I didn’t think I was ever going to be moved enough to write this post.
One of the casualties of depression is losing interest in pleasures and passions you once enjoyed. Writing happens to be one of those passions and I’ve written nary-a-whisper of a word in three months. But now, I feel inspired enough to break down my experience on Bupropion week by week.
WEEK 1: I was overjoyed! The proverbial placebo effect kicked in on the first two days. Days three through seven I just about gave up (for the first time…we’re not done almost giving up just yet). For five solid nights I woke up nearly a dozen times. The insomnia was terrifying. I’d wake up in sweat, then waves of panic would wash over me. Each night I would take to the forums and drug review sites, reassure myself that I wasn’t dying, then I’d get to sleep at about 5AM.
WEEK 2: I’d only wake up four or five times a night. Then, after about ten days, I finally began sleeping through the night. However, I began experiencing mood swings. Almost like I was rapid-cycling through depression and anxiety a few times a day. I could almost feel the medication messing with my neurology which was frustratingly fascinating. But I knew it had begun working in my favor and that helped my self-talk quite a bit even in the throws of a depressive spell.
WEEK 3: This is where I nearly gave up the second time. If ever there was an emotional hell-week for Navy Seals…this would have been a perfect model. Anxiety I’d never known before dropped-kicked me out of orbit. I usually walk about four miles a day but I found that I couldn’t stay in my apartment for fear the walls would start behaving like that compactor Luke, Han, Chewy and Leia were stuck in whilst R2 was f*cking about upstairs doing nothing. After that, I started putting on 25,000 steps a day (if Apple’s Health app is to be believed). I could tangibly feel the anxiety whirling around right underneath my sternum. My hands and feet would vibrate and buzz. After two days of this, I decided to spend the next few nights at my sister’s house so she could make sure I didn’t die.
WEEK 4: It was at my sister’s house that some biochemical switch was thrown. I’m not certain this wasn’t a combination of the new medication playing nice with the new neural networks it helped form and the change of environment and being around family rather than at home alone. Either way, I started feeling what you might call ‘contentment’. I actually started to forget I was on medication at all.
WEEK 5: This is where I started noticing fluctuations between nervousness and melancholy. Not pronounced at all; just a frivolous tennis match between light anxiety and subtle sadness. I could almost imagine the medication poking and prodding at its own craftsmanship to determine whether or not it would hold should the storms return. Early in the evening on about day 30, out of the blue, I got hit with a pretty good uppercut from depression. That was really disappointing. But the next day when it returned, it only stuck around for an hour.
WEEK 6: The most consistent week yet. But I also made note in my journal that I’ve been working on other facets of the depression alongside the medication. I start my first CBT session next week and just knowing that has helped. I still walk 20-25,000 steps a day. I’m drinking two to three glasses of water a day (after drinking zero glasses a day for 20 years). I also got my first spark of inspiration to write music, play guitar and even tackle some lyrics. I didn’t even want to think about those things a year ago.
WEEK 7: This is where I find myself now. Last night I had a bit of melancholy but some of that has to do with the loneliness of living alone without distractions (like drinking, staying up all night binge watching Netflix or burying myself in creative projects to avoid working on personal issues). It’s not easy to face yourself without distractions. That said, Bupropion is really starting to make the process easier. Having been on both Celexa and Lexapro years ago, I can tell you confidently that this medication truly lives up to the predominantly-great reviews it gets.
If you’ve just started this drug and you’re neck-deep in side effects, just stick it out. You won’t regret it.

I’m going to share some stuff I’m ashamed of. My background and some of the behaviors I’ve had. I growing up was a fat kid, I weighed 310 lbs at my heaviest at 16, I lost a ton of weight and at 18 I weighed 180 lbs, then I went to the gym a lot and I’m 20 and I fluctuate from 170-176 lbs, I’m athletic, and if I’m really active I have abs. I also have really good hair and a decent beard. The thing is I feel deep down that I am ugly, that everyone is looking at me and thinking I’m ugly, that people giving me any sort of “romantic attention” is fake. I check pictures of myself almost every single day because of how self conscious I am of my appearance. I genuinely hate how I look, and the thing is I don’t think there is anything more I could do to improve my appearance. Like if I really wanted to I could hit the gym and maybe get a more defined jawline and bigger muscles but that’s it. I dress good, but I don’t know man, it all just feels fake. I think this stems from my failures romantically. I’ve had friends who are women say that I am a very attractive man. My best friends’ sister said that I am “fine”. One time in my biology lab last year, I had a girl directly put her leg on me in the middle of the lab and flirt heavily with me. The thing is I don’t believe any of this, like it all just feels fake, I’ve never truly asked a girl out. I mean I “asked out” a girl from one of the lectures I’m in and we went to get coffee and the zoo, we would FaceTime for like 3-4 hours a lot and got coffee together like everyday. But she ended up just seeing me as a friend, which totally sucked butt. The thing is with all of this is these have heavily punched my self esteem and I feel ugly. It’s weird because the standards I set for myself are so unrealistic and insane that the majority of people don’t even fulfill them and this just makes me feel like an odd freak. The thing is that I just want a normal relationship, but all these past wounds and shortcomings make me feel like I’m too broken and then that just leads me into “self improvement” which leads to the negative behaviors I mentioned above.

This is the best tl;dr I could make, original reduced by 65%. (I'm a bot)

WELLINGTON, New Zealand - Fiji's leader indicated Wednesday his nation is reconsidering its security ties with China at a time that geopolitical tensions in the Pacific are rising.
Prime Minister Sitiveni Rabuka said Fiji was reviewing a contentious police cooperation agreement it signed with China in 2011 that has allowed Chinese police officers to be stationed in Fiji.
Fiji expanded its policing agreement with China in 2013 to include some military cooperation, but Rabuka on Wednesday didn't directly address that arrangement.
China has previously said the security agreements have benefited Fiji and it hopes to continue the collaboration.
Rabuka has moved since then to distance himself from some of Bainimarama's policies, including moves to forge closer ties with China.
Last year, Solomon Islands signed its own security pact with China, a move that raised alarm throughout the Pacific.

Summary Source FAQ Feedback Top keywords: Fiji^#1 China^#2 New^#3 Rabuka^#4 agreement^#5
Post found in /worldnews.
NOTICE: This thread is for discussing the submission topic. Please do not discuss the concept of the autotldr bot here.

TW: SA
Hey THT! This is my first Reddit post so forgive me if it’s a little awkward. There’s a long story behind this but basically as the title said I’m considering taking my (18 F) father (50-something M) to court for sexual assault. To give context I’ve grown up in a family of four (me, mom, dad, brother) for my whole life. My mom and dad never seemed to have any major conflicts and life seemed good. That is until when I was 17 my mom found out that my dad was cheating on her from women from his hometown and tried to get him to go to therapy with her to work it out. She didn’t tell my brother and I about this because she was trying to protect us and keep our family together. Several months after she found this out (July of 2022) my dad and I were chilling on the couch together and I was drifting in and out of sleep while he massaged my lower legs. He and I had always had a more physical relationship so this wasn’t a really weird thing- or at least I didn’t think it was until I woke up and saw him touching my very inappropriately. I didn’t know at the time that what he did was actually sexual assault but it in fact was (although it was mild compared to stories I’ve heard from others about their experiences so part of me still questions whether or not what he did was that extreme but others have told me it is so I guess I’ll believe him). Anyway, my mom got him kicked out within the week and it’s been a year of processing and healing for my mom, brother and I. In the process too we also realized how toxic he was and how emotionally abusive he was towards my brother. I’ve tried to stay away from him as much as possible but throughout the year he’s kept contacting me via email and letters and voicemail from anonymous phone numbers. I have his number blocked but not his email because one time he emailed me wanting to come visit me on my college campus and I had to get campus security and the police involved and I’m scared that he’ll email again and if I don’t respond he’ll just come without notice. I’m so sick of him contacting me and the people I care for and he has been explicitly told verbally from my moms lawyer not to contact me and he still kept contacting me anyways. I am so sick of how much anxiety it causes me every time he does this and so I see no other choice than to go to court against him to try and at least get a restraining order or something, but ideally get him charged for sexual assault. I’m still very conflicted about it though because of the toll it could take on my mental health (which was kinda crappy before all this began anyways). Sorry if this was kinda spotty but I just don’t know what to do anymore and I could really use some advice. Thanks so much <3

Hi,
I am a work in progress. But I still think I’m ready for a loving relationship. I want to start the journey with my person.
I’m 27 years old and I have a fairly significant physical disability, cerebral palsy. That basically means that I need help with almost everything, from bathing, dressing, all that good stuff like that. I’ve had a couple other setbacks as well that have prevented me from really pursuing independence, but I’m starting that journey now in earnest. This might be TMI but I’m setting up a meeting with my parents so we can discuss a roadmap to maximum independence.
Having a disability has made it hard to “find myself.”I have a few major interests, namely politics, geography, and history. But I’m looking for more hobbies. I’ll be completely honest. It’s tough to develop your own identity when you rely someone else’s help That said, I do have a great passion for learning. Wikipedia is my favorite website in the world and I just love knowing a little bit about a lot of things.
As for TV, I like stand-up comedy, Saturday Night Live, Futurama, Ted Lasso. On the dramatic side, I like Breaking Bad Better Call Saul, Severance, stuff like that.
And I absolutely love music. I know that sounds generic but I literally have my headphones on for the majority of my date. It’s hard to talk about favorite artist or genres because I’m the type of person to find a song on spotify and play it over and over and over. Sometimes it is here a certain song, no matter the genre, and it just grabs me. In fact, I find it easier to communicate my feelings through song lyrics most of the time.
Now, for what I’m really passionate about, politics. I am a committed progressive/social democrat. Basically, I believe every human should be free to live how they wish, so long as they don’t harm others or themselves. This means I believe deeply in women’s rights and LGBTQ+ rights. I also believe that America, as a wealthy nation, has the resources to take care of its citizens. I believe in free enterprise, but I also believe that the government should create conditions which allow people to pursue full and fulfilling lives. This means support for a living wage, healthcare as a right, paid time off as a guarantee for every worker.
I’ve always felt this way but my philosophy really came together this past summer. My family and I were lucky enough to go on a trip to Ireland last July. We got to stay in a really nice hotel. Pretty much every room in the hotel had a view of this small lake. I don’t know what it was about that particular lake, but I couldn’t stop looking at it. I felt a sense of calm and contentment that I had never really felt before. And that's when I knew that everyone should be able to have the same feeling I had. At least a couple days a year where people can just relax, relatively free of worry. That’s what I want to fight for
Getting back to personal stuff. I also like to meet a girl and take her back to that hotel and share that sense of calm with her. Now, I am 5’7” tall and I am relatively heavy. I have a plan to lose some weight but it is difficult as someone who is relatively sedentary.
I am looking for a close and affectionate relationship. My disability has meant that I have had very little intimate contact of any kind. So I would like someone who is open-minded with a relatively high sex drive. I should say though. Due to disability reasons I may need a little blue pill. We can cross that bridge when we come to it though. I haven’t really experimented with it, but I am kink inclined. What that exactly means, I’m not sure yet.
I don’t really have any strict standards. All I ask is that you are between 20 and 35, single and willing to meet me relatively soon in Nashville, Tennessee.. I know I’m a work in progress. It’s going to take a where I’m going but I have a lot of love to give and I feel like I’m ready to give that to someone, at least.
Apologies for typos. They are pretty hard to avoid when using a dictation software.
As long as this is up, I am open to replies.
Face pic available upon request.

This weekend, I binged the new docuseries about the Duggars on Amazon. Granted, I knew going in it was gonna be a pretty unpleasant sit, but I did not expect it to reopen an old wound the way it did.
I didn’t grow up in a strict fundie background or in IBLP, and I thank my lucky stars. I grew up in a plain old boring Presbyterian church during the Bush years. The kids read Harry Potter and listened to secular music, it was comparatively chill. That doesn’t mean my church didn’t espouse purity/modesty culture.
The second episode of the miniseries is more or less a history of how IBLP came to be and a rundown of Bill Gothard’s strict teachings. There was a segment all about modesty and how women are to dress to protect men from “stumbling” because “mEn are ViSuAl cReAtUreS!!!” with Michelle instructing her daughters how to dress. That particular scene brought back some painful memories of wrestling with modesty culture.
I’ve always been quite voluptuous and generously endowed (was a DD as a teen, am a G now) so trying to find clothes that wouldn’t get me in trouble was always an uphill battle. Every shopping trip with my mother ended in tears. Everything that looked classy on other girls made me look like the secretary in every cheesy porno set in an office. I even remember taping my boobs down before Easter Sunday service so no guys would stare at my sinful chest. I’ve cried enough tears to fill an Olympic swimming pool.
I wondered how God could command His female believers to be modest, but intentionally create some women to have bodies like mine? That sounds quite cruel on God’s part. If God wanted all His women to be modest, wouldn’t He have made us all with body types that facilitated modesty?
As you can imagine, hearing all those messages affected my body image and self-esteem and I felt like my body was too sinful for a church setting, which is part of the reason I moved away from religion in my teens. I haven’t made any friends at church with my G-cups, and I’m certainly not gonna attract any suitors, but that’s not my problem. That’s their problem.
Has anyone else had hard feelings about modesty culture and felt victimized by it?

I met a man a little over a year ago and throughout this time, I’ve developed deep feelings for him. I’ve never expressed these feelings simply due to the fear of rejection-as well as losing out on what has been a great friendship. Part of me feels like he knows how I feel (simply based on my actions around and towards him) but he hasn’t said anything. Which leads me to believe it’s not mutual. Even though I’ve had people tell me they can see his mood shift to happier when I’m around. Could it be he’s waiting for me to say something first? Or are men just generally more friendly around their women friends and the notion that “maybe he does feel the same” is just all in my head? Andddd if it is all in my head, how do I get it out?!

I am 23. So when I was 18, I realized that I am bisexual. I didn’t realize I am physically bi until I watched…certain vids online lol. I didn’t realize that I am romantically bi until I developed a crush on a girl in one of my classes. I believe I would’ve realized that I am bi in middle school if my parents and others in my life didn’t insist that I was straight. I first questioned my sexuality in the 6th grade. I think that’s when I noticed some attraction to female celebs.
Idk why it freaked me out and made me cry. Idk why I didn’t want to be into girls. Maybe it was cause the ABA I went through as a kid (I’m autistic) made me conditioned to behave “normally”. My parents and therapist at the time just told me that I am not gay or bisexual. Like, apparently that wasn’t an option. I think my brain tried its best to block out my feelings for girls until I had my gay awakenings at 18.
My dad isn’t accepting of me but with him, it’s that he’s being a dumb boomer. I don’t know what the hell to make of my mom’s lack of accepting me. She’d tell you she’s supportive of lgbt people but her actions say otherwise (unless it’s gay men) I’ve realized that she never wanted me to be queer based on these past experiences:
I had this friend in middle school I thought might be gay. The way my mom talked about how she assumed this girl was into me sounded like she was put off by this. My mother is literally more put off by a girl being into me more so than being sexually harassed. Also, in middle school, I watched “The Fosters”. My mom asked me rudely several times why I was watching a show about lesbians. She also told me I wasn’t allowed to watch Orange Is The New Black even though I was watching rated R movies that had straight sex scenes.
So I get to high school and have openly queer friends. One of my friends came out as bi (I think NB now? They identified as a girl at the time) and another came out as a lesbian. My mom didn’t seem to like to hear this. Later on in high school, she yelled at me because she was very put off by me discussing lgbt topics with her. She used “I’m an old person” as an excuse. With my bi friend, at first, my mom assumed they were actually a confused lesbian. Then, when they dated a guy, my mom assumed they were a confused straight girl.
So I had a couple friends in HS that I would do these fictional role play stories with. We would have characters. They were romantic stories but we were just playing characters- it wasn’t like there was interest. And so what if there was? I wasn’t into these girls and they weren’t into me but so what if there was attraction? I told my mom that I was doing this and she got upset. She told me to stop doing this so many times until I stopped. I eventually did at least one of the role plays in secret.
My assumption is she thought these girls were trying to get with me and that made her pissed. But she had no problem if one of my guy friends showed attraction to me. I did tell her I’m bi. She at first suggested it’s because I just find celebs attractive to look at and having lgbt friends made me assume that I am bi.
She also always acts like bi people will stray to one side. With me, she seems to think it’s men. She’s mentioned more recently she’s fine with me being with a woman but her indirect actions say otherwise. She acts weird when the topic of me liking women is brought up. When I told her about the girl I had feelings for in HS, she brought up multiple times how her name is weird. My mom has a less negative attitude at the prospect of me getting pregnant in college and having a baby in her home than towards me liking girls.
If it’s relevant, my mother is someone who has a very bad temper and she’s someone who I’ve realized has been trying to live vicariously through me for awhile. She is ridiculously obsessed with me finding an attractive man to the point where she was encouraging me to attract a 35 year old male yoga teacher who is in a 3 year relationship just because he is physically attractive.
She’s always wanted me to be this hyper feminine woman who wears makeup all the time, takes into account how attractive men find me, uses my appearance to get men to be interested in me and women to be friends with me, and be super into getting a conventionally attractive boyfriend- which are all qualities my mom has. This is not me and I don’t want it to be me. I don’t understand how my mom could claim to be accepting of me being with a woman but then do all this shit and then act like I’ll end up with a husband and children.
I’d hate to think that if I got a gf, my mom would find something to nitpick at her, especially her appearance (my mother is insanely obsessed with appearances). It would piss me the fuck off.
Edit: Also after I told my mom that I’m bi, she told me to not tell my aunt (her sister). Idk why but I felt she was concert that my aunt was going to encourage me to experiment with girls- which isn’t a bad thing. So what if I did that anyways? My aunt didn’t encourage me to do anything when I came out to her- she said that it’s beautiful that I like more than one gender lol.

Hello everyone, Have some items up for trade
All the buyouts for the selected items are just because of the rules.
I am open to discussing trades on Steam or Discord: Ab1r#1680 , feel free to add me there to discuss.
Some of the tradeable items are listed as follows:
TradeLink: https://steamcommunity.com/tradeoffenew/?partner=201510509&token=5HbDjuiH
-
Item Condition Float B/O
★ Stiletto Knife Damascus Steel MW 0.10 360$
★ Gut Knife Case Hardened MW 0.12 220$
★ Gut Knife Doppler Phase-2 FN 0.03 218$
★ Gut Knife Lore FT 0.27 210$
★ Paracord Knife Blue Steel MW 0.13 207$
★ Ursus Knife Blue Steel MW 0.13 206$
★ Gut Knife Doppler Phase-3 FN 195$
★ Moto Gloves Blood Pressure FT 0.37 187$
★ Nomad Knife Boreal Forest FT 0.19 186$
★ Stiletto Knife Boreal Forest BS 0.67 185$
★ Survival Knife Night Stripe MW 0.13 170$
★ ST Huntsman Knife Freehand FT 0.23 160$
★ Ursus Knife Night Stripe FT 0.34 157$
★ Falchion Knife Freehand BS 0.45 140$
★ Moto Gloves Cool Mint BS 0.75 136$
★ Bowie Knife Bright Water BS 0.47 127$
★ Ursus Knife Urban Masked BS 0.71 126$
★ Gut Knife Ultraviolet FT 0.16 111$
★ Gut Knife Scorched FT 0.23 96$
★ Moto Gloves Smoke Out BS 0.66 85$
★ Driver Gloves Rezan the Red WW 0.38 78$
★ Specialist Gloves Buckshot FT 0.34 76$
★ Hand Wraps Desert Shamagh BS 0.48 66$
★ Hand Wraps Duct Tape BS 0.65 65$
★ Hand Wraps Constrictor BS 0.45 64$
★ Hydra Gloves Emerald FT 0.30 63$
★ Hydra Gloves Mangrove FT 0.37 52$
AWP Wildfire FN 0.06 168$
M4A1-S Golden Coil MW 0.14 83$
UMP-45 Crime Scene FN 0.06 66$
USP-S Printstream FT 0.36 59$
AK-47 Asiimov MW 0.12 53$
AWP Chromatic Aberration FN 0.04 48$
M4A1-S Golden Coil FT 0.35 47$
ST AK-47 Redline FT 0.30 47$
M4A4 The Emperor MW 0.09 46$
ST M4A4 In Living Color MW 0.07 42$
M4A4 Neo-Noir FN 0.05 35$
AWP Hyper Beast FT 0.22 34$
Sir Bloody Darryl Royale The Professionals 21$
AK-47 Redline FT 0.27 19$
Glock-18 Bullet Queen MW 0.13 17$
P250 See Ya Later FN 0.06 12$
& more
Some prices might be outdated.
Note: I have new items coming and going daily and everything is not included in this list but everything is up for trade just send an offer!
TradeLink: https://steamcommunity.com/tradeoffenew/?partner=201510509&token=5HbDjuiH

Names changed for anonymity.
My elderly parents, John and Jane noticed a $6,000 check written out to a “Bob” on their account. Bob deposited it through a mobile app. At first we thought stolen check. Then noticed the check looked almost exactly like theirs but the address was missing a word in the street name. So forged check. Signed by my dads name in writing nothing like his. His sig is sloppy doctor like. This was large bubbly exaggerated writing like I’ve seen young women or even teens use.
Dad called the bank fraud line and got the payment stopped luckily as it was on hold in bobs account for a few days. Dad called the police and they said there’s no crime since you didn’t lose money. Wtf. Bank said they’d investigar but couldn’t share result of the investigation. They obviously know what account it was attempted to be deposited into so it’s infuriating no one will be held accountable.
Some other infuriating facts: —This bank has a $6000 daily limit on online mobile deposits. So they knew this limit obviously. —My dad went to the local branch and had the manager “Ed” cancel his checking account and open a new account. A week later my dad got the new checks and the names on the checks were not John and Jane. It said John and Bob with their respective last names. So the scammers name somehow added to my dads new account. He immediately talked to “Ed” and Ed oh yeah sorry that’s a mistake and he proceeded to supposedly close that account and open another under the right names. He said Ed got very nervous and dismissed that scammer name on the account quickly and changed subject very fast.
I dunno but this seems like an inside job to me. My dad has gotten nowhere with the bank or police. He is not out any money but I think some justice is needed here. My parents live in a low income retirement community so this guy who ever it is, is preying on the elderly and I hate it.
I was thinking of calling the banks corporate and telling this story but not sure if they’ll help me since its my dads account. My dad doesn’t want to deal with it but if I have any good suggestions I may be able to convince him to do something.

Hi everyone. M26, USA, 6’ tall, 210lbs
Prescriptions: finasteride 1mg daily
Non-prescription drugs used:
Testosterone enanthate 500mg weekly Nolvadex Tamoxifen 25mg daily Anavar 25mg daily Exemestane (aromastase inhibitor) 25mg every 3 days for 2 months (just started last week) Adderall 15mg prn (usually once/twice daily) Minoxidil topical solution Smokeable / edible Marijuana- daily, frequent use.
Chronic diagnoses: none
Family history: DM 2, HTN, CHF, Lung Cancer, Leukemia, Parksinsons
Shame me if you will but I am a pothead caregiver who works for a larger hospital, who has a pursuit for unnatural bodybuilding. Here’s my conundrum:
I am seeking to get a new PCP, and am considering getting one for the company I work for.
The safe use of anabolic steroids obviously come with a host of bloodwork that could be pretty damning, especially if I asked to receive a free testosterone draw. However concerning my cholesterol regarding the use of an aromatase Inhibitor and my hematocrit on test itself, it is very important I review these values.
As doctors are you under obligation to report suspicious employee health data to the company you are employed with or would that be a blatant violation of my HIPPAA rights unless the company made me take a NIDA / multipanel drug test? Without revealing my credentials we will say I work patient care, bedside. Should I be concerned to the point of finding an alternative care network? And if allowed, do you yourselves trust your own medical info for the companies you are employed by?
Thank you!

Let me lay down the groundwork.
I am 22. FtM. Started T at age 14 (I am 8 years on T), Top surgery (double incision) at 16, Hysterectomy at 20 (Kept the ovaries, but one had to be removed due to complications so now I only have one). I started female puberty at around age 8. I did have a puberty blocker put in at 14 but at that point I had already been going through female puberty for about 6 years so I’m not sure if it really blocked anything. I was never a girly girl, more like gender neutral with all of my interests as a child. Wearing feminine clothing would send me into a fit.
Now that that’s over with, I’ll begin explaining my problem. I have never liked myself. As long as I can remember, I’ve had body dysmorphia. I think as a teenager the dysmorphia was confused for gender dysphoria. I’ve never felt uncomfortable with my vagina. But I’ve never felt connected to my body. I thought that transitioning medically would make me connect with my body, thus making me happier. Now that I’m “done” with my transition, I realize that I still feel the same disconnection that I’ve always felt, if not more than ever. I’m very afraid of the implications of this revelation. I don’t think I am very feminine. But I realize now that you don’t have to be feminine to be female. I am not looking for affirmations or suggestions on what I should do, because that is something I need to find for myself. I am looking for hope that if I do decide to detransition it’ll be alright. I haven’t seen anyone on here who has detransitioned after being on T the amount of time I have been on. It’s weird because 8 years sounds like a long time on paper, but honestly it doesn’t FEEL very long to me. My voice is deep, but I have hope that if I do vocal training it could go up. Today I shaved off my beard/mustache and I saw a face that I recognize. I’m looking for detrans FtMtF success stories from women who were on T for a long time or had top surgery. I am desperately needing some positivity. Thank you.

Hello everyone, as you may have already heard, a recent Reddit policy change threatens to kill many beloved third-party mobile apps, making a great many quality-of-life features not seen in the official mobile app permanently inaccessible to users.
The Situation:
On May 31, 2023, Reddit announced they were raising the price to make calls to their API from being free to a level that will kill every third party app on Reddit, from Apollo to Reddit is Fun to Narwhal to BaconReader and numerous others. (‘API Calls’ are how apps get information from Reddit’s main servers to present to you).
Even if you’re not a mobile user and don’t use any of those apps, this is a step toward killing other ways of customizing Reddit, such as Reddit Enhancement Suite or the use of the old.reddit.com desktop interface. In addition, many 3rd party apps offer functions for those differently abled, such as blind users, functions that do not exist in Reddit’s official app.
This isn’t only a problem on the user level: many subreddit moderators depend on tools only available outside the official app to keep their communities on-topic and spam-free.
What’s the plan?
On June 12th, many subreddits will be going private (going ‘dark’) to protest this policy. Some will return after 48 hours, on June 14th. Others will go away permanently unless the issue is adequately addressed, since many moderators aren’t able to put in the work they do with the poor tools available through the official app. This isn’t something any of us do lightly: we do what we do because we love Reddit, and we truly believe this change will make it impossible to keep doing what we love. (Going private means means that only approved users will be able to access the subreddit. Since most subs don’t use ‘approved user’ functions, this means basically no one will be able to access those subreddits during that time.)
The two-day blackout isn’t the goal, and it isn’t the end. Should things reach the 14th with no sign of Reddit choosing to fix what they’ve broken, we’ll use the community and buzz we’ve built between then and now as a tool for further action.
What can you do?
• Learn more about the effort at Save3rdPartyApps/
• Complain. Message the mods of /reddit.com, who are the admins of the site: message reddit : submit a support request: comment in relevant threads on /reddit, leave a negative review on their official iOS or Android app- and sign your username in support to this post.
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I have 2 questions. Do menopause specialists require any mandatory testing before prescribing treatment? Or does it vary by provider? 2nd question-I started menopause at 57. Was on BHRT until 62/63 but it was pellets and the provider I was using I think switched to a cheaper compound provider as I saw a significant difference in effectiveness once she no longer used a well known company. So due to that, a move of her office further away and Covid-I stopped. I’m 65 now and would like to start again to see if I can get a positive effect on the bone/joint/anxiety/depression and libido issues I’m having. Am I too old? Would the thing to do is just call different providers and ask? I’d really like to hear from anyone my age that is on HRT-if it helps, what’s required etc. Thanks!

Link download: https://bestgraphicai.com/go/amazon-gorillaz-bootcamp--rob-fortney

What’s Inside The Boot Camp

• PICKING OUT A PRODUCT 10 Hours
• How to Set Up an Amazon Business
• Items to Avoid
• Too Much and Insufficient Competition
• Major Characteristics Of Product Champions
• Webinars on How To Find A Product (4)
• Purchasing goods 12 Hours
• Suppliers on Alibaba and Other Sites
• Making Contact With Suppliers and Dealing
• Establishing Product Inspections
• The Best Way To Ship Your Goods
• LAUNCH A PLAN 10 Hours
• How to Make a Successful Product Listing
• Promotions and Freebies
• Obtaining Your First Reviews
• Pay Per Click & Marketing Techniques
• How to Use Auto Responders After the Sale
• Navigational Guides and Workbooks
• Important Forms and Software Tools
• 50 hours of coaching sessions are available.
• Resource Directory
• Finding Products Software Training
• Webinars for Q&A

I am wondering if anyone in the group discovered they had an underlying mental health illness once they got sober.
I’m sober for a year and 8 months. I’ve started to wonder if I am bipolar. I am seeking a psychiatrist to start therapy, so I am being proactive in dealing with my issues.
I appreciate sharing your personal experience. Getting sober made me do a life review and now it’s dawning on me I don’t think it was all just alcohol. I’m seeing clear patterns of cycling of moods and in my down state, struggling to function. I’m kinda losing it internally.
Despite my mental health issues, I don’t want to drink. I’ve gotten past the desire to continue down that path and am comfortable in my sobriety. It’s now I’m finding I am not comfortable in my mental health and know I need to seek help.

TL:DR Below...
Background:
43/M/OR
Married: 2009
Discarded: 2019
Divorced: 2021
Kids: 2
So, I checked all the boxes before I got into my narc relationship. Nice guy and CoDependent, she was everything I wanted and "prayed for"... I was easy prey. I earned all the NarcAbuse badges from my service in the cold war called "my marriage"--Gaslit, narc was a "victim", manipulated, flying monkeys, love bombs, false reality, narc rage, sex as a weapon (dead bedroom), kids together, discarded, smear campaign, trauma bonded, No Contact, DEEP, Gray Rocking...I might be missing a few. I've made bed sheets and curtains from all the ignored red flags I've found, and I still have enough for a flag-football team.
Because I didn't give her the divorce she wanted (divorce was a hard no for me), she abused me even more. I could have destroyed her in the courts, but because of my trauma bond...I didn't...plus my kids would be alienated more.
So, once my discard...I moved in with my mother. Since I was a stay-at-home dad before the discard...I didn't have a full-time job. Thanks to COVID, I didn't get a real job till Jan of ’21. I avoided a trial and took her lawyer’s deal. More time with the kids, alimony, and joint custody.
Current:
My relationship with the kids is OK. I don't trust my kids like I used to. The smear campaign did a number on them. They are afraid to show emotions around me or say anything around their reversed gaslite situation (N-ex with a new supply, lesbian relationship now). I’ve held my ground with the n-ex when she tries to manipulate me. I’ve even had a lawyer send her a few letters when she broke the plan or didn't pay me.
I now support both my mother and now, my brother (moved in Spring of ’22 after becoming handicap) (I pay the rent and utilities). I moved away from them for a reason when I was in my early 20’s and now I’m back with them.
I have a job that pays “enough” to get by… I’m burnt out from my job. Solo IT guy for a company that my hard work goes to the retirement of the owners grand-kids
I’ve been on the dating “market” for almost a year now. That was eye opening. It felt good to be appreciated and to receive affection. I miss being a "husband". I may have “gone wild” a bit, but I am realizing what I want, and I am trying to be OK with the potential of “forever alone”.
I think I have PTSD from this war. Every e-mail from her has the potential of being a bomb (the anxiety sucks). This is not what I wanted for my life. I did the real work in my 20’s to be a good guy who wanted an honest life only to watch everything I ever loved in my life to be thrown out like garbage. I hate seeing her and her monkeys. My kids don’t feel like my kids anymore. I hate that this abuse has become my identity. I lost my 30's completely.
Not giving an ef about what other's think about me is maddening. I used to be part of a big community, and the stigma about being divorced because the "guy did something" is a load of crap. Women can be narcs too...
I think (fantasize) I will just will myself to get over this. To put my life back together. Well, after spending 10 year chasing the love of someone who sold me on the notion that they loved me, has me feeling done.
Request (TL/DR):
I NEED HELP!!!
My waistline, liver, and mental capacity have taken the most of the damage.
Thank God for the Narc YouTubers who helped me to be aware and what to do. I've looked into some of their programs. Finding a therapist has been rough. Most are booked up or they don't take my insurance. I've done a few support groups...I think I need 1on1. Not really sure what to do.
I'm tired. I'm tired of carring this and supporting everyone.
Again, not sure what to do, but I know I need help.
I'm open to convos, recommendations, resources...I feel lost.
Thank for reading and sharing the pain.

So my old dental office stopped accepting my insurance so I had to switch providers. I picked a new location that has pretty good reviews and is close to my home so I figured why not.
So I go in for my bi-annual cleaning and get told after x rays and exam that I have five cavities. I'm pretty shocked. They showed me on the screen that I have a visible tiny hole on one of my molars.
Now if they had told me I had one or two I wouldn't be questioning it much, my last dentist was seeing it as a problem area and had me on fluoride toothpaste as a wait and see process. But five?
I had one cavity as a child (in a baby tooth) and didn't have another until I was in my late 20's. I've had three fillings in total as an adult over a period of a few years, I can't help but be paranoid about suddenly being told I have five at once. My diet/teeth cleaning habits haven't changed much over the years.
I want to seek a second opinion but I've never done that before and am paranoid thinking how would I know if I can trust a second opinion either? I hate the feeling.
Any advice appreciated.

Here is my statistics. I am a rising senior and I would truly love to have some advice on my application. Thank you so much! :)) I apologize for how long this is
DemographicsGender: FemaleRace/Ethnicity: 1/2 White, 1/2 Asian 💀 (Both parents are immigrants but completed grad school in the US), so I am 2nd generation for college
Residence: US
Type of School: Competitive Public (Apart of STEM Magnet Program w/ around 70 selected students out of a class of 750 and features STEM classes w/ diff teachers and EC requirements)
Hooks: None 💀💀
Income: around 300-400kIntended Major: Biochemistry or Molecular Bio 😍🌿AcademicsGPA: 3.97UW (One 89 Freshman yr💀) 5.1 Weighted
Note: AP/College courses worth 6.0 at my schoolRank: 31/750, expect to go to at least 26/27 when SEM2 Junior yr updates# of Honors/AP/Dual Enrollment (all 4 yrs): 16 + 1 self study APSenior Year Course Load: AP Calc BC, AP Bio, AP Gov/AP Econ, AP Lit,
Standardized TestingSAT: N/A
ACT: 35 (35 W, 35 S, 34 R, 34 M) , technically 34.5 LMAO but they round so yay
My first attempt I got a 32, will not submit unless required.
AP: All 5s so far (freshman & sophomore yr) (AP Psych, AP World History, AP Comp Sci Principle, AP Human Geo)Extracurriculars/Activities (Not in proper order yet)

1. Nonprofit (Co-founder) (10-12)

Hosted hackathons with pretty high turnouts (500 submissions/10k in sponsor prizes), set up a tutoring network, donated over $1k to reduce healthcare disparities in Afghanistan. Hosted medical camps and had professors from CMU/NYU come out and talk to students via zoom.

1. Intern at local med school (11/12)

Helped assist with virology research. Helped Edit research papers, set up laboratory equipment, and shadow various processes

1. Intern at local Emergency Room (10,11,12)

shadowed numerous doctors and nurses. Wrote detailed case studies to understand medical symptoms. Assisted basic needs, vitals/giving towels

1. Vice President, National Honor Society (11/12)

Helped manage/ provide volunteer opportunities in student led organization to over 200 upperclassmen. A pretty big deal at my school.
5) Founder, president of Chem Olympiad Club (11.12)
Hosted meetings to prepare for the test. Covered a variety of subjects including Ochem. Although 3 of us were close, none of us advanced unfortunately. Plan to expand more next year. Overall I had fun with this club and it fueled my love for chem.

1. Vice President/Marketing Lead of Red Cross Club (11,12)

Helped created volunteer opportunities, held a blood drive, managed members in fulfilling service hours, led meetings alongside the founder.
7) President of Public Health Club (11,12)
- Created with my friend, we addressed current issues, donated sanitary supplies to local shelters and clinics. Wrote cards to ICU patients. Had healthcare professionals speak to a group of students on education required/overall aspects of job.
8) Secretary of Science Honor Society (11/12)Managed volunteer hours, meeting hours, help create sign-ins for meetings as well as communicating when meetings will occur.
9) Student created Business Club, member (10,11,12)
Hands-on collaboration with local businesses. Help with marketing, inventory management. Worked with a laboratory and a nonprofit. Helped advertise events to targeted demographic
10) Independent Research (10)
Placed at regionals, districts, and advanced in state as a finalist of about 800 kids in TX
I wont get too into it but it was related to biochem and tested whether a substance could alter the DNA of a strain of ecoli in a lab setting.
​
Awards/Honors
- State finalist in Science Fair
- 3rd place in regionals (Science Fair)
- Presidential service gold award x 2
- AP Scholar w/ distinction
- John Locke Essay comp, special awardLetters of Recommendation8.5/10: AP Chem Teacher: Pretty close with her, made the club & had her for two years. She is older and sometimes forgets what class period I am in but knows me as a student. We hugged on last day of school and I wrote her a very long card on how she inspired me to do pre-med and I frequently came during free blocks to review tests.
9/10: AP History, also NHS founder (I am VP), will def be working alongside him for a while. Also a lit major and I heard he writers bomb LORs. The only thing is I was pretty quiet in his class lol.
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EssaysI currently have a rough draft but idk if I want to trauma dump because every time I talk about it, it brings a lot of emotion. It's basically about the process of overcoming my mother being diagnosed with cancer and being told she had months to live. She was constantly in surgery/therapies. Thankfully, she is fine now, but it was a pretty low point in my life leading up to freshman year of HS. I also want to focus on how the event impacted my values/future goals/personality without it being a sob story if that makes sense.
Where I am ApplyingTexasI am currently auto-admit for UT (top 6% of my class)
Rice University
A&M (Safety)
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CaliforniaUSC (EA) My DREAM school since I was like 10 😍😍😍
All the UCs (UC Irvine, UCLA, UC Berkeley...)
Santa Clara Uni
MA: Boston Uni, Tufts, Northeastern, Boston College
Other Schools: UVA/UNC Chapel Hill, Umich, WashU, Notre Dame, CMU, NYU, Georgetown
Ivys: Cornell, Dartmouth, Brown, & UPenn (I do not expect to get in)
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Reflection
I would love if someone could humble me and also lmk where they could see me getting into. Again, any advice to improve my odds and responses are highly appreciated. Also if anyone has any recs on where I should ED to maximize chances that would be great.