Printable eagle scout congratulations letter

***Hello,As so many on here demand, when sending your FIRST DM please include your Name, Location, Age and a photo. Please do not just message hi.*** I am only interested in something longterm with the right person. I am in no way shape or form looking for, flings, one night stands, to be 1 of 12 in your rotation etc. Please no games or drama, that stuff was ok 20 years ago lol. I honestly am leaning towards NO children as I find it near impossible to find someone to take out for coffee, let alone have a child with. So atm anything child related is a hard pass unless for some reason you are in fact so different from everyone else that you completely change my outlook on life, then and only then can we perhaps entertain the thought of children ( this also includes people that currently have children, no thanks). I do work full time, just starting a new job. I do enjoy to cook and bbq and would love someone who is also capable of cooking and or can bring something new to the table. I am looking for the ride or die type, someone I dont have to walk on eggshells around, someone who doesnt support the alphabet army or go along with any of those mainstream woke psychosis. Someone with a great and very dark sense of humor, you can take it and give it right back. Just someone who's fun, likes to travel, and actually wants to build a life together.-------------------Hard NO's; 1. Cigarette smokers 2. heavy drinkers 3. History of physical / sexual abuse 4. mens haircuts 5. Anyone remotely close to any possible viral clip you can imagine 6. Single moms 7. New Profiles / BRAND NEW accounts 8. --------------------Please be 420 friendlyComedians : Tom Segura, Dave Chapelle, Jim Norton, Bill Burr, Tim Dillon aka The Pig, Mark Normand, Christina P, Ali Wong, Joe Rogan, William Montgomery aka the big red machine, kill tony, etc to name a few--------------------Shows : Trailer park boys, Letter kenney, simpsons, forensic files ( anything crime related especially serial killer documentaries ), Brooklyn 99, schitts creek, Seinfeld, southpark, breaking bad, better call Saul, Shoresy , Paradise PD, Brickleberry, Banshee, Ozarks blah blah---------------------Music : literally all over the place, mostly prefer metal / edm , changes by mood.---------------------variety of podcasts : YMH, Radio Rental, Crime Junkie, Tim Dillon show, Congratulations, stuff you should know, All over the road, tuesdays with stories, park after dark , Ramsey show, JRE, chip chipperson , Haiyaa with Nigel Eng, long days, history hyenas etc

Zlan is a big esport (multi gaming) tournament in France with over 50K cashprice.
A few weeks ago, the 2023 Clan took place with Northgard on the menu!!! Shiro games even added the observer mode at the request of Zerator for the event.
So the game was played twice: during qualifiers in 2v2v2v2 format (see https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HXYEfGe3q5M ), but also during the grand final between the 2 best players of the tournament: Oslo and Lockness. They played 1 map against each other, and even if the commentary is in French, and to be honest, both the casters and the players do not have the best competitive level ever, I think the game was fun to watch and I wanted to share some highlights with timestamps with you!
Link to the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WYsnsCDp0iY
Timestamps and highlights:

23:00 Alphacast (RTS specialist caster) enters the scene to cast with Zerator.
24:28 Presentation of the rules for this game (hard mode, random small map, all victory conditions available).
28:40 Start of the game Eagle (Oslo in brown) spawns South. Iron/wheat, fish/ruin/sheeps, stone/wreck and Lore next to his starting position. Horse (Lockness in purple) spawns North. Stone/wheat, Iron/Forest/sheeps, Fish/deers and Lore/wreck next to spawn. Map is Yggdrasil with Myrkalfar and Jotunn in the middle. Oslo is favourite after training results.
33:15 Loremaster dies to wolf attack… saaaaaad.
33:35 Some nice tile dancing with axe throwers to clear wolves
37:45 First winter
38:24 Nice positioning and micro of Grif inside of the geyser to mess up with Draugrs AI.
40:48 Spring 801
42:33 Horse reaches 200 fame.
43:25 Eagle has cleaned all the way to Horse territory. Horse stays in defence and starts building tower off screen, the axe throwers camp and then healers hut. While we don’t have an overview right at this moment, they both have similar villagers count and their armies are comparable: Grif + Bodyguard + 2 axe throwers for Eagle, v.s. 2 heroes + bodyguard for Horse.
44:52 Viewer shifts to Eagle vision and we now can see that he has not yet explored the tile where the first tower was built. He has no vision yet on Town center and retreats to defend a Myrkalfar raid.
45:25 Eagle is back at the Horse’s door and sees horse is starting a tower at the frontier tile.
45:40 Eagle attacks the tower tile. Kills a wood cutter. Horse retreats. Then Eagle moves at the “safe” edge of the tile to keep contesting it, but Horse sends his 2 heroes to finish the tower, even under combat, and pushes eagle back without further casualties. I personally think Eagle seriously messed up here, and should have abused his axe throwers range to kill the Horse hero that was already wounded, and likely prevent completion of the tower. WDYT? After this engagement, forces seem to be: Eagle with 2 axe throwers, 3 shield bearers, Grif and bodyguard. Horse with 2 heroes and bodyguard.
46:50 Eagle reaches 200 fame
47:15 Eagle attacks the tower (he still has vision over only 1 tile of horse territory). Both retreat with wounded heroes, but the tile is saved by Horse.
47:40 Eagle attacks Myrkalfar camp in an attempt to heal his hero. He loses the bodyguard in this engagement and almost loses Grif.
48:25 Eagle scouts Horse territory. Satisfaction falls to negative for him.
49:45 Second winter
50:10 Eagle eventually scouts Horse town centre and immediately attacks the same tower again off screen
50:30 Horse comes to defence with 6 warriors, the 2 heroes and the bodyguard. The tower falls but a couple of indecisive moves from Eagle allow Horse to kill Grif and follow up. Eagle keeps fighting in neutral territory but his army gets crushed without Grif. It looks like Eagle falls under pressure and commits several mistakes in a row. We can see from Eagle point of view that he has no more troop, 6 villagers, 2 sailors, 3 farmers and 3 falconers.
51:50 Viewer switches to Horse point of view, and we can see that he just scouted the first tile from Eagle territory.
51:55 Several draugrs attack Eagle tile… luckily for horse they do so right under his vision, so he knows Eagle is in serious troubles.
52:19 Horse sends his troop to Eagle territory while scouting for the town centre. From this point, the game is over, Oslo is barely playing and will gg out of the game, giving Lockness the game and the tournament win worth 10K euros.

*correction - moved in 2020
Lived in MA, BD and I followed a 2017 ordejudgment. 50/50 joint for child’s entire life (M,12) BD moved in 2018 1 hr away in MA. My husband accepted a job in early 2020 in ME. We told BD as soon as the job was accepted about the move. We were congratulated, and there were no voiced opinions about the pending move. March 2020 - Covid happened, my husband became an essential worker. I was laid off from medical job (office closed) and I informed BD, child and I would be going back and fourth between ME and MA while he was in my care until housing was solidified. (Still no objections) Moved into a home in NH (close to ME/husbands employment) June 2020. Child was continuing normal pick up/drop off. Relationship between parental units was copasetic. BD and his wife visited the new home multiple times, they all also have a vacation home in ME. (Still not objections) Oct 2020, BD and I both hired representation to come up with a new agreement that encompassed both of our new moves and a schedule which is in the best interest of our son. We came up with an agreement/ schedule that was signed by both bd, and I. January 2023, son missed a football game (which he was not playing in, only had to suit up for) at his own request to spend more time with his baby brother. He called BD and told him his reasoning. BD was upset with me, and stated he wanted me to force our son to go to his game. I refused to do that. He hasn’t missed a game other than this one on my time since starting to play sports. In the interim, my attorney filed to get the agreement we signed heard in front of a judge. Feb 2023 I received first of 3 threatening letters from his new attorneys stating he disavows the agreement that was signed, refuses to follow the schedule we came up with and have been following for 2 years. He demanded if I am unable to bring our son to games, his father should keep him and at anytime he has a scheduled game, he should have him. In the new agreement BD agreed to give me April vaca. But now that he disavowed it, he wanted April vaca back to follow the 2017 judgment. When I pressed to follow it fully (which means I have our child 3 of 4 weekends) his attorneys denied this and wanted to keep following every other weekend. I filed a temp order to hold BD accountable to a schedule instead of cherry picking from both when he felt it benefited him. He then retaliated with requesting full custody, follicle testing, accused me of being an alcoholic and drug addict with no basis, and also alleging our son has full access to loaded weapons in our home. He also stated he never gave me permission to move, and I never asked the court permission. I have reached out multiple times to figure out a summer schedule because I have no idea what BD is following at this point. He refuses to follow the 2017 judgement and refuses to follow the summer schedule we agreed to in the new agreement he just recently disavowed. Our case has been kicked to the new district BD is in so, it’s a waiting game. Please give me advice on how I should proceed… the uncertainty for my son and I has been heavy. My son has been very emotional about not seeing me or his brother as much as he would like to, and I am at a loss trying to positively explain away certain times he knew we were supposed to see each other. Please be kind ❤️

Hello beautiful mailers! Another thank you because you have given me more amazing mail. Alphabetized thanks:
u/HexagonalRainbow I had just been talking about James Baldwin before this arrived, so it felt like the right kind of synchronicity. He was such a talent! Thank you for this postcard :)
u/lunatenchi Thank you for the milestone congratulations! This is such a sweet cute card, and such a sweet graphic, it could give me cavities :) am sending you a return thank you
u/ninajyang Our most mysterious, glamorous presence on the sub, thank you for sending me mail (of course I can’t send a thank you back lol), wonderful getting a note for my milestone, I appreciate it bunches :) Also dang! that’s very pretty stationery!
u/not_napoleon Thank you for this lovely postcard that you MADE and also great name stamp
u/ok_hope1551 Thank you for the pretty vintage-style camera card!
u/on1oman1ac Thank you for this beautiful postcard! Is that your handwriting?! It’s too perfect to be handwriting, it must be an app? Also where did you get this postcard, it’s so beautiful in person!
u/RitaAlbertson Hoping I spelled your name right b/c the postmark was right on top of it. Your handwriting is beautiful, and I appreciated the way you struck out the “name” of the artwork with the real name so I could see what Temu had written. To be fair to Temu, Glenn Nguyen M. sounds like he could be a fire painter too :)
u/rosiealeo1 Thank you for picking me to help test out your wooden postcard! It looks perfect and it was an exciting different thing to receive in the mail! I love Moomins :)
u/serioussunstealer Thank you for this cool postcard! You’re another person with beautiful handwriting, shouts. And the stickers were very cute! I hope your summer isn’t too hot :)
u/standardissuenotepad Beautifully written letter and shouts to your typewriter. Will reply of course, even if it isn’t as pretty
Thank you everyone, each piece of mail delighted me in a different way even if I don’t have the right words for it. I’ll send postcards back to the people who included return addresses. Good vibes to the ones who didn’t. Thank you everybody :)

The one thing I could probably live without, and I won the grand prize.
I enter a lot of competitions like these. The only other times I had won something was £5 off at a local restaurant, and a raffle at a Christmas fair. I won a life-size chocolate Santa for that raffle. It was actually really nice, high-quality chocolate.
I don't remember entering this paperclip competition, but me and my friends do dumb things when we're drunk sometimes. Entering a stupid competition didn't seem out of the realm of possibilities.
It started when I received a single envelope, full of paperclips. There were easily 100, at least. Probably more. You can imagine my confusion when I opened this first one - No letter inside, only paperclips. Red, green, blue, yellow, pink, black, white... It almost looked like something you'd sprinkle onto a cake as they poured down to my feet, pitter-pattering on the wooden hall floor.
I rolled my eyes and cleaned up. I figured an office had put the wrong address for a supply delivery.
One shipment of 100 paperclips is odd. But 2? That's where I got suspicious.
The second day had me question whether this was some form of prank. I was smarter this time, though - I recognised the weight and feel of the envelope. I recognised the outline of paperclips as I held it up to the light. I didn't let them spill out at my feet - Although, my curiosity still had me open it to peek inside. You'd do the same. "Is it really just paperclips?" Yes. Yes it is.
By the fifth day, I had stopped opening it. I'd just briefly hold it up to the light to confirm the outline looked like paperclips, and then I'd toss it.
I don't remember why I checked my spam folder in my emails, but when I took a look, I immediately saw it. The cheesy headline stood out. "Clip-pity Clop, You've Won the Lifetime Paperclip Jack-pot! 🎉📎"
Below is the rest of the email.

Your luck has just CLIPPED right into place! Congratulations! You are the GRAND WINNER of our "Lifetime supply of paperclips" competition! 🥳📎
From now on, you can proudly say goodbye to those chaotic loose papers and let our high-quality paperclips take over. No more sacrificing yourself to papercuts! And guess what? You didn't just win a box, you won an ENTIRE LIFETIME of daily paperclip surprises! You've really hit the jack-CLIP! 🎁
Starting from next week, you will receive a random amount of our finest, top-notch paperclips every single day. Just imagine the POSSIBILITIES! Office organization, arts and crafts, creative paperclip sculptures... the list is never-ending!
With your new paperclip friends by your side, there's no end to the horizon of tidiness and creativity (to the MAX)! Just like our paperclips: durable, strong, and clip-tacular! 💪📎
As we ship your first batch, let's get you started by sharing some mind-blowing paperclip fun-facts...

I'll save you the fun-facts section, as it's not very "fun". Although I did learn that they've been around since the 1800s.
The only interesting thing that this email gave me was a company name - Clipogenics. I promptly sent an email back asking that my prize be transferred to someone else. My exact words were "someone more in need of paperclips," although thinking about it, I'm not sure who that could possibly apply to.
Spoiler alert: They did not reply, and the envelopes kept on coming.
2 weeks went by; I was still receiving paperclips.
6 weeks went by; nothing changed.
A few weeks ago was the 3-month mark. Over 90 days of paperclips. Yes, I had considered selling them, but I really don't know how much money I could make. Also, yes, they even arrived on Sundays. I could not understand who was delivering these. I never caught them, although I assumed the person posting them had no association with the company themselves, so talking to them is never something I attempted.
Around that 3-month mark, I was going through my normal daily routine. Make a cup of coffee, pick up the envelope from the hallway floor, hold it up against a light, and toss it in the bin. Only this time, the light revealed the outline of 1 single paperclip, and something else. I have to admit, deep down, part of me was almost excited. A real-life plot twist? Something to spice up an otherwise mundane part of my day? Curveballs are usually exciting to me, and this was no exception. I reached inside, pulling the mystery object out. What could they possibly have sent me?
A severed finger.
A dry, almost slightly green, severed finger.
I'm not sure which happened first - My scream, or dropping the finger to the floor.
I noticed only then that the paperclip was lodged under the fingernail, piercing right through the flesh. It was golden this time - A colour I had not been sent before. I'd like to say I stayed calm, but I didn't - I ran to the bathroom to throw up.
I contacted the police, and they took the finger and envelope away. I explained everything that I knew, and showed them the email - They told me that they'd investigate.
"It's crazy, isn't it?" - One of the police officers began his thought to me.
"What?"
"How dangerous simple production can be. Some poor sod has lost a finger over something as simple as a paperclip!"
"You think it was an accident?" - I don't know what exactly I thought it was. A threat, maybe? I'm still not sure.
"Of course. Probably someone on the production line packaging these things. Finger gets caught in machinery, 'Ahh, no, whoops!', and before you know it the finger's lost. The weight of the finger makes the machine think the envelope is now full of paperclips, and off it goes to your door."
Somehow a calm explanation of this situation actually helped me. Hell, it almost convinced me that it was just normal. I was assured, though, that the company was at fault for health & safety, and that something would be done about this.
A couple of weeks went by, and the police hadn't contacted me with any new information. The envelopes kept coming daily, but I was too afraid to open them. For fear of tossing away evidence, though, I kept them piled up in the corner.
As the pile grew taller, I decided to bite the bullet and open them, but not before carefully inspecting each one.
My hands shaking, I held the first up to the light, and it was just full of paperclips. Perhaps the incident really was a one-off, and the fault had been fixed. I held a few more up, and my heart almost skipped a beat when I found one with a solid shadow. No outline of paperclips - This envelope had a letter.
I carefully opened it up, and read.

Dear valued customer,
We would like to formally apologize for the incident that occurred recently. We understand that the events were likely traumatic, and whilst we may never make it right, we'd like to offer you a one-time compensation.
Attached to this letter, using one of our sturdy, high-end paperclips, we have written a cheque for £2,000. We hope we can continue our partnership professionally.
We understand that you may want to cancel your lifetime supply of paperclips.
Unfortunately, we must decline this request.
We hope you understand,
Clipogenics Customer Service Team

No. I did not understand. Do you? Do you understand what the fuck they're talking about?
I contacted the police to update them, letting them know that I had received this message. They sent somebody to collect it.
The following day, assuming all was well, I picked up the daily delivery from the floor. Before I had a chance to check it, there was a knock at the door - I folded the envelope and put it in my back pocket. I opened the door, and was surprised to see a man in a suit looking very concerned.
He wasted no time in getting to the point.
"Hello, we're relocating you. Pack your things, and tell nobody. We have a temporary hotel booked for you."
My lack of response showed that I had many questions.
"Look - It's just precautionary. We can't find any evidence of Clipogenics ever existing, and..."
"...and what?"
"...and the finger matched the D.N.A of a recent assumed suicide. It's now assumed to be murder."
I had a feeling there was more. Unfortunately, his next sentence confirmed that.
"The person in question was found to have also won the competition."
I did not need telling twice - I got my essentials packed, and was at the hotel in less than 90 minutes. It was only in the next town over, which I found odd, yet comforted that I was still so close to home.
After the man left and I was left with my own thoughts, I was surprised at how quiet my head was. I was just...content. I wasn't happy or sad or scared, I was just existing. Perhaps I was still in shock. It took about an hour before I remembered the envelope in my back pocket. I held it up to the light, and knew from the resulting darkness that this contained another letter.
I hesitantly opened it, peeking inside to check for hidden surprises.
Upon taking it out, I thought it to be a blank piece of paper - It seemed entirely empty. Until I unfolded it, to reveal the few words printed upon this letter.

Dear valued customer,
Suicides don't lose fingers,
The police do not wear suits.

The world spun. The world crumbled. The world felt like it no longer existed.
Then all at once, reality came back to me, as I felt a rush of anxiety-driven energy. I paced back and forth in the limited space I had, weighing up my options and trying to come up with a plan.
Could I leave? I was probably being watched.
Could I contact the police? I certainly no longer felt comfortable doing so.
Could I talk to my friends or family? The last thing I wanted was to put them in danger.
I knew I had to do one of these 3 options, and opted for the first. It was still bright out - Surely I'd be safe in crowds. So that's exactly what I did. I stuck to busy areas, and travelled across the country, using as many different types of public transportation as I could.
I didn't stop until night fell. I booked a new hotel under a fake name, and paid in cash. I rested surprisingly well that night.
My sleep was interrupted at around 7am to knocking at the door. "No thank you," I sleepily yelled at what I assumed to be room service.
"Something arrived in reception for you - I'll slide it under the door."
A white envelope emerged through the crack under the door.
I wanted to stay away from it, but I knew that being unaware of the contents would scare me more than anything else. Feeling my heart pounding through my chest, I reached for the envelope, noticing a thick object within. Another finger?
No, a letter, this time with a vial of liquid, and two golden paperclips.

Dear valued customer,
We're glad you're settling in well to your new surroundings.
Sorry for the little show - We needed to assure that you'd get as far away from your hometown as possible.
Your true prize isn't the paperclips. That would be mundane.
Your true prize is immortality.
Paperclips are beautiful, aren't they? Connecting paper to paper, as the universe connects life to life. And as the flow of life continues, it has connected us to you.
The chain of our will continues, as the chain of paperclips continues with it.
The vial within has a unique purpose. It will kill you and help you live, all at the same time.
You do understand, don't you?
Drink the vial, and stab a paperclip into yourself.
You will slowly drift away for a moment, but you will stay connected to the universe. You must.
You will awaken in your new body - One of the many that we have cryogenically frozen here.
It worked for me.
You saw my finger.
Every single paperclip we have sent you has had a purpose. Each has been blessed with a new connection for your new life. They have all been through your home, many have touched your skin, and all have been held up to the light.
Their blessings will reach you in your new life.
The green ones bring you wealth. The red ones bring you health. The blue ones bring you happiness.
All you have to do is drink the vial.
Before the poison sets in, choose a paperclip. Your decision will always be the right one.
We know how your brain ticks. Every word we've ever written, and every colour we've ever chosen, have all been designed to sway your decision in this very moment.
You'll fall asleep as a valued customer,
But you'll awaken as our valued employee.

I am not letting them control my destiny. I will not sacrifice my life to their company, to become one of their puppets to control.
I know this company has a far greater reach than I first understood, so I might not be able to tell anybody. But I can tell everybody.
I hope this post reaches their next "big winner" - And I hope they are as strong-willed as I am.

The one thing I could probably live without, and I won the grand prize.
I enter a lot of competitions like these. The only other times I had won something was £5 off at a local restaurant, and a raffle at a Christmas fair. I won a life-size chocolate Santa for that raffle. It was actually really nice, high-quality chocolate.
I don't remember entering this paperclip competition, but me and my friends do dumb things when we're drunk sometimes. Entering a stupid competition didn't seem out of the realm of possibilities.
It started when I received a single envelope, full of paperclips. There were easily 100, at least. Probably more. You can imagine my confusion when I opened this first one - No letter inside, only paperclips. Red, green, blue, yellow, pink, black, white... It almost looked like something you'd sprinkle onto a cake as they poured down to my feet, pitter-pattering on the wooden hall floor.
I rolled my eyes and cleaned up. I figured an office had put the wrong address for a supply delivery.
One shipment of 100 paperclips is odd. But 2? That's where I got suspicious.
The second day had me question whether this was some form of prank. I was smarter this time, though - I recognised the weight and feel of the envelope. I recognised the outline of paperclips as I held it up to the light. I didn't let them spill out at my feet - Although, my curiosity still had me open it to peek inside. You'd do the same. "Is it really just paperclips?" Yes. Yes it is.
By the fifth day, I had stopped opening it. I'd just briefly hold it up to the light to confirm the outline looked like paperclips, and then I'd toss it.
I don't remember why I checked my spam folder in my emails, but when I took a look, I immediately saw it. The cheesy headline stood out. "Clip-pity Clop, You've Won the Lifetime Paperclip Jack-pot! 🎉📎"
Below is the rest of the email.

Your luck has just CLIPPED right into place! Congratulations! You are the GRAND WINNER of our "Lifetime supply of paperclips" competition! 🥳📎
From now on, you can proudly say goodbye to those chaotic loose papers and let our high-quality paperclips take over. No more sacrificing yourself to papercuts! And guess what? You didn't just win a box, you won an ENTIRE LIFETIME of daily paperclip surprises! You've really hit the jack-CLIP! 🎁
Starting from next week, you will receive a random amount of our finest, top-notch paperclips every single day. Just imagine the POSSIBILITIES! Office organization, arts and crafts, creative paperclip sculptures... the list is never-ending!
With your new paperclip friends by your side, there's no end to the horizon of tidiness and creativity (to the MAX)! Just like our paperclips: durable, strong, and clip-tacular! 💪📎
As we ship your first batch, let's get you started by sharing some mind-blowing paperclip fun-facts...

I'll save you the fun-facts section, as it's not very "fun". Although I did learn that they've been around since the 1800s.
The only interesting thing that this email gave me was a company name - Clipogenics. I promptly sent an email back asking that my prize be transferred to someone else. My exact words were "someone more in need of paperclips," although thinking about it, I'm not sure who that could possibly apply to.
Spoiler alert: They did not reply, and the envelopes kept on coming.
2 weeks went by; I was still receiving paperclips.
6 weeks went by; nothing changed.
A few weeks ago was the 3-month mark. Over 90 days of paperclips. Yes, I had considered selling them, but I really don't know how much money I could make. Also, yes, they even arrived on Sundays. I could not understand who was delivering these. I never caught them, although I assumed the person posting them had no association with the company themselves, so talking to them is never something I attempted.
Around that 3-month mark, I was going through my normal daily routine. Make a cup of coffee, pick up the envelope from the hallway floor, hold it up against a light, and toss it in the bin. Only this time, the light revealed the outline of 1 single paperclip, and something else. I have to admit, deep down, part of me was almost excited. A real-life plot twist? Something to spice up an otherwise mundane part of my day? Curveballs are usually exciting to me, and this was no exception. I reached inside, pulling the mystery object out. What could they possibly have sent me?
A severed finger.
A dry, almost slightly green, severed finger.
I'm not sure which happened first - My scream, or dropping the finger to the floor.
I noticed only then that the paperclip was lodged under the fingernail, piercing right through the flesh. It was golden this time - A colour I had not been sent before. I'd like to say I stayed calm, but I didn't - I ran to the bathroom to throw up.
I contacted the police, and they took the finger and envelope away. I explained everything that I knew, and showed them the email - They told me that they'd investigate.
"It's crazy, isn't it?" - One of the police officers began his thought to me.
"What?"
"How dangerous simple production can be. Some poor sod has lost a finger over something as simple as a paperclip!"
"You think it was an accident?" - I don't know what exactly I thought it was. A threat, maybe? I'm still not sure.
"Of course. Probably someone on the production line packaging these things. Finger gets caught in machinery, 'Ahh, no, whoops!', and before you know it the finger's lost. The weight of the finger makes the machine think the envelope is now full of paperclips, and off it goes to your door."
Somehow a calm explanation of this situation actually helped me. Hell, it almost convinced me that it was just normal. I was assured, though, that the company was at fault for health & safety, and that something would be done about this.
A couple of weeks went by, and the police hadn't contacted me with any new information. The envelopes kept coming daily, but I was too afraid to open them. For fear of tossing away evidence, though, I kept them piled up in the corner.
As the pile grew taller, I decided to bite the bullet and open them, but not before carefully inspecting each one.
My hands shaking, I held the first up to the light, and it was just full of paperclips. Perhaps the incident really was a one-off, and the fault had been fixed. I held a few more up, and my heart almost skipped a beat when I found one with a solid shadow. No outline of paperclips - This envelope had a letter.
I carefully opened it up, and read.

Dear valued customer,
We would like to formally apologize for the incident that occurred recently. We understand that the events were likely traumatic, and whilst we may never make it right, we'd like to offer you a one-time compensation.
Attached to this letter, using one of our sturdy, high-end paperclips, we have written a cheque for £2,000. We hope we can continue our partnership professionally.
We understand that you may want to cancel your lifetime supply of paperclips.
Unfortunately, we must decline this request.
We hope you understand,
Clipogenics Customer Service Team

No. I did not understand. Do you? Do you understand what the fuck they're talking about?
I contacted the police to update them, letting them know that I had received this message. They sent somebody to collect it.
The following day, assuming all was well, I picked up the daily delivery from the floor. Before I had a chance to check it, there was a knock at the door - I folded the envelope and put it in my back pocket. I opened the door, and was surprised to see a man in a suit looking very concerned.
He wasted no time in getting to the point.
"Hello, we're relocating you. Pack your things, and tell nobody. We have a temporary hotel booked for you."
My lack of response showed that I had many questions.
"Look - It's just precautionary. We can't find any evidence of Clipogenics ever existing, and..."
"...and what?"
"...and the finger matched the D.N.A of a recent assumed suicide. It's now assumed to be murder."
I had a feeling there was more. Unfortunately, his next sentence confirmed that.
"The person in question was found to have also won the competition."
I did not need telling twice - I got my essentials packed, and was at the hotel in less than 90 minutes. It was only in the next town over, which I found odd, yet comforted that I was still so close to home.
After the man left and I was left with my own thoughts, I was surprised at how quiet my head was. I was just...content. I wasn't happy or sad or scared, I was just existing. Perhaps I was still in shock. It took about an hour before I remembered the envelope in my back pocket. I held it up to the light, and knew from the resulting darkness that this contained another letter.
I hesitantly opened it, peeking inside to check for hidden surprises.
Upon taking it out, I thought it to be a blank piece of paper - It seemed entirely empty. Until I unfolded it, to reveal the few words printed upon this letter.

Dear valued customer,
Suicides don't lose fingers,
The police do not wear suits.

The world spun. The world crumbled. The world felt like it no longer existed.
Then all at once, reality came back to me, as I felt a rush of anxiety-driven energy. I paced back and forth in the limited space I had, weighing up my options and trying to come up with a plan.
Could I leave? I was probably being watched.
Could I contact the police? I certainly no longer felt comfortable doing so.
Could I talk to my friends or family? The last thing I wanted was to put them in danger.
I knew I had to do one of these 3 options, and opted for the first. It was still bright out - Surely I'd be safe in crowds. So that's exactly what I did. I stuck to busy areas, and travelled across the country, using as many different types of public transportation as I could.
I didn't stop until night fell. I booked a new hotel under a fake name, and paid in cash. I rested surprisingly well that night.
My sleep was interrupted at around 7am to knocking at the door. "No thank you," I sleepily yelled at what I assumed to be room service.
"Something arrived in reception for you - I'll slide it under the door."
A white envelope emerged through the crack under the door.
I wanted to stay away from it, but I knew that being unaware of the contents would scare me more than anything else. Feeling my heart pounding through my chest, I reached for the envelope, noticing a thick object within. Another finger?
No, a letter, this time with a vial of liquid, and two golden paperclips.

Dear valued customer,
We're glad you're settling in well to your new surroundings.
Sorry for the little show - We needed to assure that you'd get as far away from your hometown as possible.
Your true prize isn't the paperclips. That would be mundane.
Your true prize is immortality.
Paperclips are beautiful, aren't they? Connecting paper to paper, as the universe connects life to life. And as the flow of life continues, it has connected us to you.
The chain of our will continues, as the chain of paperclips continues with it.
The vial within has a unique purpose. It will kill you and help you live, all at the same time.
You do understand, don't you?
Drink the vial, and stab a paperclip into yourself.
You will slowly drift away for a moment, but you will stay connected to the universe. You must.
You will awaken in your new body - One of the many that we have cryogenically frozen here.
It worked for me.
You saw my finger.
Every single paperclip we have sent you has had a purpose. Each has been blessed with a new connection for your new life. They have all been through your home, many have touched your skin, and all have been held up to the light.
Their blessings will reach you in your new life.
The green ones bring you wealth. The red ones bring you health. The blue ones bring you happiness.
All you have to do is drink the vial.
Before the poison sets in, choose a paperclip. Your decision will always be the right one.
We know how your brain ticks. Every word we've ever written, and every colour we've ever chosen, have all been designed to sway your decision in this very moment.
You'll fall asleep as a valued customer,
But you'll awaken as our valued employee.

I am not letting them control my destiny. I will not sacrifice my life to their company, to become one of their puppets to control.
I know this company has a far greater reach than I first understood, so I might not be able to tell anybody. But I can tell everybody.
I hope this post reaches their next "big winner" - And I hope they are as strong-willed as I am.
===

The one thing I could probably live without, and I won the grand prize.
I enter a lot of competitions like these. The only other times I had won something was £5 off at a local restaurant, and a raffle at a Christmas fair. I won a life-size chocolate Santa for that raffle. It was actually really nice, high-quality chocolate.
I don't remember entering this paperclip competition, but me and my friends do dumb things when we're drunk sometimes. Entering a stupid competition didn't seem out of the realm of possibilities.
It started when I received a single envelope, full of paperclips. There were easily 100, at least. Probably more. You can imagine my confusion when I opened this first one - No letter inside, only paperclips. Red, green, blue, yellow, pink, black, white... It almost looked like something you'd sprinkle onto a cake as they poured down to my feet, pitter-pattering on the wooden hall floor.
I rolled my eyes and cleaned up. I figured an office had put the wrong address for a supply delivery.
One shipment of 100 paperclips is odd. But 2? That's where I got suspicious.
The second day had me question whether this was some form of prank. I was smarter this time, though - I recognised the weight and feel of the envelope. I recognised the outline of paperclips as I held it up to the light. I didn't let them spill out at my feet - Although, my curiosity still had me open it to peek inside. You'd do the same. "Is it really just paperclips?" Yes. Yes it is.
By the fifth day, I had stopped opening it. I'd just briefly hold it up to the light to confirm the outline looked like paperclips, and then I'd toss it.
I don't remember why I checked my spam folder in my emails, but when I took a look, I immediately saw it. The cheesy headline stood out. "Clip-pity Clop, You've Won the Lifetime Paperclip Jack-pot! 🎉📎"
Below is the rest of the email.

Your luck has just CLIPPED right into place! Congratulations! You are the GRAND WINNER of our "Lifetime supply of paperclips" competition! 🥳📎
From now on, you can proudly say goodbye to those chaotic loose papers and let our high-quality paperclips take over. No more sacrificing yourself to papercuts! And guess what? You didn't just win a box, you won an ENTIRE LIFETIME of daily paperclip surprises! You've really hit the jack-CLIP! 🎁
Starting from next week, you will receive a random amount of our finest, top-notch paperclips every single day. Just imagine the POSSIBILITIES! Office organization, arts and crafts, creative paperclip sculptures... the list is never-ending!
With your new paperclip friends by your side, there's no end to the horizon of tidiness and creativity (to the MAX)! Just like our paperclips: durable, strong, and clip-tacular! 💪📎
As we ship your first batch, let's get you started by sharing some mind-blowing paperclip fun-facts...

I'll save you the fun-facts section, as it's not very "fun". Although I did learn that they've been around since the 1800s.
The only interesting thing that this email gave me was a company name - Clipogenics. I promptly sent an email back asking that my prize be transferred to someone else. My exact words were "someone more in need of paperclips," although thinking about it, I'm not sure who that could possibly apply to.
Spoiler alert: They did not reply, and the envelopes kept on coming.
2 weeks went by; I was still receiving paperclips.
6 weeks went by; nothing changed.
A few weeks ago was the 3-month mark. Over 90 days of paperclips. Yes, I had considered selling them, but I really don't know how much money I could make. Also, yes, they even arrived on Sundays. I could not understand who was delivering these. I never caught them, although I assumed the person posting them had no association with the company themselves, so talking to them is never something I attempted.
Around that 3-month mark, I was going through my normal daily routine. Make a cup of coffee, pick up the envelope from the hallway floor, hold it up against a light, and toss it in the bin. Only this time, the light revealed the outline of 1 single paperclip, and something else. I have to admit, deep down, part of me was almost excited. A real-life plot twist? Something to spice up an otherwise mundane part of my day? Curveballs are usually exciting to me, and this was no exception. I reached inside, pulling the mystery object out. What could they possibly have sent me?
A severed finger.
A dry, almost slightly green, severed finger.
I'm not sure which happened first - My scream, or dropping the finger to the floor.
I noticed only then that the paperclip was lodged under the fingernail, piercing right through the flesh. It was golden this time - A colour I had not been sent before. I'd like to say I stayed calm, but I didn't - I ran to the bathroom to throw up.
I contacted the police, and they took the finger and envelope away. I explained everything that I knew, and showed them the email - They told me that they'd investigate.
"It's crazy, isn't it?" - One of the police officers began his thought to me.
"What?"
"How dangerous simple production can be. Some poor sod has lost a finger over something as simple as a paperclip!"
"You think it was an accident?" - I don't know what exactly I thought it was. A threat, maybe? I'm still not sure.
"Of course. Probably someone on the production line packaging these things. Finger gets caught in machinery, 'Ahh, no, whoops!', and before you know it the finger's lost. The weight of the finger makes the machine think the envelope is now full of paperclips, and off it goes to your door."
Somehow a calm explanation of this situation actually helped me. Hell, it almost convinced me that it was just normal. I was assured, though, that the company was at fault for health & safety, and that something would be done about this.
A couple of weeks went by, and the police hadn't contacted me with any new information. The envelopes kept coming daily, but I was too afraid to open them. For fear of tossing away evidence, though, I kept them piled up in the corner.
As the pile grew taller, I decided to bite the bullet and open them, but not before carefully inspecting each one.
My hands shaking, I held the first up to the light, and it was just full of paperclips. Perhaps the incident really was a one-off, and the fault had been fixed. I held a few more up, and my heart almost skipped a beat when I found one with a solid shadow. No outline of paperclips - This envelope had a letter.
I carefully opened it up, and read.

Dear valued customer,
We would like to formally apologize for the incident that occurred recently. We understand that the events were likely traumatic, and whilst we may never make it right, we'd like to offer you a one-time compensation.
Attached to this letter, using one of our sturdy, high-end paperclips, we have written a cheque for £2,000. We hope we can continue our partnership professionally.
We understand that you may want to cancel your lifetime supply of paperclips.
Unfortunately, we must decline this request.
We hope you understand,
Clipogenics Customer Service Team

No. I did not understand. Do you? Do you understand what the fuck they're talking about?
I contacted the police to update them, letting them know that I had received this message. They sent somebody to collect it.
The following day, assuming all was well, I picked up the daily delivery from the floor. Before I had a chance to check it, there was a knock at the door - I folded the envelope and put it in my back pocket. I opened the door, and was surprised to see a man in a suit looking very concerned.
He wasted no time in getting to the point.
"Hello, we're relocating you. Pack your things, and tell nobody. We have a temporary hotel booked for you."
My lack of response showed that I had many questions.
"Look - It's just precautionary. We can't find any evidence of Clipogenics ever existing, and..."
"...and what?"
"...and the finger matched the D.N.A of a recent assumed suicide. It's now assumed to be murder."
I had a feeling there was more. Unfortunately, his next sentence confirmed that.
"The person in question was found to have also won the competition."
I did not need telling twice - I got my essentials packed, and was at the hotel in less than 90 minutes. It was only in the next town over, which I found odd, yet comforted that I was still so close to home.
After the man left and I was left with my own thoughts, I was surprised at how quiet my head was. I was just...content. I wasn't happy or sad or scared, I was just existing. Perhaps I was still in shock. It took about an hour before I remembered the envelope in my back pocket. I held it up to the light, and knew from the resulting darkness that this contained another letter.
I hesitantly opened it, peeking inside to check for hidden surprises.
Upon taking it out, I thought it to be a blank piece of paper - It seemed entirely empty. Until I unfolded it, to reveal the few words printed upon this letter.

Dear valued customer,
Suicides don't lose fingers,
The police do not wear suits.

The world spun. The world crumbled. The world felt like it no longer existed.
Then all at once, reality came back to me, as I felt a rush of anxiety-driven energy. I paced back and forth in the limited space I had, weighing up my options and trying to come up with a plan.
Could I leave? I was probably being watched.
Could I contact the police? I certainly no longer felt comfortable doing so.
Could I talk to my friends or family? The last thing I wanted was to put them in danger.
I knew I had to do one of these 3 options, and opted for the first. It was still bright out - Surely I'd be safe in crowds. So that's exactly what I did. I stuck to busy areas, and travelled across the country, using as many different types of public transportation as I could.
I didn't stop until night fell. I booked a new hotel under a fake name, and paid in cash. I rested surprisingly well that night.
My sleep was interrupted at around 7am to knocking at the door. "No thank you," I sleepily yelled at what I assumed to be room service.
"Something arrived in reception for you - I'll slide it under the door."
A white envelope emerged through the crack under the door.
I wanted to stay away from it, but I knew that being unaware of the contents would scare me more than anything else. Feeling my heart pounding through my chest, I reached for the envelope, noticing a thick object within. Another finger?
No, a letter, this time with a vial of liquid, and two golden paperclips.

Dear valued customer,
We're glad you're settling in well to your new surroundings.
Sorry for the little show - We needed to assure that you'd get as far away from your hometown as possible.
Your true prize isn't the paperclips. That would be mundane.
Your true prize is immortality.
Paperclips are beautiful, aren't they? Connecting paper to paper, as the universe connects life to life. And as the flow of life continues, it has connected us to you.
The chain of our will continues, as the chain of paperclips continues with it.
The vial within has a unique purpose. It will kill you and help you live, all at the same time.
You do understand, don't you?
Drink the vial, and stab a paperclip into yourself.
You will slowly drift away for a moment, but you will stay connected to the universe. You must.
You will awaken in your new body - One of the many that we have cryogenically frozen here.
It worked for me.
You saw my finger.
Every single paperclip we have sent you has had a purpose. Each has been blessed with a new connection for your new life. They have all been through your home, many have touched your skin, and all have been held up to the light.
Their blessings will reach you in your new life.
The green ones bring you wealth. The red ones bring you health. The blue ones bring you happiness.
All you have to do is drink the vial.
Before the poison sets in, choose a paperclip. Your decision will always be the right one.
We know how your brain ticks. Every word we've ever written, and every colour we've ever chosen, have all been designed to sway your decision in this very moment.
You'll fall asleep as a valued customer,
But you'll awaken as our valued employee.

I am not letting them control my destiny. I will not sacrifice my life to their company, to become one of their puppets to control.
I know this company has a far greater reach than I first understood, so I might not be able to tell anybody. But I can tell everybody.
I hope this post reaches their next "big winner" - And I hope they are as strong-willed as I am.
===

Tuesday, May 23 - Monday, May 29

Highlights

score	comments	title & link
2,125	170 comments	(Highlight) Ed Reed 103-yard pick six vs. Cleveland (2004)
1,961	208 comments	[Highlight] Today marks 105 days until the 2023 NFL Season Starts! Let’s remember this 105 yard kickoff return for a TD by Keisean Nixon against the Vikings last season. Packers win, 41-17.
1,809	143 comments	[Highlight] Kyle Juszczyk drags toes along the sideline for a big gain
1,666	117 comments	(Highlight) Donald Penn gets into it with Jared Allen, gives up sack to him on the next play.
1,276	91 comments	[Highlight] Today marks 103 days until the 2023 NFL Season Starts! Let’s remember when Cordarrelle Patterson broke the record for most NFL kickoff return TDs in a career on this 103 yard kickoff return for a TD against the Bears last year. Falcons win, 27-24
1,245	72 comments	[Highlight] Vikings FB C.J. Ham makes a diving catch on 3rd down, which turns into the longest play of his career
911	26 comments	[Highlight] Today marks 102 days until the 2023 NFL Season Starts! Let’s remember this 102 yard kickoff return for a TD by Jamal Agnew against the Broncos in 2021. Broncos would win though, 23-13.
898	43 comments	[Highlight] Today marks 101 days until the 2023 NFL Season Starts! Let’s remember when a 33 year old Andre Roberts ran back a 101 yard kickoff return for a TD against the Broncos back in 2021. Chargers win, 34-13
748	70 comments	[Highlight] Today marks 104 days until the 2023 NFL Season Starts! Let’s remember when Cordarrelle Patterson tied the record for most NFL kickoff returns for a TD in a career on this 104 yard kickoff return for a TD against the Vikings back in 2020. Vikings would win, 19-13.
709	80 comments	[Highlight] Treylon Burks makes a game-ending deep catch over Jaire Alexander before taunting his height
685	397 comments	[Highlight] Dallas penalized for pass interference; refs pick up flag (2014 playoffs)
649	60 comments	[Highlight] Today marks 106 days until the 2023 NFL Season Starts! Let’s remember this 106 yard kickoff return for a TD by Alvin Kamara against the Buccaneers back in 2017. Buccaneers win, 31-24.
510	44 comments	[Highlight] Today marks 107 Days until the 2023 NFL Season Starts! Let’s remember Josh Huff’s 107 yard kickoff return for a TD against the Titans back in 2014. This was his first career NFL TD and the longest in Eagles franchise history. Eagles win, 43-24

score	comments	title & link
956	219 comments	[OC] How Matt Patricia burned the Patriots Offense to the ground. \| Film breakdown of how Patricia struggled to design plays that worked
647	51 comments	[OC] The Tampa-2 is a lie.

OC

score	comments	title & link
647	113 comments	[OC] A Comprehensive Guide to Pro Football Video Game Covers

Top comments

score	comment
5,014	jimmyhoffasbrother said It helps to have endorsements from every brand on the planet too.
4,963	JoeyRobot said Can you imagine if he and AB had just kept their shit together for a couple more seasons.
4,381	Rapey_Keebler_Elves said Might as well eliminate the kickoff at this point. The NFL won't though, because it's an opportunity for extra commercial breaks.
3,650	ThatInception said This is as blatant as you can be without actually saying the words “We’re tanking”
3,485	emmasdad01 said Eased? Unceremoniously tossed in the trash.
3,439	Jd20001 said Calling him a free agent and not a former player is very generous
3,347	OrangeForeign said Known successful team the Detroit Lions
3,326	kellybobellyhtown said While having to stay home during Covid, my little nephew decided to write 30-40 NFL players to see if anyone would write him back. One did. Jimmy Garoppolo. He sent some signed stuff, wrote a letter, ...
3,290	Chaz_Maracaz said College fans, does this mean you can fair catch on a kick off, at the 2 yard line, and it comes out to the 25?
3,171	Misdirected_Colors said Idk why a player would ever have a non certified agent. It's such a sleazy business and the league is like "here's a list of guys we know won't fuck you over" and players are like "nah I'd rather use...

Awarded Posts

score/comments	awards	title & link
429 - 80 comments	1 All-Seeing Upvote, 1 Gold	[OC] 14 quarterbacks have had 20% of their total yards come from running the ball in a single season. This Bears QB holds the record with 47%. Here's a graph of all 14 QBs and the 22 seasons where they were at 20%+
793 - 1,217 comments	1 Gold	What is your most "my team is cursed" moment that you remember?
5,001 - 730 comments	1 To The Stars	[Steel Here podcast] Former Steelers RB Le'Veon Bell finally admits he made a mistake: "It was like a little petty, the guarantee stuff. I’m thinking could I have just ate it, yeah, I probably could’ve, yeah, I probably could’ve really ate it."
1,072 - 813 comments	1 Gold	[Offseason Post] Who would you say is the “Tim Duncan” of the NFL?

Awarded Comments

awards	score	comment
1 Gold, 1 Take My Energy	1	NFL_Warning said The amount of incels in here is too damn high.
1 NFL SB Ring	1,624	Frigglefragglewaggit said The correct answer here is probably Ed Reed.
1 Take My Energy	42	pyreal_ said It was reported that he came back, people just don't care about that. It's the same reason retractions and corrections mean fuck all. People read the first one and run with it. We're all getting...
1 Silver	2,113	pyreal_ said Thankfully, this should make way for an easy path toward getting the correct name in place for the team.. The Washington Department of Football
1 Gold	-25	mjdntn01 said I never had a problem with Redskins.

So some background: I was SPL of my troop for 1.5 years, and I am an Eagle Scout and do literally half the administrative work for the troop as ASPL right now.
I recently turned 16 and asked to be JASM, and my SM said this: “You’re qualified but you’re not 17” so I explain to him that the BSA requirement is 16 and he says he is aware of this.
I know there is some flexibility with the JASM requirements but considering the troop committee, PLC, and Committee Chair agree to make me a JASM- I feel he is being a bit ridiculous.
Assume that all other requirements of the SMS are met (which they are) -Plan a big event (I planned our troops Centennial) -Former SPL (I said 1.5 years) -Eagle Scout + 6 months (I am a silver palm eagle…)
The only reason he could deny me is because his son had said some not scout like things and I confronted him about it…
So, even just for future reference is he allowed to deny JASM because someone is not 17?

I never believed in the paranormal or the supernatural. I always thought that those things were just made up to scare children and to sell horror movies. But that was before I received that text message.
It was a simple text message, but it sent shivers down my spine. It was from an unknown number, and it contained only two words: "Truth or Dare?" I didn't know what to make of it, so I ignored it and went back to sleep.
The next night, at exactly 2am, my phone beeped again. It was the same text message: "Truth or Dare?" This time, I couldn't ignore it. I replied, "Who is this?" But I didn't get a response.
The following night, and every night after that, my phone would buzz at 2am, and the same question would appear: "Truth or Dare?" I tried blocking the number, but it didn't work. I even changed my phone number, but it didn't stop the messages.
One night, I decided to play along. I replied, "Truth." Almost immediately, a new message appeared: "Have you ever killed someone?" I was shocked. Of course, I hadn't killed anyone. I replied with a simple "No," but the messages kept coming.
The questions became more and more personal, and the dares became more and more dangerous. They would ask me to do things like go to a graveyard at night or break into a stranger's house. I tried to ignore the messages, but they kept coming every night, like clockwork.
I couldn't take it anymore. I was losing sleep, and I was constantly on edge. I decided to tell my friend about it, but she didn't believe me. She thought I was making it up for attention. I even showed her the messages, but she brushed them off as a prank.
One night, I decided to take a dare. The message instructed me to go to a park at midnight and wait for further instructions. I hesitated, but the curiosity got the best of me. I drove to the park and waited.
At exactly midnight, a car pulled up beside me. The driver rolled down the window and said, "Get in." I hesitated again, but something inside me told me to go for it. I got into the car, and the driver handed me an envelope. "Open it when you get home," he said, and then he drove off.
I opened the envelope when I got home, and inside was a note that said, "You have been chosen to play a game with us. If you refuse, we will make your life a living hell. If you win, you will receive a prize beyond your wildest dreams."
The note instructed me to return to the park the next night at midnight. When I got there, there were five other people waiting for me. They all looked scared and nervous, just like me. We were all given envelopes with instructions, and we were told to follow them to the letter.
The game was called "Truth or Dare: The Ultimate Challenge." The rules were simple: each player would take turns choosing truth or dare, and the rest of the group would come up with a challenge or a question. If the player refused to do the challenge or answer the question, they would be eliminated from the game.
The challenges and questions were brutal. We had to do things like eat live insects, jump off a bridge, and reveal our darkest secrets. It was like nothing I had ever experienced before.
As the game went on, the challenges became more and more dangerous. One of the players was dared to drive blindfolded on the highway, and another was dared to rob a bank. I was starting to regret my decision to play.
But then, something strange happened. The game seemed to take on a life of its own. The challenges and questions became more personal, and they seemed to be tailored specifically to each player. It was like the game knew our deepest fears and desires.
I started to suspect that the game was not being controlled by the other players. It was like there was a higher power at work, pulling the strings and manipulating us.
As the game went on, the players started to disappear one by one. Some were eliminated by the challenges, while others simply vanished without a trace. I was the last one standing.
The final challenge was the most terrifying of all. I was dared to enter a dark, abandoned building and retrieve an object from a room on the second floor. I didn't know what the object was, but I knew it was something important.
I entered the building cautiously, my heart pounding in my chest. The air was thick with the smell of mold and decay. I climbed the stairs, my footsteps echoing through the empty corridors.
When I reached the second floor, I saw a door at the end of the hallway. It was the only door in the entire building that wasn't boarded up or locked. I knew that was the room I had to enter.
I pushed the door open slowly, and my heart stopped. Inside, there was a figure sitting in the corner of the room. It was a woman, but she was covered in blood and her eyes were empty sockets.
I screamed and ran out of the room, but I knew that I had failed the challenge. I had lost the game.
The next day, I woke up in my bed, covered in sweat. I thought it had all been a nightmare, but then I saw the envelope on my nightstand. Inside was a note that said, "Congratulations. You have won the game."

I love names like Merit, Lucy, Scout, Clara, Etta, etc. My s/o has vetoed all of these. He likes “Lily Belle,” which I think is a fine nickname (it’s a play on one of my nicknames), but I’d like any potential daughters to have names they can take into adulthood and be seen professionally with. Lily Belle does not fit the bill in my mind. Do y’all have any other suggestions for a girl? Last name is a southern (or English) city, 10 letters, would like to keep first name short.
Boys names we already picked are: James Everett David Scott or Scottie
Family names of people we are open to honoring include: Scott Claire Johnathon Harry James Jennifer Sidney Everett Rhonda Catfish Ernestine

This is the best tl;dr I could make, original reduced by 53%. (I'm a bot)

WASHINGTON, May 29 - U.S. President Joe Biden said Turkish President Tayyip Erdogan in a call on Monday repeated Ankara's desire to buy F-16 fighter jets from the United States, while Biden told him Washington wanted Ankara to drop its objection to Sweden's joining NATO. The exchange took place when Biden called Erdogan to congratulate him on his victory in Turkey's presidential election on Sunday.
Asked if he expected any movement from Erdogan on Sweden's NATO membership, Biden said: "I raised that issue with him. We're going to talk more about it next week."
The sale has been stalled due to objections from the U.S. Congress over Ankara's refusal to green light to NATO enlargement, its human rights record and Syria policy, even though the Biden administration has repeatedly said it supports the sale.
The Biden administration has repeatedly rejected any assertion of any "Quid pro quo" between the sale and the NATO enlargement, although Turkish Foreign Minister Mevlut Cavusoglu in January said the U.S. side made it clear that an approval of NATO bids would be viewed positively by the Congress.
A bipartisan group of senators in a February letter to Biden said Turkey's failure to ratify the accession protocols for Sweden and Finland, which was still waiting at the time, would "Call into question this pending sale", referring to the F-16s. A source familiar with the discussions said the United States had previously told Turkey it would be hard to get Congress to approve the F-16 deal if Ankara doesn't green light Sweden.
Seeing Sweden join NATO by mid-July when the alliance is due to hold a leaders summit in Lithuania is among the top priorities for Washington.

Summary Source FAQ Feedback Top keywords: Sweden^#1 NATO^#2 Biden^#3 Turkey^#4 Erdogan^#5
Post found in /UkrainianConflict, /europe and /worldnews.
NOTICE: This thread is for discussing the submission topic. Please do not discuss the concept of the autotldr bot here.

Gawd she keeps stalking me. But hasn't changed a bit.
She somehow found my adres because the last 2 years she keeps sending me letters on my birthday... sorry I mean HER birthday since that is what the card says.. my birthday is actually her birthday and she demands I congratulate her because she birthed me that day and it is actually HER day... sigh..(in the meantime I do not celebrate my birthday and do not give an rats fluffy behind because she started with that when young so it never was a fun day...)
But my phone broke recently. And apparently numbers get unblocked then. So she also started messaging me..
And it is so... baffeling. And sad. I have 1 friend that understands... but a lot of people seem to... think I make this up. Say stuff like "no, moms would never do that!!!!" etc. I hope I can vent here.
Man I feel so... sad. I told her again that I would like a mothedaughter bond. I kinda really miss a parent. And I kinda keep being clear in the hope it changes. But everything what comes out of her mouth is so... idiotic. It baffled me completely.
I told her; I would like a mothedaughter bond. Talking about stuff. We really look alike; and idk how is/was your life as a woman or something? What can I expect when aging? A real connection with you. Being a mom and daughter.
her answer:
"No you are demanding too much from me, I can't do that".
Me: ?? You can't be a mom? That kinda hurts.
" I don't care about your opinion"
Me: that also is kinda unkind and hurts...
"yeah well, I have an awesome life. I have amazing friends and a lot of hobby's and have 5 times sex a day"
Me: Uh.. wel ok. Congrats. I wish for everyone to have a fun/healthy sexlife who wants it.. but that was not really the question and topic. I askes you for a bond together.
"No I can't, I'm scared of you"
Me in my head tableflipping... due to being raised by her I have major issues with not being a doormath...gawd I am scared of literally EVERYTHING (anxiety disorder) and my hobby's are birdwatching for Pete's sake and all kinds of silent hobby's so noone notices me because I'm too used as child that you randomly could be smacked by her by just breahting.. I can 100% say of myself that it is incredibly hard to be scared of me.. uurgh!!! I did not reply anymore and vented to a friend.
3 hours later she sends a new message..
"Hey, what do you think about the fact I can't love you"
(I need more tables...to flip..)
My baffled dumbass: That really hurts me. And if that is really the case that you can't love people maybe you should do something with that. I think it is quite normal and healthy that people can feel love. It can be a sign that something is not okay if you can't feel love.
Her: No! Everyone has a little bit of autism and I have a great life and am not senile, just completed a marathon and have the best partner ever and still a lot of men want me!!
GAAAAAWD. I did not say that... geez. I always have the feeling with her that she sees me as competition. Which she does because omg how mad did she get when I was a child and got some compliment from someone on a drawing I made.. you know how normal people tell children all the time that their rake-hand-stick figures is the best art ever..she could not handle that. Became jealous. On a child...And it always turns back to that. The amount as child I had to hear from her that she never wanted a daughter because women are stupid and suck not unlike boys..absoltely confused me so hard that I thought I was trans. Because maybe if I was a boy she would love me. And everything with her is so... an flex. Always talking about sex/how young she looks/how cool her life is... it really feels if she actually is jealous of me.. But I don't understand why... how can you be jealous of a child..oh my how mad and vile she became when young when I cuddled my dad.. as if I wanted to steal him away from her.. I'm a fricking 4yo child cuddeling her dad and she gets livid... not because she wants me to cuddle her.. no litterally that she thinks that my dad and I are going to get married or something... I will steal him away from her.. sigh.
Bleh. I so do not understand her. Is she born like that/did something happen in her life? How can you be jealous of a child and see it as competition? Your own child even.. Urgh I don't even have a name. She so not wanted a daughter.. stubbornly. That she made a list of names for boys and none for girls. I came out with a vagina.. which she already knew because doctors have told her that and she kept just saying "no, it's a boy"...My name is now the name of the female child from the woman next to her that delivered a baby..because she had to choose a name fast...and she didn't have any so she just copied that... The only good thing that came out of it that I got so mad/frustrated I typed out certain feelings that I should do more often. I'm asexual. Tried to tell her that loads of times but she never listens. That makes it more dumb and annoying her non-stop weird flexing about how much sex she has.. because I don't have that. Those feelings. her answer " oh...". As in.. she got stuck. Because apparently she indeed thought my whole life that she could "get at me" by having more sex or something.. and me being asexual was not something she thought about and now her weird plan got stuck. Now she does not know anymore how to flex me or something..
I tried so much my whole life. That specific anti-women and sex-focus.. I have thought about if she maybe has something traumatic happened and such and asked a lot. It's not uncommon if you are abused as an child an trauma can manifest like that. Internalised mysogyny or expresive sexual behaviour etc. But no... that is just me making excuses for her. Hoping that it has a reason/explanation so I can put it in a box better and understand her better and I offcourse really want a parent and keep hoping.. but their ain't no reason... this is just how she is. And I'm so tired and done for 37 years begging if she wants to be my mom... and I think this was the final straw and I can close it. It is just never going to happen. But it is scary.. being an orphan with alive parents.. I feel like I finally hit the rock bottom that I can say bye to her forever. And it feels like an relief. A heavy load from my back. But I rather would have had an parent. I hate it how her behaviour fucked up my life so hard.. that I know at age 37 have to learn how to adult. Am now 18/21... I still have to do a study/get a drivers licence/get a job/house/partner and children maybe/etc. everything. Because these people.. they kinda keep you on a leash with loads of gaslighting. Barge now and then back in your life to quickly tell you how much you suck and then go on with their day... not noticing that what they say makes an impact.. for 37 years I'm stuck and crying and my whole life revolves around getting "appreciated" by mom... even when she is not even here.. went NC 5 years ago.. but that is what they do. Keeping you small.
And I hate it all...because I KNOW she is one of those parents that is going to do the switcheroo. Because she already did a hundred times. She keeps telling people "how hard it is for her being a mom of an autistic child". I found that out because we worked in the same compagny.. that she tells my colleagues that... but I do not have autism. I would not be ashamed if I did. Normal human form of having a brain. And the picture that she send me through not accidentally being unblocked anymore.. omg. She did a.. what is the English name. When you walk or bicycle to santiago de compostella or mecca and such. With my face on it... most people that do that over here.. have a shirt with their child's face because it died from cancer and do that walk to raise money for a cancer research foundation so future other children can be helped better.. then this idiot is walking with them with a much alive child... but acting and stealing the show that her life is way harder and exactly the same as these normal kind parents with an dead child.. I feel so incredibly embarresed. I just know she is like that weird mom that is kinda known in the Ncommunity...but I forgot her name.. that she makes blogs about how hard and tough a life as a mother is when your children go no contact... and revert it in that way. That is super hurtfull and the biggest boohoo unfairness ever if a child suddenly out of nowhere goes no contact.. but we all know that she asked for it. The amount of ilnesses I have behind my back, and in hindsight explains why people suddenly act differently towards me, and is especially hard for her.. as mom of... I'm already curious what it will be now... I'm putting my money on being lesbian and somehow that is the reason that I do not have contact with her... since I told her that I'm asexual. But you never know.. it can be anything from the DSMV as long as she can get attention from it..
Thank for being allowed to rant. I understand why people say "no you are lieing/making this up no parent/mom would do that!!" Because yeah. Same. I also feel like I am living in a movie. This stuff you see on tv but never really think it happeneds in your life. It's weird to begin to realise that... you are that person on tv.. When all the times you have been laying on the couch munching popcorn watching "mommy dearest" and thinking.. good movie. That was fun. Good watch. And then when it hits en sets in.. wait....this movie is about me =/ f*ck...
Edit: weird paragraphs because I had to re-do this for using a word that is in my language not a slur lol. A certain word for certain women who like women we reclaim. And you can be proud of. Nothing so cool as a woman going her own way. Wait is butch allowed? I'm not always sure which words in US are allowed or not.. anyway it was the same word but then apparently is that seen as offensive; not my intention to offend. I fricking love these women liking women and don't giving a rats arse about society. Where can I sign up? In my language... where the word comes from lol.. it's an possitive haha! oh gawd automod.. it is even actually my last name lol. Number 1 most common last name over here lol. (hence I can say that.. because it's so common I'm not actually sharing my private info..since good luck finding me in the ocean of people with the same last name lol). (ocean pun accidentally but fitting).

I awoke with a thumping headache and forced myself to sit up. The pungent stench of urine and god knows what else immediately assailed my nose. I looked around me to see dozens of people wearing the same clothing surrounding me.
We appeared to be in a small cramped location that didn't appear to have any toilets and unfortunately no ventilation. There was a section of the room which was empty and I could tell by the contents of the floor that this was the cause of the smell. The lack of toilets had meant that people had no choice but to improvise.
I gazed around at the other people that were around me and they all looked terrified. I tried speaking to some of them but they just hushed me and indicated for me to leave them alone. They were a mixture of people with every age group and ethnicity included. I could see one woman who looked like she was in her nineties and was using two walking sticks to stand upright.
We sat there for a few more hours with the stench becoming more and more unbearable. A loud buzzer went off which resulted in a few people screaming in shock. We watched as a door slowly began to open in the corner of the room. I was the first one to get up and carefully made my way forward. I peered out to see what appeared to be a large open factory building outside.
I contemplated staying where I was, but I was getting more and more lightheaded with the smells so I decided to leave. The others slowly began to follow me out and we all stood clustered together.
A screeching noise of feedback emerged from speakers which I finally spotted dotted around the building. A voice came over the speakers and announced "Welcome to the latest season of America's Next Top Serial Killer".
We all stood there in shock as the voice told us we were the intended victims who were going to help decide who this season's winner was. They thanked us for our help and promised our bodies would be disposed of in a humane way.
Four doors opened in front of us and out walked a number of terrifying looking people. The speaker told us that we were welcoming four new killers who were vying for the title of this year's ultimate serial killer. We were introduced to them one by one with a quick synopsis.
First was the Nun who wore a nun's outfit which was splattered in blood. I would have considered her beautiful apart from the fact that her eyes were completely bloodshot. The only thing she held were rosary beads which looked very used.
Next was the Reaper who stood there in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. He was wearing a mask that looked like it had once been the design of Robin Williams face. He held a shovel in his hands and kept spinning it around.
Then came the Boyscout who wore clothes that were 3 or four sizes too small for him. His scouting uniform looked like it had seen better days. He carried a branch that he was sharpening with a penknife and kept jabbing it towards us.
Finally he announced the Headmaster who stood there gazing at us with a look of pure disgust. He carried two metal rulers that were almost half the height of him. He reminded me so much of some of my old teachers that I involuntarily took a step backwards when his eyes rested on me.
One of the other victims went towards the Nun and begged her to help him as he had a wife and family. She smiled at him for a few seconds before wrapping the rosary beads around his throat and ripping his throat open.
A fountain of blood sprayed out of his throat and a small bit splattered onto my clothes. Pandemonium ensued as everyone around me began running off in every conceivable direction. The killers began moving forward and lashing out at anyone that got too close. I saw the old woman with the walking sticks get decapitated. The Reaper had knocked her to the ground and then used the shovel to cut off her head.
I stood there frozen in fear as I watched the killers slaughter numerous people. The Headmaster was using his rulers to slash into people's skin and then hitting against their throat to crush their larynx. The Boyscout was using his branch as a spear and I watched him shove it through someone's eye and out the other side of her skull.
I finally convinced my feet to start moving and began dodging between the corpses that littered the floor. I felt something brush by the hair at the back of my head and knew that one of them had come very close to catching me.
I found an unlocked door at the door at the other end of the building and yelled at the others. A few of the other victims must have heard me as they began rushing towards freedom. The killers were occupied in killing off any of the injured.
I rushed outside into bright sunshine and had to shield my eyes for a few moments. I eventually gazed around to see a small clearing with a forest in the distance. The other victims began running past me and began heading for cover in the forest. I reached the edge of the forest and gazed back to see the killers emerge from the building. I had a good headstart and knew that it would take them a while to catch up with me.
I began to jog slowly while taking the occasional break to conserve my stamina. It was about twenty minutes after entering the forest when I heard a noise coming from somewhere to my left. I looked in amazement as the four killers passed close by while riding a group of ponies. The Nun looked terrified and was clutching onto the poor animal's neck.
The Reaper spotted me and swerved his pony over towards me. He jumped off and began to swing his shovel all around him in an obvious attempt to intimidate me. I nearly burst out laughing when he somehow got the shovel stuck in a low hanging branch. I spotted a thick branch on the ground and smashed him over the head with it. He collapsed face first onto the ground and tried to get up. I started smashing the branch into the back of his skull until the branch eventually snapped. I reached up and grabbed his shovel and used it to finish the job of crushing in his skull. I noticed a camera in one of the trees and realised they were filming everything that was happening here.
His pony was grazing only a short distance away so I climbed on its back and began moving forward. I passed the corpses of some of the other victims who had obviously been caught by the killers. I spotted a building ahead and made my way towards it.
I stopped at the entrance to what was obviously once a school and hopped off the pony. He just wandered off straight away and began eating the grass that lay nearby. I held the shovel in my hands and took two deep breaths before making my way inside.
I was greeted by the bodies of more victims who looked like they had tried to put up a fight and lost badly. Their bodies were covered in multiple stab wounds and each of them had their eyes ripped out. I was still standing there gazing down at their bodies when I heard a noise directly behind me. I swung the shovel around in reflex in the hopes of taking out one of the victims. I froze in shock as I watched the shovel smash into a woman's skull. Her accusatory eyes stared at me before her corpse crumpled to the ground.
Someone began clapping and I saw the Headmaster step out of a room with a sinister smile on his face. He reached behind him and grabbed the rulers and began to advance on me. I held the shovel in front of me in the hopes of using it to block his blows. He swung one of the rulers and I felt a stinging sensation on my arm as the ruler connected. His smile grew wider as he had drawn first blood. He began to move quicker and I was constantly having to adjust myself to keep him at a distance. He rushed forward towards me and I dodged him. I stuck a foot out and watched in glee as he fell onto the ground. One of the rulers went flying out of his hand and he began reaching to grab it.
I brought the shovel down and listened to his scream of anguish as I cut off his hand. I celebrated internally as I rushed past him and grabbed the fallen ruler. He stood up and faced me with tears of pain cascading down his face. I now held the ruler in my hand and began moving towards him. He began to back away while swinging his other ruler to keep me at bay. He wasn't paying attention to what was behind him and tripped over the body of the woman I had accidentally killed earlier. He began pleading with me to stop but I felt no remorse as I brought the ruler down and crushed his throat. I searched through the room he had come from earlier and found some food and water. I had a quick meal and decided to have some sleep as it was starting to get dark outside.
The next morning I awoke and began gathering up what food and water that I had already eaten and prepared to head out. I decided on a whim to check the Headmaster's pockets and lucked out as I found a set of keys.
I went to the opposite entrance of the building and peered out to see nothing moving. I explored outside and found two quads hidden beneath some branches. I tried the key in both and was relieved when it worked in the first. I decided my only course of action was to keep going forward as there was only death in front of me. I made a harness using the branches to hold my supplies and the weapons I had collected.
For the next twenty minutes I moved along at a leisurely pace through fields of daffodils. I could see tracks crossing my path possibly made by the other victims and remaining killers.
I saw something on the ground ahead and slowed down to check it out. I quickly grabbed my weapons just in case it was a trap. I found a young girl who looked like she was no older than 12. She was luckily just asleep and I went over and got her some food and water. She woke up screaming after I tapped her on the shoulder. I quickly calmed her down after explaining that I wasn't one of them. She still looked weary but gladly accepted the food I offered.
I started heading towards the quad to get more food for her and had only moved a short distance away when I heard a noise behind me. I turned to see the Nun standing behind the girl with the rosary beads wrapped around her neck. The little girl gave me a pleading look moments before the nun slit her throat. The spray of blood turned all of the daffodils around us crimson. The Nun smiled at me and began inching towards me. I backed up towards the quad and grabbed the rulers.
The Nun stopped coming forward and gazed in annoyance at the rulers. She was obviously used to close quarter kills so I now had the advantage over her. She began circling me in the hopes of getting around my defenses. I watched her carefully and waited for her to make the first move. She darted forward so I whacked her hand with the ruler and she let out a squeal of pain. She looked furious at this point as there was a small bruise forming where I hit her. She continued circling me while occasionally darting forward before being forced back by the rulers.
I decided I needed to go on the offensive and lurched towards her. She seemed surprised at this and didn't even have time to defend herself as I smashed her across the face. She moved backwards and spit out some blood that contained a tooth. I began to attack her repeatedly and soon her face and hands were littered with cuts and bruises. She fell to the ground in the fetal position to try and protect herself. I grabbed the rosary beads that she had dropped and wrapped it around her throat. I think she was about to say something but I didn't give her a chance as I ended her life the same way she had ended the little girls. I threw the rosary beads on top of her corpse before spitting on her and making my way back to the quad.
I moved along at a quicker pace and began seeing more corpses who had makeshift arrows sticking out of their body. I decided it might be better to go on foot incase I wandered into an ambush. I dodged from tree to tree while constantly looking in every direction. The forest was deathly silent as if in anticipation of what was coming.
I was making my way across a small clearing when I felt an agonising pain in my right leg. I almost wept as I saw the arrow that now protruded from it. I tried to continue going forward but my leg gave out beneath me. I heard a manical laugh coming from the trees and the Boyscout moved out carrying a homemade bow. He threw it to one side and grabbed his penknife. He advanced forward to kill me while I was wounded. I started to crawl towards my supplies and had just put my hand on them when I was dragged away. I turned to see the Boyscout smiling down at me. I instinct lashed out with my uninjured foot and hit him in the testicles. The smile on his face disappeared as he crumpled to the ground. I reached down and snapped the arrow head that was in my leg and jammed it into his ear.
He began convulsing on the ground for a few seconds before finally going still. Music began playing and a number of heavily armed moved towards me. They were flanking someone who looked vaguely familiar. I think I had seen him in some straight to video movies over the years. He congratulated me on winning this year's tournament as I lay there in shock. He started asking me questions but I was too stunned to answer.
This happened a few months ago and I am still coming to terms with everything that transpired. I was given a million bucks in prize money and made to sign a number of legal documents to ensure my silence. I haven't been able to find this show but I know it is out there somewhere on the dark web. I just hope that if any of you take part then you will fight back like I did.

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