a mascot than a leader.

• HIGH ELVES

=loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_caradryan_01O If the ignorant must be slaughtered to destroy the truly wicked, then so be it.
Loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_yrellian_01 My father, the Phoenix King, said that one should always choose the lesser of two evils. How best to discern which is which…

There are a lot of High Elf loading screen quotes about or by Tyrion, Teclis, Alith Anar, and Alarielle. These are the only ones about specific characters other than those already in the game.
Caradryan is the commander of the Phoenix Guard. He had rules in the 8th edition High Elves army book, where he was a Legendary Hero with a Frostheart Phoenix as a mount.
Yrellian is another Dreadfleet character, so again he never had rules of his own but I'm keeping him in for thoroughness' sake. He's an admiral in the High Elf navy and the firstborn son of the Phoenix King himself.

• WARRIORS OF CHAOS

Aloading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_count_mordrek_01Ð I have no right to pray to Sigmar anymore, but from the Daemons guarding the gateway to the Realm of Chaos, I ask for your deliverance. Rest now, sleep for eternity. You are now free of the withering clouds of war

Count Mordrek is yet another character from "Champions of Chaos" and this quote is from that book. He's the only Chaos Undivided character with rules to get a quote in the loading screens, at least of those not already in the game. More on him in a bit.

• GREENSKINS

;loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_gitilla_01Ò Flank em, shoot em, hit em hard, and then do it again from annuver angle. Of course, if da battle is going bad for our side, I’m gonna keep ridin and act like I wuz never there, so yer’d better stick close!

Gtilla the Hunter is a named Wolf Rider character from the 8th edition Orcs and Goblins army book, in which he was a legendary hero. He's the only unimplemented army book character for the Greenskins to get a quote

loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_morglum_01ΠThe only good stunty is a dead stunty, and the only thing better than a dead stunty is a dyin' stunty who tells yer where to find 'is mates.
Loadingscreen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_morglum_necksnapper_01 Let 'em tell da King. Da east belongs to da Orcs. Da east belongs to Morglum. Da east is green.

Morglum Necksnapper is a Black Orc character from 6th edition. He never made it into the Greenskin army books except for quotes (which is where these are from) but he did get rules in one of the ancillary Warhammer publications, either Citadel Journal or White Dwarf magazines, I'm not sure which. He rode a war boar and had a unique magic armor item, you can actually see them here He's the only non-implemented Greenskin character with more than one quote.

• VAMPIRE COUNTS

Loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_konrad_von_carstein_01‡ The truth is like an expensive whore, Jerek. She comes dressed in many pretty dresses and will bend over for any with the money to pamper her.
loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_konrad_von_carstein_02A Sorry to disappoint you, but it seems I am still very much alive.
Loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_konrad_von_carstein_last_words_01 Konrad is betrayed!

Konrad von Karstein is one of Vlad's "sons," same as Mannfred, noted for being absolutely psychotic, kind of an idiot, and not very talented in magic and being more of a melee powerhouse. He's long dead by the events of TW:WH, having been chopped apart by forces sent from both the Dwarfs and The Empire. On the other hand he's an 8th edition character with rules, he had a unique model on tabletop, and CA has seen fit to put three quotes from him into the game. None of these are from the 8th edition Vampire Counts army book either, I suspect they're lifted from some of the novels about Vlad.

loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_khalida_neferata_01$ And every time, she sends with them a token of her affection, one cousin to another. A lock of her hair, a book of poems by a philosopher of our acquaintance, the crown of Lahmia taken from her husband’s head, the amulet of Asaph stolen from my crypt, or... a sword she used to shed my blood.
Loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_khalida_neferata_02™ They come from the sea, and the sky and Great Desert, from the jungles and the mountains. They pour forth in a limitless tide and they are broken on my walls.

Both of these quotes are by Khalida but are about Neferata, the leader of the Lahmian vampires. Neferata was a background character for most of Warhammer Fantasy's history, only getting rules at the very end during The End Times, though she went on to be a much more important character in Age of Sigmar.

• TOMB KINGS

loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_nekaph_01 Kneel before the might of Settra the Imperishable, Khemrikhara, King of Nehekhara, Lord of the Earth, Monarch of the Sky, Ruler of the Four Horizons, Mighty Lion of the Infinite Desert, Great Hawk of the Heavens, Majestic Emperor of the Shifting Sands, Eternal Sovereign of Khemri's Legions.

Most of the Tomb Kings quotes are about Settra and his many titles, but this one is interesting for who it's by, which is Nekaph, Settra's personal herald and a Legendary Hero in the 8th edition Tomb Kings army book. He's also the only un-implemented Tomb Kings character to get a quote connected to them at all. However, Tomb Heralds were a hero type that never got implemented for the Tomb Kings in their DLC, except as a form of unique Follower that could be obtained through their tech tree. So if Nekaph were to ever show up that would probably have to change first.

• THE EMPIRE

Loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_kurt_helborg_01¯ Reiksguard Knights, your Emperor is calling! Death or glory awaits us, but if we die, we will die as warriors, with swords hand, and there can be no better death than that.

Kurt Helborg was one of the Legendary Lords in the 8th Edition Empire army book, which is where this quote is from. Commander of the Reiksguard, he was a strong melee lord who could only be mounted on a horse.

loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_luthor_huss_01Æ I see a world drowned in fire and plague, where madness is the only reason and death the only respite. That world will soon be ours, unless we fight these hellspawn with every weapon at our command.

Luthor Huss was a named Warrior Priest character from the 8th edition Empire army book, where he was a LEgendary Hero. Interestingly this quote is not from that book. Luthor had at least one novel written about him so I suspect it's lifted from there.

loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_roth_01¦I know you, fiend. You killed my wife, my father, and my only son. You may yet kill me. But by Sigmar, I will drag you and your Undead scum screaming to hell with me!
Loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_roth_02w That damned blood-sucking dog wants us to stay on the outside of his little wall. Reason enough for us to go in, I say.

If Count Noctilus was the main antagonist of Dreadfleet then Jaego Roth was the main protagonist, an old pirate from the Empire who wanted revenge on the vampire. Again, like all the Dreadfleet characters on this list he didn't have proper rules as a character. He did have a magic item that could be used for his ship, his moondial, but that's been implemented in TW:WH as Count Noctilus' only unique magic item, which makes his inclusion seem unlikely.

• UNKNOWN & ANONYMOUS

loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_unknown_03Z The Daemon Forges are warming. Hashut shall wake. More slaves are required. We are coming.

So the above quote is included for one reason only: it's the only example we have of a loading screen quote being a very obvious hint for upcoming content. Obviously the Chaos Dwarfs are already here, but this quote has been in since launch. We know CA might use these quotes to hint at upcoming content. This quote is also not from any published WH book, it's made up for TW and any time we see a quote like that I think the odds are that it's a hint go up considerably. Speaking of...

Loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_unknown_04½ Do any remember how Count Mordrek the Damned came to his fate? Are there any amongst the wise of the Old World who recall which God he served? If such men exist they keep their own counsel.

We talked about Count Mordrek earlier. He gets two quotes in the loading screens, the one from before lifted right out of his original 5th edition appearance, and then this one. As far as I can tell this quote is from nowhere. It's not in "Champions of Chaos" and it's also not in the 8th Edition WoC army book. This one seems to be original to TW, which to me seems very interesting.

Loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_unknown_05¸ He rides upon the Hound of Khorne. He wields the Blood God's Destroyer. Never has he suffered defeat, and his followers call his name after every glorious feat! Arbaal! Arbaal! ARBAAL!

So here's our second quote about Arbaal the Undefeated. Like the first one, as far as I can tell this is a quote original to TW. One quote for this character made up just for the game, sure that could just be flavor. Two quotes? Now I'm suspicious.

8loading_screen_quotes_description_wh3_main_quote_anon_03 Your doom is coming, Man-things.

So I wasn't sure whether to include this one. The quote is from the 7th edition Skaven army book, appearing on the very last page, though in the book it doesn't have the "- anonymous" citation that's in TW. I don't know if that means anything but I suppose it could be considered another hint toward Thanquol.
Anyway, that's everything I found. Hope some of you find it interesting.

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Today's Reading, via Project Gutenberg:
Who has heard of a more horrible discovery than to have gone blind in one's sleep? Is it to be wondered that his courage died, and that the rest of his life was lived between priest and doctor, in terror of death? for he had become a Catholic. Nor were blindness and fear of death all his misfortunes. His wife wearied of Moore Hall, and her sons bored her. Peter was witless; John, the first President of the Irish Republic, was arrested at Athlone and driven along the roads with other rebels to Castlebar. He died in prison. George, the eldest son, a mild, visionary youth, was interested in literature, and was admired and made much of at Holland House, so the Colonel tells me. And without wife or child the last years of the blind man at Moore Hall must have been very sad and lonely. One room was the same as another to him, and with the disappearance of the lake his thoughts returned to Ashbrook, and the little Protestant cemetery near Straid Abbey. He was the last who thought of Ashbrook with affection. My father did not seem to like to speak of the place; he only went there to collect rents, and the same unsentimental errand took me to Ashbrook when I returned from Paris in 1880. Tom Ruttledge and I had driven through Mayo, visiting all my estates, trying to come to terms with the tenants, and at Ashbrook a crowd had followed the car up a boreen, babbling of the disastrous year they had been through: the potato crop had been a failure; there was no diet in them.
The phrase caught on my ear, and I remember well the two-storeyed house standing on a bare hillside. The woods had been felled long ago, all except a few ash-trees left standing in the corner of the field to shelter the cattle from the wind, and the house, having been inhabited by peasants for a long time, presented a sad degradation, a sagging roof, and windows so black that I did not dare to think of the staircase leading to the drawing-room, in which my great-grandmother had stitched that pretty piece of tapestry which is now in the Kensington Museum. Dunne, my tenant, a heavy, surly fellow, whose manners were not engaging (we heard afterwards he was the leader of a notable conspiracy against us), asked us to step inside, but fearing to meet with chickens in the parlour that perhaps still had the ancient paper on its walls, I pleaded that the day was drawing to a close, and asked him if he would be kind enough to take me to my great-grandfather's grave. He turned aside, and the peasants answering for him said:
Sure we will your honour.
So this is the brook, I thought to myself, and watched the water trickle through masses of weeds and rushes. We crossed some fields and came to a ruined chapel, and my peasants pointed to an incised stone let into the wall, the loneliest grave it seemed to me in all the world; and drowsing in my armchair, unable to read, the sadness that I had experienced returned to me, and I felt and saw as I had done thirty years before. I had thought then of the poor old man who had built Moore Hall deciding at last that his ashes were to be carried to Ashbrook. But the Colonel, I said, mentions Straid Abbey as the burial-place of Captain George Moore and his descendants, and the little ruined chapel that was shown to me can't be Straid Abbey.
A few days afterwards another letter came from the Colonel replying to my reproaches that his answers to my questions were vague and insufficient, and from this letter I learnt that my great-grandfather's misfortunes did not cease with his death. He had left instructions in his will that he wished to be buried with his ancestors in the little Protestant cemetery near Straid Abbey. The Colonel had discovered it half a mile down the road, after having searched Straid Abbey vainly for the tomb of Captain George Moore, and his letter told me how he had had some difficulty in pushing his way through a mass of briars and hemlock and in finding the inscription among the ruins of the church; but he had found it.
So it was there that my great-grandfather had wished to be buried, but he was buried at Ashbrook in a Catholic chapel. By mistake, the Colonel says in his letter. By mistake! I cried. Any breach of faith were better than that he should be laid with his Protestant forebears. The Irish Spaniard, Catholic, back, belly, and sides, would not have hesitated to ignore her husband's instructions. She must have come from London, for George the historian, an Agnostic like his master Gibbon, would have buried his father as the will directed, if he had not been overcome by his mother, who, of course, would like to conceal the fact that she had married a man of such certain Protestantism that at the last he had chosen to be buried in a Protestant cemetery.[3] I should like to know who was at this funeral, and if the historian came over from London to attend it or remained gadding about Holland House, or courting Louisa Browne, whom he afterwards married in spite of the fact that it was her uncle or her brother who secured the conviction of John Moore, the historian's brother. That marriage would have added another grief to the old merchant's many griefs.
A portrait of Louisa hangs in the dining-room, and she appears in it as a voluptuous young woman wrapped in gauze, and by her hangs the portrait of her uncle, Lord Altamont, a copy of the portrait by Reynolds in Westport House. Both are indifferent works, but there is a good picture in the dining-room at Moore Hall, a portrait of my grandfather painted in 1836, certainly not earlier, and therefore not a Raeburn. Nor is it a Catterson Smith, who was painting at that time in Dublin, for his thick, heavy touch is nowhere visible in grandfather's portrait. The drawing is sure, almost unconscious, revealing an old man with white hair growing scantily about a high forehead, and though no books are in the background, we divine a library and a life sheltered from every misfortune. Who could have painted the portrait? Wilkie, perhaps. He was painting about that time. But there are few life-size portraits by Wilkie, and in none that I have seen is the drawing so thoughtful, nor does he show much interest in character except in this portrait. He seems to have said in it all that my grandfather tells us about himself in his preface to the French Revolution. A very remarkable portrait, no doubt, and for a long time I sat struggling with an idea that would not come into a phrase: that the picture and the preface might be compared to the music and words, opera and libretto, something like that. But it would not come, and I got up and took the preface out of the drawer.
PREFACE TO MY HISTORICAL MEMOIRS OF THE FRENCH REVOLUTION, TO BE PUBLISHED AFTER MY DEATH.
August 20, 1837.
I, this day, complete my sixty-fourth year. I have for some time been engaged in a history of the French Revolution. I early in life began collecting books on this subject, and they now fill up an entire side of my very pretty library in this beautiful place. They are most of them bad in style, and worse in spirit and sentiment. There are few of them which I could endure reading were it not for the task I have laid down for myself. This task has the effect of giving interest to the most wretched productions. Any book which offers me a choice of a new fact, or the solution of any difficulty attached to old facts, interests me, and I find amusement in examining it. Amusement and the banishment of what the French call ennui are my principal objects. Beautiful as this place is, and much as I love it, I confess I have not always been able to exclude ennui from its precincts. There are hours in which I have not been able to keep it away; general vague reading, without any specific object, afforded me no protection against it, but since I have sat down to my task I scarcely have known what it is. I have a rough copy carried on nearly to the present time. To every written page I have left a blank one, in which I put down any new facts or reflections or news. I wish to go on for some time longer in this manner. But my age, as mentioned at the head of this preface, admonishes me there is no time to be lost if I wish the public ever to have an insight into my history. My rough copy with alternate blank pages it is impossible for any one to make anything of, and it is not till after my death I wish my history to appear, not in the form in which my rough copy exhibits it.
I have several times published, but never with any success, so that I am tired of publication in my lifetime. Besides, as I foresee my history will be pretty voluminous, I do not like the trouble of superintending the proofs. As I am a man of fortune, I leave by my will five hundred pounds to defray the expenses of publication. As the publication is in this manner ordered and appointed by me in my testamentary deposition, no one who survives me will be answerable for anything it contains. I foresee many things I say will give offence, but my objects are truth and my country. As amusement was my great object in undertaking this task, it may be said I have already gained my end in never knowing ennui since I began it. But having written a history of the French Revolution, impregnated with all the feelings and sentiments of an Englishman, and written in a style, I hope, purely and thoroughly English, I am ambitious it should be read after me. I have had no celebrity in my life. But a prospect of this posthumous fame pleases me at this moment. I may say with Erasmus: Illud certe praesagio, de meis lucubrationibus, qualescumque sunt, candidius, judicaturam posteritatem, though I cannot add with him: Tametsi nec de meo seculo queri possum. Having missed the applause, and even notice, of my age, I ought, perhaps, to be indifferent about the opinions of those that follow; their applause, should I ever gain it, will not reach me when the grave has closed over me. This is true; but we are so made that while we are living we think with pleasure that we shall not be forgotten after our deaths. The nature of this feeling is beautifully expressed by Fielding in a passage which Gibbon has transcribed in the account of his own life. What adds to my wish that my history should be read after my death is that I am convinced no account of the great event of the French Revolution in all its parts will be fair and impartial coming from a Frenchman, none certainly will do justice to my country. I am anxious to have the merits of the Duke of Wellington duly appreciated as having done more in war than any captain that ever existed. He entered on the contest with more disadvantages on his side, as will be explained in the history. He had greater difficulties to encounter, and arrived at more glorious results. Though not a Frenchman, I am perfectly acquainted with the French language, and there are few Frenchmen better informed with respect to the history, literature, and what are called the statistics of France than I am, so that I conceive myself perfectly well qualified, as much as any Frenchman, for the task I have undertaken. In this improved copy which I am now transcribing, I break the history into chapters, with a view to the grouping of the facts of which it consists. It is this which I call grouping that distinguishes the task of the historian from that of the annotist, and there is no point of greater importance in a history than the manner in which this grouping is executed. The deficiencies of some celebrated historians in this particular may be noticed....
How abruptly it breaks off! Some pages must have been mislaid! and I sought among the litter in the drawer, and finding none, returned to my armchair full of regret that grandfather had not written a biography instead of a history, for such sincerity, such simplicity, such humility, are qualities that are rarely met with except in masterpieces. Some writers, it is true, have adopted humility as a literary artifice, but grandfather is not aware that he is humble; his prose dreams and unfolds like clouds going by. In speaking of Moore Hall I might have said that it stood on a pleasant green hill, with woods following the winding lake, and attributed the melancholy of the people to their mountains, but my grandfather merely says, In this beautiful place, and the reader's imagination is free to remember the place that has seemed to him the most beautiful. Grandfather is able to accept his own failure without attributing it to circumstances, writing that if his history should gain the applause of those that come after him, it would not matter to him, the grave having closed over him. But we are so made that while we live we think with pleasure that we shall not be forgotten after our death. This feeling, he adds modestly, has been beautifully transcribed in Gibbon's account of his own life. For this modesty and for many other reasons I love my grandfather, and like to think of his life flowing on uneventfully for three or four more years in the pretty library, and then his ashes being carried to Kiltoome, where the applause of the world can never reach him.... But by what right do I publish his preface without his history, perhaps perturbing his rest, for we are not sure that the dead cannot hear us. The Colonel, who has inherited his grandfather's taste for history, should edit the French Revolution. He began reading it, and finding it entertaining, he gave me the preface, remarking that our grandfather had managed to escape notice even in his own house, which was indeed the case. Our mother used to say that when his wife opened the door of his library to consult him, or to make pretence of consulting him regarding the management of his property, he would answer, My dear Louisa, all that you do is right, and on these words the old man would drop back into his meditations.
One's first memory is generally of one's mother, but my grandmother was the first human being that came into my consciousness, a crumpled lady of sixty-five, who introduced me to gingerbread nuts, which, however, she did not allow me to eat. And this incident may have impressed her upon my mind; but now I come to think of it my second memory is of her. She fell one day as she was coming downstairs, and I remember William Mullowney and Joseph Applely carrying her to her room, and from that day onward she lived in two rooms in the charge of nurses, carried out on fine days in a sort of sedan chair. And not only my first and second memories, but my third is of her. I remember my father sitting at a small table writing letters by the bed on which his mother lay. He never spoke of her afterwards. And to me it seems strange not to speak of those we love, but that was my father's way. He never spoke of his mother or his brother Augustus, whom he loved next to his mother, and when I asked him about what books my grandfather had written, he answered, Some histories, leaving me in doubt if he had ever read one of them. But he must have looked into the huge manuscript, for five hundred pounds were left for its publication, and he should have edited it. But my father did not appreciate the old gentleman who wrote histories in the room overlooking the lake; he liked his mother, and all the charming letters that he wrote from school were sent to her, and it was to her, and not to his father, that he sent his Latin and English verses, for between sixteen and seventeen he seems to have had literary ambitions. But as soon as he went to Cambridge he became interested in horses, hounds, and a lady whom he met at Bath. All this the Colonel will write excellently well in his life of our father, for he seems to understand our father's character, though he hardly knew him, and shows a surprising appreciation of the antagonism which arose between mother and son as soon as the son had left school. Our father had inherited his character from her (perhaps that is why he loved her), an obstinate, impetuous character, and he had also inherited from her a taste for letter-writing which followed him through life to the very end, and the letters that mother and son exchanged about the debts the son incurred at Cambridge and about the lady that he wished to marry are very violent, and every quarrel was followed by a violent reconciliation. A time of great storm and stress rolled on until he felt that another quarrel with his mother would be more than he could bear, so he went away to Russia, journeying through the Caucasus, getting to Asia Minor, how, I know not, meditating on the nothingness of things and on suicide as a respite from the torture of existence. His diary breaks off suddenly, to be taken up again two years after; all we know of these two years is that they were spent in the company of a man and his wife ... no doubt the lady he met at Bath, who married soon after my father's flight, and travelled with her husband in the East.
The gentlemen of 1830 all had Byronic adventures, I said, and fell to thinking of the illegitimate daughter that was born to him. My mother told my sister that she had seen the lady; my father had pointed her out, saying, She is my daughter. She married and died childless, an old woman, not very long ago, and it seems a pity, and rather harsh, that we should never have met, for it is quite probable that I might have liked her better than my legitimate relation. There can be no doubt that we should have been great friends, and I pondered the charm of an illegitimate relation, especially a sister, and my father whom I did not recognise in the avowal he is reported to have made to his wife. A reticent man he was, especially reticent about the dead, loquacious only about his journey to the East.... It was probably the part of his life that was most real to him.
After dinner Joseph Applely always brought up tea to the summer room, and my father drank a large cup sitting by a round rosewood table, on which stood a Moderator lamp; and that he did not eat bread and butter or cake with his tea never ceased altogether to surprise me. After tea my mother read a novel in an armchair, and as soon as my toys ceased to interest me I clambered on my father's knee and begged him to tell me stories about the desert and the oases where the caravan had rested on its journey from Palestine to Egypt. My father had been obliged to go to Egypt to get permission to measure the Dead Sea and to survey the coasts, and I listened round-eyed to the tale of how the guides, discovering that the Christian dogs were chalking out the way along the passages inside the Pyramid, threatened to extinguish the torches. His voyage down the Nile was a great delight to me, and between the age of six and seven I was quite familiar with the Blue Nile and the White Nile, and had many times mourned the death of a monkey. The poor little fellow tumbled out of the tree, and putting his hand to his side looked up so plaintively that my father declared that for nothing in the world would he shoot another monkey. The story that I liked best was the bringing of the boat from Joppa on the backs of mules to the Dead Sea, and not satisfied with knowing the story myself, I wished everybody else to hear it, and very often embarrassed my father by insisting that he should tell his visitors that the mules could only totter a few hundred yards, so heavy was the boat, and then had to be changed, and that he had let down eighteen hundred feet of line without touching bottom, the water being so dense that the lead would not sink any farther. And I took care that he should not skip the account of the storm that had arisen and the great fright of the Arabs at the waves; or the explanation that on any other sea except the Dead Sea the boat would certainly have been wrecked. But the best story of all was of a man whom he met walking about some world-renowned ruins with a hammer in his hand. Standing before a statue he would say, You've had that nose on your face for many thousand years, in one second you'll have it no longer. Whack! and away went the nose. No sooner had he finished the tale than he had perforce to tell the story of the merchant who used to go out at nightfall to seek European travellers, and if he saw one who looked as if he had money to spend, he would approach him and whisper in his ear that he if came up a by-street with him he would show him a real Khorassan blade. The celebrated smithies of Damascus had been removed to Khorassan, and the Khorassan blades were being imitated for the European market, and one day the merchant related that he was no longer put to the expense of having new ones made. He had agents in Paris and London, and whenever these imitation swords came into the market they were purchased for small sums and sent out again to be sold after nightfall for large prices. If you can let me have one of these blades, my father answered, I should like to take it home. No, said the crafty Persian, I have none left, but I have a real Khorassan blade which I should very much like to sell you.
Khorassan or imitation I know not, but many swords, scimitars, and daggers were brought back, and Arab bridles looking like instruments of torture; and these were kept in a great press in my nursery, which I was forbidden to open. But a child cannot be gainsaid on his birthday, and my dearest wish was gratified when I was dressed as a Turk, and rode about the estate flourishing a Khorassan blade above the head of my pony. The success of the ride encouraged me to pursue my inquiries into Eastern costumes and customs, and my father's diaries were examined—not the text, that was too difficult for a child, but the camels with which the text was embellished. His eyes were keen, and with a lead pencil, hard and sharp enough to have won all Ruskin's admiration, he followed the long, shaggy, birdlike necks, the tufted and callous hides, and the mobile lips of these bored ruminants, the nonconformists of the four-footed world. The Arab horse never seems to have once tempted his pencil; and it is difficult to find a reason, for he must have had some wonderful horses. He used to tell me of a journey from Jerusalem to Jeddo in a single day; the horse was very tired at the end of it, but he pricked up his ears and began to trot as soon as he caught sight of the town.
The only portrait of a horse that he ever attempted was a large water-colour of Anonymous—a very painstaking piece of work, of which he was a little ashamed, I think, preferring to turn the conversation from the drawing to the race itself. The horse was going very well when he turned a shoe. I wanted him to say that the horse would have won had it not been for the accident, but I could not get him to say that, and remember going to Joseph Applely, a taciturn, clandestine little man whom there is no necessity to describe here, for he is described in Esther Waters under the name of John Randal, to find out the truth—whether Anonymous would have won the Liverpool if he had not turned a shoe. He had done some riding himself, and was disposed to be critical, and he thought—well, it is difficult to remember exactly his criticism of my father's riding, for he had a habit of dropping his voice and muttering to himself in his shirt-collar, mumbling and turning suddenly to his press, that wonderful press in which all things could be found. It was out of that press that Esther Waters came, out of the stable-yard and out of my own heart.
Oscott College had demonstrated, to the satisfaction of my unhappy parent, that it was impossible to teach me to write a clean, intelligible letter, and in despair he allowed me to apply myself to the study of life. At Moore Hall there was no life except the life of the stable-yard, and to it I went with the same appetite with which I went to the life of the studio afterwards; if I had remained at Moore Hall I certainly should have ridden many steeplechases, and perhaps succeeded in doing what my father had failed to do. A pretty indulgence it would be for me now, sitting here, surrounded by Impressionist pictures, to look back upon the day at Liverpool when the flag fell and we raced for the bit of hard ground, numbers of us coming down at the first fence, myself, however, escaping a fall, and then away off into the country ... three miles, over how many fences? And then the jump into the racecourse and the three-quarters of a mile over hurdles. A pretty memory all that long way would have been for a man who has written a line of books, and I should certainly have had some such memory to play with if my father could have restrained himself from asking the electors of Mayo to send him to Parliament to ride for Repeal of the Union. They answered that they would; the horses were sold, and my dream of doing on Slievecarn what my father had hoped to do on Anonymous died in South Kensington, where we had taken a small house at the corner of Alfred Place, opposite South Kensington Station, a pleasant suburb then, thinly populated.
The Exhibition Road was building, and it was at the corner of Prince's Gardens that we met Jim Browne, the painter of the Crucifixion that hangs in Carnacun Chapel, in the roof high above the altar. I can remember him painting in the breakfast-room, and Tom Kelly coming to stand for the figure of Christ. The angels on either side of the cross Jim had painted no doubt out of his head; I had often wondered how he had been able to paint them, and the great picture that my father used to describe to me in the summer room, the great picture entitled the Death of an Indian Chief, a tribe of Indians reining up their horses at the edge of the precipice over which the horse bearing the dead chieftain springs madly into space. The day we met him in the Exhibition Road Jim told my father that he and his sisters were living in Prince's Gardens; he invited us to come and see his pictures on the following Sunday, and during the intervening days I could neither think nor speak of anything but Jim Browne, asking my father all the while why Jim was not the greatest painter in the world since he had painted a tribe of Indians; how many pictures? fifty, sixty, a hundred? He did not think they were so many. Twenty, thirty, forty? And if he could paint so many, why will not the Academy hang his pictures? Are the pictures he paints now not as good as the Death of an Indian Chief? My father suggested that Jim did not finish his pictures sufficiently for the Academy, and tried to explain to me that Jim's drawing was defective. But it was difficult for me then to understand that a man might paint a tribe of Indians reining up their horses at the edge of a precipice and yet not be able to draw, and in bed at night I lay awake thinking, waiting for the day to come.
Father, where is Prince's Gardens? Is it the first turning or the second? Do you think you will be able to persuade Jim Browne to use models? And if he does, will the Academy accept his picture in May?

When Bridgerton season 2 came out, I wrote a rather long post about "All the things I hated about season 2". After watching QC I think it's only fair if I now praise what I think was a masterpiece.
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Acting:
Yes, yes and yes again! Corey and India did a splendid job. Correct me if I'm wrong but I feel like India had the same mannerisms as the older QC. Sam Clemmett as Brimsley, Tunji Kasim as Adolphus, Michelle Fairley as princess Agusta and Aresma Thomas as lady Danbury were magnificent. This was a team effort.
The writing:
Was mostly amazing. The main plot was flawless. I can't fault it in any way, shape or form. I was a bit worried at the end, when George somewhat recovered after sending the unethical doctor away and stayed with Charlotte. There was the chance that it would send the wrong message that "Love can solve everything- even mental illness" but I think the fact that the king was still struggling afterwards corrected the message. Love and support helps, it helps a lot but no matter how much you love and give in the end of the day it can't serve as a medicine for everything.
As for the side plots
**The great experiment-**I think they did a decent job with "the great experiment" side plot. The back and forth between Lady D. and Princess Agusta was pretty fleshed out. Lady D.'s efforts to have her husband accepted, even though he was a tool, were heartwarming. All and all, it didn't make things awkward, it fit the rest of the story like a piece to a puzzle and I think it actually strengthened season 1's plot surrounding Simon and his father.
The heir crisis- I appreciate it but at the same time feel like it could be better developed. It kind of disappointed me that the princes and princesses were portrayed as comic relief. I understand that the series was depressing in itself and needed some humor but I think if the children were a tad less caricaturistic, the scene were George IV and the princess royal confront their mother would be stronger.
Brimsley and Reynolds- 5/5 stars. It reminds me of Bill and Frank from TLOS.
Lady D. and Lord Ledger- I understand what Shonda was going for, still I feel like considering what is to come in the future Bridgerton series, this feels kind of incesty. You know how there is a running joke about how the Karjenners date the same pool of people and they have no boundaries? This kind of reminded me of that. Also an affair is still an affair even if you're wife is a ragging racist. And sticking up for POC then using that as a gateway to have an affair with that person of color only to pull "Oops i kind of forgot that I had a family and daughter" after you smashed is the least romantic thing to exist. Burn the birthday hat Lady D. lol.
The production- Everything was 1000/10. The dances were just *chef's kiss*. I just have to add this, since there has been a discourse around the fact that this spin-off is better than the original series, I think the balls held in season one are still superior.
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In the end I want to pray that season 3 will be as good as QC and that there is no squeal to QC. I just feel like we left the story in such a great point that if we try to come back to it, it will ruin the masterpiece that we have.

Is anyone else worried about how many plot lines season 3 is going to have? I mean we already know there’s going to be
-Penelope and Colin’s love story (obviously)
-Eloise and Penelope’s conflict and her new friend
-Violet and Danbury’s new conflict (from queen charlotte)
-Violet’s new love interest?
-More of Queen Charlotte and Penelope’s conflict and just Lady Whistledown as a whole
-Whatever Benedict’s storyline will be this season (if he’s next it has to be decently big)
-Francesca meeting her future husband
-Featheringtons family drama
-Anthony and Kate crumbs? (idk if this counts bc tbh I do not expect much)
I think what worked in Queen Charlotte over Bridgerton is that despite only having six episodes they only focused on three plot lines George/Charlotte, Danbury, and Reynolds/Brimsley so the story felt more whole. In Bridgerton we have to deal with multiple plot lines running at once taking away from the main story (which was the main issue of season 2). I have hope but I really am beginning to think season 3 is going to have more of the primary problem of season 2….

To set the scene for Paul Welton, I’m nabbing the first part of this from another post I wrote about Rebecca’s relationship with her dad. Paul was, by most accounts we've heard (with the exception of Rebecca's), a good man.
In “No Weddings and a Funeral” (S2, E10), Ted is leaving Deborah’s house after Paul's funeral and he says to her and Rebecca:
“I know I only got to meet Mr. Welton that one time, but the fact that a fella his age could still do every move from Donald O'Connor's big old dance scene from Singin' in the Rain, it just gave me a lot of hope for getting older, you know.”
Another account of Paul's character comes from the priest who speaks at his funeral:
“Normally I would have to fib about how well I knew the deceased. But in this case, I did know Paul very well. He came to church every weekend, sitting right over there, paying attention to every single word of the Richmond match he was listening to on his phone. But I never felt the need to chide Paul about this. It was a sign of his passion, for his beloved sport and the commitment he showed to his team. They're the same passion and commitment which he showed both as a husband and a father to his family as well.”
Paul wasn’t always faithful to the church but he was good enough. He may have listened to the match on his phone once or twice at church, but he still made the effort to come along and the priest appreciated that. The priest’s views about Paul very much echo Deborah’s views, who described said this about him: “He wasn't perfect. I didn't need him to be. He always came back.” He was unfaithful to Deborah, but he still loved her very much.
Paul on the whole seems warm-hearted and well liked. He danced, liked giving environmentally friendly gifts, and people generally spoke about him in a positive way, but he wasn't faithful to the church and wasn't faithful to Deborah. Still, he was honest to the priest and honest to Deborah, and they accepted and forgave him for his flaws.
But he wasn't honest with Rebecca. After Rebecca tells her mother the story of when she and Sassy walked in on his father cheating on her with Mrs Reynolds, Rebecca says, "And the next day, when I came back, he said nothing about it. And that is why I'm so fucking angry, okay?"
Paul did something so unforgivable to Rebecca who didn't deserve it. It seems they had a strong bond before the incident, with Deborah saying he liked two things, "attention, and making Rebecca laugh".
Rebecca meant the world to him, and Paul didn't want to reveal to her the worst parts about himself. There's even more cheating that Rebecca doesn't know about, as implied by Deborah when she said to Rebecca, "I know about his cheating. All of it." Paul thinks that coming clean about himself will absolutely crush his daughter, and he is afraid to do it.
And because Paul has never apologised, never asked Rebecca for forgiveness, she has never forgiven him for what he's done, even though he may have been an otherwise great father. But it seems like Rebecca had a great relationship with her dad before the incident occurred.
I theorise that Rupert and Paul personally knew and hated each other. Their characters are polar opposites. Rupert is cold-hearted, snobby and exclusive, likes putting people down, making them the worst versions of themselves. To quote Deborah, "he's a self-righteous shit". Paul was warm-hearted and inclusive, likes pulling people up, making them the best versions of themselves. To quote Deborah, "he was a good father, a wonderful husband".
After Rebecca walked in on her dad cheating on her mum and he never acknowledged it, Rebecca developed such a hatred for her dad that all of his traits, even his good ones, became intolerable to her.
So my theory is that Rebecca married Rupert to get back at her dad because her dad hated Rupert. And Rupert wanted to marry Rebecca to get back at Paul, the man he hates. Rebecca and Rupert's marriage, from both sides, was done out of hatred towards Paul rather than out of love for one another, so it obviously wasn't going to work out.
Rebecca discovered out that Rupert was also a cheater, which is the exact thing Rebecca hated her dad for, so her hatred towards Rupert is now at the same level as her hatred towards her father.
So to get back at Rupert, Rebecca took control of the one thing he really loved: AFC Richmond. She wanted to destroy the club, so she brought in an American football manager that had gone viral on the internet that reminded Rebecca of her dad, because that's the one thing that Rupert hates as much as Rebecca. And Rebecca hates him too. “He's intolerable, isn't he?", she tells Higgins in the "Pilot" episode.
I think that Ted reminds Rebecca of her dad. He is warm-hearted, wholesome and inclusive. He wants to help people become the best versions of themselves. He loves attention, he loves to make Rebecca laugh. And Rebecca loves her dad, aside from his cheating, which she overwhelmingly hates. But that's not visible in Paul’s personality. Rebecca brings Ted in because he reminds her of her dad and she finds her dad intolerable.
But then she ends up growing fond of Ted's personality, grows fond of someone who helps her become the best version of herself. As Rebecca gets to know Ted, she finds out that Ted’s wife was the one cheating on him. Ted is so much like Paul in so many ways, but Paul is a cheater, and Ted has been cheated on.
You can't always tell which kinds of people would cheat on their partner. You've just got to fall in love with someone so wonderful, and make them feel wonderfully the same way about you, that you would never dream of cheating on one another.
And Rebecca has found this in Ted.
Though the last part is my prediction, Sam Obisanya and the Dutch houseboat guy are both warm-hearted and inclusive as well. The Dutch guy also claims that his wife cheated on him. While I do think Ted and Rebecca will end up together, there are of course other options for Rebecca. It doesn’t have to be Ted, it just has to be someone wonderful and honest.
I just think Ted will have a similar parallel with his own dad. To go off on a bit of a tangent, I think Ted’s dad also felt guilty about his own love affairs and he took it out on himself. Ted is a forgiving person, but he has never forgiven his father for this, until perhaps the funeral episode where he spoke with Dr Sharon. "He was a good man", Ted admits to Dr Sharon. He cared about other people, exemplified by staying up all night reading Johnny Tremain for his son.
But back to Paul, I think that he and Rupert had some beef with each other in the past. Perhaps they were old friends, maybe they were business associates that had a falling out. Would it even be too much of a stretch to speculate that Paul Welton was AFC Richmond's previous owner before Rupert took over in 1987? If so, you can see a photo of him at 11:34 in the "Pilot" episode, but I can't make out the name underneath the photo. He would be the young gentleman in the framed top left photo, and the third owner of AFC Richmond since they were formed in 1897.
"My, my, aren't you a salty bunch? But I can't remember the last time the press room was this full. Yet here you all are. Maybe you're not such a mad notion after all. And despite the number of you here, there is not a single person in this room who has seen Richmond play more than I have."
Rebecca and Rupert were married for 12 years. We don't know how long they were dating before that, but it could have been a few more years. But to say there is not a single person in the press room who has seen Richmond play more than Rebecca is quite a statement, considering the room is filled with football journalists who will, like Rebecca, watch Richmond play week in, week out, and some of them will have done so for 20+ years, I'd imagine.
Has Rebecca seen Richmond play every week since she was a child because her dad owned Richmond? Once Rupert took over, did he ban Paul from seeing Richmond play live, so he had to resort to listening to their games on his phone instead? We know he texted Nate "Sorry about Ted being there today. Won't happen again". Did he ban Paul from Nelson Road as well?
If this was the case, selling the club to Rupert in 1987 might have prompted Rebecca's family to move to a different town which would tie in with Sassy's story of when they met.
"I remember the day she moved into our town. She was already taller than me, had bigger boobs. Family was rich. So, first day of year seven, I told everyone her nickname was "Stinky"."
This would make Rebecca 11 or 12 years old in 1987. She'd have been 15 or 16 years old on 13th September 1991 when she walked in on her dad and Mrs Reynolds. 1987 seems to be around the same time that Rebecca moved to a new town.
"Never Gonna Give You Up" by Rick Astley was released in 1987. Paul was forced to sell AFC Richmond, but he was never going to stop supporting them, they're still always in his heart. Was this a special song to Paul? Was it the song that kept him going during such a rough time?
Did the whole AFC Richmond team turn up to his funeral, not only to support Rebecca, but to support Paul, Richmond's former owner, someone they all owe so much to?
And finally, re-watching "No Weddings and a Funeral", Rupert has the audacity to turn up to Paul's funeral. Of course when we watch it the first time, we think that he's just being disrespectful to Rebecca. But if he and Paul hated each other, then it's really rubbing salt into the wound.
Rupert: "My sincerest condolences."
Rebecca: "Didn't think you were coming."
Rupert: "Rebecca, Paul was family."
Rebecca: "No, I mean because you weren't invited."
Deborah: "It's lovely to see you, Rupie."
Paul was family. Obviously not family by blood, otherwise it'd Rebecca wouldn't have married him, but it suggests there was some kind of tie that bound Rupert and Paul together, though not in a good way, because Rupert was not invited.
At the end of the funeral, Rebecca tells Rupert, "thank you so much for coming. Dad would've loved you being here". This is after Deborah had spoken to Rebecca, "the best way to deal with people like that is to make sure they know they can't get to you".
Paul would have hated Rupert being at his funeral.

I feel torn about Queen Charlotte. I respect the work that went into it. I genuinely enjoyed some aspects. But I wouldn’t watch it again. I think the show oversteps into tragedy and becomes actively traumatic at times.
Edit: I think QC might be a drama, not a romance. Romances aren’t typically this brutal or bleak in tone. I think that’s my major disconnect. I expected a bittersweet romance, but I got a dark romantic drama.
Love:

• Young Queen Charlotte’s portrayal was fantastic. She perfectly captured the Queen we knew from season 1-2.
• Young King George. Wow, “hopelessly smitten” is a great look on a great-looking man. I loved his sweet, adoring, bashful smiles. He looked at her with complete awe.
• Charlotte and George were well-cast and had great chemistry.
• Initial meeting was adorable.
• I loved the scene in episode 4 where Reynolds tells George that Charlotte might a perfect match for him. George has the teeniest, happiest little smile while he says hopefully, “You think?” ROMANCE, PEOPLE. I FEEL THE SWEET FEELS.
• George’s love confession was 100% swoon-worthy. The actor hit it out of the park here with the emotion in his face and voice. Very romantic. ❤️
• The ending was sweet. I liked how older Queen Charlotte knew just how to communicate with George and make him feel safe and comfortable. She accepted George for who he was and didn’t see him as broken, defective, or any less worthy of love.

Hate with a burning passion:

• Overuse of torture scenes. I was sick to my gut having to watch, what, 10 scenes of George being tortured? Some of the scenes accomplished a plot point (shedding light on the doctor’s true character, for example) and furthered the story. Most didn’t. It felt like torture porn. I did, in no way, appreciate seeing a mentally ill man be brutally tortured for multiple episodes.
• Charlotte took too long to save the king from his torture cellar. It felt out of character considering she’d already burst into his observatory earlier. IDK how long it was, but pregnant Charlotte went from not showing to showing. One month, two, three? Again, why is the show subjecting George to even more torture?
• SA scenes. Copious, brutal, unnecessary. Every Lady Danbury scene did not need to include a new fresh way for her husband to assault her. It was horrific to watch. After the first scene, it no longer accomplished any plot progression.
• The editing, especially in episode 5, was truly terrible. They were quick-cutting from Charlotte rescuing George from a torture cellar to… Lady Danbury looking for a paper hat that her fuck buddy made decades ago? What the hell? The editing gave me (and poor George) literal whiplash.
• To all of episode 5, I’d say “electric chair,” except if they had electric chairs in that time period, THE WRITERS WOULD HAVE PUT GEORGE IN IT, for God’s sake, kill me now and end my misery.

Dislike:

• Reynolds. He cared for the king, yes, but he never redeemed himself in my eyes. He tried to stop the doctor once, but was thrown out of the room. He never tried again. He could have gone to Brimsley or Charlotte, but he didn’t.
• Lady Danbury’s affair with Violet’s dad. It’s weird. I don’t like it. Could have picked anyone else.
• Lord Ledger staring at Lady Danbury at the funeral. I’m sorry, but he looked like a creep. Stop leering. She’s in mourning, you horn dog.
• Violet’s present-day sexual awakening was random and not well-integrated into the plot. It didn’t fit thematically. It went nowhere. And again, it happened in an episode where the male lead is being tortured. We cut from torture to Violet frothing at the mouth for a footman. It doesn’t make sense.
• Young Lady Danbury is a great actress, but she didn’t capture older LD at all. I didn’t see or hear any of her trademark mannerisms. I thought that was odd considering young Queen Charlotte did such a good job capturing her older counterpart.
• The goddamn speculum scene. I felt my vagina shrivel up inside my body. I don’t want to watch a speculum exam during a romance. I don’t want to be reminded that speculums are largely unchanged since they were first developed and forcibly used on enslaved black women. I don’t want to be reminded how little the field of medicine cares about female pain, then and even now.
• Why create an alternate Bridgerton reality where slavery doesn’t exist but homophobia does? Just, why?
• Edit: They repeated the same story beat with Brimsley and Reynolds too much. Same argument, same dialogue, multiple times. “You’re keeping things from me.” “Go away.” After a certain point, it didn’t progress the plot, and it got predictable and boring.
• Edit: They basically desegregated on accident. Because they didn’t know Charlotte would be “so brown.” Are you kidding me? It happened on a whim, so Augusta could save face? Ludicrous.
• Edit: George was likely tortured for weeks or months, and he insta-recovered. One bath, one meal, I guess that’s all you need to overcome severe trauma.

I think Reynolds is still serving the King at Kew. And that Brimsley went to him after the Queen went to see the King at the end of the season.
It ties back to Brimsley's convo with the Queen that he is alone because everyone (Reynolds) serves the king, but Brimsley serves the queen. And to Reynolds and Brimsley's talk in the bath; if their king and queen grow old together, then they could too.
I think this spinoff was about duty and bittersweet love.

• George's duty to be perfect king, Charlotte's duty to her husband (including ensuring his lineage), and of course their love
• Agatha's freedom from her duties and her love for Lord Ledger
• Brimsley's and Reynolds' work duties and their inability to be together properly
• Violet's lost husband

In “No Weddings and a Funeral” (S2, E10), Ted is leaving Deborah’s house after her husband's funeral and he says to her and Rebecca:
“I know I only got to meet Mr. Welton that one time, but the fact that a fella his age could still do every move from Donald O'Connor's big old dance scene from Singin' in the Rain, it just gave me a lot of hope for getting older, you know.”
Firstly, I would love to see the deleted scene of when Ted met Rebecca's dad, what chemistry they had, how they bonded, and to see that old man dancing to "Singing; in the Rain". When and where did they meet and how did it happen?
Before re-watching this episode, I assumed that Rebecca had no relationship with her father and only a distant relationship with her mother, but does this line tell us that Rebecca was actually on speaking terms with her father? Rebecca was definitely present at the meeting, because she replies, "You know, I'd forgotten that. Thank you, Ted." It seems like a sincere response, like it was a happy memory for Rebecca.
Another account of Paul's character comes from the priest who speaks at his funeral:
“Normally I would have to fib about how well I knew the deceased. But in this case, I did know Paul very well. He came to church every weekend, sitting right over there, paying attention to every single word of the Richmond match he was listening to on his phone. But I never felt the need to chide Paul about this. It was a sign of his passion, for his beloved sport and the commitment he showed to his team. They're the same passion and commitment which he showed both as a husband and a father to his family as well.”
Paul wasn’t always faithful to the church but he was good enough. He may have listened to the match on his phone once or twice at church, but he still made the effort to come along and the priest appreciated that. The priest’s views about Paul very much echo Deborah’s views, who described said this about him: “He wasn't perfect. I didn't need him to be. He always came back.” He was unfaithful to Deborah, but he still loved her very much.
Paul on the whole seems warm-hearted and well liked. He danced, liked giving environmentally friendly gifts, and people generally spoke about him in a positive way, but he wasn't faithful to the church and wasn't faithful to Deborah. Still, he was honest to the priest and honest to Deborah, and they accepted and forgave him for his flaws.
But he wasn't honest with Rebecca. After Rebecca tells her mother the story of when she and Sassy walked in on his father cheating on her with Mrs Reynolds (who I reckon is Sassy's mother), Rebecca says, "And the next day, when I came back, he said nothing about it. And that is why I'm so fucking angry, okay?"
Paul did something so unforgivable to Rebecca who didn't deserve it. It seems they had a strong bond before the incident, with Deborah saying he liked two things, "attention, and making Rebecca laugh".
Rebecca meant the world to him, and Paul didn't want to reveal to her the worst parts about himself. There's even more cheating that Rebecca doesn't know about, as implied by Deborah when she said to Rebecca, "I know about his cheating. All of it." He thinks that coming clean will absolutely crush her, and he is afraid to do it.
And because Paul has never apologised, never asked Rebecca for forgiveness, she has never forgiven him for what he's done, even though he may have been an otherwise great father.
Fast forward, she hires Ted to destroy AFC Richmond. He is a good man who's done nothing wrong and doesn't deserve what Rebecca has been doing to him at all. Rebecca has actually grown to really like and care about Ted. But Keeley finds out about Rebecca's scheme and confronts her. Rebecca explains Keeley in "All Apologies" (S1 E9), :
"Imagine doing something unforgivable to someone who doesn't deserve it and then having to look them in the eye and tell them what you've done. What would be the point of telling Ted now? It doesn't change anything."
Rebecca is now in the same position as her dad was, and acts in the same way that he did. Rebecca doesn't want to apologise to Ted because she understands that what she did was unforgivable and thinks apologising will only make things worse. She is scared of what might happen. Ted might quit the team or call the press if she apologises, and she fears her life would be so much worse than it would be by just ignoring the problem.
Keeley eventually convinces Rebecca to apologise. She tells Rebecca that in the past, she also did something unforgivable to her friend, but she apologised and they patched it up. An apology regains respect from the victim and is the right thing to do.
So Rebecca eventually comes clean to Ted, telling him absolutely everything she's done:
"I hired you because I wanted this team to lose. I wanted you to fail, and I sabotaged you every chance I've had. It was me who hired that photographer to take the photo of you and Keeley. I set up the interview with Trent Crimm, hoping that he would humiliate you. And I instigated the transfer of Jamie Tartt, even though you'd asked me not to."
And Ted did the unthinkable: he forgave Rebecca for something she thought was unforgivable. Maybe if Rebecca's dad had been honest and upfront to Rebecca about what had happened, about everything he'd done, then they could have patched things up and had a better relationship.

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt7767422/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_0_tt_8_nm_0_q_sex%2520education
​
The number of episodes the Cast is in in Sex Education S4 hasn't been updated.
But it seems that the following aren't in SE S4:
​
Tanya Reynolds (Lily Iglehart)
Patricia Allison (Ola Nyman)
Mikael Persbrandt (Jakob Nyman)
Jim Howick (Colin Hendricks)
Chris Jenks (Steve Morley)
Chaneil Kular (Anwar Bakshi)
Rakhee Thakrar (Emily Sands)
Simone Ashley (Olivia Hanan)
Sami Outalbali (Rahim)
Anne-Marie Duff (Erin Wiley)
Hannah Waddingham (Sofia Marchetti aka the White mother of Jackson)
Lisa Palfrey (Cynthia aka the manage of Maeve's former caravan park)
George Somner (Joe aka Isaac Goodwin's brother)
Doreene Blackstock (Beatrice Effiong aka Eric Effiong's mother)
Sharon Duncan-Brewster (Roz Marchetti aka the Black mother of Jackson)
Joe Wilkinson (Jeffrey aka the husband of the manager of Maeve's former caravan park)
Jojo Macari (Kyle aka Adam former friend, Aimee's former boyfriend, Speech Guy in SE 3.05)
Deobia Oparei (Mr. Effiong aka Eric's father)
Lino Facioli (Dex Thompson aka Quiz Heads member, small penis guy)
James Purefoy (Remi Milburn)
Indra Ové (Anna aka Maeve's foster mother or adopted mother)
Armin Karima (Malek Amir aka Olivia's boyfriend)
Robyn Holdaway (Layla aka the other nonbinary character in SE S3)
Jason Isaacs (Peter Groff aka Michael Groff's brother)
Edward Bluemel (Sean Wiley)
​
Some of that will be new information for people.

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt7767422/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_0_tt_8_nm_0_q_sex%2520education
​
The number of episodes the Cast is in in Sex Education S4 hasn't been updated.
But it seems that the following aren't in SE S4:
​
Tanya Reynolds (Lily Iglehart)
Patricia Allison (Ola Nyman)
Mikael Persbrandt (Jakob Nyman)
Jim Howick (Colin Hendricks)
Chris Jenks (Steve Morley)
Chaneil Kular (Anwar Bakshi)
Rakhee Thakrar (Emily Sands)
Simone Ashley (Olivia Hanan)
Sami Outalbali (Rahim)
Anne-Marie Duff (Erin Wiley)
Hannah Waddingham (Sofia Marchetti aka the White mother of Jackson)
Lisa Palfrey (Cynthia aka the manage of Maeve's former caravan park)
George Somner (Joe aka Isaac Goodwin's brother)
Doreene Blackstock (Beatrice Effiong aka Eric Effiong's mother)
Sharon Duncan-Brewster (Roz Marchetti aka the Black mother of Jackson)
Joe Wilkinson (Jeffrey aka the husband of the manager of Maeve's former caravan park)
Jojo Macari (Kyle aka Adam former friend, Aimee's former boyfriend, Speech Guy in SE 3.05)
Deobia Oparei (Mr. Effiong aka Eric's father)
Lino Facioli (Dex Thompson aka Quiz Heads member, small penis guy)
James Purefoy (Remi Milburn)
Indra Ové (Anna aka Maeve's foster mother or adopted mother)
Armin Karima (Malek Amir aka Olivia's boyfriend)
Robyn Holdaway (Layla aka the other nonbinary character in SE S3)
Jason Isaacs (Peter Groff aka Michael Groff's brother)
Edward Bluemel (Sean Wiley)
​
Some of that will be new information for people.

Sorry for the hiatus, I’ve been swamped with work and also got distracted writing a short storyfor a contest. But today I’m back with a poem that, despite being written in Victorian England, is sadly becoming topical again, at least here in Iowa, where Kim Reynolds is quietly giving ol’ Pudding Fingers DeSantis a run for his money as the most clownishly evil governor in the country.
Elizabeth Barrett Browning — half of one of the all-time great literary power couples (her husband Robert has influenced writers as diverse as T.S. Eliot, who was deeply impacted by Browning’s use of dramatic monologue, and Stephen King, whose Dark Tower series was inspired by one of the great examples of Browning’s use of that literary device, “Childe Roland to the Dark Tower Came”) — wrote today’s poem, “The Cry of the Children,” in 1843 in response to the report on child labor published by the Royal Commission of Inquiry into Children's Employment in the previous year. The commission interviewed hundreds of people, mostly the child laborers themselves, about not just their work but their education (or lack thereof), diet, religious beliefs, and general day-to-day life. The report moved not just Browning (whose poem, interestingly, was published in the Tory magazine Blackwood’s — it would be nice if we could at least return to journalism that’s not completely polarized and cultureless if child labor is making a comeback, but I’m not holding my breath), but other writers such as Benjamin Disraeli, Elizabeth Glaskell, and, of course, Charles Dickens, to speak out against child labor.
Browning’s poem is a far cry from the Dickensian tales absorbed by pop culture, however. There are no loveable urchins, roguish thieves with hearts of gold, or comically grotesque bourgeoisie, just exactly what it says on the tin: a shockingly earnest expression of the pain and grief of those who had their childhood, and not infrequently their lives, stolen from them by the inhumane machinations of the Industrial Revolution.
The poem wastes no time establishing its subject and tone in the opening quatrain: “Do ye hear the children weeping, O my brothers,/Ere the sorrow comes with years?/They are leaning their young heads against their mothers, —/And that cannot stop their tears.” The poem is metrically irregular throughout, as Browning subordinates form to content to get her urgent political message across — this is not a poem to snap, dance, or tap your foot too. However, the rhyme scheme is consistent throughout the poem (ABABCDCDEFEF), which helps maintain the heightened emotional affect.
Next, Browning paints a picture of young animals in nature: “The young lambs are bleating in the meadows;/The young birds are chirping in the nest;/The young fawns are playing with the shadows;/The young flowers are blowing toward the west.” Fairly standard Romantic imagery, but here the point is not to glorify transcendent nature, but rather to contrast the carefree innocence of these juvenile creatures with with the dangerous, toilsome lives of their human counterparts who “are weeping bitterly!/They are weeping in the playtime of the others,/In the country of the free.” Very interesting that sarcastically referring to the deeply socioeconomically sick imperial power one lives in as “land (or country) of the free” is a tradition that goes back at least 160 years.
The next stanza compares the children not to other young creatures, but old ones. This shows that Browning is no naive utopian — she recognizes that suffering is an inherent part of existence, but that endured by child laborers is not natural; it is entirely preventable and it is in fact deeply immoral that we allow it to happen.
The fourth stanza is one of the most heartbreaking, as the children recount one of their own, Little Alice, who “died last year her grave is shapen/Like a snowball, in the rime.” But, they continue, “If you listen by that grave, in sun and shower,/With your ear down, little Alice never cries;/Could we see her face, be sure we should not know her,/For the smile has time for growing in her eyes.” The implication is made explicit in the devastating final couplet: “It is good when it happens," say the children,/"That we die before our time !"”
In the following stanza, the poet, deeply moved by this sentiment — the stanza begins simply “Alas, the wretched children!” — implores them to flee their drudgery into nature’s healing bosom: “Go out, children, from the mine and from the city —/Sing out, children, as the little thrushes do —/Pluck you handfuls of the meadow-cowslips pretty/Laugh aloud, to feel your fingers let them through!” Note the association of the city, the heart of industry, with the mines, and the contrast of both of them with the pastoral idyll.
The children, however, burned out and jaded well beyond their years, are having none of this, replying:

" Are your cowslips of the meadows
Like our weeds anear the mine ?
Leave us quiet in the dark of the coal-shadows,
From your pleasures fair and fine!
"For oh," say the children, "we are weary,
And we cannot run or leap —
If we cared for any meadows, it were merely
To drop down in them and sleep.
Our knees tremble sorely in the stooping —
We fall upon our faces, trying to go ;
And, underneath our heavy eyelids drooping,
The reddest flower would look as pale as snow.
For, all day, we drag our burden tiring,
Through the coal-dark, underground —
Or, all day, we drive the wheels of iron
In the factories, round and round.
"For all day, the wheels are droning, turning, —
Their wind comes in our faces, —
Till our hearts turn, — our heads, with pulses burning,
And the walls turn in their places
Turns the sky in the high window blank and reeling —
Turns the long light that droppeth down the wall, —
Turn the black flies that crawl along the ceiling —
All are turning, all the day, and we with all ! —
And all day, the iron wheels are droning ;
And sometimes we could pray,
'O ye wheels,' (breaking out in a mad moaning)
'Stop ! be silent for to-day ! ' "

Apologies for the lengthy quote but I find this stretch of the poem deeply moving, and fascinating. As Browning moves from describing nature to describing the mines and factories, her her diction becomes less typically Romantic, giving way to harder, more guttural language. It’s like transitioning from a Wes Anderson flick to Eraserhead. The repetition of words and phrases emphasizes the soul-crushing tedium of the 14+ hour workday (to say nothing of the body-crushing aspects). Reading, we can almost feel the walls closing in, as though we’re the ones digging in the dark underground or crawling into a dangerous machine to make a repair.
The rest of the poem largely deals with how the children have lost their religion, feeling abandoned by God; here I think it’s important to put aside our personal modern view of the matter and think how shocking this would be to the Victorian audience, and how much it clearly pained Browning, a devoutly spiritual woman. Despite her faith, Browning does not blame or judge the children for their lack of it. Instead, she criticizes those who preach a sort of proto-prosperity gospel — “And they tell us, of His image is the masteWho commands us to work on./Go to!" say the children,—"up in Heaven,/Dark, wheel-like, turning clouds are all we find!” — and, most pointedly, everyone who is complicit, directly or indirectly, in the children’s suffering: “Do ye hear the children weeping and disproving,/O my brothers, what ye preach?/For God's possible is taught by His world's loving —/And the children doubt of each.”