Tiller to pull behind lawn mower

If I would have to describe my ex in as few words as possible it would be "broken promises". THe amount of times where he promised me something (a date, a concert, a gift...) and then found a reason why it didn't happen (overtime, sickness, "stuck in toll"...) was more often than I could count on two hands in the short span of 1.5 years of dating.
The breaking point of the relationship was when he planned a week in London for us which he too cancelled last minute. Naive me would have overlooked it like everything else if the week in question wouldn't have been Christmas week and I had to tell my whole family in advance I would not celebrate with them, only to join festivities last minute. I was quite embarrassed about it and decided that I was sick of always getting stood up. Still, even while ending the relationship I still liked him enough to want to stay friends. Well, he ghosted me with the excuse that he joined the army and that was it.
It's been 5 years since then and only last weekend I heard a very dear friends perspective on the whole relationship and a side to the story I was not aware of: there was another girl.
To make a "short story long", back at the time I was deep into playing a MMO. I got him to playing it as well. We were both in the same guild together with some other friends and acquaintances of mine. My dear friend was in there, as well as said other girl H. My ex and H quickly became friends and ran a lot of content in the MMO together, sometimes even content I had waited to do so I could play it with him. Never did I realise that H was messing with my relationship behind my back. My dear friend had realized it though and had told her off multiple times, warning her to not do it.
Now, one of the many broken promises of my ex was an orchestral concert to said MMO. It's the only promise I am really hung up on after all those years. It was a very rare time that the orchestral tour made it to Europe at all and I had planned to buy tickets, no matter what. Instead he bought them, even sent a picture of them to me as proof they arrived. I was so happy to see my favorite songs performed live, even pulled out my old fancy prom dress and everything - and then he cancelled. Said he has to work overtime, the tickets are at his living place an hour away from work and there was no way he could reach the tickets and give them to me so I could go with someone else. I was heartbroken, cried the whole night and even after all those years I am still sad about having missed the event. The tour hasn't been to Europe since and who knows when they will ever be again.
Last weekend, I met my dear friend and the topic came down to H and how she was a source of many problems back then, including the ruin of my relationship. My friend had elaborated and then said that at the time of the concert, H was not only visiting my country but also the same area me and my ex were living in. And the reason he had stood me up for the concert was, because he went with her instead. Since then I can't think about anything but that knowledge.
As I said, the relationship ended a few years ago. He since then ghosted me, I no longer have contact with H or that guild in general. My feelings for my ex are long gone. There is no reason for me to be sad or mad or anything about this whole affair. Yet here I am and I can't really stop thinking about it. What promises did he break because of lazy excuses? How many did he break while telling the truth? How many of those were because he did not want to tell me the truth?
When we broke up, I said to him that I can'T continue the relationship as is, but I would be open for reconciliation. He accepted the break up calmy with a "As I am now I can't be a man worthy of your love. You deserve better." Those words stuck with me. I thought he just appreciated me that much. Now they leave a bitter taste as well. Maybe they were his way of admitting to his own faults of cheating and lying. I don't know. I probably will never know. It sucks.
I don't know where else to put all these thoughts and feelings. I don't even know if I could get a conversation out of this. But it did feel cathargic to write this out somewhere. If you read until here, I thank you for your time.
People sometimes suck.

if it sounds too good to be true it always is and always will be a slave to the jews...and when I do become free they'll make the currency worthless and see how I react and keep a record of it...because they have done it all and seen
it all and they are stronger than me and have more teeth than me which means they have an advantage. When I become financially free women and girls will steal my money so that they can go off to the sunset or send men disguised as women after me...or diseased women and/or girls so that I am forced to pick up shit or nobody.
either way the goal is to control my life..but everything is out there to kill me
the goal was to control the population so we don't fuck and mate and reproduce...love is a crime because they ate meat rather than fish.
death and taxes and cease to exist await me. if it sounds too good to be true it always will be because I am restricted to where I go and what I can do because the person above knows this.
either way this reality does not want me to get away with anything and that fake is the new real and I am not sure if the person you are seeing is really that person or old farts or men and/or boys disguised as females...and that fake is the new real. I'll eventually end up in politics i won't have a choice...
either way this place is to hide the real world and when I do get it they'll kill me off either way or they'll frame me something i didn't do even if it's a thing of fiction...or it will be indian men disguised as females otherwise the disease women and/or diseased females whoever made this matrix did it to screw with me because of religion. I am my own worst enemy anyway...because the information is purposely hidden and the food I eat will make me mortal either way or no fucking..
either way I am my own worst enemy because other men and gay people the goal is to kill me off or if not then and they will devalue or turn me gay or kill me off and she will because she created this and she owns it or nature will...if not other men will get in the way...or the person above will
The goal was to hide the truth and prevent freewill and freedom because rightfully so and limit our free will and freedom because she owns this place - they need me for something...I did not make anything gay people did and that's why they have rigged this game..otherwise use this as target practice i was brought here because they needed me for their political ideology...otherwise eat boys.otherwise fuck my family or turn gay...like what the fuck - is this taboo subject line
besides other men will see more boobs than me because of the jews and men they got that - I won't be able to shapeshift either and they are watching and reading these notes and preventing me from getting a good night's sleep and they have purposely shoved me into a corner because they own this place and are only playing me money to keep quiet so that I push their ideology and they are
the goal is to kill me off so that I can be used part of their game otherwise get run over buhahahha and then they take my place ubhahhaa
A slave to nazis and jews who are smarter than me and hindus and muslims and big brother..
Time has no meaning here and someone is fucking with time and space on purpose...otherwise she kills and tortures each other.
The goal is simple when you can control time and space you can pretty control everything including when I die and they will kill me off buhahahahahahah
hahahahahhahahaha hahahahahhahahaha otherwise leave me all alone buhahhahahahaha
the goal of it was simple to play god with my life and limit my powers on purpose and the scientists and others won and if they conceed to me it's fufilling someone else's ideology....
A slave to friendly fascism...buhahahhaha - I won't have a choice but to join god one group controlling the other..
whether I go left or right or up or down the game is rigged A slave to the male diseease and the adult disease and the boy and gay and parents disease
they purposely injected this virus because they needed me for something the goal was to slow me down or kill me off which they will and when I am born I'll die so that I get recycled I won't have a choice or open my eyes where I won't know and feed me fake stuff appearing real.
The goal was to hide the truth because the truth would hurt and come at a shock...
it's never been to benefit me - I got tortured alright the goal was that there is money to be made in middle the goal was to kill the sex drive otherwise shove it my face so that they can publicly embarras me.
A slave to religion and/or science and they will fuck with me because they have fear buhahahaha because they have the ability to if not then my parents or society or nature will.
which wins every single time...I got turned into a mess because of my father and it's apparently my fault... I won't ever be as handsome because of my race and when I do I'll have to give up more of my privacy for the illusion and they will use this against me in the court of law.
either way I am blacklisted...if not they'll beat up girls
if not then humans will eat for dinner so that i get reunited in america and the way that they got that pretty was because they ate babies...
and this is to benefit others and I'll turn myself into a programmer - i won't have a choice.
only big sister and girls will enjoy real freedom because everyone is diseased if not the gay people
either way this matrix is rigged and that I'll kill myself eventually because of the mango which is money...and then basically become one of the stars
my mind is enslaved and the goal is that i am my own worst enemy...Only the catholics will ever be free or someone close to me or both. Either way the goal is that they'll eventually steal my hard earned money and rightfully so or otherwise destroy me
buhahahhaha nice try bro better luck next time buahahhahahahahaha
hahahaha as long as I accept this form of slavery because they know I am completely defensiveless and that the ball is in the hand of other men and women
The goal of them bringing me here was to avoid the chaos buhahahha
hahaha a slave to the environmentalist who needed me to do their dirty work otherwise pull the plug and then take me away and destroy and ruin the place.
They will drug me or I'll self destruct myself or they'll steal stuff away or they'll take away privileges and ask me to work in the mines. If not then I'll keep working because of my father so that I join their social cult.
The game is rigged whether it's in my favour or not the game is rigged this matrix is smarter than me and they want me to turn against my father in so he either turns against me or continues to look after me and keep me under containment because they needed me to contain a virus and otherwise take over and play this bullshit game of red vs blue vs black - so that the chinese and whites can continue fucking and I am left with the diseased - and I won't have a choice - they will drug me because of other men or eat me for dinner.
Or otherwise torture me so that women can steal my sperm from me...The game is rigged whether it's in my favour or not the person above is stronger than me...
A slave to the pedos who get off to raping kids because they own this place...because other men
They wil torture me because I don't have a choice which is why they turned me into a wuss - my parents know that I am powerless and the person above the same thing buhahhaha
otherwise be on the street naked giggling at me shitting because they own and rule this place because somebody is going to get a hurt real bad.
Money does not buy freedom and when it does it pays for my funeral. If not the jews and others will get in the way or nature will. The game is rigged buhahahha
hahahhahahahahahhahahahaha hahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahaha
but women and gay people and boys and our parents will get a free ride in life. The goal is to control nature and basically play god with my life and they won...I am a prisoner of my own home.
I won't have a choice but to get tortured otherwise they'll send the diseased after me if not other men will torture me or women and girls who are diseased will be sent by the orthodontics and dentists...
I am basically a prisoner otherwise dump me to take over a system so that when I am done rebuilding it it they can take over.
death and taxes and being brutually tortured and kept silent awaits me all and they won otherwise or turn me gay which I won't have a choice because of my parents who set these standards. buhahahha because of society...I got turned into a wuss so that it benefits my parents so that my father is either reborn as a female or he fucks me...
ahahahhahahahha hahahahahaha. They have a script for a beginning and an end to my life so that I can be recycled...
Freedom died a long time ago...This matrix was designed to torture me psychologically.
The goal was to silence nature and when I do wake up they can giggle at me exploding buhahahha
ahahahhaha hahahahha HEHHHEHEHE hehehheehehehehehehe. This matrix purposely lays traps in this reality to lure me into a trap of self destruction and disorganisation and slow me down so that I get sick and fat and so it funds their organisation or i am falling for a similar trap here..
Either turn gay or accept this form of slavery buhahahhaha hahahahha hehehhehehheehhehehe
Otherwise they'll really show whose boss and shut me up for good because rightfully so my parents are stronger than me.
When I become free I'll become a product or a product on their cell phone, newspaper and advertisement buhahahhah...otherwise get turned into a padlock on the internet or the font or the colors on the internet because rightfully so they own and rule this place. The goal was to devalue me and then take it away otherwise prop me up to see how much shit I can tolerate until they take it away from me...if not other men will come after me...or copy or steal my idea. They rape mother earth and mother earth is being raped too.
Otherwise shove gay porn down my throat because they want me to do something wrong but the real owners can get away with having cake and eating it too.
The goal was to delete me so that I cease to exist and they will make me mortal and they won. They experimented on me so that I am given a short self life and or otherwise they blend into the crowd so that they are reborn or I left all alone..
or when I reborn I am born with diseases and genetic defects...
women and girls run this matrix and there are no females in this matrix and if they are they are men disguised as that and they have purposely made it that way....and when I do break free I'll die whether it's here or outside this matrix so that i get recycled or cease to exist or get turned into a less useful forms of life or get raped from behind....buhahahahaha
hahahahahahha. Otherwise stare at a computer screen all day long so it protects my parents. Utopia is dystopia...otherwise get raped in jail for their own entertainment.
They will torture me buhahaha whether I like it or not. The goal was to make me mortal and they won...

WARNING - the following is a vaguely ambiguous description of one’s man take on rat people who wear full metal armour
I like to say am a fan of stormvermin “thematic armour,” does it fit the faction and the skaven well? fur? check. No pants? Check. Do they look like a rat? Check
It answers the question what happens when a ratman doesn’t die after a few battles, how does he go about protecting himself? Stormvermin seem to favour full plate, full body protection with a few oddities. Their paws aren’t protected at all, they do hide the gaps tho between the shoulders and chest with a short cape so their actively avoiding armouring their paws…
My best guess they want to keep as much dexterity for climbing and jumping? Makes sense as skaven love ambushing their enemies and maybe lack the same dexterity of a human?
Their armour is designed to be compact, letting them still fit into rat holes and move fast I.e stormvermin..
Other oddities include spikes covering their armour, especially the helmet that offer little to no advantage, if anything in melee other less armoured skaven who bump into a stormvermin will get stuck to his armour dogpiling on-top of him.
Presumably this all is about intimation, to avoid being targeted as a easy mark, to look as dangerous as possible. Don’t get me started on the 6 foot long metal back spikes with skulls on warlords or the metal lanterns. Have they seen skaven structures? Like to see a warlord try to move around without bumping into the one support holding up the whole undercity and start a chain reaction lighting the whole place on fire…
One last thing… if stormvermin want to wear full plate why don’t they protect their tail or neck? Why brother looking for gaps when all you have to do is slice their six foot tail dangling away from them and wait for them to die of blood loss or pull out a dagger and slit their throat? You would think living in a cutthroat society every day make them realise one of the easiest way to kill someone is the throat or also in their case the tail?
Ok… now about what I liked
Stormvermin are knightly looking, every skaven believes they are better then everybody else so in a medieval world knights are seen as the most prestigious, the most important and skaven love that…
Stormvermin are evidence of a centralised power in skavendom, the council of 13. They are trained killers from a young age apart of a elite fighting force responsible for protecting warlords, grey seers and their assets…To someone who knows little to nothing about the skaven it’s easy to assume a mad max world when it’s more like the hunger games with a small number of highly trained and technologically advanced skaven.
They have military ranks with higher ranking stormvermin commanding armies. A stormvermin, a stormfang, a bodyguard, a red guard are all different positions with different responsibilities and duties. A stormvermin and stormfang are actively fighting with the latter as the commander of an stormvermin regiment. Technically in vermintide we are fighting stormfangs who are said to wear spiked armour. The other ranks either are protecting important skaven or assets, or are special forces going behind enemy lines to disrupt the enemy army operations, similar to the U5.
They only enforce law and order around the areas surrounding warlords, grey seers and assets. This means checkpoints and better security for all skaven living in these areas, with the rest living in constant chaos. Usually it is left up to the stormvermin how to police so witch hunts and extortion is rifle so long as they maintain order.
They are often involved in clan politics being bride with money or rising up the ranks to backstab their warlord to become a dumb puppet of the clan grey seer. They might avoid policing certain areas to encourage uprisings and riots or have the progress on a task given to that warlord or grey seer undone to weaken their power by losing allies and alliances if they aren’t getting their demands met. Usually this is caused by another clan influence to encourage infighting making it easier to take over their nest. They are big, strong and dumb with few exceptions…
Anyway this has helped me and if you read this far thank you for listening…

What is Rock, Paper, Shotgun?
Rock, Paper, Shotgun (RPS) is a PC-gaming focused site based in the UK that was started in 2007. It has the usual gaming site content – Top 5/10/50/100 lists, publisher or developer press releases dressed up as news, reviews, previews, press event reports, a podcast, and – important to this story – a comment section below articles where gamers and capital-G Gamers, left-wing and right-wing alike, can find unity in complaining that their favourite was inappropriately placed in the aforementioned Top 5/10/50/100 lists.
(Fun fact: one of the co-founders of RPS was Kieron Gillen, who has since worked on Uncanny X-Men, Young Avengers, Marvel’s Darth Vader, and co-created Doctor Aphra.)
Of note, RPS bucks the generally apolitical nature of gaming sites by being quite openly left-wing. Though it generally isn’t a feature of many articles, it does show up on occasion, and not always in the best light. For instance, this article that has an unusual bone to pick with Rainbow Six Siege having a female hostage in the E3 demo. Despite Tom Clancy himself having a reputation as a conservative, and that’s pretty evident in his fiction, the Rainbow Six series has been unusually progressive in having women fighting terrorists alongside the men since the inception, and Siege was no exception. It was actually quite rare in the ‘90s that a woman not named Lara Croft was involved in the action alongside the boys, so it does seem like an article about Rainbow Six’s treatment of women is more about having a bone to pick.
(Editorial note: I do not believe a person’s identity is political. Some people do. There’s a saying that applies to capital-G Gamers – “There are two genders: male and political.” Often when they decry keeping politics out of video games, it’s directed at any sort of inclusion. So, the political slant on this is just to point out that left-wing people are generally pro-trans and right-wing people are generally not. Spoiler alert, this is a discussion about trans people.)
What is wargaming?
Within gaming, there are genres. Wargaming is one of them, and quite niche. Within the genre, there’s a diverse spectrum of passion. Some would consider themselves wargaming fans if they played and liked the Total War series. More hardcore wargamers would vehemently disagree and look down their nose at a game that has giant men standing on a world map; in their minds, wargaming is the domain of the chit and NATO symbology – a whole other language where a rectangular with an X through it represents an infantry unit, and the number of Xs or Is above the rectangle represents its size from XXXXX being army group, XX being division, II as battalion or I as company. (Give me hexes or give me death!) But in general, it’s operational (think the Italian campaign of WWII), strategic (the invasion of Sicily the Allies), or tactical (taking a specific town in Sicily with a regiment), and generally turn-based but occasionally real-time. You won’t find Age Of Empires in this genre, for instance.
Wargaming is not exclusive to the digital space either, and it’s just as likely to be played around an enormous table with intricate landscapes, pushing 8mm, 15mm or bigger pieces, usually hand-painted, and rolling dice. They’ll have a hefty rulebook in hand to consult how many dice you roll and what sort of success you need in order for your British mortar team to successfully knock out the German machine gun nest on the rooftop. Warhammer 40K is the most famous example, but that’s a single guy per base; the deeper wargames have a single base representing a squad or platoon stuck together to move as a group.
(The more hardcore have taken on the moniker grognards, a reference to old soldiers and specifically the original Imperial Guard that fought under Napoleon at Waterloo.)
What’s The Flare Path?
Among the contributors to RPS was one named Tim Stone, who started writing for the site as soon as it was founded. (I cannot use anonymity, so the usual sub rules apply about leaving people alone; Tim’s still writing and in order to engage with this drama, we have to link articles that clearly have his name on them.) There’s a distinction between staff and contributors; staff were full-time employees of the business, whereas contributors are just freelancers who pop in and out. He was not a run-of-the-mill writer who would guzzy up press releases, Tim only had one ongoing feature called The Flare Path with a supplemental Friday Foxer. Though he started out doing little comics under the title Strafe Left, he moved on to reviews and features before creating the regular feature The Flare Path in 2011.
The title The Flare Path is a reference to the lights that outline runways, allowing aircraft to take off or land at night. And that is a pretty good summation of the feature, because Tim’s focus was exclusively on wargaming and simulations, which could mean directing squadrons of aircraft to take off for a mission, or yourself piloting a plane to a gentle landing guided by the flare path. Every Friday, you would just as likely find an article about a game where you drive a train in rural England as you would a wargame where you command Roman legions in that very same countryside. Among the regular features were A2Z articles, where Tim would have short snippets for each letter of the alphabet, with Q often necessarily “Quick tea break” due to the infrequency of that letter showing up. For instance, a new ARMA game might be A, then teasing a review of Battle Brothers is B, and so on, just a fun way to wrap up a lot of short bits of news that don’t have enough meat for a full article.
Another article type would see Tim break out of his usual Friday containment and run communal games, typically Combat Mission. Combat Mission is a WWII/Cold War turn-based tactics game where you’d queue up orders to your units that would then be executed for 60 seconds, during which the other side would be executing their own orders and you’d simply have to watch how your planning and preparation plays out. And it turns out, this is surprisingly adaptable to a group game – Tim would grid the map, lay out a scenario, identify the units and the objectives, and then people would comment below the article to give instructions. You could only move one unit in a turn and you had to be the first to claim that unit, but you’d say, for example, “I’d like to move 1st Squad to H3 and try to suppress the machine gun,” and Tim would take your comment and play it out. The next day, he’d do a little narrative report on who did what, where, and when, and what the enemy did in response, in a fun narrative way, even naming characters who pulled off particularly heroic or cowardly feats. Then he’d update the map, and the next turn begins.
Alongside his regular article, he’d also post a Friday Foxer. He’d have a variety of different games in the Foxer genre, and often rewarded correct answers with prizes – usually codes for games that developers gave him. One type was giving clues to a location and the readers would have to deduce where Tim was “standing” that fit all the criteria. Others were Catchphrase-like messages hidden in images that you’d need to decode, or a series of seemingly-unrelated images which had a theme that you’d need to identify.
I go on these tangents to emphasize that Tim had built himself a little community on RPS. While contributors did reply to reader comments in articles, Tim was often playing a game with readers, which endeared him to some people. Not only that, if you were interested in wargaming or simulations, any article on RPS about those genres was typically Tim’s domain. For a certain group, Tim was the only regular source of news on two niche genres, and the only reason to read RPS if the newest action game or looter-shooter didn’t appeal to you. There was and (spoilers) is nothing like The Flare Path and the Foxers on RPS, as far as actual engagement with the article itself through community wargames or puzzles.
Equally important, wargaming itself is niche enough that there are few others who do what Tim does. Wargaming.net is actually the name of the company who makes World Of Tanks, World Of Warships and others – ironically, none of which would qualify as wargames and would barely pass musters as simulations either. Wargamer has infrequent articles. The best podcast on the subject is Three Moves Ahead (which originally launched as the podcast for the now-defunct Flash Of Steel website), but the podcast is infrequent as well, is primarily focused on a single game per episode (though with comparisons made by the host or guests to other games), and has a bit too much focus on Total War or every single new Paradox DLC for Crusader Kings at the exclusion of more niche titles.
On a weekly schedule, Tim became a stable pair of hands, and was directing his community to support all sorts of up-and-comers who were otherwise ignored or neglected or just invisible to wider gaming press.
I also want to point out that there’s an often-unspoken ethical question at the core of wargaming as a hobby. To his credit, Tim often wrote about it, and would even avoid wargaming topics as a matter of sensitivity to significant dates. As players in this hobby, we are moving chits around that represent thousands of people and though nobody obviously dies, wargaming frequently deals with historical events and it’s something we need to be aware of. Tim would frequently muse in his articles or bring it up in interviews with developers – to paraphrase, what we’re doing for “fun” is essentially turning some very dark times in human history into entertainment, and to what extent should we be aware of that? Should we want to simulate “playing” as Germany to conquer Europe, which in the real world resulted in tens of millions of innocent and not-so-innocent people dying? It’s a tough conversation to have and Tim chose to engage with it, which probably put him offside with some of his readers, because it’s a topic that actually genuinely is bringing politics into gaming, unlike a lot of the gaming discourse.
A journalist is booted off a fictional radio for being a bit TERFy, resulting in a journalist being booted off a website for being a bit TERFy.
The inciting incident for this drama is an article posted in 2020 about a UK journalist who was one of several used by game developer Ubisoft to provide voiceovers for the video game Watch Dogs Legion. In the article, it is revealed that this journalist had in the past posted a 2017 The Times article titled “A man can’t just say he has turned into a woman.”
What is TERF? Trans-Exclusionary Radical Feminist, which probably spiked the Google charts more recently with The Author Who Shall Not Be Named. I will add this disclaimer, I am inferring things about Tim when I call him a TERF, and maybe I’m giving too much credit. I don’t know if Tim Stone is a feminist, so I’m giving the benefit of the doubt, and I wear that. The author of The Times article is a self-proclaimed feminist, and does claim to support trans right, but according to the RPS article, “(She) uses familiar hand-wringing about biological sex, transgender identification as a trend, and people with penises in women's changing rooms.” I’ll leave it up to your judgement whether you think either is an actual TERF or not.
In an unusual move, one Tim Stone showed up in the comments of the above article, and that’s the meat of this drama.
The Alamo but with TERFs.
The comments, as you can imagine, were completely chill since obviously “censoring” a “journalist” in a “video game” for “anti-trans views” outside of the game itself is just the perfect intersection of everything political on an internet forum possible. (The voiceover in the game was scripted by Ubisoft and was itself not an issue; they were choosing to remove the voiceover to remove association with the journalist based on their views.)
One user wrote:

there are diverse voices within RPS when it comes to games, genres, preferences etc but I would say (and i’d be prepared to be challenged on this) there is zero diversity in respect of political views and arguable groupthink and alignment particularly around trans issues.

To which Tim opined:

There's at least one regular RPS contributor who'd like to see the site show a little more respect for the gender critical position in the trans rights debate. Me.

He proceeded to link several articles, saying,

I agree with all those arguing for more constructive discussion and less name-calling in this debate.

And we’re off to the races.
One commenter wrote:

never mind 'gender critical' being an obvious dogwhistle, it boggles the mind that you think "trans rights debate" is an acceptable string of words in 2020
trans rights are human rights, this shit isn't a debate

And significantly, it wasn’t just site users who were chiming in. Another writer for RPS came in guns blazing:

The "gender critical position" is tired snivelling cowardice hiding behind Very Real Concerns while throwing shit at the people whose lives are routinely treated like an intellectual excercise. [sic]
I am frankly embarrassed [sic] to see you repeating such dogwhistling bullshit. The obviously lying "I am cancelling my subscription!!!" oafs in here are one thing, but this is just sad.

What the writer was alluding to was the typical capital-G Gamer response to anything political (and often something is only “political” if they don’t like it), namely “Get your politics out of my video games.” Often the corollary of that was “..or I’m getting out of your website.”
The inciting article is itself tame. Incredibly tame. As referenced earlier, it has the usual games journalism scent of just dressing up a press release. At the most judgemental, they referenced that the voiceover-providing journalist had “some pretty ugly opinions about transgender people” and “that’s decidedly not neat,” which is just the lovely understatement you get from British people. “This is a bit bothersome” was, I believe, repeatedly uttered during the Blitz.
I won’t bore with copying over more comments, but it gets quite heated – although Tim seems to remain quite collected in the comments, which does have an air that he isn’t aware of what kind of hornet’s nest he’s kicked. The most noteworthy exchange is between a user and Tim, where the user writes:

It is distressing that you think my rights as a trans person are subject to some sort of "trans rights debate," and that "gender critical" is anything but a dog whistle for the same transphobic rhetoric as I've always been subject to, but now behind a veneer of intellectualism and civil discourse.
This isn't a matter of left and right, it's a matter of respect for other human beings. Good to know at least one RPS writer has none for me.

And Tim’s response:

I have profound respect for you and your life choices.
I also believe that questions like "Should trans women be allowed to compete in female sports?" and "Should male-bodied trans women be housed in womens' prisons?" are worthy of debate.
To forbid all debate on "trans rights" and to seek to silence and cancel people who don't unquestioningly support one side of the argument seems horribly totalitarian to me.

If you were to take an unfriendly view of Tim, this might be it – calling a person’s transition a “life choice”, and then putting the question of trans rights up for debate, calling the desire not to debate someone’s human rights “totalitarian.”
In all, Tim would comment eight times, with his last being:

Some proposed trans rights clash with women's rights in certain areas. It is not bigoted to point this out or advocate debate so that compromises can be reached.

Overrunning the drop zone.
Five days later, the RPS Twitter account posts this tweet.

Trans rights are human rights. We strive to create an inclusive space for all people. Earlier this week, a freelancer used the RPS comments section to express views that failed in that goal. We will no longer be working with this freelancer or publishing their column.

And just like that, the flares are snuffed and Tim’s time at RPS comes to an abrupt end after 13 years of service.
The responses, I’m sure you can imagine, are the usual volleys from the usual battle lines. Left-wing and trans rights people are chuffed to bits, believing that an insidious TERF has been weeded out from RPS. They view his comments about bathrooms and sports as the usual dogwhistle, typical of the alt-right where the goal is to draw increasingly smaller circles to exclude trans people from one thing after another until they ultimately cannot exist in society. Gamers with a right-wing focus and wargamers (and those are not mutually exclusive) try to cancel culture RPS, many declaring that they’d never return to the site for this grave injustice. And for wargamers, that’s pretty easy; Tim was the only one catering to their genre appetite, and there literally was no reason to return without Tim. The most vanilla response was those who didn’t care about the comment section conflict at all and just wanted their dang wargaming news.
(The wargaming audience was not exclusively on the right-wing - the creator of one of the biggest wargaming podcasts showed up in the comments too, and took a distinctly anti-Tim and pro-trans stance.)
The last (spoilers, not really) article posted by Tim was a typical A2Z column, and became somewhat of a shrine to him. Of note, the very user to whom Tim gave his perhaps most damning response showed up:

Please don't assume Tim is a TERF. I was involved, and indeed in lots of was responsible for what happened on the other forum which i am devastated by.
I am trans and Tim replied in support of a view that i expressed! He shared some views and links to articles (including one from a trans blogger) that many people (including many trans people) would agree with. And even if they didn't, and Alison below articulates the position better than i could, its not like he went on an alt right tirade. This is a reasonable person making reasonable views very politely and and commenter whether they agreed with those or not has gained nothing from what happened subsequently, and we have all collectively lost something.

Flare Path fans were somewhat split. The most mild responses were critical of RPS for how they booted Tim out the door without a second chance; some were concerned that it’s not a great way to win allies and convince people. Throw in the usual snippets: “cancel culture” and references to “The Inquisition”, and a number of people saying their farewells to RPS. In an odd way – and I did it myself by calling this a shrine – the comment section really does feel like the man died, with some outright coming to, quote, “pay their respects”.
Of particular note, a user named hms_pepperpot shows up, and it looks like it’s Tim. I have no evidence to the contrary and the phrasing is close enough that I’m willing to believe it. But wait, Tim was posting as Tim Stone in the inflamed comment section, right? Yep, the divorce was so swift and decisive that they even blocked his access to his old username, or deleted it entirely – either way, he was in the comments to say goodbye under an alias.

Leaving RPS without being able to say a proper goodbye to you, the readers who have made my job such a joy this past thirteen years, has been one of the most depressing aspects of the last few days. Your enthusiasm was as important to The Flare Path's modest success as the complete creative freedom Graham afforded me. Thank you for making possible the happiest years of my working life.
While the Flare Path name is destined for the scrap heap, the concept and spirit of the column will hopefully live on. I'm planning to pick up pretty much where I left off early in the new year. An article devoted to the FP game jam entries will be amongst the first pieces I post. Of course, there will be foxers too.
To readers hurt by my words last weekend, all I can say is a heartfelt sorry - I didn't set out to wound and have no wish whatsoever to make the lives of trans people more difficult. To readers baffled by the comments that ended up costing me my job, I strongly recommend reading a thoughtful essay written by Sam Smethers, the CEO of respected British women's rights charity The Fawcett Society. Google 'Sex and Gender Indentity: Finding a Way Forward' and you should find it.
See you in 2021 I hope. Tim.

Of note, HMS Pepperpot is a reference to warship HMS Penelope. With Tim’s penchant for riddles and puzzles, it is not likely a coincidence that:

On wartime service with Force K, she was holed so many times by bomb fragments that she acquired the nickname "HMS Pepperpot".

Though Tim had some in agreement with his views in the inciting comment section, he was undoubtedly outnumbered and taking a lot of flak.
Napoleon’s exile on Elba.
Some time later, Tim would resurface on a new site of his own creation, Tally-Ho Corner. Very much The Flare Path with a new coat of paint, he would carry on with his regular columns on a weekly basis. The Foxers returned, as did A2Z and communal wargaming. RPS, for their part, did not seem to fight to keep the column to themselves. There was a small exodus as RPS had once been a PC gaming site with a wargaming/simulation column, to just a PC gaming site. Those with only an interest in those genres left; there was nothing for them anymore. An unknown number followed Tim to his new endeavour and made themselves known over there. Striking out on his own has costs, however, and Tim sells membership and banner space to those who wish to help out. He has made follow-up requests since Tally-Ho Corner started which would indicate that it isn’t a profitable venture; he says he only wants enough to support the site, and seems to be happy to continue for the love of the hobby. He has alluded to the site not breaking even, so you can infer from that what you want about the size of the Flare Path exodus. Like I said, it’s a very niche hobby, so even 100% of Flare Path readers might not constitute a large number. One of the posts with the most engagements is a community vote on the best PC wargames; two years old, it has 144 comments and a closed comment section, so you could probably extrapolate a rough guess on readers versus commenters to see how popular the site is.
Tim would make the occasional comment about his past misadventure, but generally seemed to just carry on. Others would fight for or against him in other corners of the internet, but publicly, Tim seemed done with the whole thing and happy to just get back to writing about games.
The most blatant reference was an A2Z at the start of this year. No longer than any other entry (remember, he’s filling out 26 entries in a week, they’re usually just snippets), the entry “P is for Pointless provocation” in its entirety:

If, after my bruising departure from RPS in 2020, I had decided to start work on a “cathartic” retro FPS about gunning down dogmatic ‘trans allies’, I hope someone – a friend, colleague, or family member – would have taken me to one side and said “Tim, WTF are you doing?”. Unfortunately, no-one seems to have urged Norwegian coder Sandra Moen to think again. If they had perhaps the nasty Terfenstein 3D wouldn’t have made it onto Steam.

Tim’s back, baby! But it’s not him! But it is!
In a strange, quite dickish move, an RPS writer recycled an old Flare Path to come up with “The 25 best simulation games on PC”, with the writer credited… even though it was copied from Tim’s 2015 article. Tim called it out in an A2Z, as “H is for Hire a new sim correspondent, you cheapskates”, and that really sums it up – they were not rewriting the list, rearranging it, or updating it, they were literally copying the original list over and slapping a new author’s name on it.
If you click the above link, you’ll see that the article now has Tim as the author, changed retroactively (again). That in itself added a new element of drama, as readers who showed up after the edit were surprised by a new article from Mr Flare Path himself. Though it says “updated” in 2022, the giveaway is that the comments are predominantly from 7 years ago, when it was originally posted. One commenter, who I’ll take at their word, seemed to be witnessing the Stalin-esque rewriting of history in real time:

Wow, I just saw that Tim Stone's name has been removed. He was there as author when I first saw it this morning, with a note about it being updated by someone else. Now his name has been fully removed as the original author. I don't know what to say, but it feels icky to rewrite history like that, very 1984.
Update - now it says article by Holly, Additional Contributions by Tim Stone. Still not accurate (seems to be the reverse or reality) but at least the original author's name is in there somewhere again.

(Not calling anyone over there a tyrant or communist or anything, merely referencing that infamous photo where people are removed one by one as they fall afoul of the Stalin regime. In this instance, taking Tim’s work and crediting to someone else, then crediting Tim in addition to the new writer, then finally just calling it a Tim article.)
People noticed that the “updated” tag was the last attempt to hide in plain sight, since there was nothing updated about the list. It was identical to the one posted by Tim in 2015. And the clue was that, according to RPS, no simulation game had managed to crack the list since 2015; the “youngest” game on the list was 7 years old (now 8), a title shared by Farming Simulator 15 and Train Simulator 15.
15, of course, being the year both games released and the year Tim wrote the list.
An odd move to dig up the bones of the past, both the article and Tim’s involvement with RPS, for a single cheap parlour trick. Needless to say, if you search for Tim Stone contributions on RPS now, his “shrine” – a pretty typical A2Z Flare Path – is not his most recent contribution to the site. Instead, it’s “The 25 best simulation games on PC” from 8 years ago.
Fittingly, in the comment section below, the most recent post is by someone seemingly oblivious to the drama surrounding Tim Stone, RPS and trans rights. They’re instead complaining that two other motor racing games were left off the list. And really, there’s probably no better tribute to the community.

Hey everyone!
I'm not sure if this is the right subreddit for this but I wanted some advice on a situation with a friend.
So background context:
I (18F) am entering university this September, and am feeling pretty conflicted about my relationship with my best friend (18F) and I don't know how to handle it. Initially, I assumed she would be going to another university, so we could just drift apart and I could maintain a casual relationship with her. However, it appears to be that we'll be going to the same university, for the same program. This program only has about 200 students, so likely our classes will be the same, and so will our social circle. Currently, we're in a program with 60 students for high school and taking all the same courses and classes. Many of our clubs and ecs also overlap. So I basically am with her all day, everyday at the moment.
The issue: Before this friend, I used to be super social and had a lot of friends. Previously, I would hang out with a bunch of different groups, and if I ever felt like the conversation was boring or making me uncomfortable I would walk off from the conversation and wander to another group (essentially I was a floater). Typically, groups wouldn't be bothered by me walking off. Within the past few years, I have become more introverted. Thus, I'm more comfortable taking time away to be alone. However, while I now know being around people drains me and makes me feel tired, I do still enjoy it quite a lot. While I have become more introverted over the past few years. However, this friend is a lot more clingy. At the start of our friendship, when I would try to float off, she would trail me essentially, not letting me leave. Since she didn't really know most of the other friends on the same level, it made it difficult for me to go hang out with these other friends on my own (during the pandemic, so the only social interactions are for a half hour at lunch or the end of the day). I remember vividly once, I tried to walk off, and she latched onto the hook thing on my backpack so she wouldn't lose me in the crowd. I started to slowly feel trapped from this point forward. Even if I wanted to wander off just to be alone and go study, it became really difficult because she stuck so close to me. If I wanted to go to a club meeting, or anything, I more or less had to inform her. It feels like getting permission most of the time, and even then she tends to tag along. I understand that her intentions aren't bad, but I really just want to be left alone. I'm quite accustomed to my floating, and it gave me a sense of control.
Additionally, I had a massive fallout with my previous friend-group. It was a while back in 2017, however, it's taken me a long time to recover from that. Floating allowed me to maintain relationships without rushing into anything when I hadn't healed from my previous friend-group. I feel like her clinging on…I ended up in a friendship that I wasn't emotionally ready for, nor healed enough to handle.
Eventually, because she didn't want to hang out with other people - she's quite antisocial in nature - I would feel pressured to hang out with only her. Our high school cohort is about 60 students, so eventually people started to associate the two of us as a pair and would make remarks if I didn't hang out with her which furthered my isolation. Even when we do have moments with other groups, if she feels bored, or that they're wasting her time, I can almost feel the upsetness radiating off of her. I don't mind that they're wasting time and doing things slowly, it's a fun experience. Or at least it used to be…now all I feel is the wave of upsetness which keeps me from enjoying the whole thing. I feel like I have to leave because she wants to leave and that's the only way to appease her.
Additionally, she's very pessimistic/ cynical and egoistic. She often looks down on others and believes she is the best at everything. While I agree that she is very competent and capable, the way she expresses this makes me feel uncomfortable. She expresses it quite directly with me, however, I think other people can tell she feels that way based on the way she acts as well. As a result, people I used to be super close with have grown distant from me because it's clear she looks down on them. (Once again, I'm sure that other factors such as not talking to them as much as mentioned above contributes too, but her influence is on a level I can't control. This makes me spiral because I feel like I have no control over everything and I can't hold onto anything). I feel like I can't call her out because she'd refuse to accept it and I'd have to persuade her why she's wrong, rather than just having her accept it. I strugle to remember exact incidents unless I document it like this, and often just have the general idea of what's wrong.
Also comments like "You're being mean, or you've hurt their feelings" are often met with "So what? I don't care", the issue is I care. I don't like hurting people, and would rather try to fix things if I've made mistakes. I also don't like what that says about her. One day - such as the day I bring this up - if our friendship is over, will that be her response too? She won't try to be a good friend or good person, but will kinda go fuck all of it and hurt me without an ounce of remorse. I try to tell myself that different people have different perspectives, and I am not always right. However, no matter how hard I try, I just…I can't understand this at all, and it infuriates me.
Contrarily to her pessimism - as my mother is quite a pessimistic person - I have spent years working on maintaining my optimism, and trying really hard to be a good person. Obviously, she is not to blame for my mother's behavior. However, between the two of them, and because I'm around her all the time, I feel like I'm becoming more similar to her in this sense, and I hate myself for it. Of course, she's allowed to be cynical. I'm not saying being optimistic is always the right thing. There are many pitfalls, such as being naive, and getting hurt. Thus, I understand that being optimistic to the extent that I like to be, isn't for everyone. However, I hate how it's affecting me, and that it's around me all the time. I do appreciate our friendship, but I think this is one of our core differences that makes us incompatible
While I'm not soft-spoken, and will stand up for what I believe in, I try to avoid unnecessary conflict, and prefer to take a people-friendly approach. My friend is much more aggressive and often "rocks the boat" in group projects and friendships. This leaves me in a situation where I feel like I have to pick up the pieces to make amends because my own friendships are at risk. Additionally, even if I do agree with her point, I find it more difficult to solve problems (especially project wise) in the typical manner that I would. I can be more willing to find a compromise and handle it with less of a mess. It also makes me very, very anxious, and I hate it so much. We talked about it once and she said she knows it makes me anxious too, which makes it worse because she's still not willing to change, similar to the point about hurting others feelings. Another ex-bestfriend (18M) previously mentioned that it's technically not my responsibility, but I feel like people view her actions and feelings about things as similar to my own, which screws over my relationships.
Furthermore, she burned the bridge between her and the previously mentioned other best friend (18M), and tried to blame it on her not liking how he treated her. This also upset me, because I didn't ask for that. I also felt like because she had so much input on why my friendship with him was lacking, my pre-existing insecurities amplified. I realized wayy too late as to how unfair I had been. We had pre-existing expectations in our friendship for a number of years, and I suddenly went that's not enough. Our friendship was different and didn't tick every box, but that doesn't mean it was wrong? We both were happy, and that's what mattered. I realized at this point that I couldn't express that to her. Getting her to back off was difficult, and I started to feel scared of her to some extent. I was scared to talk to her (which surprised him, as it was atypical of me to be like this in any situation). Looking back, this was another clear red flag. Just the idea that I felt the need to shut myself down and not express myself is worrisome. (This male friend and I no longer speak for a number of reasons).
She's also known for crossing over boundaries, which caused one of my core friend groups to stop talking to her last year (and as a result of this and my ex-best friend (M18) being in this grp, I've also grown severely distant). While I can't blame the distance completely on her, I would have done my best to maintain one specific friend (F18) in the group if it hadn't been for other conflict she had with this friend. This event also caused me to realize how differently we often approach issues. She was quick to push the blame off herself. Typically, I tend to pull as much of the blame on myself as possible (also not healthy, I know M18 told me so), or if I do feel defensive. I try to apologize in the moment, sincerely. And I tend to reflect back often. I know that within the next few months, the heat of feeling accused will die down, and I'll be able to truly feel remorse from my actions and learn from them.
However, this crossing over of normal boundaries is also applicable to me. Often, we have to do what she wants if she's decided she wants to do something, regardless of what I want. While this is never directly stated, I always feel anxious to go against her and express that I'd like something else. Typically, I'm not like that with other people. The only way for me to disagree and say I'd like to do something else is to get on her level of pushy / aggressive, which I also find to be mean. I don't want to act like that. I also find it quite suffocating to express what I want because she's so pushy about what she wants.
This is further exacerbated by her parents. Her father in particular is very similarly pushy and has no regard for my boundaries. Last year when we went on a trip with both families to the Aquarium, they both made decisions about what we would be doing without me. My mom's quite sick and one of the activities (a visit to the beach) would cause her symptoms to appear. I tend to do most of the planning in our house and often have to be careful to take into account my family members' conditions in this sense. However, this impromptu decision to visit the beach got me in quite a bit of trouble with my parents, as they felt I wasn't being considerate of them. This made me feel really frustrated and trapped between everything. Additionally, my friend knows of my mom's condition. While I don't expect her to take that into account when making the decision, she should have informed me or had her dad inform my parents, and allowed for a conjoint decision. I also just didn't want to go to the beach - I was really tired at this point - but obviously (brown kid) I can't say that in front of her parents and argue.
Similar things happen for other decisions such as when we go out for other activities as well. Such as when we first became friends, often she and our other friend would want to go on walks outside (whereas I would much rather do anything else). I remember early on expressing that I didn't want to but they could go. Likely because my boundaries were ignored then and overstepped, I don't feel safe expressing that I don't want to do what she wants. And I know she won't take no for an answer through those experiences. So naturally, instead of going back and forth in an argument so I can not do what I don't like, I just am left to silently resign.
Additionally, we're both pre-med students, which creates a lot of competition. I do my best to find many extracurricular opportunities and scholarship opportunities (especially since I'm a first-generation student and my parents are unable to support me in ways that are not financial support due to various reasons). About a year after we first became friends - we've been friends for 3 years, since grade 10 - she and another girl who we were close with at the time, reached out to form a club behind my back. I know this probably sounds very foolish, but up till this point, I had shared the majority of extracurricular activities I had researched online. Additionally, I had founded a club a few months prior with both girls (we were all co-presidents), since they expressed interest after I had founded another club with another friend group. They had no intention to tell me that they were starting this new initiative. I had reached out to the organization to inquiry about stating a chapter for the three of us together and found out about it. It really bothered me and made me feel like I was being taken advantage of. When I expressed this at first, both girls shut down and got defensive. Neither was willing to admit they were wrong, and just tried to fight me. I am their friend? I was rightfully upset, shouldn't you at least apologize and show some remorse?
It should be noted that some months later, I expressed just how upset I was to the best that I could to both girls and we talked about it and came to an understanding. While the issue was resolved, I still think it's important context.
Now once again, this competition is further exacerbated by her dad once again. This year, I had compiled a database of scholarships. During a conversation, her dad had mentioned that we needed to be on top of things this year, such as scholarships. It had rubbed me the wrong way, so I had stood up for myself and mentioned we had a database of scholarships as a way to prove I was on top of things (I get told by my parents that I should work harder a lot, and it makes me upset because I'm really working my ass off). However, this prompted him at first to push my friend to show him this database and scholarship information. And as a result she became really pushy with me. Initially, I ignored her hoping it would go away. After all, I had saved her imo by telling him she was prepared which was a lie. She could have compiled something in the meantime to make up for it instead of bothering me about it so many times. She made me feel like I had to give it to her, that she was entitled to it. About a month in from this, he called me while I was at home, and spoke to me in...I don't even know how to describe it, but it was a pretty manipulative tone to get me to hand it over. I ended up handing over a couple of simpler ones I had (because I had spent hours researching those scholarships, and the information is also available to her on the internet, it just wasn't fair).
Plus, after the prior issue with the club, I assumed there wouldn't be anything like this. Exchanging homework was alright because it was quite evenly balanced, and often it was balanced our quite quickly due to the nature of school. However, this wasn't something she could pay me back for, and left me feeling used again. I know I was quite nice back then and helped people out a lot, but I hate being taken advantage of and treated like that. I also feel like it's just a shitty show of the other person's character.
I know that in this case, she knows her dad is in the wrong and tried to stand up for me at the start. I actually would probably just avoid him in a normal situation and not make a big deal of this.
However, I feel quite unhappy now, and as a commenter said, looking forwards 10 years I don't think the friendship in this state will be good for me. While I have thought of talking to her, as you can see above, either I have mentioned some of these things in some capacity and been dismissed, or the issue is who she is as a person. I sincerely believe that I have no right to dictate who she is as a person. But these core things disrupt my life and make things really difficult for me, so I'm not sure if I should keep putting up with them. I keep rationalizing to myself with "no one's perfect", "she's not completely at fault, I am top" and " I've also probably made mistakes and hurt her, I shouldn't make a fuss". However, as the commenter said if I'm unhappy then that's that. Forcing myself to continue feeling suffocated and unhappy because I feel guilty is just foolish.
Why am I still friends with her?
Well, while I am very isolated with no friends to hang out with, this connection feels more real? A lot of my old connections, I would wander around those groups, and no one would notice if I left. Sometimes, it made me feel really lonely like no one cared for me. They all felt like surface-level friendships. This often made it super easy to walk away when things got toxic (which I can't do right now), however, I often felt depressed and unfilled then. Whereas my friendship with her feels more genuine and deeper.
Additionally, we are quite similar in terms of SES and goals. It's quite easy to discuss familial issues with her when I need support, and from a financial standpoint, I don't feel pressured to spend with her either. Sometimes this can be stressful since she's more stingy than me, so I feel guilty for spending too (and therefore, going out with other friends and spending). We have also argued before on finances, and i sometimes can't understand why she's making such a big deal about things. I feel held back from spending as I please. However, unlike many other people; I never feel bad about saving. Using coupons, or points, or carefully checking multiple prices. We do that stuff together, so I don't feel bad doing it.
Our sisters have also really hit off, and it's a nice dynamic between the four of us and I don't know how they'll be affected or our families will react in general.
Being in a similar field means she understands not having the time to hang out (especially while we did IB). This expectation go hang-out more from my middle-school friends stressed me out a lot.
What I think is the best solution:
I'd love to remain friends and just have a crap ton of distance between us. The type of friendship where you see each other only on holidays (like once every 4 months?). That way we can quickly catch-up, and can be there for each other if needed, but I can go ahead and live my own life. Plus, I can find myself again and be the person I like.
I guess part of my worry with this is also clubs. We have many similar interests, and I want to join schools clubs without feeling tied down or running back into her. Often when I'm in environments with her around, I feel like I have to let her lead and I can't just be me and do me. I have to back off and step down or else she gets pushy. I tend to thrive more when I'm on my own without her whether that's working with a group or just leading in general. Even working with a group, while I've definitely gotten frustrated with them, we sort things out quite well because I'm handling situations with them my way. I want that back in every club in my life. But even now, pre-uni starting we've somehow managed to join the same pre-med club. And I feel like either we'll keep joining the same clubs or I have to back off and stop doing what I want to do cuz she's doing them to be able to unclip my wings and be free.
However, with us going to the same universities (in a city 2.5 hours from where we live now), I don't know how to get around all this. I also don't know how to tell her most of this without hurting her feelings. And even if I did, as I mentioned prior, the core of the issue is who she is as a person and how she carries herself. Just because I like being optimistic and nice doesn't mean I can force her to be that way. She's allowed to have her defense mechanisms, and we've discussed before how she believes her way of living is better than mine for her. (Her's being the pessimistic, and as she calls it "realistic" way, whereas mine is a lot more optimistic, sometimes naive, but imo it's simpler?). And no one has any right to say what is the right way to live for everyone? So that feels wrong...
I just want a casual relationship. I don't want to make an enemy out of her as I enter university because I have even less energy for that then the bs I'm dealing with rn. I just want us to be like friends, not best friends. And keep a lot of distance when we first go in. I feel like a huge part of the issue here is we passed the point in the friendship cycle where your supposed to drift off. Usually having that time away I feel like allows for a natural drift back in as you accidentally cross paths again. And I sorta want to just drift back now and naturally drift back to being friends later when / if it works out.
I guess the question is how do I explain all of this to her and reach a resolution without making an enemy out of her

What is your bedtime routine? What should a bedtime routine look like at this age.
When does "sleeptime" become "bedtime"? Or, at what age should we be putting our LO in bed, and saying goodnight, and leaving so she can put herself to sleep?
Our LO is 17mo. We've never done "sleep training" in a formal way. Up until about 15mo, we rocked her to sleep on our lap, but now she's just too tall to be comfortable sleeping there. Since then, we cuddle while listening to lullabies or an audio storybook for a bit, until she agrees she's "ready for crib." Then we lay her in crib and wait for her to fall asleep. Historically we've just sat nearby listening to lullabies, but recently she requires we also lay down on the floor nearby and "sleep." This hurts our backs, we are too old for floors, stuffed animals do not make great pillows. I personally often actually fall asleep and wake up an hour later feeling extra stiff and terrible.
She can and does put herself to sleep. If fall asleep before she does, she still falls asleep on her own. She will occasionally put herself to sleep on the playroom floor for a nap rather than ask for nap/sleep in crib.
Recently though she's pushing more boundaries. If she isn't ready to sleep right away, she riles herself and the bedtime parent up by throwing pacifiers behind the crib (mockingly "oh nooo!"), begging for different songs/stories only to tell us "no" wrong song/story, trying to get us to take her out for a diaper change, throwing toys/blankets out at us, trying to pull them in so she can throw them again, etc. She'll do this for 1hr plus increasingly desperately, until she's practically fall down sleepy, and then go completely critical with a meltdown. Tonight she just tried saying every word she knows how to say in attempt to get me to engage herespond/pick her up, had a meltdown and cried herself to sleep in my husband's arms.
Are we just being too present in the space, too forgiving/inconsistent in some way by not always playing the same songs/stories in the same order, etc...? Should we still be staying at the bedside or should we be leaving the room? Or...? I must be missing something.
What is appropriate for this age?

27F, USA TW: potential sexual abuse?
I was in an abusive relationship for 5+ years
I did get out. I do still struggle, every single day.
I have very limited memories from the relationship. Of course I do have memories, I just know that the time we spent/plus living together most of the relationship compared to the amount of memories I have, I should remember an insane amount more. Maybe it’s good I don’t though.
About 2 years ago I had a memory(s) pop up. I had forgotten for a while but I started to remember all the times I’d wake up to my ex boyfriend with his hands down my pants. It wasn’t really “sexual” by nature but since my genitalia is involved im just confused.
I would wake up to the most tense and “scary” energy with his hands down my pants feeling me to confirm whether I was “wet” or not because if I was, I was cheating on him in my dreams to which a huge fight would break out and he’d end up getting physical with me (grabbing my face really hard or pulling my hair). If I started to doze off and I would twitch (most people do twitch when they start to drift away) that also meant I was cheating in my dreams and usually was the catalyst to his hands down my pants. Also having a vagina I’m technically always a bit “wet” down there as that’s the healthy environment for a vagina……
Was that a type of sexual abuse? I’m confused
There is another time. He would always want six in the morning before work and there was a time in particular I remember that I woke up with him (he wanted me to set his clothes out and pack lunch etc which was fine) but this morning he wanted sex and I was so tired I didn’t want to. He started acting insane accusing me of cheating then it turned into him threatening to cheat and everything just got so crazy I finally gave in. I was crying in the pillow the whole time and then (this is going to sound funny/weird) but he was thrusting from behind and I got enraged after a while and started violently throwing it back in a way like “here asshole this is what you wanted!!!” and once I did that he finally got all pissed off stopped and walked out.
Is that sexual coercion?
The reason I’m asking is because I’m confused. Idk how to heal bc idk what this is.
Sorry and thank you if you’ve read this long!!

Sorry if it's a little confusing

27F, USA TW: potential sexual abuse?
I was in an abusive relationship for 5+ years
I did get out. I do still struggle, every single day.
I have very limited memories from the relationship. Of course I do have memories, I just know that the time we spent/plus living together most of the relationship compared to the amount of memories I have, I should remember an insane amount more. Maybe it’s good I don’t though.
About 2 years ago I had a memory(s) pop up. I had forgotten for a while but I started to remember all the times I’d wake up to my ex boyfriend with his hands down my pants. It wasn’t really “sexual” by nature but since my genitalia is involved im just confused.
I would wake up to the most tense and “scary” energy with his hands down my pants feeling me to confirm whether I was “wet” or not because if I was, I was cheating on him in my dreams to which a huge fight would break out and he’d end up getting physical with me (grabbing my face really hard or pulling my hair). If I started to doze off and I would twitch (most people do twitch when they start to drift away) that also meant I was cheating in my dreams and usually was the catalyst to his hands down my pants. Also having a vagina I’m technically always a bit “wet” down there as that’s the healthy environment for a vagina……
Was that a type of sexual abuse? I’m confused
There is another time. He would always want six in the morning before work and there was a time in particular I remember that I woke up with him (he wanted me to set his clothes out and pack lunch etc which was fine) but this morning he wanted sex and I was so tired I didn’t want to. He started acting insane accusing me of cheating then it turned into him threatening to cheat and everything just got so crazy I finally gave in. I was crying in the pillow the whole time and then (this is going to sound funny/weird) but he was thrusting from behind and I got enraged after a while and started violently throwing it back in a way like “here asshole this is what you wanted!!!” and once I did that he finally got all pissed off stopped and walked out.
Is that sexual coercion?
The reason I’m asking is because I’m confused. Idk how to heal bc idk what this is.
Sorry and thank you if you’ve read this long!!

I'm in the first draft stage and am having some difficulty getting some beta readers so I'm hoping for some input on just the first chapter. I know there's a lot of editing I'm gonna have to do so be as brutal as you can/ want, just as long as it's helpful criticism towards developing my writing style.
Alice Eye
Chapter One- Alone In The Rain
"Don't get in the way of humanity's future!"
A clash of swords race across a barren wasteland–
"Please! Let me save you!"
–Where two women face each other one last time.
"I can't be saved anymore! This is the only way! I won't let you stop me!"
One who has suffered and wants to belong.
"And I won't let you destroy yourself!"
And the other, who wished to heal a friend in need.
"I'm already lost!"
Unable to move forward as the darkness grows–
"As long as I'm still me, I won't stop trying to save you!"
–Yet a brilliant light burned, ready to stand beside it. It all began–
Two Years Ago….
BOOM! Thunder roared across the land as the light casts its shadow over one city; a city where the word impossible doesn't exist.
"It's been eight years since that day. The day the world became trapped in this endless rain and the day where a chain of unexplained deaths took place in our once, beautiful city. The police have no leads, scientific groups haven't discovered the cause behind the storm, and now, conspiracy theories and myths are rising."
September 1992, the eighth year where the sun's rays no longer reached off the coast of England; the Royal Quartet City.
"While the citizens have gotten used to the downpour, stranger things have been happening lately within the Dream District. A woman in a black cloak has been seen in children's rooms at midnight. Teen girls have been murdered with no signs of struggles. And recently, more sightings of odd, unexplainable creatures have been seen randomly throughout the area. Lastly, several witnesses have claimed to have seen the sun near a high-rise building. This is Wild Heart News, reporting in…"
CLICK.
"That's enough of that. I better get going. Second period is almost over."
Highschool student, Iris Blackheart, is getting herself ready for another rainy day as she finishes her breakfast and daily news. She looked in her dresser for some clothing and grabbed whatever was left; she smelled the clothes she grabbed "Wow these smell bad. I need to get some more clothes."
As she got dressed, she looked around her room, piled up dirty dishes, worn clothing all over the floor, and garbage bags along a wall.
"..... I'll get to it eventually." She sarcastically claimed as she walked towards the front door. She grabbed a purple zipper hoodie, an umbrella, and a small, silver bracelet with a heart shaped diamond embedded in the center. As she placed it on her wrist, her eyes became entranced as she thought of the day she first acquired it.
I can't believe it's been eight years since I got this thing! It's funny. It was also the last day the sun was out.
Iris looked at the clock as its arms moved and questioned what she was even leaving for. She knew she had school, but no one was there to make her go or tell her why she should go; she just felt she had to go. Looking around her room once more, Iris saw all the things that needed to be done, and wasn't up for doing it. She slapped her cheeks, rolled her head and shoulders as she loosened up, and left her apartment to go to school. She opened her umbrella as she took in the sight; the Dream district, one of the city's four major boroughs.
"Hurry up or we'll be in even more trouble!"
Iris quickly turned her head over to the hasty voice; her heart raced with excitement as the voice called to her.
Is someone really calling me?
Her gaze shot over to two adults. One was in a car telling the other to get in as he struggled to close his umbrella. The two drove off once he closed it as Iris stood there watching.
I should have known better. She let out a long sigh as she shut her front door. Iris looked at her umbrella and just threw it away, choosing to let the rain wash away the emotions she felt as she dragged herself towards her school.
Why is it always like this…
She passed by other adults running late to work, traffic workers trying their best to work in the rain, police constantly on the move to give the city a sense of security, even elders sitting by watching the sky; not one person paid her any mind as she walked. She tilted her head towards the cloudy sky as the downpour continued and muttered–
"I really wish this rain– would just wash me away already."
This city, which has long been waiting for release from the storm, lies two girls bound by fate.
SLAM!
"What was that? Who's there!"
"It's probably the rumored ghost again!"
"I thought it was only in the bathrooms!"
"Wasn't it supposed to be shaking the hallways?!"
"Forget this! I'm getting out of here!"
Several students were on their way to their next class but ran the moment Iris opened the front door of the school building.
Sigh… There they go again.
A teacher tried to calm the students down as they ran, however Iris stood in front of him.
"How about you help the student in front of you asshole?" She demanded, staring into his eyes, hoping he would scold her.
Please…
"Seriously kids, knock it off, stop running, and head right to class before you all get detention!"
The teacher chased after the other students leaving Iris behind in a now empty hallway. She dropped her bag, took a deep breath and screamed–
"STOP TREATING ME LIKE I DON'T EXIST!"
She waited for a moment to see if anyone, be it a teacher, a student, or even an animal would approach her to say or do anything to her; anything to be noticed.
RING!
The late bell went off and no one approached her.
"Whatever." She took off her sweater and started squeezing the water out onto the floor. She looked at the clock on the wall, "It's only the fourth period. Think I'll use their showers and dry off."
Why did I show up again? It's not like I'm learning anything here. Iris entered one of the school's shower rooms and changed out of her wet clothes when something caught her attention from the window.
"Is… is that– light?"
Across from Iris's school on a tall building, a golden light emanated.
"Is the sun really shining again?"
As she reached her hand out towards the light, it vanished. Did I imagine that just now?
She took one more glance around the area, but found no such light again. Unable to assert whether or not what she saw was real or not, Iris continued getting undressed, entered the shower and leaned against the wall as each droplet of hot water loosened the stress on her body.
I should enjoy this for a bit before the other girls arrive.
After thirty minutes passed, the doors opened and other girls started walking in to change as the current class ended.
"Why is the shower water on?" And here we go again.
"Don't tell me the ghost is in here now too."
"Maybe it was just a fluke! Let's just quickly shower and get out."
"I agree."
Iris walked out as the girls walked in. She dried herself off and went towards the lockers and saw a black and gold v neck shirt, short black ripped pants, and mix matched socks.
"Can I switch clothes with one of you? Mine smells a bit and they're wet." The girls continued to shower without saying anything to her. "I'll take that as a yes."
A little tight around my chest, but it'll do. She got dressed in the other girl's clothing, placed her wet clothes in the locker, leaned on a wall, waiting for them to get out and see if they noticed her. Now let's see if anyone cares.
The shower water turned off and the girls hastily walked over to the lockers.
"Huh… where are my clothes? Whose are these for? Ugh, they reek!"
"That stupid ghost steals clothing now!"
"Nowhere is safe in the school!"
Ugh, drama queens. Iris rolled her eyes, grabbed her bag, and walked out of the shower room causing them further confusion.
How much longer do they plan to keep this bullying up? Iris thought as she picked up her bag and walked the hallways of her school. For as long as she could recall, everyone in the city has treated her like she doesn't exist; no one acknowledged her presence. She couldn't grasp why anyone would treat her like she wasn't there and continued to ponder this as she arrived at her class. Before she walked inside, she took a deep breath, slapped her cheeks, and prepared herself for the bullies of her classroom. She opened the door so fast that a gust of air passed through the classroom.
"Not again!"
"Why is our classroom haunted?!"
"Is this going to happen for the rest of the year?!"
Yeah, yeah, shut up. Iris ignored their panic, quietly walking over to her desk and sat there waiting patiently to leave. The students were alarmed and panicked as the teacher made an attempt to settle them down. It was difficult to calm any of the students down as there were reports of teenagers being murdered by some invisible force; superstitions were rising as the victims increased. The teacher advised everyone to speak to each other for the remainder of the class and help calm one another down as tensions rose. Iris watched the class comfort one another and felt her chest tightened as her frustration over being ignored grew.
"Would anyone even care if I stopped coming? Even the teachers don't seem to care about me." Iris muttered to herself as her only form of communication.
"Sigh… you know what. I don't even know why I show up?!" Iris got up, threw her chair on the floor spooking the class even further and walked out. "Stupid classmates! Stupid teachers! Stupid school!" She kicked lockers, and yelled outside the classes, but nothing.
"Ugh… What do I have to do to get some attention around here?!"
"Shut up you whiny bitch!"
Iris heard a voice and immediately looked around to see who it was. Everyone was in a classroom, so who was it? Who acknowledged her?
"Where did that voice come from? Did someone hear me just now?" She searched the school looking everywhere she could think of; the gym, the lunchroom, the teacher's lounge, anywhere she could think of.
"Where? Where? Where?! Where?! WHERE?!" Soon her curiosity turned into desperation as she ran throughout every corner of the school. She wasn't sure if she was just hearing things or not, but all she knew was that she was tired of being alone for so long.
Whoever that was they have to be here somewhere. I—
RING!
Unfortunately, the final bell for school rang and just about everyone was leaving to go home. Tired from running around the school, she stopped and sat down against the wall of the hallways to catch her breath before trying again.
"So what should we try at the Cafe this time?" Iris looked up to other students chatting thinking it was directed at her.
"There's a new item on the menu that I want to try that is apparently to die for!"
"Oh, what's it called I want to try……."
Iris faced the ground as she held herself, sitting in her isolation. No one to hang out with. No one to comfort her. No one to ask her if she's okay. She tried her hardest to keep tears from flowing out of her eyes as she struggled to keep herself from breaking down.
Why? Why won't anyone see me? Why won't– anyone acknowledge me?
BANG! One of the students suddenly fell onto the ground as she struggled for air causing the students to panic; however…
Are you serious?! Iris trembled as she wiped the tears from her eyes to see if she was seeing things; she wasn't. What is that?!
Over the student was a skinny humanoid creature that wore a tattered cloak and seemed to have multiple hands wrapped around parts of its body. It had one of its hands inside the girl's mouth as it attempted to pull something out of her.
What the hell is it doing?! And why is no one reacting to it? Her heart began to beat faster than her trembling as she looked on in horror. The class started screaming in fear as the student began to cough up blood.
I need to get out of here!
Iris felt her whole body become as light as a feather as she immediately stood up in an attempt to run; the creature instantly turned to her. Iris completely froze in both mind and body. She was so afraid that she even stopped breathing as if anything would set it off. The creature walked towards her pulling something out of the student causing her death. As the class yelled in fear and agony, Iris stood there unable to move as her skin froze up in the presence of the creature slowly approaching her. Something finally acknowledged her existence, and she was far too afraid to even think of why it was happening now.
"Found you!"
Iris and the creature turned towards the voice and saw an oddly dressed rabbit. The creature immediately fled from the rabbit giving Iris a chance to reclaim herself. She fell to the ground struggling to breathe as if someone was strangling her.
(HUFF, HUFF, HUFF!) What the hell was that?! And why is no one reacting to this?! As she's gasping for air, Iris sees the rabbit leave after the creature and tries to follow it. She got up and attempted to follow, however she caught a glimpse of the student dead on the floor with her eyes pointed at her as if she could see her.
Don't, don't look at me as if you could finally see me. A tear ran down Iris's face for her fallen classmate. Whether it was because she was sad that she was possibly acknowledged after someone died or if she wished it was her that died to escape her isolation, she didn't know. All she knew was that something was out there that only she could see and that meant there could be a way to make people see her again is what she thought no matter how unreasonable a thought it may be. She ran looking for the two creatures and heard a loud sound coming from the nearby restroom.
Okay. I'm close. Need to calm myself before I see, whatever that thing was.
Iris stopped moving, closed her eyes for a moment, placed her hand on her bracelet, and headed over to investigate. She stopped again.
This is stupid. No matter how I look at it, this is stupid. What am I hoping to find?
Iris stood for a moment, listening to nearby sirens approaching the school.
After what I saw, stopping now would be crazy right?
She carried on and reached the area where the sound was loudest; the boy's bathroom. Iris stood there for a moment, embarrassed by the idea of entering a room for the opposite gender.
Okay, so I might be curious, but not that curious. It's the boy's bathroom, what if one of them is peeing or…
BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!
Multiple loud sounds came from the room again and again. Do I go in? Or do I turn around and pretend I saw nothing? Iris paced back and forth contemplating what choice to make.
"Screw it! If it were a boy in the same situation he'd go into the girl's bathroom without second guessing it! I'm doing this for gender equality!" She yelled, hardening her resolve as she nervously walked in and saw something unbelievable; a black hole lodged into the ground.
I… I must be dreaming. This can't be real. Can it?
Iris was unable to determine the thing in front of her. And yet, she felt drawn to it as if something called to her. Before she could even attempt to comprehend what was happening, she was already through the hole. She felt her body was changing, becoming, something… free. Free of all her worries. Free of isolation. Free of reality. Her vision went dark and then, like magic, she was standing somewhere far away from her school. In front of her were several abandoned, run-down apartment complexes ranging from roughly six to twelve stories tall floating on rocks and connected by train tracks.
This place looks like it's been abandoned for decades. Even the ground looks like it's been through an earthquake or two….. Somehow, this place seems familiar…
She looked at her hand and saw the rain water slip right through her as if she were a ghost.
So— this really doesn't help with my "I don't exist" anxiety. Where am I? Iris started walking towards the nearest apartment building when she suddenly heard a voice.
"How the fuck did this slut get here?!"
Iris was completely thrown off by the random words thrown in her direction and immediately sought the voice.
Where is that voice? I've heard that voice before. Iris looked and saw the oddly dressed rabbit from before. Iris grabbed the rabbit who didn't even bother to try to escape and immediately inspected it from head to toe.
"Is there like a radio or voice box attached to this thing?" She said curiously. Iris looked it in the eyes, "No way was this cute little thing the source of the voice! It's a bunny!"
SLAM!
Iris was flipped onto the ground with zero time to react. She was completely dumbfounded and tried to get the words to comprehend what happened until the rabbit got on top of her.
"Touch me like that again with your slutty hands and I will bury you like my liquor on a Saturday morning." The rabbit commanded.
Iris couldn't process or find logic in what was happening. Where was she? Why is there a talking rabbit? Why is it a bitch? Iris had too many questions on her mind.
CRACK!
Iris heard a building crack and quickly looked to see an abandoned apartment complex breaking down in front of her. She saw the cracks intensify and saw the creature from earlier get blown out of the building. She quickly moved away to avoid the creature.
"What is that thing?!" Iris asked, but the rabbit quickly ran towards the building as a person began to walk out of it. Golden light emanated from the building and only grew brighter.
What's happening?
Iris tried to look as best as she could until someone came into clear view. A petite, teen girl in a dark blue jacket with glowing golden long hair had Iris in awe of her unique appearance. She pulled out a red curved sword with a rose shaped handle on it and a clock embedded in the center of the rose.
"Abby– Clock in."
The rabbit was drawn into the clock as the needle turned and a strong golden light glowed from the sword. She took a stance, readying her blade, and prepared to battle the creature. It removed its cloak, unleashed its other four arms that were surrounding its body, and lounged at the girl. The girl is pushed back into the building as their battle carries through the floors. Iris could hear the sounds of their attacks rise slowly getting quieter as she thought of whether she should follow them or not.
"I don't know what's happening, but I can't sit here and wait to see what happens. I walked through the weird hole, I'm going to see this through to the end!"
Iris ran into the building, ran up the stairs, and looked for the girl and the creature. As she got closer to the top, she stopped hearing any sort of loud sounds.
Is it, is it over? Iris felt concerned now that she was at the door to the rooftop. Who won? The girl or the creature? If the creature won, Iris would be her next target. But if the girl won, what happens next?
I– I can't stand here and wait for something to happen.
She grabbed the door handle with hands drenched in sweat and uncontrollable shaking of fear from the unknown; whatever happens next, nothing would be the same for her.

Ego lawn mower battery not charging on my charger or my neighbor’s charger, unless I tap battery firmly on garage floor.
Impossible to reach Ego customer service as Battery is still covered under warranty
Any ideas on how this can be resolved to my benefit.

I've been driving small roads on and off for a while. Long story short I was driving and me and mom got lost (we pretty much were driving around the back side that's usually not busy and missed a turn somewhere and ended up driving down a mountain) My driving was fine the people behind me kept having a crap attack...
5 people passed me illegally today even though I was doing the speed limit. 3 of them on the damn curvy ass mountain, I got honked at the green light even though it literally wasn't green for one second, had a corvette driver ride my ass the entire time on the mountain because I slowed down for the super tight curves in an unfamiliar road. I also had 2 pull out in front of me without using a blinker today.
I'm a new driver this was my first time in a bigger town and I hated every second of it. I can drive fine. Driving isn't my issue, it's the fucking idiots that damn near cause me to wreck and give me a headache the 2nd I get home.

Ghosts of the deep flawless This one was a doozy, it took a LOT of practice to get it down, especially memorizing the Location of the symbols in the water section when facing ECTHAR. The first encounter isn't really anything to write home about, I used eyes of tomorrow to just clear up everything that spawned at every symbol location, or just kill the witches and go on to the next section. Repeat this four times and you're done.
When I was first practicing for this run, I realized I was pretty slow, especially in comparison to when I'm on hunter where Ecthar could barely catch me, I'd juke him behind the stone pillars and make my way through. So, I changed it up from having high recovery to T5 recovery and send my mobility to T7. This felt MUCH MUCH better, without this tier of speed, being underwater felt like such a slog pushing through, and Ecthar would even shield bash me, that got annoying. But seriously though this dungeon is amazing, it's beautiful, the underwater sections are so unique in how they fit into the mechanics of the dungeon. Having Ecthar behind you at all times, like a shark ready to send you to your end should you slow down or slip up keeps the nerves tense, at least for the first few times. For damage phase I took the offensive route with Synthocepts instead of being safe with Loreley, I would do this for the final boss as well. Loreley is for sure the way to go about it for being safe, but when you're Doing damage like this it's hard to want to put it down, ended up 4 phasing Ecthar.
When it comes to the final boss I feel like they made the encounter entirely too long, combine the shield, the boss health and the mechanics in between, this gives you a LOT of freedom to slip up and die in so many ways. The amount of micromanagement you have to do is insane. Watch out for stray moths, watch out for the elites shooting ya, watch out for the acolytes shooting ya. Moths can spawn from a downed enemy and suddenly blow up thus ending your run, moths can spawn after aligning the first two symbols to reveal them by the boss. Killed VOHLOG but didn't reveal a symbol? Moths are spawned once again by the boss. SO MANY things can and will go wrong. You really have to be on your toes. I learned a lot of things through trial and error, as well asking friends in datto's discord for advice on how to handle it.
For final boss damage phase, I tried Actium+Xenophage, that didn't work out well for me, it felt frustrating seeing my damage do so little to take down the boss's health bar. Popping super and then pulling out the setup to do damage I would die too fast from taking too much damage . I tried bait and switch Cataclysmic, still didn't work out. I tried taipan, and that was also a no-go. Rocket damage didn't feel great, and bump in the night felt too slow, so I put that down completely. I got advice from a fellow titan to keep a sunspot from the super under my feet after damaging the boss, that kinda worked, but then I'd die. I brought up the idea of just clearing out the acolytes before starting damage, after grabbing the last symbol. Use about 30 seconds of the symbol timer and just clean out the Acolytes and keep the thrall to reproc radiant, it worked great! I didn't have a bunch of things adding to the damage I was taking from the boss. Leviathan's breath, good god does this thing CHUNK, I love it. Quite a few are afraid to use it because of the possibility of their DPS dying should they miss a shot. I'm telling ya, you don't have to worry about that. I would once in a while miss 1 or 2 shots, but getting back into tempo more than made up for those missed ones, I hit all of my shots afterward. This is what a scuffed First phase looks like, By the third phase it looked like this. I was able to kill the boss in a total of 5 Phases, it felt amazing. Bob and weave when doing damage as well, quite a bit of her arc shots missed me when I'd do that. I'm not great at explaining how to be efficient, but do take your time, and find a rotation that works for you. This felt amazing to do! Ty for reading, and a Major Ty to Pat#3298 for helping me figure out strats!

I've been driving small roads on and off for a while. Long story short I was driving and me and mom got lost (we pretty much were driving around the back side that's usually not busy and missed a turn somewhere and ended up driving down a mountain) My driving was fine the people behind me kept having a crap attack...
5 people passed me illegally today even though I was doing the speed limit. 3 of them on the damn curvy ass mountain, I got honked at the green light even though it literally wasn't green for one second, had a corvette driver ride my ass the entire time on the mountain because I slowed down for the super tight curves in an unfamiliar road. I also had 2 pull out in front of me without using a blinker today.
I'm a new driver this was my first time in a bigger town and I hated every second of it. I can drive fine. Driving isn't my issue, it's the fucking idiots that damn near cause me to wreck and give me a headache the 2nd I get home.

"Incredible!"
Feraz spoke the word at barely a whisper, but Agila woke nonetheless. Something about the forest gave her strange dreams, and she slept fitfully after they had exchanged places and Feraz began his shift tending the fire and watching for threats. Feraz was crouched next to the fire with a piece of one of the sea weed like ferns on the ground beside him. He had mashed some of it into a paste, and was applying it to his left hand.
"You don't think that's risky?" Agila asked, stretching as she rose from the ground. Feraz put down the wad of mash and lifted his other hand. It was stained green but otherwise Agila could notice nothing strange.
"You have two hands, yes, well done," she said sarcastically.
Feraz rolled his eyes. "I had two injured hands last night," he said. "Not used to starting fires with nothing but sticks. I crushed up some fern and put it on one of the sores on my right hand a few hours ago, now the whole hand is healed."
Agila raised both her eyebrows. No wonder healers would pay for it at a premium, she thought. Feraz held up his hand that still had open cuts. "Look!" he said. Agila walked over and her eyes went wide as she saw the redness around the wound fade. A thick green scab formed over the cut, and Feraz flexed his hand. "Amazing," he said. "Another hour and both hands will be good as new."
Feraz rose from his crouch. The darkness was slowly fading as dim rays of light began to trickle through the canopy overhead. "Dawn has come, thank the gods," he said. Agila looked down the slope they had been travelling before they had stopped in a hurry the day before. Already she noticed a few different varieties of plants that she hadn't seen when they first entered.
"We should collect some of that sea fern," she said. "There's no telling how deep it grows." Feraz nodded, and his stomach growled audibly. He looked down, then met Agilas eyes. "Don't try to eat it," she said. Feraz smiled and stalked off to collect more of the healing fern, whistling as he did to make sure he stayed within earshot.
Agila stomped out the fire, then withdrew her dagger and narrowed her curious eyes on it.
"I don't suppose 'find breakfast' is a valid command?" she asked. Agila smirked, and was about to sheath the dagger when a fine silver thread appeared at the tip of the blade, then snaked down the slope through the trees.
"Uh, Feraz?"
"What do you mean you don't see it?"
Agila pointed her dagger down the slope in the direction of the thread coming off the blade. Feraz shrugged. "I'm not sure how else to phrase it, Darkmoon. There's nothing there." Agila sighed, but stopped herself from sheathing the dagger. She could feel... something. It was that same rushing feeling she felt when she had made the blade ignite the night before.
"Stay close," she said, and began following the silver filament. They crossed between trees and over dense shrubs before the filament went down into the ground at the base of a plant. It was fairly ordinary looking compared to the other strange plants with their odd colors and unnatural movements.
"This is what it was pointing to," she said, sheathing the dagger. Feraz knelt down and sniffed the plant, then looked at Agila quizzically. "It smells kind of like..." He grabbed the stalk of the plant and pulled. "Turnips!" he said, brushing one off and taking a bite. They found four more plants nearby, had a bite to eat and then packed the rest away alongside the healing ferns in a bag Feraz had woven from sapling fibers during his nightshift.
They continued deeper into the forest, and Agila couldn't help but laugh at the spring in the step of her companion. "You're in a good mood, Feraz," she said. He turned, walking backwards as he spoke. "I survived the night, had a bite to eat and have a natural born prowess channeler on my side," he said. "I'm in a great mood." Agila chuckled and shrugged.
"I don't know about the natural born part," she said. Feraz stopped. "I do," he said. "I didn't want to tell you last night. I figured confidence couldn't hurt." Agila scrunched her face. "We said no secrets." Feraz raised his hands. "No relevant secrets, if I recall," he started. "Besides, we've been a bit busy absolutely killing it at this not getting killed business." Agila rolled her eyes. "What, then?"
Feraz looked at her with a strange expression on his face, and Agila realized with a start that it was admiration. "People used to train their whole lives to learn how to use prowess, kid. I once heard of a mob boss that spent a fortune on a relic, and after a decade of trying he couldn't get it to do anything."
Agila kept walking, and Feraz fell in beside her. "Things like fire, light, and minor enhancement of physical traits are considered lesser powers when it comes to prowess, but even the royals take years learning how to do them," he said, then tapped her arm to get her to stop. "What you did this morning, Agila. I think it was wayfinding. That kind of thing is once in a century rare and- hey are you listening to me?"
She wasn't. Her eyes were locked on something behind him. Feraz turned and laid his own eyes on what had drained the color from Agilas face. A huge stone outcrop cut out from the forest floor. There was a large cave opening in the side facing them. Spread in a circle at the mouth of the cave was the most bones Feraz had ever seen in one place. He gulped audibly.
"My mood may be faltering."

I, M(13) go to a middle school that’s multi-racial, consisting of whites Asians and Hispanics. Most people there I’m chill with and they are back to me as well, but there’s one Hispanic kid that has gotten on my nerves for the longest time. We’ll call him Jack for this scenario.
The story behind Jack and I go back to earlier this year, roughly around September when we sat next to each other in science, I thought he was cool and chill guy to be with up until we moved from science to history. After the switch every time he would see me he would always say something in Spanish I wouldn’t understand. It would get to the point to where every day we made visual contact within talking range he would say it all the time. Me being illiterate and unable to comprehend what he says, I would assume it’s a quirky or slang in Spanish. And also this had been going on for 2 quarters or roughly January-May.
Now that’s just the back story between us, but for why I poured water, but to begin with, my girlfriend and I decided to sit on some benches outside on campus one lunch. I was hesitant to go because I noticed he was nearby but I figured it would be fine to sit down. And this is where I cause chaos. As said before every time we’re nearby he would say something in Spanish. Since I was next to my girlfriend I got really embarrassed when he said whatever he said. After what he said I splashed A LITTLE BIT water on him for fun but also in retaliation. One of his friends saw me and I tried explaining to her why I splashed water on him but she continued to cuss me out. Couple minutes later one of them pulls out an ENTIRE bottle of water on me and dunks the whole bottle. I didn’t really care as much as they did so they pull out another entire full bottle on me, but luckily one of the lunch time supervisors stops all of the ruckus and end it’s all. Jack and I go up to the office and I explain to the supervisor the situation and the history behind why I poured water. Somehow the supervisor was on my side and we got the vice principal included and she too was on my side given what Jack does to me is considered harassment. But as expected I got lunch detention for 2 days but after that everything was over.
So be honest, AITA?

"Now there's a sight that never gets old," The Captain said, superstitiously pulling his warded necklace out from under his shirt.
The spotters nest was empty as the twisting spires of Violus City rose up to touch the failing light of day. The capital city. The crown jewel of a Kingdom that spanned more than half the globe and the entirety of the settled lands of man. The whole crew of the airship was on the deck watching as the heart of the city crested the horizon and eclipsed the setting sun.
As they passed into the shadow of that great and magnificent city, Hark felt a familiar chill pass over him. The aura that permeated this ancient place. The prowess. The echoes of the old ones who built the city through their mastery of that great and mysterious power. So much has been lost, he thought. What would the world look like if the sages hadn't been sacrificed? An edict his father had enacted a decade ago made even minor use of the prowess forbidden to all but those of royal lineage.
"Interceptor inbound, Captain," the spotter said. He was on the deck with the rest of the crew, but was still using his spyglass. The Captain nodded, then shot a nervous glance at Hark.
"I hope your visit will be well received, Warden."
Hark had little reason to think so. He had spent more than half of his life in Violus, under the tutelage of the Kings Loremaster, Toval. When the more delicate histories of the Kingdom came to light in the later years of his studies, Hark fled. He was sixteen when he left a note on his nightstand addressed to the King, and boarded an airship to the remote prison island of Irgalath.
To this day, he does not know what the King had said to the man who held the position of Warden at that time. When Hark disembarked his airship, he turned himself in. He fully expected, and was willing, to spend the rest of his life in prison for abandoning his post. The Warden put a sword in his hand instead. That man took him to the mat for two years until Hark could hold his own against the brutal fighting styles of the criminal underworld.
An interceptor closed in, pulling up alongside the older airship as Hark put up his hand in greeting. The interceptor airships of the Capital City were a more recent design. They were built for speed and delivering strategic blows using hit and run tactics. Despite Harks gesture of peace, he could see the interceptors two broadside cannons were manned. A man who wore the uniform of a high ranking official grabbed a golden bangle on his wrist, and his voice boomed out across the divide.
"Unknown vessel, we have no flight record of your arrival. You are trespassing in Violus airspace. Divert course now, or make peace with your gods."
A relic! Hark thought, and from the reactions of the rest of the crew, they were equally awed to see someone openly use the prowess. Is that...
"Cousin!" Hark bellowed out, struggling to carry his voice over the combined roar of the airship engines. The Captain of the interceptor gestured to one of his men, who handed him a spyglass. He peered through, and Hark saw recognition register on his face, followed by a wide grin.
"Proceed to docking bay five. Mooring nine," the man said.
"You owe me a drink, Harkenon."
I wish he hadn't used my full name, Hark thought.
The rest of the flight to the docking bay was short, but the crew was already acting weird around him. There was a reason he went by 'Hark'. While not a common name, it did sound like a commoner name. His full name was clearly royal. His mother had given it to him in secret, and had him named formally at temple before his father could deny the choice. She used to tell him that the King was furious when he found out. While still of a noble line, she was not Queen, and Hark could never be his heir.
The choice his mother made was not by virtue of ambition, or ego. He was born early, and during a conjunction; when all the planets aligned in the heavens. His memories of his mother were distant now, but Hark will never forget her description of what she felt when her only son first opened his eyes. A feeling he learned a name for during his studies at Violus after he was taken from her.
The touch of the prowess.
Hark was deep in thought as he stepped off the airship ramp onto the dock, but no sooner had his feet hit the stone, than he was wrapped in an embrace and lifted up off of them.
"Torvinad!" Hark said through a strained breath. "It's been too long, cousin." The man put Hark down and straightened out his jacket. "It's Fleet Commander Torvinad to most, you scoundrel," he said, winking. Hark could not help but smile. Torvinad always had that effect on him growing up. As son of the Kings brother, they had both been trained under Loremaster Toval at the same time. Leaving his best friend behind was the hardest part of Harks exodus, and he missed him dearly.
The pair walked down the dock towards the tall marble pillars on either side of the entrance to the docking bay of the city. The docking bay opened up into an industrial district, beyond which was the commons. A noble district was perched above the commons on a tier below the palace district, surrounding and including the great central spire of the city. Hark was relieved when a carriage pulled up at the gate. Torvinad clapped Hark on the shoulders.
"Didn't think I'd make you walk, did you?" he said, laughing. They got into the carriage and it sped off down the road. There was a much higher military presence in the city than Hark remembered, and something else was bothering him.
"Do they always send the Fleet Commander out to investigate stray airships?" he asked. Torvinad tensed, and some of the mirth fled from his features. "Oh, we don't have to talk about all that business yet, do we?" he replied. "How have you been, Hark? Any lady friends on that island of yours?" he asked, smirking and cocking his eyebrows up and down. Don't you dare, Hark thought, threatening the rising heat under his collar. "Not much time for that, I'm afraid," he said. The smile on Torvinads face grew wider. "Your cheeks tell a different tale, my friend."
Hark raised a finger to protest, but his cousin cut him off. "Over drinks, Hark! Be gentle with me, I can only take so much of your bashful charm at once," he said, but his smile dropped as he studied his cousins face. "What is it?" he asked. Hark met his eyes, unable to mask the grim anticipation of his purpose in Violus. "Our drink will have to wait, Tor," he said.
"I need to speak with my father."

I know that I probably sound really impatient but I can’t help feel my 12 month old son is falling behind with his motor skills. He is able to pull himself up on anything and everything but when it comes to walking or even standing independently it’s like he doesn’t even want to try. I’ve caught him “accidentally” standing on his own once but once he realized he wasn’t holding onto anything he immediately dropped to his butt. I don’t think it’s a confidence thing because I encourage him whenever he falls and sometimes he will sling himself back from sitting and he thinks it’s funny.
I do want to note that I am partially selfish for being impatient. He is the largest child his age that I have seen in person(28lbs and 30in at 3 months ago). HOWEVER, he is also extremely strong and has lifted things several pounds and thrown them feet away. He also will hold onto something and jump a couple inches in the air and squat and repeat.
I feel like there is definitely something that I can do to help him but I’m clueless. Just looking for reassurance or advice to get him walking to save my back.

I want to grab you from behind your ears
So hard that my nails dig into the skin
And pull you down to my level, so that you can hear-
Really hear what I have to say,
Do my best to make sure it doesn't leak from your brain,
Let the blood drip down my hand, your chin
​
That I do not deserve you,
In any capacity
But this is something greater than me
And I would say that nothing is infinite
That all love fades away eventually
Like the pond in my backyard
Like the blonde in my sister's hair
​
And so it does
But its a wave
On the cosmic shore
Being tugged forever back and forth
​
And I should really reiterate
That this is the deal we made
That this is what we agreed to
​
Love is my mother's rage, love is a sick dog, love is my grandma's unread email
It is death and rebirth and everything and nothing at all
​
But, I don't know
A second is a second is a second is a second
And a second with you is a second broken down infinitesimally
And maybe, I already got my eternity
​
And maybe it doesn't work out this go around
Maybe there'll be vast swathes of time where we are just not together
​
You love me,
Ah - you love me not
Two blades of grass grown around each other, from the roots up, in one life
Rotting, rotting things in the other
​
I'll sit and rust with you under the sun any day of the week
If we are the chips in the paint on my wall
The dirt on my shoes
The grime in my teeth
The graves beside my house that have eroded back into the earth
- I'll just be glad that I got more time with you
​
And I am not a violent person
But this life has shaped me into something unrecognizable
Gnashing teeth and chewed-up gums
And if holding on is an act of war
Then I’m sorry
But it will always be the first thing I do
​
If this love wavers
So be it
It’ll come back
Everything does.
​
https://www.reddit.com/OCPoetry/comments/13x2sci/stag/
https://www.reddit.com/OCPoetry/comments/13x0iib/pursuit_of_perfection/
Songs I think that match the tone I was going for ;>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L5UQmzbrE_k
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j2FazbkwydA

Hello everyone I hope everyone is doing good
Okay rant time, I recently started posting spiral abyss content in YT everything is going well and I'm gaining subs at a steady pace. yes as my username says the channel's name is also copium.
I thought 3.6 12-1 was a nightmare with those consecrated beasts but after fighting them on a daily basis for content i figured out the rng behind the beasts and life was easy.
Usually abyss floors are catered in way that it'll make you wanna pull for the specific patch's limited 5 stars.
But idk what is hoyoverse thinking but the new 12-1 doesn't make sense 😂
You have the annoying whopper flowers in first half which just tp even if you group them hugging the wall and there's 2 waves. You get past them to meet 2 waves of mini doritos which again will disappear if you don't kill them fast enough so having a electro unit is a must.
From f2p perspective without kazuha you'll have less than 1 minute 40 seconds for the second half.
Now for the second half you have a hydro and cryo mage in the first wave which are no big deal if you have Xiangling and Bennet but then the difficulty cranks upto 1000 you get not one but 3 abyss heralds one of them is hydro and the remaining 2 are cryo.
For some odd reason the cryo heralds are in sync like 90% of the time so without a shielder you get one shotted even a 55k hp zhongli shield will only withstand 4 of those attacks and those cryo heralds do a fast 4 hit combo, with 2 of them it's a 8 hit combo while the hydro herald will be spinning like a Beyblade and one hit from him you get frozen because you're already inflicted with cryo from the other heralds.
Now for the fun part when you bring them to 20% hp and they shield up the rng goes wack. They just keep moving away from you wasting so much time it is literally impossible to 3 star without having brain damage.
During this shield phase the chances of getting frozen is very high because the attacks will be infused with their respective elements.
Cryo Herald's shield won't budge THAT THING DOES NOT GO DOWN EVEN IN A TRIPLE PYRO BENNET,KAZUHA, XIANGLING COMBO.
Now we have a look at 12-2 and 12-3 second half we have the thunder bat and the Baptist
You cannot raiden national 12-2 because the bat is immune to electro unless you have a busted Xiangling with 60-150 C6 6-9-9 talents and 250 ER
You can't use a hyperbloom team also since the bat will reverse uno them back to you.
Like what do you want us to do mihoyo for 150 primos it's just too much work 😂
Realistically there's only like maybe 4 team comps that you can use if you want to 9 star this abyss cycle and from both CC and player's perspective it's not good.
Mihoyo I'd like to have my death roll crocodile back in 12-1 thanks
Idk,what do you all think that can be used in floor 12 because the floor gave me a huge migrane first thing in the morning
Anyone who comes across this post I'd appreciate some team suggestions and strats,thanks in advance 😇