I don't post often for fear of posting in the wrong spots, and if is the wrong forum I apologize. For brevities sake, I will try to get straight to the point but this will be long. To any one that makes it to the end, thank you in advance. If you want to skip to the last five paragraphs you will get the jist of what I am trying to say. I am trying to avoid getting put on probation for disciplinary actions, but they won't be clear with what I have done wrong. I am willing to reconcile at work but I don't want to leave this job without trying to take the proper steps to make things better.
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I'm low man on the totem pole for a big company. A big one, that some might say is too big to fail. What I can say that it is in sales. My issue stems from the fact that I'm just not comfortable enough to chit chat with managers about the topics they want to talk about, which are either inappropriate, distracting me from work, or super personal. I've felt like they've wanted me gone for a minute, but I just don't fit in so I mind my business and do my job to the best of my ability.
Recently I was threatened to be put in a program to correct behaviors they don't like, but Im not officially on this probation. When I asked what the issue was they said certain team members feel I'm not approachable and or they don't like how I walk away when certain managers come over. While I believe I am operating within the rules of engagement, given that their topics make me uncomfortable and Ive chosen not to formally file any complaints, yet.
Here are a couple true examples of why I don't like to chit chat with the managers at work:
Manager 1: Likes to sneak up on you and talk about their sexual escapades they had over the weekend. I personally am not comfortable with this type of conversation at work and when they trap my in a conversation I freeze and draw blanks. I come off as cold because my appearance is intimidating, but I'm truly so uncomfortable I just freeze. When I try to probe and get to know them, the get turned off if I ask them the wrong question. I asked a manager if they watched a certain show and they got upset, said no, and ended the conversation. This same manager is high ranking, and will open a conversation talking about getting caught performing fellatio on a beach in Mexico. This was a true interaction and I wasn't interested.
Manager 2: Likes to take every opportunity to talk about themselves and their plans for vacation, but has literally cost me sales and reprimanded me for it later. This person is very touchy feely, and will subtly force you to shake their hand. I always shake for fear of retaliation but this manager will literally throw you under the bus if you treat them like they aren't a god. This manager will have me do things their way when we were trained to do it another way but the inconsistency causes friction between the rest of the team and I pay the price for that when this manager isn't around.
Manager 3: Very nice and very sweet, but they won't have my back about certain instances for fear of being on the outs with the other managers. But when we are alone, they tend agree with me. This person is new and I care for them but they allow the more tenured managers to gaslight me about any issue I bring up. I still truly care for this person, and don't want them to risk their future when I am just an associate so I just deal with it.
Manager 4: The same as manager 3, but not as nice. And we don't have the rapport for me to really go to them about my problems. They were on leave for a while and came back happy to see me, [they asked first] then gave me a hug, but before the day was over they wouldn't even look at me.
Manager 5: This manager does this weird thing where they ask you how you're doing, ask you something you're passionate about, and then they walk away... Literally just like that. I am getting reprimanded for not being open enough to conform to the culture of the company, but every time this manager asks me how my fishing is going, or if I was gaming last night, in the middle of my response they walk and it hurts every single time. They do this to everyone.
Manager 6: Replaced the manager that hired me and ultimately just won't ever let me plead my case. This manager is a nice person, but I understand this person cares more about appeasing the other managers versus actually getting to the root of the issue. Truly a nice person though, I won't take that away from them.
Manager 7: The big boss. I rarely see this person. They usually don't talk to me unless we cross paths, but for the most part they try to not even look my way. It really sucks because I feel me and this person have the most in common of all the managers. They know what's going on, but they stay out of it. I find this hard to respect none the less.
I know I'm writing a lot but I promise I am leaving a lot of relevant info out. I constantly get praise for holding myself accountable at work, the same people tell me I need to hold myself accountable when it comes to the friction between me and my coworkers. The issue is, I get along pretty well with many of them, and the others I don't chat with, we just don't chat but not for any particular reason. That's just how life works. I also took it upon myself to meet everyone, I learned about 40 names my first week out of over 100 employees and out of no where, the whole store stopped talking to me. I really don't know what I did, and it was too obvious to not feel it was orchestrated behind closed doors, but of course they will never admit to this. They try to make it seem like its the whole store, but I know the people I don't get along with; leadership just won't tell me.
In my meeting today, two managers threatened to put me on a probation of sorts and the focus would be coworker rapport. My sales metrics are trash this quarter but they told me they weren't worried about that. They told me it would last two months, and every week we would go over that week and I would be graded. They said the issues that warranted this meeting were because I walk away when I see managers coming, I have team members that aren't comfortable talking to me, and they were upset because I had an incident where a manager where I refused to shake his hand. If you read the descriptions about the managers above, I feel like most would understand.
I won't parade around like I am innocent, but I don't go out of my way to bother anyone, and I do everything they ask me to do. So I am not insubordinate. Here are the things I know I've done wrong recently, and or things I feel I could have handled better:
--I have been tardy for work maybe three times the past couple of weeks, and I've left early from feeling ill. I don't have a rep for either of these things but I've been stressed out over a recent move and am just falling into a new routine, but I am back on track.
--When I arrive, I go into the break room to clock in and I go straight to the floor. I don't mingle in the back because the managers and their buddies literally stop talking when I come around. I am so uncomfortable I just need to get out of that room. I literally have days where a person I had a good conversation with the day before won't even acknowledge me in the break room because the managers or leads are around. It kinda hurts my feelings, so to keep myself in good spirits to start my shift, I go in the back, and jump right on the sales floor. I know I could afford to play the games they play, but I'm just not built like that. I don't even feel welcomed to eat lunch in the break room. For the past 10 months I sit alone in my car on break.
--I am quiet when I am not around the coworkers I trust. Certain team members have really betrayed me, and don't know that I know that they take everything I tell them to a manager and they talk about it in the breakroom. It's so predictable that I only tell them stuff I want everyone to know. I find it serves my mental health and my ability to sell stuff better to keep conversations with these coworkers superficial and light hearted or avoid them all together but they will literally go tell on me if I don't tell them personal stuff about my life.
--I am a bit short with a particular manager, but never what I would deem disrespectful. I know I should just suck it up and play the game, but this manager makes my days hell at work, does stuff to spite me, and hurts my sales as a result of their inadequacies. They are the manager of sales, and can provide no support or advice to help me as a sales person. I honestly feel alone and lost when they are on they floor, and when I give feedback I get their response "well this is how I do it'. Manager number 2 if you didn't guess already. The other managers won't accept that I've already done everything they've asked me to do as far attempting to connect with everyone.
When I was talking to the managers today, a situation that happened a couple of days ago came up and I quickly realized the scenario was the catalyst for this awkward meeting. My boss singled me out and asked me to do something that would jeopardize my relationship with the other team members but I prepared myself to do it anyway. The following shift, I went home sick and on my way out he tried to give me a high five but I just couldn't bring myself to comply because I had had enough. I told him "no more dap, handshakes, or anything like that; especially after what you did the other night.".
I know I could have handled that differently, but that was the point they chose to take action. They brought up older scenarios that I have already mentioned but they failed to address those situations when they happened. They told me that certain people feel a way about me, but they won't say who. I am entitled to zero due process apparently. Not once did they mention my terrible sales numbers. They have plenty of ammo to use if they wanted a formal and documented meeting, but they only ever come to me when someone who I don't know has their feelings hurt.
I was writing a letter to [redacted] support because our HR isn't truly an HR and they are in the clique of spies utilized by the managers. I figured I would ask the reddit community first what they would do, because this site has really saved my life. I had two weeks of bliss at this job, then the team wouldn't even look at me. It almost brought me to tears many times, but I stuck it out and just grew closer to the people that accepted me when it wasn't cool to stand next to me. Now all of a sudden, I am at risk of being terminated because I refused to fist bump a manager, when truthfully there are other mistakes I've made that they don't even bring up. So I know they are building a case against me and it's fucked up because I gave my all to this company.
What should I do? I am definitely going to apply for new jobs, but I can't just keep running from my problems and starting over in a new place hoping for a change. I need to make a fundamental change in my behavior, or I need to swallow my pride and suck up to the bosses but they constantly move the goal post so I really can't make any progress even if I wanted to. I am fearful of retaliation if I go above the store manager because the regional manager knows what's going on. I am also afraid of retaliation if manager number 2 holds for a fist bump again and I refuse. I am not ready to leave until I hit my sales goals. I owe myself that much.
This company is slick, and if I make the wrong move they will bring up my tardies and other fireable offenses but I have really tried to be an exemplary employee thus far and my team agrees. I will be under the microscope and eventually on probation. Please help, I know quitting is the move, but I gotta change some things before that happens. I knew this was coming, because the behaviors are so predictable, but my journal has but only two entries. I am not the vengeful type, but I don't believe in bullying no matter how passive.
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Thank you,
Your neighborhood, friendly dread head.

This is gonna be a long read so bear with me.
Allow me a little bit of context here: summer of 2019, she introduces us to her boyfriend who was 19. She was 17. I knew they were dating a while back because she had a hard-core tendency of bouncing guy to guy and would go for anyone who gave her attention. We werent allowed to date until sophomore year. We had a full, unbroken home.
School starts, this is our senior year mind you. September goes fine and dandy when it comes to schooling, but at home, not so much. You see, things we're not exactly going smoothly on our end. The boyfriend was always giving the family shit, always treated my step sister like shit, and was always so full of himself. Tensions were beginning to rise.
It's about mid September, a month before her 18th, she tells me that I am the only member of the house that she loves, and that she's considering leaving. I'm BEGGING her to stay until she at least graduates before she moves to her boyfriends place (who actually lived with his mom still at the time). I told her that she wouldn't have to worry about constant fights, arguments, or threats of breaking up In the house we were at. Worst case she'd find someone new.
I did this for weeks, and she was even agreeing to it. Verbally anyway. I thought I was getting through to her. Now, I should have added this in the beginning, but she would go to her biological moms on the weekend and stay with my mom and her biological dad during the week for school. We had a better home while her bio mom was either having drug problems, legal problems, or both.
Then one day, before her 18th, she went to her mom's and said she was staying for a day.
One day.
One day led to two. Then three. Then a week. All of a sudden it's two weeks and no one knows what the fuck is going on. So, her birthday rolls around. We have to drive to her mom's so we can take my step sister to Texas roadhouse for a birthday dinner. Still doesn't come home.
This is where we take a DRASTIC nosedive in stability.
She starts to miss school. Like, A LOT of school. Quickly goes from one day a week, to multiple, to WEEKS at a time. I keep informing her bio dad to what's going on, he gets so irritated to the point that he goes up to the school to check on why his daughter wasnt showing up.
She emancipated herself from the family in the school books. Completely cut all of us out. Even went no contact with me. Step dad threatened to disown her, but didn't hold his word. I even block her at one point off all social media until my mom forces me to unblock her. She's really into the "blood is thicker than water" mentality.
So then months go by, and it becomes an on again / off again type of story with step sis and her boyfriend. She'd move back in with us, stay for like 72 hours, the go away again. This happened for months on end, even into the pandemic.
Did I also mention she announced her pregnancy in late January with all of this bullshit going on?
On again, off again, threatens of abandonment, the works. It keeps going even after the baby is born in October of 2020 (she's three now). One night she's sitting down with her bio dad because the boyfriend has abandoned her and the baby AGAIN. He sits down and has a nice long chat with her about all of it. Me and him told her pretty much the same thing:
You need to choose between your daughter and him" (granted I did it with much less guilt tripping). She's given til the morning to make a decision. Morning comes. This is where it gets to the part of me holding the grudge.
So, it's like eight in the morning (which is really early for my house's standards) and she is caught trying to pack all her stuff up. Step dads irate and then mom wakes up. So, step sister is trying to get her stuff, step dad is holding her baby, and my mom wakes up and says something that I can't recall as I was in a different room.
Tempers are flaring between the two ladies, step dad is right between them holding the baby, and then a full on fistfight occurs. Step dad gets knocked to the ground, baby in hand (she's not even 6 months). While they're fighting, step dad can't get up. I scream at him "GIVE ME THE CHILD" so loudly my throat immediately hurts. I grab her and run to my bedroom, away from the violence and tension. Thankfully the baby was completely unharmed.
As I'm trying to coddle and soothe this crying and petrified little girl, she barges in and tries to use MY PHONE without asking me to make a call to "someone". Never knew who. She packed the rest of her stuff up, took the baby, and we didn't see them again for nearly 2 months.
My qualm wasn't the fact that she left. I get why, I was a goody two shoes who followed rules and was very rarely In trouble or in hot water. She was getting in trouble and yelled at all the time because, ya know, she did the opposite.
It's HOW she left.
You're gonna tell me you loved me more than the ENTIRE FAMILY, yet keep in contact with everyone besides me? You're gonna stick with a guy who doesn't even try for you and knows he has you around his finger? Why didn't you stay until you graduated with me instead of being forced to delay it by two years? Why didn't you just take my advice and let me help you where I could?
These are questions that I have addressed, and she would brush it off or give some cheap, vague answer. This has been gnawing at me for a while, but I can't talk about it because everyone always says "it happened a while ago".
It's bullshit. It shouldn't have went like that. None of it.

I am a 28M in a relationship for the last 10 years with 27F and living together for the past 5 years. I have never cheated and have done everything for my partner. I have been a very good boyfriend. However, two months ago, I found a few texts on my partner's phone from her co-worker. He was sending flirty texts, and although my partner didn't reciprocate, she didn't stop him either. They were talking every day until 2 or 3 am. I checked her phone regularly when she was sleeping, and I even checked her Google Pay and saw a few payments between them, mostly during lunchtime. This made me sure that they were spending time together in the office too. Most of the time they talked about random things, and sometimes the guy tried to flirt with her, but she responded with disinterest. However, one text caught my attention. He asked her out to a party on the weekend, and she didn't say yes but also didn't say no. So, I decided to go out of town and see what she would do when I wasn't there. I took a random solo trip for three days on the weekend and told her it was a work trip.
After coming back, I found a few videos of them partying together in her conversation, which were sent by the guy. This made me extremely angry, and I wanted to confront her about it, but I didn't say a single word. I wasn't brave enough, and this messed up my head. I decided to put myself out there and signed up on Bumble. I got a few matches on the very first day. I ignored a few who were looking for a relationship, but then I found this average-looking 26F who was into me and didn't want a relationship either. We went out on a date, got drunk, and made out in a bar. Then she wanted to go to my place, but I told her the truth that I am in a living relationship. I explained everything about my situation, but surprisingly, she didn't have any problem with it. That day, we checked into a hotel.
After coming back at night, I checked her phone again and saw a text where the guy was expressing his excitement to see my girlfriend at the office, and she replied, "Same here." This made me extremely angry. I told the girl from Bumble about this, and she advised me to break up with my girlfriend and kick her out of the house. However, I wanted my girlfriend to feel the same pain I was feeling. So, I made a plan with the new girl to invite her to my place in the evening, hoping that my girlfriend would catch us red-handed. We acted out the plan, and my girlfriend caught us in the action, she started shouting, crying, and threw things at us. The girl from Bumble then said this is what you get when you cheat on a guy I pushed my girl out of the room and closed the door after 5 minutes when bumble girl was leaving we came out I couldn’t see my gf at my place she took off somewhere after dropping the date I called my gf to check if she okay or not & called her to home we sat down I told her I know everything about your office affairs she denied that she is having an affair told me she was just talking to her nothing happened between them & she went out partying with few other people too from the office not just him she asked me about the girl where I met her what all happened between us I told her everything.
After that day, we didn't speak with each other often, but we continued living together under one roof. Despite everything, we both can't let go of each other. However, the Bumble girl I got involved with is now causing problems. She texts and calls me every day. I was ignoring her after the incident, but last Sunday, she showed up at my door. I opened the door, and she barged in. My girlfriend was also there, and the Bumble girl started making a scene, shouting at my girlfriend, asking why she was still here and if she wanted to see more. She was telling me to kick my girlfriend out. I managed to send her back, but before leaving, she threatened that if I didn't respond to her, she would show up again with all her stuff. I think she can actually do that.
Now, people of Reddit, please suggest what I should do. How can I get rid of her?

I am a 28M in a relationship for the last 10 years with 27F and living together for the past 5 years. I have never cheated and have done everything for my partner. I have been a very good boyfriend. However, two months ago, I found a few texts on my partner's phone from her co-worker. He was sending flirty texts, and although my partner didn't reciprocate, she didn't stop him either. They were talking every day until 2 or 3 am. I checked her phone regularly when she was sleeping, and I even checked her Google Pay and saw a few payments between them, mostly during lunchtime. This made me sure that they were spending time together in the office too. Most of the time they talked about random things, and sometimes the guy tried to flirt with her, but she responded with disinterest. However, one text caught my attention. He asked her out to a party on the weekend, and she didn't say yes but also didn't say no. So, I decided to go out of town and see what she would do when I wasn't there. I took a random solo trip for three days on the weekend and told her it was a work trip.
After coming back, I found a few videos of them partying together in her conversation, which were sent by the guy. This made me extremely angry, and I wanted to confront her about it, but I didn't say a single word. I wasn't brave enough, and this messed up my head. I decided to put myself out there and signed up on Bumble. I got a few matches on the very first day. I ignored a few who were looking for a relationship, but then I found this average-looking 26F who was into me and didn't want a relationship either. We went out on a date, got drunk, and made out in a bar. Then she wanted to go to my place, but I told her the truth that I am in a living relationship. I explained everything about my situation, but surprisingly, she didn't have any problem with it. That day, we checked into a hotel.
After coming back at night, I checked her phone again and saw a text where the guy was expressing his excitement to see my girlfriend at the office, and she replied, "Same here." This made me extremely angry. I told the girl from Bumble about this, and she advised me to break up with my girlfriend and kick her out of the house. However, I wanted my girlfriend to feel the same pain I was feeling. So, I made a plan with the new girl to invite her to my place in the evening, hoping that my girlfriend would catch us red-handed. We acted out the plan, and my girlfriend caught us in the action, she started shouting, crying, and threw things at us. The girl from Bumble then said this is what you get when you cheat on a guy I pushed my girl out of the room and closed the door after 5 minutes when bumble girl was leaving we came out I couldn’t see my gf at my place she took off somewhere after dropping the date I called my gf to check if she okay or not & called her to home we sat down I told her I know everything about your office affairs she denied that she is having an affair told me she was just talking to her nothing happened between them & she went out partying with few other people too from the office not just him she asked me about the girl where I met her what all happened between us I told her everything.
After that day, we didn't speak with each other often, but we continued living together under one roof. Despite everything, we both can't let go of each other. However, the Bumble girl I got involved with is now causing problems. She texts and calls me every day. I was ignoring her after the incident, but last Sunday, she showed up at my door. I opened the door, and she barged in. My girlfriend was also there, and the Bumble girl started making a scene, shouting at my girlfriend, asking why she was still here and if she wanted to see more. She was telling me to kick my girlfriend out. I managed to send her back, but before leaving, she threatened that if I didn't respond to her, she would show up again with all her stuff. I think she can actually do that.
Now, people of Reddit, please suggest what I should do. How can I get rid of her?

I’m a 65 yr old Bi male. I first had sex with a guy when I was 17. It was quick and dirty in an adult cinema. I continued having this type of sex with guys and never had any urge to have an emotional relationship or even had a crush on a guy. I have attractive male friends gay and straight but once someone is a friend I don’t consider them for sex. Most of the women I know are married and usually it’s to a friend so that takes them out of consideration. But I still am attracted, I just don’t do anything about it. In 1979 in my senior year of college I met my wife, fell in love and we had a great sex life. She knew I was bi going into the relationship and thought it was cool. But what was cool in 1979 got scary by about 1982 when everybody was just learning about AIDS. I tried to be totally monogamous but I never was. The longest I went without playing with a guy was about a year during her pregnancies. I suffered incredible guilt about this which led to periods of severe depression when I was hospitalized 3 times.
My wife passed away 8 years ago and I thought I’ll finally be able to have sex with guys guilt free and maybe I’ll be able to feel something emotional that I’ve never felt before but if anything I dislike guys more now more than ever. I meet guys mostly through hook up apps like Manhunt and I think I’ve only had sex with the same guy maybe 3 times. I went to a gay bar and I didn’t feel uncomfortable but I didn’t feel like I fit in either. I went to a gay shrink who said that some guys fall in love with guys and some just want to have sex with guys and I guess that’s me. I meet women and get crushes all the time and I think if I was going to get a crush on a guy it would have happened by now.
What reinforces this for me is a guy I've played with got thrown in jail over the weekend for a DUI. He gave his phone to his gf and she looked at his browser history and found all the gay sites he's been looking at and feels betrayed and doesn't want anything to do with him now.
So I’m starting to date women and not much has happened but I’m determined to be honest about my sexuality. I’m wondering when people think is the right time to bring this up?

TLDR; (25M) My GF (24F) has been sleeping with her neighbor (36M) and I am spiraling out of control due to my reality instantly morphing into a nightmare.
After months of being called psycho, crazy, controlling, paranoid, etc I finally caught my girlfriend cheating on me 2 night ago.
I drove over to her house and as I was pulling up she was stepping out of the neighbors house. The neighbor (Luigi, 36M) comes outside and explains to me that he was told by my GF (Elizabeth, 24F) that we were broken up and had been for a long time. My now ex girlfriend then comes outside and starts telling me its not cheating because we have been over for a while and yada yada. I guess she forgot to tell me…..
I am thoroughly disgusted for a few reasons:

1. It’s now evident that she had sex with him and me on the same night, several nights a week, for over a year straight. She would fuck him and then come over and kiss me on the mouth and cuddle in my bed. FOR. OVER. A. YEAR. STRAIGHT The age difference is also extremely disgusting to me. 2. This woman truly was the love of my life. I lived and breathed the sustenance from this woman. If she was here I was warm. If she was gone I was cold. I viewed her as THE most decedent Goddess ever to grace the earth. And I made sure to treat her like it every single day. She would constantly thank me for treating her so well. I can’t wrap my mind around how she could knowingly hurt me so deeply. I can’t wrap my mind around the fact that another man was defiling my Goddess each and every night, while I was being made a fool. 3. I’m just plain embarrassed. Whenever I would hear stories of people cheating, I would shudder. I had always viewed getting cheated on as a terminal disease, impossible to ever rid yourself from. I know understand that I was right. Everybody looks at you like all you are is the guy who’s bitch got fucked. 4. She could not have possibly loved me. She KNEW what kind of irreversible damage this would have on my psyche. She is an incredibly smart person. She weighed the pros and the cons and came to the conclusion that enjoying another man’s penis was worth the damage it would cause me for the rest of my life. She could not have possibly loved me. 5. She was the only person I had in my life. I have no deep connections with my family, I have no close friendships. I have no social clubs or internet groups. I do not even feel legitimate love for any other single person on the planet except for her. All I want to do is run to her and feel her warmth and tell her how badly I’ve been mangled! But she is the one who caused it….. The loneliness I am experiencing literally has manifested itself as a permanent weight on my chest. I am actually going insane. 6. I haven’t heard from her since I busted them. She hasn’t reached out even once to explain herself or offer any clarity, or to say sorry, or even to say goodbye. One day I was head over heals in love, and the next day I am in the pits of hell. The whiplash is insane. I just want her to talk to me… 

When I walk past the mirror, or catch a reflection of myself on my phone screen, I absolutely fall apart. When I scroll thru my camera roll and see my girlfriend I begin to sob like a baby. How could that perfect face be so cruel? I can’t bring myself to delete any of her pictures because it feels like I’m killing her. It’s like I’m killing that moment that was preserved on camera and ill never get it back. This is made even more significant by the fact that I don’t think she will ever reach out to me again. I will never see her again. The final time I ever got to see the love of my life, she was in another mans oversized sweater, running into his house. The image is forever seared into my brain. The day prior to this we were laughing and cuddling and having sex like everything was fine. THE WHIPLASH IS INSANE.
I do not know where to go from here. I can accept that she’s gone but It’s so hard because I don’t have a shoulder to cry on. All I want to do is fall into a woman’s warm chest and cry my heart out. My pillow will have to suffice.
This post only begins to scratch the surface of all the different dimensions of pain I am feeling. I have no clue what my next steps will be because I truly feel dead inside. I truly wish I could go to sleep tonight and not wake up.
Thank you for reading, it makes me feel better that someone knows how deeply I’m suffering. Please guys, show me some love or recommend me a group I can talk to about this or something.

(Sorry for formatting in advance)
All my life I feel like my mom always compares to other people. I don’t know whether it’s intentional or not. Maybe I’m just being over sensitive… An example of one of the things she has said is that one of my cousins could be a super model because of her looks, but I would only excel when it comes to academics since that was my strongest area. Again, I could be looking into it too hard, but it just rubbed me the wrong way. Something more recent that happened was at a family gathering and I wasn’t talking very much. Some of my relatives asked why I was so quiet and before I could answer my mom chimes in and says, “Oh, she’s usually quiet! You know how tech people are (I work in IT) they’re just nerdy and keep to themselves.” Again, this rubbed me the wrong way. I am usually talkative but I was very tired that day. The next day I confronted her about and all I got in response was, “Oh, I knew this would come up the moment after I said it. Sorry. It’s noted that I’ll just let you answer for yourself.” (I am an adult) Which leads me to a few days ago she’s bragging on the phone about another friend’s kids about how he’s doing so well, he proposed to his long time sweetheart, he’s in a high position at his job, etc. How he struggled without a father figure but turned out fantastic. Yet I’ve graduated with my Bachelor (her and my dad didn’t go to college), seeking my Master next year, and already planning for my doctorate, and all I get is a nerdy person in tech with zero social skills… I’m tired of it.

So yeah. Title sums it up. My mother and father divorced when I was rather young. Once he married my stepmother they slowly became JWs and eventually brought my sister into the fold.
Now, granted, dad tried once to convert me once I was 18. I was in my teenage edgelord athiest phase then, so it didn't go so well. Other than a comment here or there, it's not been much of a problem. I get along fine with my JW fam for the most part.
I was at my sister's house, and he was in town for the weekend. It was just a regular family gathering, until my bro-in-law and father started edging towards the conversion talk.
This time it was my BIL doing most of the talking mainly because my father tends to get a little temperamental and, rightly so, that ain't gonna do any favors. My sis chimed in once or twice, but she's much like my father so she was basically shushed. My BIL is a lot more civil and is trying to come from a ground of understanding, which I do appreciate. Basically some things we touched on were:
-Prophecy. Basically he's all about the Book of Daniel and the 1914 stuff. I've not looked too much into it, but I do know it's pretty damn easy to fudge numbers so wouldn't be surprised that's going on there. Basically "world is getting worse by the day, etc etc, so much killing, people can't even leave their doors unlocked anymore". My main rebuttal to this, having not been familiar with all the particular maths was that the world has always been a rather rough place. The only difference is now with 24 hour news cycles and the internet, we can hear just how bad shit really is everywhere rather than most of the news never making it beyond the community it actually affected.
-Death and Afterlife. The one that really shocked my father in particular is that I'm not quite afraid of death. Do I want to die? No, but I know it's gonna happen at some point so I'm not going to fear it. I think he took it as a personal insult, like I didn't want to live forever with him, but... yeah living forever kind of sounds dull tbh. I feel it cheapens the life we have, and what will you even do for eternity?! It'll get boring at some point. I straight up told him sleeping forever sounds cool enough to me. BIL started making some points about how death "feels" unnatural, which I just simply said "I don't agree with that view". I'm guessing this line of discussion is meant to play upon fears of death/attachment to loved ones. I brought up that, while I'm not as strongly of an atheist as I was in my teenage years, I have mostly found solace in Buddhist lines of philosophy (I wouldn't say I'm a practicing Buddhist, but as far as a moral/philosophical framework it's the thing that has clicked the most with me). Particularly philosophies on attachment, so this line of discussion kind of fell flat for them.
A couple other things I touched on were Biblical history (BIL legit didn't know the OT is from the Torah), translation errors, and so on. Either way, it seems like there's being a push to convert me again. I was taken a bit more off guard so I don't think I was able to make a lot of the stronger explanations/points that I would have liked, but I suppose reading more and more on this sub will give me a better understanding of things to look out for.
Anyways, that's enough rambling. It's just something I had to type out and share somewhere, this seems the place to do it!

This man started talking to my grandmother on Facebook. They have been friends for 2 years, yet only talking since this winter.
He says he lives in Canada. Has a Canadian phone number and address. We are in the states so no way to verify he is actually there.
He has very detailed information about our religion/community , so I am inclined to believe he is not lying about that aspect of himself. I can’t tell if he is who he says he is like “on paper”. There’s no way to tell from his Facebook or a google search if the pictures & name match the person she is talking to.
Alsooo, my grandmother is 89 and has an extremely air brushed Facebook profile pic. She looks a lot younger than she is. She’s never told him how old she is, just that she is “older”. He is 47.
I feel like he is catfishing in some capacity. Here are my red flags:
-She can only call him at certain times…large chunks of the day he is unavail
-He says he doesn’t have a cell phone, which in the community isn’t the craziest thing, but also incredibly convenient for him
-He refuses to download Skype and video chat
-He has an “incurable fatal disease”
-He made a point to tell her that he was passing along her phone number to his mother and sister in case something grave should happen to him. (Which I feel like is setting up to hit her up for money later on).
-He has never met her in person. They only spoke on the phone for the first time, 3 weeks ago and he has professed his undying love for her and asked her to marry him.
-He claims he doesn’t care how old she is, just wants to be with her.
-Talks to her often about her moving to Canada
I don’t know if he’s actually catfishing her. But I feel like he is trying to get something from her. Maybe just a more comfortable life on her dime?
I’m looking for any help that can be offered. Does anyone have any suggestions on what I can do about this situation? Maybe a way to research him? Non-personal background checks in Canada?
Thank you in advance!!

To all current pilots in this reddit platform , please consider replying not just for me but for all other aspiring pilots out there. These concern I believe is extremely important other than passion.
I'm 23 right now and I had a long sit down with my dad yesterday talking about my passion which was to be a pilot .
I want to be a pilot I do, but via the advice of my father it's best to ask the hard questions first.
I'm based in Malaysia , and the flying schools here are governed by an aviation body known as CAAM , which follows the standards of EASA not FAA
I plan to finance my flight school via the help of my father by securing an education loan from a Malaysian Bank , the cost of my flight school i researched so far costs approximately RM439,000 (95,351USD + -) .
Passion isnt an issue , i want this and i'm willing to go great lengths to achieve this but my future is a concern
This concern about my future as a pilot is specifically regarding several topics:

1. Paying off loans and ability to buy a house and a car in the future and being able to provide.

To senior pilots or captains out there, Assuming all goes to plan , I graduate at age 25 , I start getting a job in the airline industry as a second officer type rated on an a320 being on the observer's seat (example only , realistically I will take any aircraft type rating the airline offers me but I have a goal of getting type rated on multiple aircrafts throughout my life to increase my career security) . From this age and this position , how long would it realistically take (based on your average salary that you have earned incrementally from the lowest position up to captain) to be financially secure enough to :
A. Pay off my loans completely
B. Buy a house and being able to pay it off
C. Buy a decent car and being able to pay it off
D. Start a family and provide Extremely well
How long did it took you guys to achive A,B,C and D ? Would I be able to do this by age 30? 35? 40 ? 50 ?
Please be as honest as possible and do not sugar coat, screw all the marketing bs that being a pilot is a good life etc, I need to know the challenges I will be facing and advice on how to be prepared to face them.

1. Airlines work politics .

Assuming all goes well, I pass flying school , I gain the hours I start as a second officer and I start building my career.. I do everything right I follow every single rule of the book.
But there has to be a corporate catch somewhere ... some kind of grey area where as much as I follow the rules , there could be management grey areas or unspoken rules about the airline industry that I must abide by . If there is , what are they and how would I go about that .
Is there any favouritism in the industry, has anyone ever been fired by the airlines before for apparently no good reason other than 'you follow the rules but we just dont like you / we want to hire another pilot because he has ties to a fellow colleague / gov body /family ,'? Has any of you ever experienced a delay in your promotion to captain because other pilots got the queue cut due to connections ?
these are highly unspoken about items and they dont pop up on google but I need to know this before I invest and risk my life in service to the industry and know whether or not there is going to be some corporate BS that I need to prep in order to safeguard my career security.

1. Working for Airlines in another country ( how difficult is the process of license conversion / visa or any related documents that I must know about in order to make this a potential reality in pursuit of a higher paying salary )
   
2. What are the typical benefits and perks of being a pilot ?
   

- flight discounts ?
-complimentary stays in hotels ?
-family packages ?
-memberships ?
-free healthcare ?
- taxes ?
(Details on cost)
Payment Scheme : Bank Loan covers 90% of the school's fees for a max of RM400,000 (86,881 USD)
with 7.75 % interest rate pa with a max tenure of 20 years .
Bank says during my flight school course I only pay installments based on the interest first excluding principal .(20 months duration for CPL/IR + Frozen ATPL course ).
after graduating , I get a 6 months grace period where i dont have to start paying the bank immediately . After that however I start paying Principal + Interest and from my understanding this a 'Reducing Balance' type payment .
I plan to take the loan and choose the 20 year tenure period, to give me more breathing space to pay off the loans, however once I get a really good paying salary , I will attempt to pay off the loans in lump sum to avoid paying such a ridiculous interest amount . Ideally down to 10 years or less
I do understand as well that some of this is PnC and maybe u dont feel comfortable posting it publicly, you may also direct message me or whatsapp my number +60108838549 (Chris) from Malaysia .
(Phone number Privacy is the least of my concern and is a risk im willing to take in search of valuable information )

Im female, 16, and I honestly get along with people in their twenties way better than other teenagers. Im just curious: why?
I'll admit I also don't really have any freinds. But I have a partner (1 and 1/3 year long, met up 3 times) my age who I get along with the most in my life, and another good freind a bit younger than me who I have known for about 8 years. I also have a couple other smaller online friends. So don't worry, I feel far from lonely.
A lot of people I meet my age I feel have intrests that I don't care about, unless they are guys. But if they are guys they usually have no intrest in talking to me and are to inmature for me. At least the ones who stand out.
Now that I think about it, I get along with guys better at any age lol.
Most teenage females don't play games which is most of what I do by this point. Usually its anime, something on the phone, drawing, idk. None of that is interesting.

When I was getting started, an actor I knew gave me some really good advice. While deciding whether or not to take a certain role, consider three factors: the money, the show, and the people. If at least two of those things are good, accept the job. If they’re paying you well and you love the play, you won’t mind putting up with shitty people. If it’s a great show with a cast full of friends, but you’re not getting paid so well, that’s still alright, it’ll be artistically fulfilling. If it’s a bad show but you love the cast and you’re making money, you’ll probably have the time of your life making fun of the playwright backstage and laughing all the way to the bank.
What my friend failed to mention is that as an aspiring actor, you don’t usually get to be that picky. When I got the call from my agent that a production of The Bacchae was urgently seeking a new chorus member, all I could see were dollar signs. My survival job had just fallen through (the family I nannied for was moving upstate, insisting that Manhattan had just gotten “too dangerous” for their toddler), and my savings were only going to cover my rent for another month.
It was raining the day of my audition, and my train got delayed. I showed up panting (I had to run from the subway station) and my hair a disaster. Luckily, in The Bacchae, the chorus is full of… well… Bacchae. Fervent followers of Dionysus, wild women, drunk and running through the countryside. In the climax of the play, they crowd the protagonist in a frenzy, literally ripping him limb from limb.
I’ll never know if it was my frenetic energy from barely making it to the theater on time, or my actual acting, but I got the part. My costume fitting was the next day– they weren’t kidding about urgently needing a replacement. Which thrilled me, because I wasn’t kidding about urgently needing the money. At the fitting, I discovered something my agent failed to mention about the production: this wasn’t just any version of The Bacchae, it was a recreation– an attempt to perform the play in the traditional Greek style. In other words, everyone was wearing masks.
I’ve never been fond of masks. We had to do a few assignments with them in my college acting courses; covering your face can enhance the physicality of your body, something like that. But I never liked wearing them, or seeing other people wearing them. It wouldn’t be fair to call it a full-on fear, but the stiffness, the lack of expression, gives me a weird feeling in my stomach. And wearing one, your field of vision limited, your mouth covered, making it harder to breathe, harder to project your voice– I don’t like it. It’s as simple as that.
But I needed the money. My costume wasn’t ugly, per se, just strange: a long white dress, or maybe toga is a better word, the fabric about the thickness of a burlap sack. My mask, stark white, paper mache, covering my entire face except my eyes, the mouth carved to imitate a grin. No shoes. My hair tucked into a wild black wig– we wore wigs, they explained to me, so the chorus could be identical, indistinguishable. We moved as one, spoke as one, and were meant to look like one. They even made sure to cast women of the same height. In our costumes, it was impossible to tell which of us was which.
It didn’t help that I was an outsider to the rest of the cast, joining the show weeks into rehearsals. Everyone seemed annoyed that they had to teach me the blocking, the inflection of the lines (so my voice didn’t stick out from the other chorus girls), and where to go backstage during scenes with no chorus. A few people tried to be nice to me, but quickly gave up when they realized I knew nothing about Greek theater, or masked theater, or the avant garde. My last show had been a regional production of Cats, for God’s sake. I was totally out of my element.
Things got especially sour when I tried to ask what had happened to the girl I was replacing. Nobody wanted to talk about it. People gasped when I brought it up. The clearest answer I got was a whispered, hesitant, “she fell,” but the person wouldn’t elaborate any further. The cast seemed superstitious, uncomfortable, like talking about her would cause them to suffer her fate: removal from the show. And it was clear that, aside from me, everyone else loved this show. The actor playing Dionysus, the couple of times he deigned to talk to me, just kept gushing about how honored he was to play this role, how electrifying it felt to put his history minor to use, to show people a piece of the world’s theatrical beginnings.
I thought the show was fine. Kinda boring, kinda scary. I don’t think I “get” The Bacchae. In brief, the story is about Dionysus, son of Zeus, disguised as a human. He and his followers (the chorus) show up in a town, but the leader of the town, Pentheus, is upset about it. He doesn’t understand why all these women are acting crazy, and he arrests Dionysus, not believing him to be an actual God. As punishment, Dionysus possesses Pentheus’s own mother with the same madness as his followers, and together, with their bare hands, they rip Pentheus apart. His mom walks back into town holding her son’s head, thinking it to be, in her madness, the head of a lion. When she realizes what she’s done, she is overwhelmed by grief, and futilely attempts to put Pentheus’s mutilated corpse back together. Dionysus returns, basically saying, “well, he said I wasn’t a God, and that’s blasphemous, so he got what was coming to him.” Pentheus’s mother is exiled.
It’s incredibly dark. In the reviews, critics called it daring, challenging, a bloody spectacle, a feminist masterpiece. I don’t really get what part of “a man who’s a God possesses women’s minds, driving them to murder” screams “feminism,” but hey, I’m the girl who commuted to New Jersey every day for four months to do Cats, what do I know?
Here’s something I do know: the other chorus girls did not like me. And they took their jobs seriously. As we waited to enter for each scene, there was dead quiet in the wings. Usually, there’s some light joking, maybe quickly running lines, maybe physical warmups, shaking out your nerves– I tried to do this once. Before our entrance at the top of the show, we all gathered in the stage right wing, all twelve of us, a perfect and identical dozen. It was a dress rehearsal. No audience. I did a few jumping jacks, trying to hype myself up. Another masked girl grabbed my bicep, hard. When I turned, she just shook her head “no.” Just a simple, silent, “no.” We don’t do that here. We stand silently in the wings, focusing on our craft, breathing, waiting for our entrance. I never tried it again.
When you can’t talk to your coworkers, acting becomes a lot less fun. The collaboration element is totally gone. And honestly, the “acting” element was gone for me, too. How am I supposed to find my character or sense of identity in a role when my role is “don’t let your voice stick out, don’t take a wrong step, blend in perfectly with eleven women who dislike you?”
So before the shows, instead of chatting, or doing jumping jacks, I wandered the theater. I’ve always loved theaters; the dramatic architecture, the ornate prosceniums, the stark contrast of backstage, so dark, so dusty. The theater was no Broadway house, but it had a fly system (which we didn’t use, because the Greeks wouldn’t have been able to fly anything in), just over three hundred seats (including a mezzanine– fancy!), and lots of backstage space. I could say more about it, because I spent hours during the run of the show wandering, but it wouldn’t be terribly interesting to anyone who’s not me. Just know, it was a beautiful old theater– and I mean OLD. Built in the 1910s, just before the Great Depression. I used to love imagining how many generations of people had performed on that stage, imagining what they’d think of this show, or what they’d think of me.
About a week into my wandering, on some fifteen-minute break, I was looking at the ladder that led up to the catwalk– a long, thin metal walkway stretching across the stage from above, usually used for hanging lights. I wondered how long it had been since it was used during a show. I wondered if it was even safe. What would the view be like from up there, seeing the entire stage from thirty feet in the air?
I slowly looked up the ladder. I wouldn’t actually climb it. That would be crazy, right? I’m not particularly good with heights. As my eyes lifted, I made eye contact– or rather, mask contact– with someone. A fellow chorus girl, up on the catwalk.
I stopped breathing for a second. What was she doing up there? I started to say something stupid, like, “Why are you up there?” when just as quickly as the face appeared, it vanished. I saw her white robed form retreat down the catwalk, heading for a different ladder, probably. It was weird. Why did she run? Embarrassed to be caught somewhere she shouldn’t be?
I allowed myself to entertain a little fantasy: maybe she was just like me. Maybe she also hated the other chorus girls, and didn’t “get” The Bacchae. Maybe she was exploring the theater for fun on our break, enjoying the old architecture, like I did. I had no idea who she was under the mask, and she had no idea who I was. She probably thought I was one of the normal judgemental girls, and ran off before I could tell on her to the stage manager.
I was filled with unfounded hope. Could I make a friend here? Was it possible? After two and a half weeks of silence from the other girls, it was hard to imagine. How would I find her? How would I let her know it was me– that I had seen her on the catwalk, and we were the same?
After that day, I got much more observant. When the director called for a break, instead of immediately retreating into the depths of backstage, I watched my eleven doppelgangers carefully, tracking who went for water, who went back to the dressing rooms, who ran off towards the vending machines. It was hard to tell everyone apart, but people had to take their masks off to drink water eventually. I memorized faces and tried to keep track of them. I started to get a handle on everyone’s patterns, narrowing down potential adventurers.
It was impossible. Eleven people is too many to observe. But I’m an actor. Memorizing shit is literally my job. By week four, just days from opening, I had three potential girls. I tried to stick close to them during rehearsals, picking one to follow each day, but nobody ever wandered towards the catwalk. Maybe the girl, whoever she was, had been scared away from adventuring when I caught her. I started to lose hope. We were opening soon– I should focus on making my entrances, not making friends.
But then I saw her again.
This time, it was half an hour before the curtain went up for our invited dress rehearsal. The press was there. I was nervous. I knew I had my part down, but when you’re doing a show, no matter how prepared you are, there’s always the lingering fear that you’ll freeze up, forget everything, and ruin everyone’s hard work. It just means that you care. I was surprised that I cared so much. I still didn’t even get the play. I couldn’t let the other girls see me weak. I barely show my real feelings to people I care about, much less mean actresses who look down on me. To get away from it all, I wandered down to another unused part of the stage: the orchestra pit. We did have music in the show, but the Greeks didn’t have orchestra pits. So it was closed off, being used as storage.
I loved it down there. I loved looking through the storage bins, finding props from long-forgotten productions– sometimes I would find something incredible, something I swore was from the day the theater opened, something old and valuable– and usually, I could never find it again. Those bins were a treasure trove. Of all the weird little spaces I found backstage, the pit was my favorite. I felt like a real explorer down there, illuminating my path with my phone flashlight, getting spooked when a mouse ran over my foot (of course the theater had mice, it was more than a hundred years old! And besides, every building has mice in New York City).
That day, I wasn’t there to look around. Just to sit. Just to catch my breath. I tiptoed down the creaky steps, and plopped myself on the ground, surrounded by bins. I inhaled and exhaled, smelling the mildew-y scent of old props on every side of me. And that’s when I heard a noise. Not a mouse noise– I was used to those. Something bigger. I turned my phone flashlight on immediately, calling, “hello?”
And the light landed on a mask, just like mine. Mine which was currently off, because I was doing my breathing exercises. I felt exposed– she could see my face, but I couldn’t see hers. I stood up. “You scared me!”
She didn’t respond. She looked at me for a second, and started to retreat the other way, towards the stairs at the other side of the pit.
“Wait!” I called. “I won’t tell anyone I saw you!”
She stopped for a second. But then she kept walking. I stood and followed. “Please stop. Can I at least know who you are? I don’t fit in with most of the chorus girls–”
I reached for her long white toga. I swear, I had it in my hand, but somehow, she slipped away. I staggered a bit, almost tripped, confused that I hadn’t made contact with her costume. And when I looked back up, I only saw a glimpse of her disappearing up the stairs. I tried to follow, again, but I found that side of the pit’s stairs reached a dead end. I didn’t understand how she’d gotten out. And when I looked back down at my phone, it was time for places. Disappointed and defeated, I rushed away to the other stairs, making my way to the stage right wing to wait for my entrance.
I counted heads immediately when I arrived. Maybe she hadn’t made it back yet. But, alas: twelve. All accounted for. I nudged a girl next to me, subtly. “Who was the last one here besides me?”
She just stared at me for a moment, which came off as very creepy through the blank dead stare of her mask. “How the fuck am I supposed to know? We all look exactly the same.”
I sighed. “Okay. Thanks.” For nothing, I thought bitterly.
The invited dress went well. The press liked it, as I’ve already said. I was distracted the entire time. After that day, I made it a habit to count all the girls when the stage manager called for “places.” If I was right about this girl, she, like me, would be one of the last, if not the last one there. She would be wandering, exploring, getting away from the bullies.
I wish I hadn’t done this. I wish I’d given up when she disappeared on a dead-end staircase. I wish I’d never seen her on the catwalk. Because when I started counting heads, I noticed something impossible. Sometimes, before we went on, I counted thirteen identical masked faces.
It was a chorus of twelve. It was supposed to be twelve. I’d recount. Recount again. Thirteen. A chill went down my spine. We all looked the same. Same masks, same togas, same wigs. Who was the imposter? How could anyone be an imposter? It didn’t make sense. How would they get into the theater? How would they get a costume?
I started counting more often. Between scenes, in the dressing rooms, even on stage during dull moments. It fluctuated. Sometimes I’d count twelve for a whole day, an entire show, and sigh in relief, feeling like some curse was broken. But the next day, at least once, I’d count thirteen.
And it seemed as if one masked pair of eyes was always trained on me. I don’t know how she knew it was me. We looked the same. But she’d stare. It felt scary, but also ridiculous– I couldn’t be sure it was the same person looking every time. I couldn’t be sure it was unlucky number thirteen. But I felt like it was.
I felt a lot of things. I felt like I couldn’t tell anyone. The other girls already didn’t like me– I couldn’t have them thinking I was crazy. And admitting the presence of the thirteenth would mean admitting to my adventures into forbidden backstage areas. I couldn’t lose this job. I was living paycheck to paycheck. I wasn’t eating well, or sleeping well– maybe this was all a hallucination. And somehow, my biggest feeling was that if I told someone about the thirteenth, I’d never see her again.
And I needed to see her again. The obsession had only gotten stronger. I knew, somehow, deep inside, that she was the one I had seen on the catwalk and in the orchestra pit. I no longer wanted to be her friend– I wanted to corner her. To ask who she was, and why she was sneaking in as if she was one of us. I wanted to ask what she wanted from me.
Because she must want something from me, right? Why else would she stare? Why would she appear only to me?
The timing never lined up. The show had opened at this point, and I had a job to do: delighting the audience. I couldn’t skip my entrance to catch number thirteen. The chorus formations would look ridiculous with a missing person. And as much as the other girls hated me, I owed it to them as my costars to make them look good.
Logically, I knew there was only one person the thirteenth could be: Catalina, the actress I’d replaced. She must be jealous of me. Bitter. Maybe she wanted to take my role, like I’d taken hers. It would be insane, but it was all that made sense. She was the only other person who had the costume, who knew the keypad code to get into the theater. She must have recovered from her fall and come to find me.
It was almost like a game. It definitely made the show more interesting for me. Before I realized what was happening, I dreaded performances. I felt stupid, taking on this role in a show I didn’t even understand. But now I had so much to do. I had to plan.
I started showing up early, an hour before my call time. I walked my old spots, thinking I may see her. The other chorus girls were impressed that I was showing up early, thinking it showed some sort of dedication to the show. I think they even started to hate me less. They still detested any attempts at conversation in the wings, but in the dressing room, I started to have a few breakthroughs. In particular, I started a semi-friendship with Erin. Ironically, she had been one of the three women I thought may be the thirteenth, until I realized the thirteenth wasn’t really one of us at all.
She was the only person who I could actually ask about Catalina. “Did she ever say anything about the theater? The building, I mean? Did she have a favorite part of it?”
Erin would laugh at my seemingly random specificity. “We weren’t close, Michelle. I have no idea what she thought about the theater.”
“What did she do on her breaks?”
Erin thought for a second. “I don’t know. I never saw her at the vending machines, or the dressing room. I guess she found some quiet place to run lines.”
That confirmed it, for me. A quiet place like the catwalk. Or the orchestra pit. We were three weeks into our five week run when I came up with a plan to catch Catalina. It wasn’t a great plan, and I had no idea if it would work, but showing up an hour early every day was making me tired and producing zero results. I needed a new strategy. I realized that after seeing her in the pit, I only ever saw the thirteenth when all twelve of us were together.
So I told a white lie. One night after the show, when everyone was changing in the dressing room, I appealed to my fellow chorus girls. “Are you guys busy before the show tomorrow?” I innocently asked. “I’m feeling a little shaky on some of the entrances. If we could all get here just twenty minutes before our call time tomorrow, I’d love to run some stuff with you guys. I’ve been running it on my own, but without the entire team, I don’t always remember where I fit.”
To my surprise and intense joy, everyone agreed. They really did seem to respect me more when I looked like I was taking my role seriously. I could barely sleep that night, I was so excited to see if my plan worked. And hey, if it didn’t, I had two more weeks of shows to think up something else.
It was a Sunday night, our last show of the week. Mondays are often “dark days” in professional theater, meaning there are no shows that day to give the team a rest. I had planned this on purpose– if I failed, I had a dark day to reflect on that failure and try again.
At 5:40, twenty minutes before our call time, all the girls were assembled and in costume. We started running entrances. After ten minutes, I thought my plan had failed. We had run our first three entrances, and I never counted more than twelve heads in the wings. But around 5:55, as we got to our entrances in act two, offstage, I locked eyes with a mask. A thirteenth mask.
I quickly told everyone “I think I got it, you guys, thank you so much for coming early!” Everyone mumbled that it was no problem, that they were happy to help.
The thirteenth mask broke eye contact with me, looking around in confusion– perhaps distress. The girls started to trickle back towards the dressing room. The thirteenth turned and power-walked away. I shoved through the crowd to catch her, not calling out like I had in the past. I knew she didn’t respond to that. I knew I had to catch her now or never. Once we were out of the crowd’s eyeline, I began to run. She ran, too. “You’re not getting away this time!” I yelled, like some kind of cartoon superhero. My adrenaline was pumping, and blood rushed to my ears.
After I yelled, I suddenly became aware of another set of running feet behind me. “Michelle? Where are you going?” It was Erin’s voice.
“Don’t follow me!” I hastily called back, picking up speed. The thirteenth also picked up speed. Though she was running just as fast as I was, she showed no signs of exertion. I couldn’t hear heavy breathing, or heavy feet on the floor. It was like she was gliding. It infuriated me.
Erin didn’t let up. “Michelle, the stage manager is gonna wonder where we are!”
I ignored her. The thirteenth rounded a corner, and I realized where she was going: the catwalk. The ladder.
She ascended the rungs rapidly, like a spider. I clamored up much less gracefully. Erin’s voice had a heavy tinge of concern. “Michelle, what are you doing?! It’s not safe up there!”
“Then don’t follow me!” I yelled back, exasperated. “This is between me and her!” Despite my vocal warning, I heard Erin climbing behind me.
Once on the metal rail, I looked both ways, terrified she’d escaped me again. But her white toga was just a few feet away, retreating into darkness. I lunged at her. The entire catwalk shook. The thirteenth and I both grabbed the railing to steady ourselves. We met eyes. Or rather, we met masks.
“You have nowhere to go.” I stated.
I heard Erin reaching the top of the ladder behind me. “Michelle, come down, please. You’re scaring me.”
“I can’t. I finally have her.” I took a step towards the thirteenth. She took an equal and opposite step back. “Take the mask off.” I beckoned her. “I know it’s you, Catalina.”
I felt the rail shake slightly as Erin got on it. “What are you talking about, Michelle?!”
“She’s been sneaking in, Erin! She’s been standing in the wings with us before we enter! For weeks!” I took another step towards the thirteenth. In my peripheral vision, I could see how high we were above the stage. Thirty feet. You could die, falling from that height.
“It’s not Catalina. It can’t be. Stop this.” Erin called. Finally, frustrated, I turned towards her.
“Who else could it be?!”
Erin had taken her mask off. Her face was streaked with terror. “Catalina died, Michelle. She fell off this catwalk, directly onto her face, and she died. Please come down with me. I don’t know who you’re talking to, and I don’t know what you’re trying to do, but it isn’t worth it.”
“What are you talking about? I’m talking to–”
I turned back, and she was gone. Vanished like a bad dream. “I swear to God, Erin.” I started to say. “She was right in front of me. I chased her here–”
I turned back to Erin. The thirteenth was behind her.
It made no sense. Nobody can move that fast. Nobody can be in front of me one second and behind me the next. It was inhuman. I stopped speaking. I stopped breathing. It sucks to learn that in a fight-or-flight situation, my answer is to freeze.
Erin must’ve seen how my face changed. “Michelle?” She asked quietly. “What’s wrong?”
Behind her, the thirteenth raised a hand to her mask. Her hands were impossibly pale. How had I never noticed that before? She gripped the mask in her hand. Time stretched. It must’ve only been a second, because Erin didn’t move. But it felt like years of my life passed me by as the thirteenth, inch by inch, raised her mask from her face. Or– raised her mask.
Because there was no face.
Under the mask, pale and gruesome, was a bloody flat edge. Broken, disgusting, it was impossible to make out eyes, or a nose, or a mouth. Inside a somewhat face-shaped frame of stark-white skin, all I could see was flesh, red and raw, squished in on itself. Like someone had fallen from a very high height. And landed on their face.
By the time I finally began to react, it was too late. The thirteenth– or, Catalina– or, the ghost, or– whatever the fuck that thing was. It moved its hands from the mask to Erin’s shoulders. And it pushed. And she screamed, agonizingly loud, as she flew over the side of the railing. And she screamed for the second or so she was in the air. I was screaming, too. And after the crunch of her body hitting the wooden floor of the stage, everyone else screamed, cast and crew alike.
I stared down at her limp form from thirty feet up. Her legs were twisted the wrong way. A pool of blood began to seep out of her. When I looked up again, I expected the thirteenth to be gone, but it wasn’t. With no eyes, it was also looking down at Erin. At what it had done.
And then, slowly, it turned towards me. On all fours, backwards, I scrambled away from it on the catwalk, terrified, not wanting to be next. The thirteenth’s shoulders shook rapidly, like a person laughing. But it made no sound. It never made a sound. Not going up the stairs of the orchestra pit. Not when it pushed Erin. And not as it climbed back down the ladder, rung by rung. I found myself alone on the catwalk.
Erin survived, somehow, paralyzed from the waist down. Apparently she fell on her legs, which, when you’re falling from thirty feet up, is a good thing. If she’d gone down head first, there was no chance. The show had to close, of course. When they lost Catalina a few weeks into rehearsal, she was replaceable. But with me refusing to go on, and Erin in the hospital, there was nothing to be done. I haven’t seen Erin since that day. I feel too guilty. But I was never arrested, so I guess she told the authorities that I didn’t push her. I don’t know what she told them. I don’t know what I would’ve told them, had they asked me.
I don’t do stage plays anymore. The family I used to nanny for gave me a star-studded recommendation, and now I make my living taking care of a five-year-old and a two-year-old for another filthy-rich family. I still act, but I only audition for film work.
I don’t even see plays these days. I won’t set foot in a theater. If the thirteenth had vanished off that catwalk, maybe things would be different. Maybe I could chalk it up to an extreme hallucination, some terrifying creature my mind brewed up to cope with the stress of the show and paying rent. Maybe I could even forget its bloody mess of viscera in the vague shape of a face.
But I saw it go down that ladder. Rung by fucking rung. And I know it’s still out there.
Erin was unlucky. Erin was a victim of being at the wrong place at the wrong time. And if I step inside a theater again, some way, somehow, I know the thirteenth will get me on another catwalk.
This time, I’ll be the one going over the railing.
And I’ve never once landed on my feet.

Sorry, I’ve never posted on Reddit before so forgive me if this is dumb or wrong I just felt like this was a safe space to get things off of my chest… (don’t read this unless you have nothing at all better to do, I didn’t realize how much I had to say… Lol)
My ex and I were together for 4 years… it’s been almost two weeks since we “broke up”… to me, the situation was small and stupid and I didn’t realize that she’d taken it serious, it almost feels as though she was reaching for a way out. We’ve dealt with so much together the fact that this was the end has me completely lost, hurt and confused.
We met in a virtual world (SecondLife) using avatars as people. Shortly after we met we exchanged numbers and instantly clicked. We were on the phone for HOURS and it stayed that way for about a year. I thought I’d finally found my person and she quickly became someone I’d considered my best friend. She came to visit me after about a year and it was perfect. I convinced my mom to let her come back to stay with us a few months later. It was AMAZING! I had my person with me all the time.
Unfortunately, things got a little rocky after living together for a while (my mini pet peeves: moving slowly, being lazy, not helping out around the house, seeing her butt crack constantly.. stupid things, lol) and she decided to go visit/take care of her grandma. After she left, we went back to long distance, phone calls/FaceTime and SecondLife. I appreciated the space but I still talked to her daily for hours. She ended up going back to her parents home because things weren’t so good with her grandma. After a while we broke up (might have lasted a week at most, it was over something so stupid I can’t even remember), during this week, her grandma passed away and once I found out we ended up going right back to how we were, on the phone/FaceTime/SecondLife almost like we never broke up. She was my person.
We kept it long distance for a while and during this time, I moved to another state for work. Things got rocky again and this involved virtual friends from SecondLife. Looking back, it is so dumb to have been able to affect us the way it did. We weren’t on the best terms but the fact that she was literally my best friend kept us together. We stuck together through everything. I invited her to come to my place for a while (the living situation wasn’t great at her parents place) hoping she could get on her feet and become independent… she came, it was cool but she never got on her feet. She was complacent sleeping on an air mattress in my living room (we were strained even more by this point). Her biggest complaint was my lack of affection… I thought it was due to the fact that she wasn’t trying to do better in life and that made it difficult for me to open up to her. (I later found out about a hormone imbalance that affected my libido and that was part of the problem that led to the lack of intimacy)
At the end of my contract, I decided I was moving back home and due to her living situation at her parents place I preferred for her to come back with me. I thought she’d have more opportunities to do better for herself (be in a safe and clean environment, get her GED, make more money, get on her feet, etc.) but after a year, that wasn’t the case. A few months ago, I gave up social media and SecondLife during a fast. She agreed to do the same so we could both focus on school and becoming better humans. Turns out, she was “sneaking” on SecondLife and Instagram hiding conversations with another girl…. It hurt… we fought and she agreed to let it go (her choice not mine) the next two months were amazing! We studied together, spent more time together, made plans for our future and were getting along really well and decided together we would go back to SecondLife. Part of our plans included me getting a health issue taken care of that would hopefully impact our intimacy in a positive way and I was looking forward to it. That was still her biggest complaint about our relationship.
One Saturday, she picked a fight because I didn’t say I love you too to a text she sent me. I told her that I wasn’t going to fight with her over something so stupid. I told her “I’m done, go if you want to go, stay if you want to stay idc” after this stupid argument, we literally went for ice cream together and everything was fine. Shortly after we got back from, an old friend reached out to her (related to the other girl she was having hidden conversations with) and suddenly everything switched. She asked me if I minded her getting online to hang with them and I didn’t understand why she asked when it was HER idea not to talk to them any further. I told her she made the choice to remove them and she cut me off stating that she only did that because of me. That made no sense to me because during the original argument I never suggested she did that by any means. The argument escalated in the dumbest way and she brought up my comment about her leaving earlier that day. I was confused because we were doing fine after all of that so I didn’t know why she brought that up. She asked me if I broke up with her and if I wanted her to leave and I sarcastically answered yes. She hung up with me and booked a plane ticket… I was livid because none of this made sense.
She then quit talking to me for the rest of the week. The night before her flight I reached out and asked was she happy to be going and she said yes. At that point I snapped. For the first time in 4 years I cursed her out. I felt she turned something so small and stupid into something so big. She didn’t deny anything, she agreed. I asked why a million times and she never answered. She left without saying anything the next morning.
We haven’t talked since. As soon as she was gone, she blocked me on all social media and removed me on SecondLife. The other day, someone sent me a screenshot of her Instagram post of her and another female avatar intimately on SecondLife …. I thought I was going to die…. She’d left me for a virtual person… that hurt to the core. It left me completely confused. I text her asking why again, she told me it didn’t matter, she didn’t want to talk and she was with someone else and happy. I kept asking why and she refused to talk to me and actually blocked my number too… (that sucks the most because the phone she’s using to communicate with the new girl is IN MY NAME and now I’m blocked from MY OWN PHONE) I feel like such an idiot and I just want to understand this. Idk what to do.
The surgery to handle the health issue is scheduled for this Thursday and I honestly hope I just die on the table. I miss her more than anything and I desperately want to understand why she discarded me so easily and quickly.

After a few altercations with a problematic Girlfriend (Bella) your close friend, Jake, needed to spend some time with friends so he called up You up (as your off duty at the time) and a few others just to hang-out and have fun, but just two days later it turns out that Jake’s Ex had a killing streak. A few days later as you get called in to work on a new case the person you see on the floor caught you off guard, as you look at the scene in front of you another friend of yours, Kyle, comes up to talk to you…
Kyle: Hey, you doin’ ok?
…
Kyle: That's good to hear.
…
Kyle: I’m doin’ fine thanks
…
Kyle: Yeah “What a scene!” is right! Creepy basement, Weird thing written in blood on the wall, just blood spatters everywhere, a pentagram made completely drawn out on the floor with a picture frame, car keys, a book, some random kitchen knife (looks like it’s been used quite frequently though), and a big lop of hair all placed on one of the five points on the pentagram. As if that weren't enough Jake's Ex lying dead on the floor with a knife sticking out of her chest with a shit ton of ash discoloring her clothes. Weird ass scene if you ask me.
…
Kyle: Yeah how DO we tell Jake about this?
…
Kyle: The keys? Yeah these are car keys I just said that are you even paying atte-
…
Kyle: Wait…your right these are the keys to Jake’s car, that uhhh… Bel-Air! right?
…
​
Kyle: Yeah. Just wait till we tell him this *sigh* he won’t take this well at all.
…
Kyle: Both his car keys being stolen and having to be taken in a evidence and his Ex committing suicide, he still loved her after all even with all the shit she put him through.
…
Kyle: I think you should tell him, after all you’ve known him the longest it might make him feel better if his childhood friend told him instead dontcha’ think?
Random officer: Ok everyone! Forensics are here and everyone else can leave, except you Kyle. We need your detective skills for this one!
Kyle: Welp you heard her, I’ll talk to you later buddy, but you better get on home take your mind off all…this and rest for the night, I’ll inform you of everything in the morning, sound good?
…
Kyle: Great now you best get on talk to you later
…
*Police chatter and sirens in the background*
*footsteps followed by a car door opening and closing as the listener gets in*
*Sounds of a car starting up and driving off as listener leaves*
*listener parks car and gets out opens the door to his house and walks in*
*Telephone rings and listener picks it up after a few rings*
…
Kyle: Hey! I know it’s a little soon, but we found a few major things that are pretty concerning one of those things being a Book of demonology, soul fusion, and transmutation/ possession along with finding a picture of all of us in that picture frame with everyone else's eyes “X” out with a sloppoly drawn heart on Jake and Bella’s head I think we all know what that means at least, but what I can figure out is what the books are for, I mean demonology that stuffs all made up isn’t it? Well anyway I’ll get back to you in the morning. I know you must be tired and You still gotta be the one to break this news to Jake and all that so I say sleep on it and do all that shit tomorrow. Have a good night buddy.
*Listener puts phone back on stand, gets underneath the covers, and falls asleep*
The end of part:1

Hi all— quick summary of my current poly situation: I am 27 F, engaged to/nesting partner of 28 F, and dating/have a BDSM dynamic with an older man (50M). This post is mostly about him, so for context he and I have a dom/sub dynamic, which is how our relationship started out, but we have also essentially become partners of some sort and are very good friends. We have been seeing each other, ranging from every other week to once or twice a week, since September. Probably important to point out that he has never done a poly thing before and for sure has an avoidant attachment style.
Here’s the situation currently, I am in a very stressed & heartbroken headspace and I feel totally lost about how to move forward: When we started seeing each other we had a clear agreement that we would discuss/inform each other of any new potential sexual partners/dating partners. In February, I saw something online that led me to believe he was seeing someone else which I had ZERO clue about. As in, he had updated his Fetlife bio and mentioned a new dynamic. Which stung, to find out through that. I confronted him, I was completely blindsided and heartbroken by the fact that he had been seeing/sleeping with someone else and didn’t tell me, it had happened a few times between Jan-Feb (according to him). He felt awful about it, profusely apologized, said he regretted doing it in the first place with her at all. I chose to forgive him and move forward, but I was clear that he had broken my trust and he told me he wouldn’t see her anymore in any capacity (I did not ask for that outright, though I suppose I was relieved).
Things have been going ok since then. I adore him, I’m hopelessly attached in a way that probably speaks to my Daddy issues more than anything, our dynamic has helped me work through so much trauma and I genuinely love and care for him outside of the BDSM dynamic. Although I live with my nesting partner, I also see him as a priority in my life.
Today, I just had this feeling. And I usually talk myself down from these gut feelings because I have a lot of relationship anxiety especially with this relationship. But I straight up asked him if he was seeing this same woman again… and he is. He claims they have not slept togethehooked up since my confrontation in February… I sort of believe him. I want to. But that they hang out as friends a couple times a week…. Which means he has been deceiving me about this fact while we are texting or when i call him etc for the last couple months. In response to this confrontation he says “you have someone at home. I don’t. I get lonely” and “you would have gotten upset if I told you”— both of these statements are true but they don’t excuse him lying to me (?). Oh, he also said I “don’t want him To have any friends” which is absolutely not true, I just have feelings about his friendship with this specific person because he lied about her in the first place.
I feel so sad and so lost.. I don’t know what to believe. What is fair to ask for here? Reality checks or any of your takes are welcome. Thank you for reading this

This story is about the time my JNMIL lost my three year old son, Michael.A Little Background -Michael (3) went to preschool with his best friend, Jacob (3) in the local high school. My MIL also worked at the same school.The Story -It was the day before Thanksgiving, my husband took the day off, and we decided to go Christmas shopping while Michael was at preschool. We had rushed through the store at record speed to find exactly what we needed, flew through the checkout and were on our way to pick up Michael. Unfortunately, traffic was not on our side that morning, and we realized that we were not going to make it for Michael's 11:40 pick-up. My husband called the school, and was transferred to his mom (she was a secretary for one of the administrators). Conversation goes like this;Husband - "Hi Mom, Katie and I are stuck in traffic and won't make to the school in time for Micheal's dismissal. Do you think you could walk over and pick him up? If you can't, we understand, we could just call the classroom and have them hold him..."MIL - "Of course I can pick him up!Husband - "Thanks Mom! If you want we can all go for lunch after"MIL - "That would be great, see you soon"Short, sweet, no one seemed confused about what was needed or expected, and if that was the case, I wouldn't be writing this story...We arrive at the school a few minutes before noon. We go through security and arrive at his mom's office. His mom is on the phone, and gestures for us to come in, and we realize that Michael is not in her office! She hangs up the phone.MIL - "Well, where should we go for lunch?"Husband - "Mom, where is Michael!?!?"MIL - ??? "I wouldn't know!"My husband and I run out of her office and straight to the preschool / Childhood development classroom (literally two doors away). After interrupting the current class, we explain what has happened, and hope that Michael is just waiting for us in his classroom. Unfortunately, he was not. Security was called and they started pulling all the student teachers back to the classroom, to figure out where Micheal was at. While I waited for the students, my husband started driving around the neighborhood to see if Michael decided he would walk home. My MIL, did nothing to help, she stayed in her office.After the student teachers started coming down to the classroom, one tells me that Michael and Jacob were telling everyone that they were going to have a 'sleepover' at Jacob's house, and that when I wasn't in the dropoff/pickup line they thought that maybe the boys were having a sleepover.I immediately call Risa, Jacob's mom. No answer, but I leave a message. Call my husband and tell him Michael is with Risa and Jacob. He comes back to the school. MIL is now asking, why we would allow Michael to sleepover at a friends house the night before Thanksgiving. We ignore her. I continue to call Risa, but no one is answering. Michael has been missing for over an hour at this point.Risa calls back and explains that she was called into work and that her sister picked up Jacob. Risa's says her sister took the boys to McDonald's and they were at Risa's house now.As we were leaving, MIL says, "Hey, I thought we were going out for lunch!"We stopped asking MIL to do anything with our children and Michael has gone extremely low contact with her.Edit - MIL played victim after we blew up at her. Claiming she didn't realize that class was dismissed (I mean bells ring at the end of class, pretty hard to miss). Then when we weren't buying that BS, doubled down with, "I thought you were going to pick him up and take me to lunch!" Then again played victim, "I told all my friends that I was going out to lunch with my son, and now I look bad." The next day, Thanksgiving, we were very cold towards her, and at dinner she just blurts out, "It's all your fault, if you hadn't been late then none of this would have happened!" Then gets up and fake cries. We left right after dinner.

I'm 2 for 2 bad experiences with Samsung support.
You need to allow at least 2 hours per call as they ask you 2 or 3 questions and then "put you on a short hold"
I had a user who had a fault with their monitor the user actually went through 5 of the 6 things Samsung suggested, and after 2 short holds which was around 3-5 minutes each time they suggested I reset something through the monitor menu.
Okay sure, user didn't try that. Samsung provide instructions I ask the user to test and let me know. The next day "tried the reset came in this morning and same issue"
From memory the issue was either flickering or blurriness that went away after some time after the monitor was powered off off overnight.
Well we tried the last thing on their list guess its warranty repair. That'll be open and shut. Spoiler it wasn't.
Given my experience calling I thought maybe the online chat will be better. It had to be slower I should have timed it. the whole interaction was close to 3 hours. Go through the same questions as the first call even though there was an existing case. And once again every few question I get put on "a short hold" which I didn't expect from a chat interaction but hey.
I've since decided the short hold is the level 1 customer support getting manager approval to go to the next step in the flowchart.
Well.... After answering the same questions I get to them believing it may be a hardware fault. They're going to send a technician to verify the problem. Not to fix. To Verify. Also if its not a genuine Samsung monitor charges apply etc. Lets ignore the fact that they asked for a photo of the monitor with the model and serial number to verify in our first interaction.
Sure lets go.
The technician shows up and is there for less than 5 minutes where he says "Yes, that's a known issue with these; (Part) needs to be replaced, they usually just replace the monitor.
If you think that's the end of my suffering you're mistaken.
That is only Part 1: Troubleshooting, now its Part 2 The Replacement!
Samsung have booked in delivery/courier company to ship the replacement monitor and provide details for how to return the faulty unit. Gave the users mobile for SMS alerts etc.
A few days later he gets an update via SMS that the shipment is complete. They follow up with me and there's no monitor. But he tells me they're pretty evenly located near 2 post offices so knowing which one would be helpful let alone having no shipping information other than it was the users name and address which might be enough.
So I call Samsung a 3rd time.
Lucky for me this ones much quicker, they escalate to their dispatch team who will call me back.
They make 2 attempts to call me both times I'm not available and they refuse to talk to any of my coworkers. "Please get him to call (phone number)".
No case reference, just call this number.
When I call back nobody can help me. I offer all the details I can, and they put me through to the correct team. I'm told by another team member that the person who tried to call is at lunch and they don't know which case its in relation to so cannot help further.
Callback later that day and I put what I'm doing on hold to talk to the person.
It turns out the courier company showed up at the warehouse and there were no units available so they said okay book in a pickup when you've got something available and flicked it back to Samsung who sat on it until... We said yes to trying again(?) - It didn't make sense to me so its hard to remember it right.
The good news is that delivery attempt #2 was successful.
In total, counting time I sat on hold trying to talk to their support and following up it was close to 7hrs of unbillable time that we can't on bill the client for.
Samsung make great products but their customer service is garbage!
I type this story knowing full well I'll be going through it again as I try to find definitive proof that there is a fault with this Samsung SSD NVMe 970 EVO that's causing bluescreens but passing all tests.
Last time I had a drive fault I had errors from HDTune error scan and the system sometimes wouldn't boot reporting no hard drive detected maybe 30% of the time and they still asked me to put the drive in another system to confirm. Flat out told them no and it still took 2-3 weeks for them to send the replacement. I had to send them the faulty drive first glad the client had another laptop to work from for those 3 weeks otherwise that could have been a problem!
-- Edited to put some spacing in, lost some like breaks.

So I recently got my own place after living with my father side of the family in Florida for 4 month before that I had moved lived at my mother house to take care of my little sister while my mother was deployed for a year. Two months after my mother come back from being deployed she kicked me out when I had no saving and just started a new job. It was not good for mw mental or emotional health to stay with my father side for to long which is why when I had enough saved I got my own place. But some unfortune things happened with my mother that has effect my financial stability in my new place and I have been struggling to keep up with bill and debts.
Since I moved in I have only be able to pay my 1500 rent on time once.
The middle of April I got sick and lost my job, and spent my saving to stay barely afloat in May until I found a new one, which thankful I did but it doesn't start to the 19th by then I'll be so far behind ill be playing catch up the entire year. I request the 3,000 to pay for my rent in full for the month of June and the to bill my rest to pay utility bills, gas, phone, internet, and buy groceries for the first time in two months.
Ideally the sooner the better if I can get any amount by the 19th I can start work with a solid plan to save and not live paycheck to paycheck.
I appreciate anyone talking the time to read this, I don't have the best writing ability so hopefully this was clear and understand able enough, even if you decide to donate .50cent I am so incredibly gratefully.

Just in bed. Thinking about how dry my phone will be when i wake up because i don’t really have any friends🥲.
If you’re reading this and want someone who’s going to stick around, you’re in the right place. I have made one close friend from here and we have been in touch for over more than a year. That’s what i am looking for, just to make things clear. Would love to talk to people from my community (lgbt+) as well.
I am not into a lot of things, but i am sure we’ll have at least something in common. I am patient and understanding and will be there for you in times of need.
Do what you will with this :)

NYC based
I don’t have many friends in New York anymore and the ones I do have I only see occasionally because of our schedules. A few best friends moved away and I lost a lot of friends when I stopped heavily drinking. So even tho I’m currently sad cuz of a break up, I want to start thinking about meeting more new people and having fun. Most of my friends in NY are friends from college and their close friends/partners.
I’m shy and generally mind my business which is not great for meeting new people. I was even recently at a party and saw a few hot guys who I wanted to talk to but I was too nervous they were straight and didn’t even know how to approach them. I am much better when the other person approaches me, but I know this is something I need to work on. Any pointers here would be appreciated. I’m not totally lost at parties if I know people tho. I’ve met some people who are Instagram friends but that’s it. My romantic partners have all been made on the apps :(
But I also just need some ideas on where to meet more queer people who want to be friends. I want friends who want to go dancing,hang out in the park, try that new cocktail bar, go to the movies or theatre, etc. If things develop romantically that’s ok but I’m not looking for sex, I legit just want more friends so I can stop doing things solo. I go out less cuz none of my friends want to go, which becomes this self fulfilling loop of not meeting new friends or lovers.
I’ve been in on going acting classes but no one goes out after or anything. I go to workout classes but no one really talks to each other. And I go to the gym 3-4 days a week and see the same people but no one’s ever said hi. And again I’d like queer friends, don’t need anymore straight people in my life hah.
Any advice on where to meet friends and/or advice on how to go from small talk to actual friend?

Email marketing is one of the most powerful and effective tools in a marketer’s arsenal. It is a tried-and-tested strategy that has stood the test of time and remains a cornerstone of any successful marketing campaign. In today’s digital world, where everyone is bombarded with countless messages on social media, email marketing provides a way to reach out to your audience directly, in a personalized and targeted manner. Whether you’re a beginner or an experienced marketer, this beginner’s guide to effective email marketing will help you understand the key principles and best practices that will help you get the most out of your email marketing campaigns.

What is email marketing?

Email marketing is a digital marketing strategy that involves sending promotional messages and commercial content to a group of individuals via email. This marketing technique aims to increase brand awareness, promote lead generation, and drive online sales. To effectively implement an email marketing campaign, a business needs to have an email service provider like Trafficwave.
With the help of an email service provider, businesses can design and send emails that are tailored to their audience’s interests and needs. This helps to increase open rates and conversion rates, ultimately leading to more sales. Email marketing is a cost-effective way to reach customers and potential customers directly, without relying on third-party platforms like social media.
Overall, email marketing is an essential tool for any business looking to increase their online sales and engage with their customers on a more personal level. By leveraging the power of email campaigns, businesses can establish stronger relationships with their audience, drive traffic to their website, and ultimately boost their revenue.

The benefits of email marketing

Email marketing can have a significant impact on your business, and the benefits are numerous. First, email marketing is a highly effective way to generate leads. By sending targeted messages to your subscribers, you can attract potential customers to your website and encourage them to take action.
Another benefit of email marketing is that it can drive traffic to your website. By including links to your website in your emails, you can encourage subscribers to visit your site and explore your products or services further.
If you’re looking to increase online sales, email marketing is a great tool to help you do so. By creating email campaigns that are specifically designed to convert subscribers into customers, you can significantly increase your online sales and boost your revenue.
In short, the benefits of email marketing are clear. It can help you generate leads, drive traffic to your website, and increase online sales. So if you’re not already using email marketing to promote your business, it’s time to get started.

Understanding your audience

Before you can begin crafting effective emails, it’s crucial to understand who you’re communicating with. Knowing your audience will help you tailor your messaging to their needs and interests, ultimately increasing the effectiveness of your email campaigns.
One key element of understanding your audience is lead generation. This involves identifying potential customers or clients and capturing their contact information so you can continue to communicate with them through email. Lead generation can be accomplished through a variety of methods, such as offering a free ebook or white paper in exchange for a person’s email address, hosting a webinar or event and collecting attendee contact information, or simply having a sign-up form on your website.
Once you have a list of email contacts, you can begin to segment your audience based on characteristics such as demographics, location, and past interactions with your business. This allows you to tailor your emails to specific groups and increase their relevance and effectiveness.
By understanding your audience and utilizing lead generation tactics, you can create targeted email campaigns that resonate with your subscribers and drive engagement and conversions.

Building an email list

One of the most important aspects of email marketing is building a high-quality email list. After all, your emails won’t be effective if they aren’t reaching the right people. Here are some tips for building an email list that will deliver results:

1. Provide value: Offer something valuable to your audience in exchange for their email address. This could be a discount code, a free ebook or whitepaper, or exclusive access to content.
   
2. Use sign-up forms: Add sign-up forms to your website, social media pages, and other digital channels. Make sure they’re easy to find and fill out, and be transparent about what subscribers can expect to receive.
   
3. Run a contest: A contest or giveaway is a great way to encourage people to sign up for your email list. Just make sure the prize is relevant to your business and will attract your target audience.
   
4. Partner with other businesses: Collaborate with other businesses or influencers in your industry to co-promote each other’s email lists. This can help you reach a wider audience and build credibility.
   
5. Attend events: If you attend events, conferences, or trade shows, make sure you have a sign-up sheet available for people to join your email list. Be sure to follow up with new subscribers promptly.
   

Remember, building an email list is an ongoing process. Make sure you’re consistently adding new subscribers and engaging with your existing ones to keep your email list fresh and effective.

Crafting effective emails

Once you have a solid understanding of your audience and have built a quality email list, it’s time to craft effective emailsthat will engage your subscribers and encourage them to take action. Here are some tips for creating effective emails:

1. Keep it simple and concise: Your emails should be easy to read and understand. Avoid using jargon or complicated language and get straight to the point. Keep your emails short and sweet, with only the necessary information.
   
2. Personalize your emails: Personalized emails have been shown to have higher open rates and engagement levels. Use your subscriber’s name in the subject line or body of the email and tailor your message to their interests or past behavior.
   
3. Use attention-grabbing subject lines: Your subject line is the first thing your subscribers will see, so make it count. Use a subject line that is interesting, compelling, and relevant to the content of the email.
   
4. Include a call-to-action: The goal of your email is to encourage your subscribers to take action. Make sure you include a clear call-to-action in your email that tells them what to do next.
   
5. Use images and visuals: Including images or visuals in your email can make it more visually appealing and help break up text. However, make sure your images are high-quality and relevant to the content of the email.
   
6. Test and optimize: As with any marketing strategy, testing and optimization are key. Try out different subject lines, email content, and calls-to-action to see what works best for your audience. Use analytics to track the success of your emails and make adjustments as needed.
   

Crafting effective emails takes time and practice, but with the right approach, your emails can be a powerful tool for driving engagement and conversions.

Automating your email campaigns

One of the most appealing aspects of email marketing is its potential for automation. By setting up automated email campaigns, you can save time and ensure that your audience receives timely, relevant content without requiring constant attention from your team.
Automated emails can take many forms, from welcome messages for new subscribers to birthday greetings to abandoned cart reminders. To get started with automation, you’ll first need to identify the triggers that will prompt your emails to send. For example, a welcome email might be triggered when someone subscribes to your list, while an abandoned cart reminder might be triggered when a customer leaves items in their online shopping cart without completing the purchase.
Once you’ve identified your triggers, it’s time to set up your campaigns. Most email marketing platforms offer automation features that make it easy to create workflows for your automated emails. These workflows typically involve setting up a series of emails that will be sent at specific intervals, based on your trigger criteria.
When creating your automated emails, it’s important to keep your audience in mind. Make sure the content of each email is tailored to their interests and needs, and consider how each email will fit into the larger customer journey. By mapping out your email campaigns in advance, you can ensure that each message is relevant, timely, and impactful.
Of course, automation doesn’t mean you should set it and forget it. Regularly reviewing and tweaking your automated campaigns can help ensure they continue to drive results. Look at your open and click-through rates, and make adjustments as needed to optimize your campaigns for success.
Overall, automation is a powerful tool that can help you streamline your email marketing efforts and reach your audience more effectively. By investing the time and effort to set up effective automated campaigns, you can build stronger relationships with your subscribers and drive more revenue for your business.

Measuring success with analytics

One of the biggest advantages of email marketing is the ability to measure your success with analytics. Unlike other forms of marketing, you can see exactly how your emails are performing, and make adjustments accordingly. Here are some metrics to pay attention to:

1. Open rate – This is the percentage of people who opened your email. A low open rate may indicate that your subject line or sender name needs work.
   
2. Click-through rate – This is the percentage of people who clicked on a link within your email. A low click-through rate may mean that your call-to-action (CTA) isn’t compelling enough.
   
3. Conversion rate – This is the percentage of people who took the desired action (e.g. making a purchase, filling out a form) after clicking through from your email. If your conversion rate is low, consider optimizing your landing page or CTA.
   
4. Bounce rate – This is the percentage of emails that couldn’t be delivered to your subscribers. A high bounce rate could mean that your list needs cleaning up.
   
5. Unsubscribe rate – This is the percentage of people who unsubscribe from your emails. While it’s natural to feel discouraged by unsubscribes, it’s important to remember that a smaller, engaged list is better than a large, uninterested one.
   

By tracking these metrics, you can identify what’s working and what’s not, and make data-driven decisions to improve your email marketing campaigns. Just be sure not to get too bogged down in the numbers – ultimately, the most important metric is whether or not your emails are helping you achieve your business goals.

Best practices for email marketing

1. Personalize your emails: Address your subscribers by name and segment your list based on their interests to make sure the content they receive is relevant to them.
   
2. Keep your emails concise: People’s attention spans are short, so keep your emails to the point. Use short paragraphs and break up content with headings, bullet points, and images.
   
3. Make it visually appealing: Use high-quality images and graphics that complement your brand and message. Ensure your emails are mobile-responsive and easy to read on all devices.
   
4. Use a clear call-to-action: Encourage your subscribers to take action by using clear, compelling language and prominent buttons or links.
   
5. Test your emails: Use A/B testing to see which subject lines, content, and CTAs perform best. This will help you improve the effectiveness of your email campaigns.
   
6. Respect your subscribers’ preferences: Give your subscribers control over how often they receive emails and what type of content they receive. This will help you reduce unsubscribes and keep your list engaged.
   
7. Keep your email list clean: Regularly remove inactive or unengaged subscribers to ensure your email list is up-to-date and accurate.
   

By following these best practices, you can create effective email campaigns that engage your audience, increase conversions, and help grow your business.
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