Being in love ain t easy

Hello Everyone, I apologize in advance, because this is probably going to be a long post, but I’m kind of in a jam and i’m not sure what to do. If you take the time to read through this, I really appreciate it.
So I recently proposed to my girlfriend of 5 years, and she said yes! We’re super excited to be getting married, and have been doing a lot of wedding planning here recently, even though our wedding will be September of next year. (Thats just the kind of people we are).
So to get into everything, there has been something that has been bugging me the last few days, and I don’t know what to do or think about it, and was hoping to get some pointers or advice on it from a neutral source.
To give the situation context, I grew up on the west coast, and now live in the southeast. I spent some time in the mid south as well. Two of my best friends (since first grade) both live on the west coast. When we got engaged, one of the two messaged me and congratulated us, the other one did not. No big deal, he was probably busy.
Fast forward to last weekend, we had already put our wedding parties together, and were mailing our (what we’ll call) notifications to them to let them know. I had messaged the two best friends for their address, one got back to me pretty quickly, and the other (we’ll call him Sam) hasn’t even opened the message (I did it on snapchat and iMessage).
I literally had to go on google earth to find his address (I know where he lives, just not the actual address). I found it of course and have since mailed all of the notifications.
I told the guy who will be my best man this, and basically he said that if Sam can't even reply to a text asking for his address, then he wouldn't even have him as a part of the wedding party. He also mentioned that he doubts I'll hear back from him with the letter, and that if I do, he'll probably make some excuse for not being able to make it, even though he has well over a year to plan. (Which he is not wrong, he has done that in the past in other situations.) He also doesn't know Sam, he has only heard about him, they have never met. He also asked me when the last time I heard from Sam was, and I told him it was August of last year, and although i've texted him and other methods of contact, I haven't heard back since.
I say all of this, but I still don't know how to feel, part of me agrees with what what my best man said, I mean if he can't even reply to a text, do I really expect him to make arrangements to fly across the country, rent a suit and be in my wedding? The other part of me knows that if excluded him from my wedding party, then it would be a whole other situation, and I genuinely love this guy like a brother, he has been there for me countless times, and I was originally going to have Sam as my best man.
I'm not sure what to do, think or say, I don't want to get my hopes up and then him not show up and I just be SOL. My Fiancé and I already have back ups for our wedding party, just incase, but I ask, what would you do in this situation? Would you go ahead and replace him in the party and still invite him, or would you wait it out to see. I know it's still early, and we have plenty of time, but i'm not sure. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
I apologize again for the lengthy post, and thank you again if you read through it.

If you remember my X and I purchased the four unit she's been living in for the past 10 years. My daughter got married and lives near Springfield MA. Grand kids soon. I'm looking to relocate to Albany as my final move. Semi-retired and looking to fully cut the work cord soon. I've been looking in Center Square and there's literally nothing. I'd be ok with a condo or another income property where I would live in one of the units. What is available is trash at premium pricing. I'm thinking of broadening my search area but I really like Center Square. I just lost one that I put in an offer on. I think it was because they thought I was going to be a absentee landlord which is not thecase.
I'd love to hear any insight you might have on the market in general and other areas to consider. I'm open to a ranch style a little out although my preference would be a Condo. There's a fe Condos avalable on Chapel and Monroe that are nice on the interior but look out at a parking lot.
If you know anyone getting ready to sell that would be great. It would be a cash deal so no bank involvement.
Thanks

Often in this sub or talking with other people, I always heard: “Don’t move to Portugal it’s a shitty place, don’t go to Ireland the weather is so bad, don’t go to the US political there is an issue, don’t go to Australia Australians are so rude, UK is a shifty place, Canada is becoming a shithole”
If you see there’s no place on earth that have all the advantageous, all places have problems. But I found funny because a lot of Americans says US is shit and they’re gonna move to Portugal because it’s way better, I know a lot of Portuguese (me included) that left the country to “better places”, people from UK and Ireland that moved to Australia and NZ because lifestyle there is way better, Australians that left the place to Canada because Canada is way better.
I think we should be more grateful for the countries we were part of or raised, since majority of this examples are first world countries, they have their own problems of course but we are waaay more lucky than people than born in Africa or poor Asia or South American countries. We have a lot of opportunities and security that those counties don’t have and we should think in a more positive way about how good this countries are rather than the negative part.

Hello Everyone, I apologize in advance, because this is probably going to be a long post, but I’m kind of in a jam and i’m not sure what to do. If you take the time to read through this, I really appreciate it.
So I recently proposed to my girlfriend of 5 years, and she said yes! We’re super excited to be getting married, and have been doing a lot of wedding planning here recently, even though our wedding will be September of next year. (Thats just the kind of people we are).
So to get into everything, there has been something that has been bugging me the last few days, and I don’t know what to do or think about it, and was hoping to get some pointers or advice on it from a neutral source.
To give the situation context, I grew up on the west coast, and now live in the southeast. I spent some time in the mid south as well. Two of my best friends (since first grade) both live on the west coast. When we got engaged, one of the two messaged me and congratulated us, the other one did not. No big deal, he was probably busy.
Fast forward to last weekend, we had already put our wedding parties together, and were mailing our (what we’ll call) notifications to them to let them know. I had messaged the two best friends for their address, one got back to me pretty quickly, and the other (we’ll call him Sam) hasn’t even opened the message (I did it on snapchat and iMessage).
I literally had to go on google earth to find his address (I know where he lives, just not the actual address). I found it of course and have since mailed all of the notifications.
I told the guy who will be my best man this, and basically he said that if Sam can't even reply to a text asking for his address, then he wouldn't even have him as a part of the wedding party. He also mentioned that he doubts I'll hear back from him with the letter, and that if I do, he'll probably make some excuse for not being able to make it, even though he has well over a year to plan. (Which he is not wrong, he has done that in the past in other situations.) He also doesn't know Sam, he has only heard about him, they have never met. He also asked me when the last time I heard from Sam was, and I told him it was August of last year, and although i've texted him and other methods of contact, I haven't heard back since.
I say all of this, but I still don't know how to feel, part of me agrees with what what my best man said, I mean if he can't even reply to a text, do I really expect him to make arrangements to fly across the country, rent a suit and be in my wedding? The other part of me knows that if excluded him from my wedding party, then it would be a whole other situation, and I genuinely love this guy like a brother, he has been there for me countless times, and I was originally going to have Sam as my best man.
I'm not sure what to do, think or say, I don't want to get my hopes up and then him not show up and I just be SOL. My Fiancé and I already have back ups for our wedding party, just incase, but I ask, what would you do in this situation? Would you go ahead and replace him in the party and still invite him, or would you wait it out to see. I know it's still early, and we have plenty of time, but i'm not sure. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
I apologize again for the lengthy post, and thank you again if you read through it.

Are there any songs that have similar feel. For ex- lasted for a short while, pining, waiting or even one sided love. Something like enchanted by taylor swift and Atlantis or Sweet night by V.

It looks like a good amount of top pros won’t be playing DDO. (Eagle, Simon, Paul, James Proctor, James Conrad, Niklas Anttila, Vaino Makela) Mcbeth and the other Europeans are going to be playing in Europe. But the rest seem to just be skipping it for no good reason. Anyone know why. Most of those skipping are registered For Des Moins the week after.

I grew up a latch key kid. Both my parents were hardly around and when they were it was pretty much stay out of their way.
Most of my issues I placed on my mother. As she had an obvious favourite child and it wasn’t me. I always thought I got a long with my dad it was just a shame he worked so much. But he I never blamed him.
He would always make himself seem like the tough guy. And if anyone ever hurt one of his kids he would be in jail for murder. He would threaten all my sisters boyfriends to the point where I didn’t bring mine home just to avoid that.
Fast forward, I was married to a man who was abusive for 13 years. I came over to his house covered in his bruises and he said nothing. I ended up leaving my ex. My father still remains friends with him. They have poker nights and go golfing.
All my life I blamed my mom for being neglectful and not there for me. But it turns out I have two shitty parents who are all talk and don’t really care about me. It’s all for show.
I have really worked hard to have a relationship with my parents in the past decade, after cutting them off for 5 years when I moved out. I have kids who love them and their cousins. And I feel like I can’t just walk away. And I desperately want to.
I read on this sub all the time how there is usually one parent people blame more, and lesson the blow on the other parent. I feel like it is a facade. A parent who loves and cares for you wouldn’t let another parent neglect you like that (if they are together). They are just as guilty.

How it happened.
I was 16 and my girlfriend was 15. We were both in high-school. For the sake of incrimination I’m going to use fake names. Her name was Lucy. I’m going to call her that as it’s the closest thing to Lucifer as she showed me that she was definitely possessed by it.
She grew up with her friends Karen and Meredith. Since kindergarten. I was diagnosed with ODD and ADHD at a very young age. I moved around a lot. I mean, a lot. Until I went to their school in 2014, I had been to 9 different schools in the surrounding area due to being bullied.
With that said, you can understand a bit more context. I was new to this school, before I went into highschool. I began to cut myself the first year of that school, and met a girl who had similar issues as me. Just a bad upbringing. We were similar in the sense we were both a little messed up. This one was Meredith. We talked for a very long time. Shy to eachother in person, but always texted every single night. Her best friend growing up was Lucy. Inseparable those 2. Later on down the line highschool began. I built the courage to ask her on a proper date. We went to the movies. A few months after that she started dating this wannabe gangster fellow. Wore all red from head to toe. It broke my heart she would do that, and I went to Lucy for advice. That same night Lucy kissed me. I realized I liked her back. Her and I started dating and it pissed Meredith off. She didn’t talk to me for months. Lucy and I were our first. We had sex almost every day, going out for lunch during break and going to my house. For about 6 months straight. Then she cheated on me. I caught her at the graveyard with another guy and confronted them. I said things like I would slit his throat and he got scared and ran off. Lucy said I was fucked in the head.
Soon after I messaged Meredith about it, as they were best friends. Meredith met up with me that night. Cheating on her boyfriend with me. I began dating Meredith after she dumped her boyfriend. Karen got transferred to our highschool about 5 months into mine and Meredith’s relationship. Meredith cheated on me with my old friend from the trailer park. I walked in on them one night. Smashed a bottle and told the guy I was going to bury him outside. Realized I didn’t want to go to jail, I put the bottle down and walked out and went home. Karen messaged me that night. Asked if I was okay. Saying no she asked to meet up with me. We met up and I showed how upset I was. She kissed me then. Probably out of pity. I asked her out about 3 weeks later as I was lonely and needed someone. She became friends with Meredith and Lucy which I found strange. Very strange. As a young kid I told her that I didn’t want her to hang around them anymore and she told me I can’t make her. Which I couldn’t, I just accepted it. They hung out a lot. Which made me suspicious. Soon after Karen began talking sexual to me. I did the same, being a teenager.
She said things like she wants to be tied up and left marks on her. She seduced me one night and asked for all of it. Verbally asked for it. The day after we had school. It was like any other day. I was in class on the computer talking to her through Facebook. The conversation was normal. Until it wasn’t. She warned me. Said “oh by the way, me and Lucy are charging you with rape” I laughed and said “lmao” and she said “I’m not kidding” panic set in. Not even an hour later police came to my classroom and escorted me to the principles office. There I saw through the glass both of them fake crying. I was handcuffed and treated like a terrorist locked in a room inside the school. I was asked questions without my rights being told to me or even a parent or guardian present.
I was charged with 3 counts of sexual assault. As Meredith sneakily did the same. They planned this on me.
I took it to trial. Court went on for 4 years. So long that they were going to charge me as an adult even though it supposedly happened when I was 15. I had a lot of evidence against them such as text receipts and the fact they tried to do this to another guy in which they redacted their statement without any repercussions
It got so bad that a female officer I suspect one that they went to, attempted to withhold my evidence in court and was found doing so. She didn’t lose her job but got demoted to traffic officer I was told by my lawyer. I was found innocent in 2020 but after it was done and over with, they went around my town and told everyone that I raped them. For 6 years I was assaulted by people throwing stuff at me by driving by, called a rapist by hundreds of people, threatened, my house was paintballed, my brothers truck had gotten his windows smashed out. And now I’m very mentally fucked up.
Reddit is lagging too bad so I can’t type any more. It’s taking a long time for my words to be written. In conclusion I just wanted to share my story. Get it off my chest as I have been living with this for a long time.

First off - I am an idiot. I knew better. Typically I take him to work as he doesn’t have a license - but I’ve been feeling really sick the past few days and asked him to take himself.
I have yet to speak to him to find out what exactly happened (concussion and has been incoherent and confused since he got home, he’s now asleep.)- but it appears he was in a crash where he was at fault. I have comprehensive full coverage. But what do I do? What steps do I take? I don’t even know where my car is - the police have yet to contact me - they wouldn’t even let me back at the hospital or tell me if he was okay - the only way I knew something happened was we share locations and his was at the hospital and he wasn’t answering his phone. They let him out of the hospital and as this is his second major brain injury he was a disaster - had no recollection of what happened - and kept trying to get back into the hospital from a side door and kept asking where my car was. It was terrifying, truly. When I asked they stated he was fine to be released. They ran a ct and it appeared okay. He does not seem okay. I will likely take him to another hospital if he wakes up and is still incoherent.
In regards to insurance and getting my items out of the car and ensuring the other drivers are okay and receive compensation from my insurance - what do I do? I feel horrible and I just want to make this right. I’m terrified my insurance won’t cover it as he has no license and I made the dumbest choice in the world.

I’m sorry if I hurt you. You see, I’ve never ever wanted to hurt you or cause you pain, and I wanted to help save some of your problems, be some sunshine in your dark days. Your problems. They took up every ounce of oxygen in the room. Your anger. Your hatred. Your slights. Your perceived issues. Did you even know what your issues were? Did you literally know or was it just anger, jealousy, your desire to be the most important thing all the time, whether you earned it or not? Was it constant vigilance at protecting anything that made you look bad? Is that why we all had to seem normal on the outside but broken, heartbroken, and shamed on the inside? We couldn’t make you look bad no matter how much you hurt us. And you never thanked us for that. You just pushed and pushed and pushed us to sweep it under the rug, because there were more important things to do like kiss your ass at all times. Placate you. Your ego was never filled. It was 100% about you at all times, all the oxygen was to be about you. When you felt good, or in a good mood, you were okay, but it was quick to be enjoyed, and truth be told, I cannot come up with one memory of you being happy, because you easily insulted, by anyone anywhere, almost like feeling happy wasn’t your mode, you needed to be angry, insulted, irritated, because then you can go back to your comfort zone: righteous hatefulness.
No matter what I did, it didn’t matter. No matter what I was, it didn’t matter.
I didn’t matter. My secret mattered.
The secret that made you look bad of all bad. The secret that metastasized for 40 years. You hurt people over my secret. The secret that was used as a weapon to hurt me more by others. The secret that you could use as a way to control people. Walking around Dad’s funeral telling people not to tell me. Shame on you. You hurt me over this secret in so many ways. More than what the secret was.
I didn’t matter.
Your ego mattered.
You had more secrets than just mine. You’ve exacted so much pain and chaos on so many people in 75 years.
And you will never understand how awful it feels that I didn’t matter enough, ever.
You will never understand how that feels because you exist to ensure that whether by force or manipulation, you will always matter more than anyone else.
The coercion of others, the keeping me in the dark, the constant shame on me, all to fucking save your own ego. To prevent you from feeling shame. To prevent you from having to say I’m sorry I did this to you, and you deserve better. All to prevent you from looking bad and facing the consequences of your actions. You NEVER faced accountability about anything, ever. Moving on from one slight to the next, causing chaos and pain, pitting your children against each other, because then it’s all so big and there is so much pain from every direction, that no one could possibly focus on one thing and when I was exhausted and broken, and not wanting to fight anymore, the only thing left to do was to placate, try to forgive, and move on. Rest before the next fight, which is surely not far behind the last one. It’s exhausting having to fight all the fights all the time.
I gave up on you before I even learned my secret. When I found out, I had no more empathy and forgiveness to give. I learned the truth about me by a stab in the back, and not even by you, but my sister. A ploy to get me to go back to you. More betrayal. Family feels like an illusion now.
I had to nail shut all the doors. I had no more empathy and forgiveness left.
What a thing, chaos and pain all the time, for what? Your ego. God, it feels so childish.

Hey guys,
Finally got a binder the other day, long overdue. I’m very happy with how the top fits, however it’s quite tight at the bottom. As the old, very well-known saying goes, “if my ribs can’t expand in it, I ain’t wearin’ it, bucko.” 🤠
It’s really just the lower part that’s the issue, since my ribs are widest at the bottom. I’m concerned that if I swap it for a larger size, it won’t compress me enough at the top.
I plan to add a triangular dart of extra fabric on each side. Does that say “good idea” or “horrible mistake” to you?
Better yet, does anyone know a better method of upsizing?
Thanks! :)

Hi guys! As the title says, my pharmacy miscounted my ADHD medication. It was a 30 day supply and I should have seven more than I do. Unfortunately, I figured this out when I noticed I only had two pills in my bottle left & my pharmacy refused to fill it. After doing the math, I should absolutely have a weeks worth more of pills than I do. I really need this to focus, especially in my field, so when I went to the pharmacy to talk to them about it I was sent away. I know that there is an ADHD medication shortage and the medicine itself is heavily regulated, I just don’t know what to do now. (It doesn’t feel great that we’re assumed to be like addicted to the medicine…but I also get it) I could really use any advice on how to resolve this or if y’all know how to stay focused during this upcoming week that would be fantastic!

Y'all really out here just showing open racism, this isn't thinly veiled, this isn't about the actress "not being Scandinavian" I guarantee that each and every one of you that takes issue with race is just because she is black and not white. If she was white none of y'all would have batted and eye and likely just complained about the live action move in general.
There are things to dislike about the concept of a live action movie, don't get me wrong. But this is a fantasy world, but even beyond that, there ARE RECORDS OF BLACK VIKINGS! "Oh but it's not like the source material" the source material isn't even like the source material, Astrid didn't even exist in the books.
Who cares if she is black? You shouldn't, and if you do then you need to do some self examination and ask yourself what is wrong with you. Why is your knee jerk reaction to recoil and complain about "black washing" (that is just you being racist fyi.) If she can act, why complain, why whine about it.
And I am not saying y'all are racists, I am saying that your attitudes are racist, you are displaying racism. I had higher hopes for this community, do better.

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I have told her practically a million times “don’t tell me to do chores, I physically shut down from them” and she never listens. Anytime it’s my brother discussing anything with his autism, it’s “oh baby of course what can I do to help 🥺🥺” but when I say “I have pathological demand avoidance, if you give me demands I physically cannot complete them and will end all productivity” she just huffs that I need to get over myself, despite knowing I’m autistic too.
I had today planned all week, I’ll do my washing, hang it out, pack my clothes for my holiday, deal with my trash, and play games while I wait for the washing cycles. She interrupted me saying “you need to deal with your bin, it’s overflowing” and now I’m sat on the floor in tears because I can’t get myself to do it anymore. I don’t have another spare day until after my fucking holiday it had to be done today, and I can’t fucking do it now

16M from Poland (now living in the UK) looking for some new friends on this server. Met some interesting people here before, so I thought I would try again. My interests include: sports, motorsports, reading and travelling. Hopefully we can be friends! Don’t mind about age or gender either.

I have been seriously fishing (on my own, own tackle, all that good shit) for roughly 2-3 months. In that time i have had hooked a number of fish one huge carp who managed to escape just after getting him in the net, and about a 1ft pike who fought like hell and unhooked as well. I'm loving life even just hooking the fish (especially on lures) really gives me a rush...well enough to keep me coming back.
Anyway, the other night i go to my favourite spot, loads of trout and apparently a couple pike and perch and I hooked something! it looked like a fish, but wasn't fighting and my hook was not in its mouth. obviously being green got worried/interested what i had done. brought it up to the bank and there it was, a DEAD, DECOMPOSING HALF OF A FISH. Has anyone else done this before? is it bad luck? should i stop fishing there?
​
(also can upload a photo for any sikkos that wanna see)