Hvac technician apprentice jobs near me

Hi I just need to vent about this to someone bc lord knows I can't to anyone I know
I lost my job in January due to severe mental health problems (which I still havent been treated for! Love the nhs) and have been running on savings and student finance while trying to get a new one. However I never got my final student loan payment due to intermitting and idk if I'm just unlikeable or what but every interview has been a bust and although I've been stretching as far as I can I'm running out of money and am now living on one meal a day. I do have a wfh job but it's barely any hours a week.
See I am going back to uni in the autumn, and through this I needed to find another accomodation for next year which I did fine. However the lease starts in July, and the lease for my current accomodation ends in September. The landlord of my current accom just got back to me saying I can't end my lease early (even though I'll be moving out in July anyway bc this place sucks), and I can't push back the start of my new lease.
I can pay June's rent and I've already paid (most) of my rent for the new place in July but now I need to pull another 4 months of rent out of my ass. I have an interview on Tuesday for a job that paired with my current job with cover nearly three of those months, which isn't enough but it's a lot more manageable. Basically if I don't get this job I genuinely don't know what I will do and I don't know who to complain about this too so I came here lol
tldr: if I don't get this job I can't afford rent

I live in Texas… it’s June so it’s already above 90° every day. Our AC stopped cooling on Monday (memorial day), so I put in an AHS service request. We’re new homeowners, so we felt relieved to have a home warranty to help with an AC problem right at the start of summer. Little did we know AHS is the worst company on the planet.
The set us up with a company called Millenial HVAC and said we had an appointment Wednesday between 8-12. We though, great, only 2 nights of sleeping in a hot house, we can handle that. On Tuesday I got a text from someone with Millenial HVAC… he asked when we’re available because he can come out this week. I said we’re available anytime but that AHS said we had an appt for Wednesday. I sent him a screenshot… no response. Just to be safe, I chatted with AHS customer service. She assured me my appointment was set for Wednesday.
Wednesday rolls around and no one shows up. I call Millenial several times, no answer and no call back. I reached out to AHS again and then said to give them 24 hours to respond.
Then it’s Thursday and still no response and no technician. I called Millenial HVAC a million times, left voicemails… nothing. I called AHS to say we need a tech TODAY. Mind you, I’ve already paid the $85 for a service call. The MFer tells me I have to wait 24 hours for them to respond. How does it make sense that a company no shows my appointment that was scheduled on MONDAY, but I have to wait until FRIDAY until I can get switched to another contractor?? I pulled a Karen and asked for a manager and was told there isn’t one available.
What do I do?? It’s currently 5am and I’m up bc I can’t sleep bc our house is so damn hot. At this point I feel like I should just hire a company outside of AHS and pay out of pocket. Will they refund my $85??

I have been offered a role at an international company in Zurich as a Product Designer (UX UI) and was wondering if there's any advice or someone in the industry to let me know if the offer I have is sustainable for the standard of living in the area. I live in the UK and just trying to compare Pro / Cons.
They have offered me a 100k wage gross for a juniomid level position as a designer. However, my partner who is a graphic designer here in the UK won't have a job in the beginning, so we will have to get by with one wage. My questions are:
- I know it's subjective, but how hard could it be for her to find a role as a graphic designer without knowing German? (we both plan to learn it, but obviously in the beginning we won't be speaking it).
- Is the 100k wage enough for both to live ok in Zurich (near zurich) to start with? Our life currently is comfortable but we don't save much in the UK.
- What wage for both of us would be sustainable to have a decent life in the area, presuming she finds a job in her industry? (I know it's subjective, but comfortable for us means not looking at grocery prices too much, going on holidays occasionally and restaurants from time to time We love sports and outdoors so that's not very expensive!).
Thank you so much for the help!

Hello. I run a local museum in the small Finnish city of Tampere and I'm Julia Ellie.
There are many local and national museums in Finland, but there are few cases where a young woman like me is the director of the museum.
The Entari Museum, which I am in charge of, is more special than any other museum in Finland because it is not only me but also my parents who have inherited it from generation to generation and are in charge of the operation of a local museum.
However, since I became the director of the museum, our Entari Museum has a new feature and advantage that is not seen at all in other Finnish museums, and recently our museum has become more popular.
And the reason for this special advantage was the wisdom of Koreans living near the Entari Museum. I was born in a small town in Tampere, which is home to some poor people in Finland.
My father and mother, who co-operated a small local museum in Tampere, were in charge of running the museum's directorate, a rather unusual job, but they couldn't make that much money, so our house was always.
However, my parents have always been proud of the management of the Entari Museum, which they inherited from my grandfather, but somehow, I felt foolish to see them as a child.
Because there was a separate local government that directly received and managed the museum's profits, and my parents just helped the museum's overall operation or admission to the repair ticket, so no matter how hard it was operated, there were people who really benefited.
My parents continued running the museum by taking turns with my father and mother without a day off during the week, and with the money they earned, I, the only daughter, didn't want to inherit the museum's management, and invested a lot of money in my studies.
Since I was young, I grew up watching my parents go to work day and night, and of course, I even thought that I should never inherit the operation of the museum.

Ok so a past history of sexual and emotional abuse has put me in a vulnerable situation
I am a fresh post-graduate, ND and quite emotionally immature. People guess my age at 20 or younger because of how I look and act. Very new to my career, very shy, anxiety, body dysmorphia, eating disorder, highly insecure, and it shows.
My boss is globally renowned for his expertise. He is the owner and director of our company. Very powerful and influential within this industry. We work one-on-one, in a tiny office, basically glued to his hip. He is nearly 70 years old.
I am handing my notice in, as I have found a new job. But I want confirmation that this is NOT ACCEPTABLE, and I have not spent the last 12 months being trauma-triggered for no reason.
Here are all the problems:

• Every day, he tells me some harrowing story he heard about girls and women being raped. He tells it in a "isn't that terrible" way but goes into gory detail. It triggers me. I am visibly distressed when he talks about this. He says it's "terrible" but seems entertained by the stories. I know I should speak up but I have fawn response.
  
• When we are driving, he rubbernecks to look at the schoolgirls
  
• Has referred to underage people as having "young hot hormonal bodies"
  
• Says how he "needs to be so careful" around young girls for "fear of my actions being taken out of context and being reprimanded"
  
• Talks about how his 5 year old nieces put on "tiktok dance shows in their leotards" for him
  
• I catch him staring at my legs, crotch, ass, all the time.
  
• When I wear Converse he gets really excited and starts talking about when he was growing up, how all the schoolgirls wore Converse
  
• He calls me by pet names like "petal" instead of my actual name. He doesn't do this with anyone else
  
• He actually got arrested once for the rape and murder of a young girl. He was found not guilty, and someone else was convicted, but he tells the story as if it's hilarious and very entertaining.
  
• Talks about how all his adverts online are of things for little girls - like little girls underwear, clothes, toys, and stuff. Don't think he realises how targeted adverts work...
  
• He touches me at any opportunity. If he asks to see something on my computer screen, he will practically drape himself over my lap. I flinch away in disgust and he says "oh sorry" but continues to do it.
  
• always makes weird comments about my sex life and relationship. Says how my partner is no good and I should run away with him etc.
  
• One time we were driving for 1 hour with another older, well-seasoned male in the car. My boss insisted on spending the entire journey talking about child rape. I sat, in the back seat, in stony silence for the entire journey. He tried joking about rape during that journey and directed the joke at me. Can't remember fully but something like how I would "know all about dirty things" or some shit
  

I feel this is all totally inappropriate - but especially for a man of his age and position, directed towards a girl of my age and position.
I feel like he intends to intimidate and upset me?
There is SO MUCH more, but the last 12 months I have been mentally blocking it all out just so I can get through the week.

Hi
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This and last year have been so hard to deal with, and I am struggling to do anything every single day. I want to live, I want to be okay, but nothing is okay in my life and its getting ever harder and harder to cope.
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Last last year I broke up with my ex, which we still continue seeing each other and there is so much conflict there, hurt and lack of understanding. I was diagnosed ADHD at the beginning of this year, and was medicated which helped heaps for several months. I was later diagnosed with heart failure and since then everything in my life has declined at a pace I cannot deal with. There are days where I get symptoms of heart failure and it destroys me. I go to hospital and the person I care about most does not take it seriously. Furthermore I was effectively fired, or made redundant from my job as a result of decreased performance, and poor communication. My poor communication was me taking days off frequently as a result of my heart failure.
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I cant be medicated with anti depressants or ADHD medication due to a risk of worsening the heart failure, or 'sudden death'.
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I don't have the energy to talk to family. I don't want to see friends. Doing chores is near impossible. I start a new job soon, and I do not want to. I don't want to do anything.
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I am tired of overwhelming feelings that are constant.
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I am 21 and so tired.

I am about to start the final year of my Bachelor's in Mechanical Engineering, after which I am expected to get a job. Currently, I have been away from home for about 5 days for a month long unpaid internship. Each and every moment I get time, I think about when this month is going to end and when I can go back home.
I get little peace in thinking that a month is going to be over pretty soon, because immediately I think about what I am going to do after my graduation. I always wanted to be an automotive engineer. There are no automotive industries near my city. In other words, if I wanted to do anything related to automobiles, I'd have to move.
I've gotten incredibly homesick. The regional language here is different than the one I speak at home. I do not understand this language. However, everyone here knows English and if I ask them to speak in English, they do. However, they're always talking in their language among themselves which is perfectly normal, but it makes me feel like the odd one out.
At this point, I'm even doubting my career choices. I'm not even sure I like Mechanical Engineering as much. I was good at coding and I liked it too. For some reason, I do not like the lifestyle of a software engineer. It feels as if there's no fun and you're constantly sitting in front of a screen all day.
All the interactions and a foreign place scare me a lot. Everything is so much easier back home where I've got people who have my back. Part of me thinks that it's going to be okay, this is the first time I'm away from home on my own. Maybe I'll learn to communicate better and arrange stuff for me. Maybe these homesick feelings can go away if I receive a stable income out of my job.
If I want to stay with my original career choice (which I really do), I have to move out eventually. I'll have to make new friends and adjust to that new environment. Currently, I really don't know how to go about finding a place to live in and making new friends.
Before this internship, I was under the impression that getting a job I love and that pays well will fix a lot of things. Now, it feels like getting a job will only be the start to a bunch of other real world problems.
I am really really scared.

If you are considering one of the various careers in psychology, you surely want to understand more about the desirable personality traits of psychologists. Clients are more likely to open up using active listening and reflection techniques. Psychologists convey an acceptance and understanding of the emotions being expressed. If you are looking for Educational psychologist near me, choose the one with the skill of empathy. Any personality type can succeed in a job in psychology, but some personality types appear to draw toward it more than others. People who work in psychology must develop their professional abilities and adapt to their settings, just like anyone in any career.

Today, I wanted to share with you a deeply personal story about how living in a third world country has had a profound negative impact on my life and happiness. It's not easy for me to put these thoughts into words, but I believe it's important to shed light on the barriers and limitations that many of us face in pursuing our dreams and aspirations.
From an early age, I had an insatiable thirst for knowledge and a passion for pure mathematics and physics. These subjects fascinated me and I dreamed of delving deep into their intricacies, discovering new frontiers of understanding, and making a meaningful contribution to the world. However, my dreams were shattered by the stark reality of my circumstances.
In my country, job opportunities outside the realm of medicine are scarce, almost nonexistent. The pressure to conform to societal expectations and pursue a career in medicine became an ever-present weight on my shoulders. The idea of sacrificing my true passion for the sake of practicality and societal norms was a bitter pill to swallow. It felt like I was being forced into a life that I had no desire for, and that realization brought me immense sorrow.
At the age of 17, a glimmer of hope appeared on the horizon when I earned a scholarship to study mathematics in the UK. It was an opportunity to escape the constraints of my country, pursue my passion, and chase the dreams that seemed so out of reach. However, parental pressure and their fear of losing me became insurmountable obstacles. In their eyes, nothing could equate to the honor and stability of becoming a medical doctor. Regrettably, my chance to seize that scholarship was lost.
A year later, as I prepared to reapply and reclaim my dreams, the world was thrown into turmoil with the rise of extremist ideologies. The terrifying specter of ISIS dominated headlines, making it nearly impossible for someone from my country to secure a visa to study abroad. The stars had seemingly aligned against me, and I found myself trapped in a cycle of unfulfilling compromises.
Living in a third world country, where opportunities are scarce and dreams are often sacrificed at the altar of practicality, has taken a toll on my mental and emotional well-being. It's a constant battle between the desire to break free from the shackles of societal expectations and the pressure to conform and secure a stable future. The feeling of being trapped in a profession I despise, as a junior resident in the medical field, only amplifies my frustration and unhappiness.
I share my story not to seek pity or sympathy, but to shed light on the struggles faced by countless individuals living in similar circumstances. We yearn for opportunities to pursue our passions, to make a difference in fields beyond the limitations imposed by our societies. We want to embrace our true potential and contribute to the world in ways that resonate with our deepest aspirations.
To all those who find themselves in similar situations, I want to say that you are not alone. Your dreams are valid, and your passion is worth fighting for. It may be an uphill battle, but resilience and perseverance can triumph over the most daunting challenges. Seek support from communities like healthygamergg, where understanding and empathy thrive, and where we can find solace in knowing that we are not alone in our struggles.
Together, let us continue to raise our voices, advocate for change, and inspire future generations to challenge the limitations imposed upon us. Let us work towards a world where opportunities are not limited by societal expectations, but where individuals are encouraged to pursue their passions and carve their own paths to happiness and fulfillment.
P.s.: yes, i used ChatGPT as an aid to write this post, but this doesn’t detract anything from its original meaning.

Context:
I'm a student nearing graduation with a B.S in computer science & engineering. My focus is cybersecurity but I have practical industry and open-source experience in fullstack engineering, system administration, and software engineering with a large majority of my practical experience being fullstack and cyber.
A friend I met a cyber convention who I keep in touch with and occassionally play games online with casually mentioned one day that he's been setting up a start-up in the background and pitched to me that he would like to hire me for a fullstack engineering position if possible; I essentially said I'll consider their offer.
Situation:
I am now actually considering their offer because my job search hasn't been successful at all. I currently work part-time remotely for another company but it's unclear if it will turn into a full-time position. While the job is fun and great experience, the current pay is not something I can make a proper living out of nor even a career in the long-term.
Since the startup world is unknown territory, I generally have no idea what questions I should be asking beyond compensation. I don't really know how to ask questions that will give me a good idea on how to gauge the legitimacy and also work environment of a startup. In fact, because it was mentioned casually, I'm unsure if this is a side-gig type job, another part-time, or even a potential full-time position, let alone the expectations on both their side and my side.
Even though they're are a good friend, I'm just cautious of what I might be getting into so any advice and suggestions on how to approached and gauge their startup would be appreciated!!!! thank you!!!

Part 2
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Recently, I have been hit by a writing bug for a story I’m working on, where the entire thing will be a combination of Warehouse 13 and Kingdom Hearts. I want the story to be a critique of both how postmodernism functions and how it destroys contemporary culture by trying to subvert that which works and that which people enjoy. In order for me to write this story, I am required to study both postmodernism and satire of postmodernism, which has strangely led me to a little cartoon from the middle of the 2000s known as Drawn Together.
It ran for 3 seasons, had a direct-to-DVD movie, and vanished from the face of the Earth after that. Nobody dares to mention it and yet there are tons of youtube clips of it that are filled with praise in the comments. People love the show, yet nobody can mention its name without social backlash from the woke left. Why is that? Well, let’s get into what the show even is to begin with.
Like every chick who dresses as Harley Quinn for Halloween, it has some severe issues that are treated as normal.
Postmodernism was already popular by the time we hit the 2000s, and by this time we have had postmodernist media for about 40 years. An entire generation worth of rejecting modernism. With this, we gained a lot of different media styles and new genres. The internet was growing into something capable of creating flash cartoons, movies like Fredy Got Fingered popularized shock comedy and neo dada, we started to have shock jocks take over the airwaves with uncensored satellite radio, and soap operas for the ladies were being replaced with reality TV.
Postmodernism allows for a blending of media and real life to create a hyper reality where we can’t see where media begins and reality ends. Media is part of our lives, all day every day, in this highly connected and social media focused postmodernist era. Even now, we wake up to our pop music alarm clock that holds notifications to our social media and the only way to escape media is to leave society and never read anything. That’s impossible for most of us, so we’re stuck in this hyper reality where we’re always watching others and we ourselves are always being watched. We’re at a point in history where people can become popular by just filming themselves making a goofy sound, vomiting, or taking off their clothes.
Usually it’s all three.
This should concern everyone, yet we tend to embrace the absurd reality that is postmodernism and reality tv. Despite common belief, reality TV began with Candid Camera, a show from 1948 where people would be filmed while being at the butt end of a prank. This kind of filming was a look into how real people provide real reactions to things when they aren’t expecting certain situations, which is actually in relation to the neorealism film movement that was inspired by the poetic realism french film movement. We enjoy seeing pranks being done because we get to see a real person provide real emotion and it’s no different than seeing a fight break out in real life, or seeing a car crash. It’s that train wreck mentality that keeps us glued to the scene as shit gets real.
Or was it the shit that glues us to the train as our real mentality gets wrecked?
It’s the same reason we love to see game shows and court shows and Jerry Springer. Add in some sexual exploitation like busty Ukranians and you have Naked Funny, which is a show people search for without caring about any words being said, since it’s a show with zero dialogue but plenty of mouth watering mammaries. Have the exploitation be where people are horrifically injured or do something sensational, and you have Jackass. Have a bunch of people pretend to be outraged and engage in scripted events while living in a single house, and you have The Real World.
That’s right: it’s a show with fake situations and it’s called The Real World.
This type of “reality” TV caused a massive issue in media because it allowed incredibly fake situations to pass as real, and there was no way to counter it because people were convinced it’s real. Just like professional wrestling, just like any show featuring a magician and a paid audience, just like any porno, there is a mix of real things and fake things that create this ambiguous state of hyper reality. Yes, a person can actually be hit by a chair or a sledgehammer, but there’s no way someone is going to be trying to win a match by holding their hand over the head of the sledgehammer and lightly tapping the other guy with it. Obviously, they don’t want to hit their co-worker, unless they’re in a porn shoot with a white woman. That’s when it’s fair game.
Postmodernism is a term that postmodernists try to avoid defining, because of the main doctrine of postmodernism: there is no such thing as a truth that can be verified by human experience. This means that anything being stated must be an opinion and thus everything being stated is completely disconnected from one another. A postmodernist is unable to make a clear and definitive statement that is true, because it goes against their doctrine. Everything must be vague and open-ended. Everyone has an equally valid interpretation. With that kind of mentality, art can be anything we want to call art. Rules are there to be broken, especially if they are rules of a broadcasting network. The R rating, the X rating, the unrated, these are products of postmodernism, due to the intention to break rules.
Subjectivity, blurring of genres, juxtaposition, playfulness, skepticism of a grand narrative, intertextuality, irony, pastiche, appropriation; all of these things are what makes postmodernism appealing to the masses. There is no desire to make something good, so the goal is to do something else, like be blindly entertaining or blindly propagandist. There is so much art before postmodernism and so much established through modernism, like science, that the goal of the postmodernist is to deconstruct all of that and make it feel like none of it matters.
Despite all of the deconstructionism and subversion that comes with postmodernism, media still has to appeal to an audience, and an audience reacts well to archetypes. We don’t know who to cheer for if we don’t know who is the heel and who is the good guy. There can’t be drama if there isn’t some red haired succubus or pampered shrew to throw a wrench in the circle of hotties. And at the same time, we can’t have all of them being that type of person, or else there’s nobody to root for. In the most ironic way possible, postmodernism is required to appeal to archetypes even more than modernism, due to the demand for audience retention and interaction.
Every reality show had to have at least one of every archetype, but remember: it’s totally real, everyone. It just so happened that there’s only one sneaky bitch and there’s only one cool guy and there’s only one innocent girl and there’s only one slacker. It was by random, totally not on purpose, and you’re crazy if you think producers are controlling the environment of these shows in any way. Same goes for dating shows like Next. It’s obvious that these people with their one liners and bad acting are being honest with all of us.
If you didn’t get it by now: I’m being sarcastic, these shows are faker than lady boy tits and the apologies from Bud Light for advertising with such fake tits. And yet, people can’t stop watching these pointless shows. Even I enjoy it, because of how dumb it is. A big part of my life after school was relaxing late at night with MTV and watching stupid reality tv shows. Even respectable ones like Cops were dumb because the entire show was about police officers finding people breaking the law. The entertainment comes from people ruining their day or their entire life with one dumb act after another.
You’re probably wondering: What does any of this have to do with Drawn Together?
Well, imagine all of these reality shows mixed into a cartoon and then each cartoon archetype is from a different type of cartoon. That’s Drawn Together, and the show gets more insane from that point on. The eras of cartoons are represented by the cast members who are to live in one house, as a satire of things like The Real World and as parody of cartoon archetypes. You have Princess Clara(a parody of the Disney Princess), Foxxy(a parody of 70s mystery solving cartoons like Scooby-doo), Xandir(a parody of 80s Nintendo and action cartoons), Wooldoor(a parody of 90s style Nickelodeon shows like Spongebob), Ling-Ling (a parody of anime like Pokemon), Spanky(a parody of internet cartoons from the early 2000s), Toot(a parody of 1930s black and white cartoons like Betty Boop and Popeye), and Captain Hero (a parody of 90s superhero cartoons like Batman Animated Series and Animated Superman).
These character types are all based on their known stereotypes when it comes to appearance, with their appearances never really mixing since these are all different types of cartoons from different styles. You never see a Pikachu with a Batman, or a human unmasker talk to a video game character, or a human princess from a fairy tale talk to a farting pig from the internet. These things never happen in their environment because these things don’t mix. Then the show puts all of these unrelatable characters into a single house to provide random challenges in the same way reality tv does in order to juxtapose the genres.
The art styles also are juxtaposed. Captain hero is drawn with a square jaw, while Toot is drawn incredibly circular and with a giant head. Woldor has giant white eyes while Foxxy only has pupils. Xandir and Claira are drawn rather similar, but even they have their differences with colors and the thickness of the outline. To the untrained eye, these are easy to miss, but to the artist, these are great homages to the very style something is drawn in. An important part to note is that these are all based on other things and are meant to represent them as symbols. There’s no reason for any of this, yet the show does it anyway.
This is what postmodernism is all about: doing things for the sake of doing it. Juxtaposition is a big part of postmodernism. Blending genres and mixing them around is a big part of postmodernism. Subverting tropes to claim originality is a big part of postmodernism. Non-sequitur is a big part of postmodernism. This entire show is one of the most postmodernist things you can find out there and I love everything about it.
You might be thinking “Is Erwin sick? He talks day and night about how postmodernism sucks and then says he loves Drawn Together. Is this an imposter?!”No, it’s me. I’m simply able to understand the purpose of the show, and I love the meta attempt in all of it: the show is a postmodernist attack on… postmodernism. Everything in the show is designed to be a massive middle finger to how postmodernism functions, by being the dysfunctional postmodernist mess it is. From how meaningless the challenges are, to how characters can never die all the way, to how 4th wall jokes stop the show, to how there is a mundane message tacked on at the very end. Everything in this show is a jab at postmodernism, but at the cost of the show’s own integrity.
In the story I’m working on, I would be required to present postmodernism in it so that I can critique it. But, if my entire story revolves around only that, then I would be presenting postmodernism the entire time, which means I can’t separate the thing that I’m attacking from my work, just how a story about the evils of racism would have to feature a racist. Postmodernists attacking postmodernists is the same as a racist saying “racism is fine, but only in the way I do it.”
But is all postmodernism really the same? The show is hated now, after all, right?
Yes, it’s hated now, because it(ironically) went against the grand narrative that postmodernists currently hold, but it was part of the narrative that was held during the early 2000s. Barely 20 years ago, less than half of a generation, millennials were being raised by exploitation. I know that the postmodernists hate it when I use this word to describe nearly all of postmodernism, but by definition, it’s exploitation. You can blame the 80s for this, because once home media became popular, we had movies that went straight to VHS and then later DVDs that were able to push the envelope.
That’s what postmodernism started as: a way to push the envelope.
South Park and Simpsons didn’t do things that were part of the status quo. They went against it to then become the status quo right after. In fact, there’s an amazing joke from the show Bevis and Butthead(another example of postmodernism) that captures this phenomena perfectly, where the two go to a radio show because they were the only caller, and then they influence the radio show by saying stuff sucks and stuff is stupid.
Their own stupidity and negativity was seen as a sort of punk culture by the viewers and so they demanded the radio host, who was angry at them, to do the same. And so, the next day, the radio host does exactly what he threw Bevis and Butthead out for doing. This complete hypocrisy that somehow there are rules, but they can be broken if the money is there, is something Drawn Together also tackled.
The entire first season was all about having pointless challenges with a character called Jew Producer, who was a parody of both Richie Rich and Donald Trump. How did they connect these 3? Easy: Donald Trump had a show called The Apprentice, Richie Rich was a cartoon, and a Jewish producer is a Hollywood cliche that's entirely true. A lot of Jewish people produce Hollywood stuff and TV shows. I don’t know why this is a controversial statement or why the left always gets insulted by that fact, but they constantly freak out the second someone mentions that someone like Harvey Winstein exists.
While I’m talking about controversies, Adam Carolla, the voice of Spanky, was blacklisted by Hollywood because he decided to do the cardinal sin of… demanding free speech in a country with free speech as a constitutional right. I know, how dare he! It shouldn’t surprise us that the former hippies who ran Hollywood on the backbone of free speech and demanded freedom of expression are now against… freedom of speech and freedom of expression. Meanwhile, Tara Strong, a proud jewish woman, voices a character like Princess Clara, with Princess Clara being a racist, homophobic, anti-semite who is also in a sexual relationship with her father.
So, let’s recap: a jewish woman is able to do the voice for such a terrible thing, yet an Italian male comedian is not able to ask for the acceptance to joke about such topics.
Why is this even a thing?Well, at first it really puzzled me, but like when we saw the left defending drag queen acts in front of children, it finally clicked. The problem in Hollywood isn’t that something terrible is said or written or put in a show. A white princess saying terrible things is normal to them, because that’s how they view white people. Their fear is that something might make a non-white person look bad. Something might make the LGBT look bad. There might be an “uncomfortable truth” revealed in a chain of unregulated jokes.
One of the most profitable postmodernist comedians around, Dave Chappelle, was canceled over making trans jokes, despite being a good friend of a trans person who killed themselves after… trans advocates hated the trans person due to being friends with Dave Chappelle. The woke are disgusting people, to put it bluntly. Zero people were harmed by Dave’s comedy, yet the woke harassing people has a death toll that’d make Pol Pot take notes on their efficiency.
So the difference between Tara and Adam is that Adam wants to make jokes about anything, while Tara is just doing her job and reading the script. The free thinker is the threat, while the obedient follower is not. That’s why Tara still gets jobs and Adam is off doing a podcast and somehow still making millions. I’m sure he’s wiping his tears with gold bullion over the thought of no longer being able to do voices for farting animated pigs.
But what exactly makes Drawn Together hated?
To be honest, I didn’t even know someone could hate the show until I was around 20 or so. Some online people I chatted with told me how offended they were by the show and I never understood what offended even meant until that era. I watched the show throughout my teen years without a care in the world. To me, it was another adult animated show that tried to do anything offensive and it was funny all around. Some of the subject matter, contains but is not limited to:

• Incest
• Self harm
• Suicide
• Homoerotic behavior
• Satanic rituals
• Genocide
• Mass murder
• Mass shootings
• Fat jokes
• Donkey shows
• Cannibalism
• Necrophilia
• Pedophila
• Mexican babies getting pregnant
• Asians and their inability to drive
• Black fathers leaving their kids
• Lewd conduct
• Shitting on a pizza
• A live action squirrel with big balls
• An old man with dirty balls
• And let’s not forget the idea that Clara’s vagina is a giant hentai tentacle monster

All of these things are put in the show to offend us, because the show intends on making people go “ew”. If the constant vomit, blood, shit, piss, burps, farts, cum, sweat, and queefs aren’t a dead give away of them trying to gross the audience out, I don’t know what is. The point of the show is to do exactly what the 90s and early 2000s is all about: doing stuff that is gross so you laugh at how gross it is. Nickelodeon was notorious for this intention of grossing people out, to the point where they would throw green slime around just for fun. As fun as it looks to be drenched in green slime like a Leprechaun bukkake, the goal is to make the audience say “ew… cool!” because that is a male oriented reaction.
And this is where we find the split in postmodernism. When postmodernism began as a means of subverting modernism and regulations, it quickly became a cesspool of creative INABILITY thanks to the woke taking over. We went from freedom of expression to being required to advocate, which is a detriment to comedy. Recently, we had a controversy over a show called Big Mouth, which was hated by the right for being considered pedophilic and indoctrination, because the characters were teenagers dealing with puberty monsters and were depicted as being sexualized.
This is one of the many areas the right is losing the battle on, because so many of them are trying to be Platoist or Mohism, meaning they want some kind of hyper utilitarian and aesthetic free environment due to a hatred of art. Plato believed that art was an “imitation”, that it was a “copy of a copy of a form”. It was a corruption and perversion of reality, thus he saw art as evil. Mo-Zi, a Chinese philosopher who shared a lot of his views, also saw art as a pointless distraction because it’s not the responsibility of the government. These kinds of “right wingers” are accidentally falling for philosophies that pave the way for socialism, so it’s hard to take their positions on art seriously when they can’t see how brainwashed their approach is.
I’m going to go with the Jews on this one and say that art is very important, and so is freedom to make art.
Big mouth is not a show that I will say is one of my favorites, but it’s nothing as how the right wanted to depict it as. Obviously these are just people who wanted the next Cuties outrage and they had a swing n’ a miss. The left, on the other hand, is able to say something like Drawn Together is offensive to them and so it must be canceled. And lo, we have the tumblr people unable to reblog about it, we have reddit radio silent about it, we have twitter people afraid to meme with it, but then it’s still prospering in places like youtube.
People want to watch it, but nobody is brave enough to talk about it in fear of being canceled.
The show is a Martyr in two ways:

1. It is a postmodernist work attacking postmodernism
2. It is a dead form of comedy due to both the left and the right trying to cancel things like it

I already went over the second point by talking about Big Mouth, but I will quickly reiterate: the right and the left want to cancel things that are offensive, but for different reasons. Something like Drawn Together would be hated by something like Daily Wire, and yet I am a conservative who loves the show. I understand that the show is making fun of stuff, I understand it’s gross out humor and pointless nonsense. I love that it’s aware of what it is, to the point where they had an episode where Spanky goes to see their #1 critic and it’s a Jewish, conservative, pro-life, born-again, overweight, Asian, homophobic, lesbian broad who cuts herself.
He then straight up tells her that she’s not their audience, so her opinion doesn’t matter on whether or not the show is good. And he’s right, if you aren’t the audience for something, why should anyone listen to your opinion on the thing you instantly don’t like? It’s like if I had an opinion about which sports team is better. I am 100% uninformed about anything sports related, and the only sport I ever willingly watched was professional wrestling. That’s a sport, right?
Either way, the show is aware that it’s offensive. It’s proud to be offensive. Each character has their own way of offending, both when it comes to a group and when it comes to art itself. This is when postmodernism kicks in and subversion is used to create a surreal environment suited for satire and parody.
As a quick reminder: Satire is when a subject is critiqued and parody is when a subject is used for a joke. An example of this would be where satire is when Scream uses movie tropes to figure out a murder and parody is when the alien from Signs pees with his finger in Scary Movie.
Princess Clara is the Disney princess. Usually a Disney princess seeks a prince to live happily ever after, and she is pure of heart. They subvert this by attaching a bit of reality to the word “princess” and have her in a sexual relationship with her father because princesses would sometimes do that to keep royalty in the family. She’s also a racist and Christian, because royalty in Europe was Christian and it’s “old fashion” for a rich white girl to be racist. Although they keep her desire to sing, the lyrics are still going to hold her views about people, so the humor comes in how she delivers terrible things with a cheery tone. Her character is meant to make fun of traditionalist people, all while using the Disney princess as a face.
With the way wokeness is going, I don’t see a difference between Clara and the current Disney princess now.
Foxxy Love is the Hanna-Barbera style mystery character who is meant to solve crimes, most likely inspired by Valerie Brown from Josie and the Pussycats. She suberts the role by causing crimes and being a degenerate all over. She is a slut, she acts ghetto, she constantly has abortions, you know the deal. This juxtaposition comes from the fact that Valerie is meant to be a hippie musician, and black women on reality TV are depicted as ghetto thanks to shows like Flavor of Love. And for those who don’t know, hippie musicians are usually promiscuous and incredibly loose, with zero regard for decency or sticking to one sex partner because they are all about second wave feminism.
Again, ironically the woke have caused this subversion to be their intentional norm for a lot of black female characters, only they see it as virtuous instead of comical.
Wooldoor Sockbat is the Nickelodeon style hyperactive loony toon who is meant to be both stupid and gullible. There’s not much subversion here with personality, but it’s all with how far he’s willing to go with his zany humor, such as randomly threatening to suck someone’s dick and having giant tits out of nowhere, which he will then squish into the camera while crying. He’s meant to be loud and random, just like Spongebob or Stimpy. However, with the way Spongebob has become after their first movie, the only thing separating Wooldoor from something like Spongebob is direct word usage.
Plus, Ren and Stimpy had their adult party cartoon reboot made by the creator, so doing something gay and entirely disturbing is nothing new for that kind of character. I still can’t believe that it came out in 2003. In fact, I can’t believe Ren and Stimpy was on Nickelodeon with the stuff they put in there. But, that’s the appeal of Wooldoor, because he does the stuff people have been doing with characters like him for years. I would even say he’s not much of a satire since he’s so close to the content he’s meant to make fun of.
Xandir Wifflebottom is the 80s action cartoon parody, as well as early video game cartoons. During the 80s and 90s, we had a lot of Nintendo shows like Legend of Zelda, which took after plot scripts like Transformers, GI Joe, He-Man, and other product placement shows during that time. Only a few episodes of Drawn Together make fun of these simple action plots, but this connection between the merchandise advertising shows and video game cartoons is important, since they are the same thing, and it’s a product of postmodernism. Shows during the 80s and 90s that were simply there to sell something with the show, whether it was a game or a toy, were part of this media and real life blur. His gayness comes from how people viewed both He-Man and Link, since Link was a feminine looking elf and He-Man was a muscular dude who didn’t wear a shirt when he’s fighting.
This one is kind of interesting since it touches on the subject of queer coding. The left is so desperate to feel like the LGBT is represented, they will declare something is gay because it “feels gay”. This feeling is based on whoever is attracted to a fictional character, so if gay men are attracted to He-Man, or if they like his outfit, then that means he’s totally gay. Link is a character who has sadly been considered a “gay icon” by websites like Polygon, all because the designers made him rather gender neutral in later games in order for him to appeal to a female fanbase that was growing. And when they say gender neutral, they mean “he’s not muscular and he has a pretty face”, similar to practically any 00s alt rock band memeber.
Apparently, having that and then having gay people make gay fanfics about the character instantly means the character is gay. The show made fun of this queer coding nonsense by making Xandir a raging homosexual that is constantly killed like a Mortal Kombat character.
Captain Hero, my favorite character, is the comic book show hero that we all know and love. He’s meant to save the day from evil villains, but they subvert his role by having him be entirely useless and usually the cause of mass destruction. He has superpowers, but he’s so stupid and useless that he doesn’t use them most of the time, like when he is immune to bullets but he still grabs a random woman to use her as a “hero shield” when getting shot at. His character makes fun of how postmodernist super heroes try to depict the classic hero as a terrible monster or some kind of morally warped anti-hero. This is due to how Batman went from whacky detective to psychotic nut job during the transition from the 60s to the 80s, thanks to influences like Alan Moore’s Watchman and Frank Miller’s The Dark Knight Returns. His character is more like a Superman, which the Bizzaro Superman comics have covered that kind of thing to make way for a super powered idiot who has sex with corpses.
Why does he have sex with dead bodies? Well, because he’s “alien” to us, the point of the joke is that he’s so super powered that he can do whatever he wants, and uses his powers to have sex with something that can’t fight back. Kind of a “he can have any woman he wants, but he would rather have sex with a rotten corpse” kind of thing. Or maybe it’s making fun of how Superman cares about Lois Lane even though she might as well be a rotten corpse to him, because she’s a human and he’s an alien. Either way, it covers a big problem we started to get in the 90s where superheroes were quickly becoming hyper violent assholes who do anything disgusting for the sake of shock value.
Ling-Ling is basically a Pikachu, but here he will battle with anything and cause gory deaths upon his opponent. The joke is that kid shows featuring these little monsters, like Pokemon and Digimon, will have zero blood, and yet the attacks they do are strong enough to cause giant explosions. Thankfully, these go past the typical Dorkly joke and Ling-Ling will also have jokes centered around being Asian and have a made up language that sounds Japanese because he says “kitowa” a lot.
Just like Xandir, Ling-Ling is treated like a punching bag by the others in nearly every episode, and I think it has to do with the video game relation, since Pokemon began as a video game and the show was there as a way of advertising the product. Plus, during the 00s, there was little respect for something like anime, no matter how much someone knew about the golden age of 80s anime.
Spanky Ham is something I’m not really sure what influenced him, but it’s said it might be an early flash cartoon called Evil Piggies. However, there is a flash cartoon from 1997 made by John K, the creator of Ren and Stimpy, called The Goddamn George Liquor Program, that seems more in line with Spanky’s scat fetish. Early internet cartoons usually had people’s faces done in a South Park style, where the mouth moved by cutting the bottom half off and moving that up and down. When I went on Newgrounds during that time, all I would see were stick figures, parodies of existing cartoons, and something like Ctrl+Alt+Del where the characters were drawn as humans in that typical web comic style. He might have also been inspired by Happy Tree Friends, which first came out in 1999, so the idea of cute animals dying randomly, and the crude humor of The Goddamn George Liquor Program might have caused a farting pig to come into fruition.
The joke is that he’s a pig who likes to drink and have sex, as well as be disgusting, but then somehow he’s also like Ren where he has schemes to make money. I forget if there is a word for this kind of character, but he’s the Squidward type who always gets harmed by his own greed. There is also a lot of Fritz the Cat in his character, which was an animated movie based on an underground comic about a cat who would go on sexual escapades. This “cartoon animal doing adult stuff” has been a joke since the 60s, and even Howard the Duck had issues with what Nostalgia Critic calls “duck boobies”. Speaking of adult ducks, there is even a show called Duckman that was made by the same company that made Rugrats.
People treat Bojak Horseman as this hip new thing when it’s simply part of a long line of animated foul mouth farm animals wearing suits.
Finally, Toot Braunstein is the representative of silent cartoons. Betty Boop was seen as sexy for being curvy, and the joke is that Toot is just plain fat and old, with her body hair and repulsiveness, as well as her tits always sagging to her cankles. She is always harming herself because of a self-esteem issue, caused by her weight and age, which is joined by an alcoholic problem due to her being from the roaring 20s. The joke is that she’s that girl in every reality TV show that is completely disgusting to look at, but she’ll see herself as a hot chick despite hitting the wall so hard that illegals can pour through the cracks. Plus, people believe Betty Boop was based on Clara Bow, who was a flapper “it girl” who suffered from hard drug use, schizophrenia, and was constantly rejected for being too fat.
Toot is the only one in the list who’s not directly a product of postmodernism, but there was a particular charm to rubber hose animation(gained its name for how limbs acted like rubber hoses) that continued onward to create things like Ren and Stimpy, Loony Toons, Tom and Jerry, and even some movies that tried to revive properties of the 30s. The Popeye movie is a great example as to how studios in the postmodernist era tried to desperately mix live action with cartoons, and same goes with Who Framed Roger Rabbit with how it was a movie that mixed live action with rubber hose animation.
Part 2

Sorry for spelling errors etc, im on mobile.
I'm a new grad with a 2.1 in criminology and politics from a decent uni. Before anyone says "it's because you did crim & pol!!", a lot of people from my course with the same amount of experience as me have already secured some decent analyst and investigation roles, or civil service. So it's not a bad degree, and it's from a good uni (not russell group, but I suspect it will be soon).
I've been applying to jobs I believe I'm qualified for, mostly 'entry level' or simple office work because i appreciate im just another grad. However, a lot of these jobs tend to turn out as call centres (they're not advertised that way, usually they present themselves as entry level positions). These are the only offers I'm really getting, and it's really depressing. I already have a part time job, and while it's only minimum wage, I'd rather work it than a call centre because of flexible hours (gives me more time to apply for jobs).
I have had some luck though. I had an interview and passed two technical stages for an analyst role, but failed the interview as the other candidates were stronger (people from my class mostly, especially those who were our class reps and likely just had better social skills). I also have a civil service interview on Monday, and I was reached out to by a finance company, but they have apparently ghosted me, despite being the ones to request I apply..
My CV is good, it's been checked and I've even taken a hireability course from my uni to help with my employability. my CV got nearly full marks and passed vmock, alongside my interviewing skill which was also tested and I got 85%, so a first, and only positive feedback. They said I seemed really friendly and enthusiastic etc.
I've worked mostly retail but have experience working in insurance as a temp. I wasn't lazy throughout uni either, I worked as treasurer for a uni society which I also founded, and we had great success. I also did volunteering as a sports coach with kids and young adults and have leadership experience as well as volunteering. I'm also multilingual (3 languages) and have awards to prove this, alongside awards for competing in sports (second in the UK for one in particular!)
I worked SO HARD to make myself employable by doing all this extra curricular stuff alongside working & uni, but it hasn't helped me at all obviously!
My next plan is to learn how to program (I have a few programmer friends and its something I used to do as a hobby, but not enough to put on my cv). I'm trying to just improve my skills to see if it will help at all.

I'm so sad. I just realised that I'm never gonna make it this month. I have high rent and extra costs and the last job I had payed really bad. I could have worked more, but I'm also tattoo apprentice and want to focus on that. I feel so stupid. Once the money comes in I do impulsive purchases and I just realised that my fixed charges are about the same as my salary, I had a little extra money this month (but also more expenses, the part I didnt realise) so I did some impulsive purchases. And now to get around I have to take more than halve of my savings, which I saved and worked for so long and hard. I wanted to spend that on something nice or important like when my bf and I move in together. Not rent, gas and groceries. With my new job I'm gonna make some more money so It wil be less tight of a budget but I still feel sad and dumb for not overseeing this even though I know it's probably adhd and also my upbringing, because growing up my biological parents ( I've been in foster care sinds 14) never told me anything about money, they always acted as if it was a secret.
Thank you for reading all of this

I am about to start the final year of my Bachelor's in Mechanical Engineering, after which I am expected to get a job. Currently, I have been away from home for about 5 days for a month long unpaid internship. Each and every moment I get time, I think about when this month is going to end and when I can go back home.
I get little peace in thinking that a month is going to be over pretty soon, because immediately I think about what I am going to do after my graduation. I always wanted to be an automotive engineer. There are no automotive industries near my city. In other words, if I wanted to do anything related to automobiles, I'd have to move.
I've gotten incredibly homesick. The regional language here is different than the one I speak at home. I do not understand this language. However, everyone here knows English and if I ask them to speak in English, they do. However, they're always talking in their language among themselves which is perfectly normal, but it makes me feel like the odd one out.
At this point, I'm even doubting my career choices. I'm not even sure I like Mechanical Engineering as much. I was good at coding and I liked it too. For some reason, I do not like the lifestyle of a software engineer. It feels as if there's no fun and you're constantly sitting in front of a screen all day.
All the interactions and a foreign place scare me a lot. Everything is so much easier back home where I've got people who have my back. Part of me thinks that it's going to be okay, this is the first time I'm away from home on my own. Maybe I'll learn to communicate better and arrange stuff for me. Maybe these homesick feelings can go away if I receive a stable income out of my job.
If I want to stay with my original career choice (which I really do), I have to move out eventually. I'll have to make new friends and adjust to that new environment. Currently, I really don't know how to go about finding a place to live in and making new friends.
Before this internship, I was under the impression that getting a job I love and that pays well will fix a lot of things. Now, it feels like getting a job will only be the start to a bunch of other real world problems.
I am really really scared.

AM WASTING MY TIME OR WORTH THE SACRIFICE?
Pre-apprentice here. I am a new to the field and with zero experience. how long being a pre-apprentice to become an apprentice? For me i hear some take 2-3 years to become a apprentice and i hear they cherry pick only to become apprentice after a year. The false promises i heard after taking ASVAB test about how being a pre-apprentice will likely put me on a faster list than those who don’t. Already been on a job site for 2 month and a half and its nothing but grunt work and sweeping a clean floor a thousandth time and i feel like i am learning nothing and wasting time but yet i feel there must be someone who is willing to teach. I did some minor fuck ups but warranted me back on the out-of-work list which i feel i did not deserve getting this at all like i said it was minor and did not know. Downside to all of this is that i am getting paid lower than minimum wages because of union membership fees. so taking a pay cut for this and learning nothing at all is hitting me hard. To those who had zero experience and zero knowledge who survived this did you guys survive this to apprentice or am i wasting my time? Any feedback or experience to this is welcomed and thanks.

I met my best friend when I was 16. I met him online WEVE never met in person. From 16 till nearly 25 we never argued we never fought nothing. About 2 months before I turned 25 my best friend sent me a video of a moose charging a family on their property. The family threw a bucket at the moose and I said ‘but why he said ‘if you lived somewhere like that you wouldn’t be asking’
I said full quote ‘I wouldn’t CHOOSE to live in an area like that. If I CHOSE to live where it was dangerous then that’s my fault’ and he spent two hours maybe more trying to tell me that I said people who are forced to live in dangerous areas choose it because that’s their only choice. We didn’t talk for a week.
On April 22, two days before my birthday me and him were talking. I asked him how work was he told me. He asked how my day was I told him. I asked how his night was before that day and he told me he went to bed at 10pm to which I responded with a joke I’ve said wince I was around 8 years old. I said ‘lmao what are you a mom?’ And for around 3 hours he was text yelling about how annoying I am and how being a mom isn’t hard and how there’s harder jobs then being a single mom and nobody cares about my kid and all I do is talk about myself.
Almost 9 years. I’be asked him multiple times how he felt about me, I’ve told him to please be honest and that if he doesn’t want to be friends to tell me. He always responded with such good things it made me cry. And then that.
He works in a hospital, he tried to use his schedule as an cause for how he was talking to me. He told me quote ‘I work 84 hours a week sorry if I’m a little pissy’ ?? I work 168 hours a week since July 2021 but I don’t take anything out on him.
The reason we ‘only talk about’ me is because I ask him how he is and what he’s doing and what his plans are and he gives me maybe 10 words back then asks about me. I don’t know how to hold back. If someone asks about me I tell them the truth. And if they ask for more detail I give it. I don’t understand how he’s trying to make HIM asking about me, me being a selfish bitch.
I ONLY talked to him so much about my toddler because he seemed to care and want to know how she was. And then 3 months before she turned 2 he told be he didn’t care about her and to stop telling him about things she’s learning. Not even just that he said NOBODY cares about her.
All I did was say on wouldnt choose to live somewhere dangerous and he tried to tell me I said it’s his fault his mom gave birth in a dangerous area so he got stabbed and robbed.
I said a joke I’ve been saying my whole life about ‘what are you a mom?’ And he assumed I was telling him he couldn’t be tired by 10pm because I have a toddler and I go to bed at 1am. Hell my mother has memory issues caused by a car accident and she knows I’ve been saying that joke my whole life but he tried to spin it as me turning to conversation back on myself. 62% of the time we’ve spoken about me since we met was because HE ASKED and now he’s mad that’s all we spoke about?? I TRIED to talk to him about anything and averything. The only thing he’s really talked to me about that’s his is his interest in Lego, Star Wars, and crocs.
Almost ten years. And I haven’t spoken to him in over a month.

I have a 3 year old son and 10 month twin girls. My aunt, in her 60’s, never married and no kids, who still lives at home with her mum.. asked me why I’m tired. Wednesdays my son does half day at school, my aunt lives near so I visit her and my nana for 3 hours with my twins for some dinner before I pick my son up again. Once when the girls were newborn I was complaining about how tired I am and I just need a break. She just looks me dead in the face and asks ‘what do you have to be so tired about’ I was speechless, and she wasn’t joking either. It just blows my mind that no one ever considers how hard this is. Another time my MIL had all 3 kids while I went to my nail appointment (I never really treat myself but I wanted to get my nails done before my holiday) and my aunt says it wasn’t fair leaving one person to look after 3 children on her own, baring in mind I do that ALL DAY EVERYDAY while my partner works 12 hour shifts! I did have one sweet moment yesterday on the bus home, girls wouldn’t nap in the pram while overly tired, trying to fumble in my bag under the pram for their milk while they screamed and my toddler trying to show me his new toy. I was super stressed but a old man walking off the bus leant down to my seat and told me I was a fantastic mum and doing a great job, it’s just what I needed to hear ❤️ sorry for the rant I just wished people realised how hard it is and how much of a struggle we go through trying to be the best parents to our children

basically, everything is terrible.
i am so incredibly upset that my mh ruined good things in my life. my depression/dpdr episode, a year ago, ruined my fucking life and self esteem. i still deal with it. i have always struggled with anxiety and mi but this particular decline in my mh was something that completely shattered me.
i went to college & graduated on the dean’s list. i was an aspiring preschool teacher. i was excelling in my career working with children. i had wonderful coworkers and bosses. i was so so proud of myself. my bosses loved me.
but trauma and burn out caught up to me & i couldn’t keep up with responsibilities of work and school. my bosses, initially supportive, stopped believing in me. i’m only 23 and burnt out. i was sobbing in my bosses office and getting asked if i am okay. so embarrassing. i dissociated everyday for months- even at work. i took a leave of absence but it wasn’t enough.
god, it all feels like such a huge loss having to leave a job i very much loved. i was financially stable, too.
i’m a very broken, hollow version of myself. i can barely keep conversation and sleep is 95% of what i do daily- it’s the only thing that feels good. i love my boyfriend but i feel emotionally disconnected. i feel like he will leave me if i continue to be mentally ill and the biggest disappointment.
my mother is a functioning alcoholic- i still live at home and witnessing this is so exhausting and doesn’t exactly give someone like me, hope.
i started a new job with the company that my mom works for & i feel like i’m going to disappoint her. my job is talking to disabled people and i can barely make normal conversation. i am disabled at this point. i took the job because my mom was upset i was unemployed. i tried other jobs but i either didn’t get chosen after the interviews (i was dissociated), fired, didn’t show up for the interview, or walked out after a few days. it felt physically impossible to be a normal, sociable, alert person and worker.
i was removed from my university yesterday for inactivity. i’m in crippling debt from impulsive credit card usage. i have $5 to my name. my car payment is nearly 3 months overdue. if my car gets repoed, i’ll lose it.
i’m a lazy, crybaby, disappointment, mentally ill, user. my body and mind are broken. yes, i went through trauma & it was 5 years ago but i can’t fucking move on like everyone else. i did therapy, medication and i need more therapy but i’m broke. i swear some medications are rotting my brain.
thoughts of dying are absolutely raging and i don’t have anyone to talk to rn. It feels like there is no help in the world. i don’t want to participate in life. I don’t think I’m going to make it.

basically, everything is terrible. i am so incredibly upset that my mh ruined good things in my life. my dpdr episode, a year ago, that lasted 5 months, ruined my fucking life and self esteem. i have always struggled with anxiety and mi but this (dpdr) was something that completely shattered me.
i went to college & graduated on the dean’s list. i was an aspiring preschool teacher. i was excelling in my career working with children. i had wonderful coworkers and bosses. i was so so proud of myself. my bosses loved me.
but trauma and burn out caught up to me & i couldn’t keep up with responsibilities of work and school. my bosses, initially supportive, stopped believing in me. i’m only 23 and burnt out. i was sobbing in my bosses office and getting asked if i am okay. i dissociated everyday for months- even at work. i took a leave of absence but it wasn’t enough.
god, it all feels like such a huge loss having to leave a job i very much loved. i was financially stable.
i’m a very broken, hollow version of myself. i can barely keep conversation and sleep is 95% of what i do daily- it’s the only thing that feels good. i love my boyfriend but i feel emotionally disconnected. i feel like he will leave me if i continue to be mentally ill. my mother is an alcoholic, i still live at home and witnessing this is so exhausting.
i started a new job with the company that my mom works with & i feel like i’m going to disappoint her. my job is talking to disabled people and i can barely make normal conversation. i took the job because my mom was upset i was unemployed. i tried other jobs but i either didn’t get chosen after the interviews (i was dissociated), fired, didn’t show up for the interview, or walked out after a few days. it felt physically impossible to be a normal, sociable, alert person and worker.
i was removed from my university yesterday for inactivity. i’m in crippling debt from impulsive credit card usage. i have $5 to my name. my car payment is nearly 3 months overdue. if my car gets repoed, i’ll lose it.
i’m a lazy, crybaby, mentally ill, user. my body and mind are broken. yes, i went through trauma & it was 5 years ago but i can’t fucking move on like everyone else. i did therapy, medication and i need more therapy but i’m broke.
thoughts of dying are absolutely raging and i don’t have anyone to talk to rn. It feels like there is no help in the world.

Context: 76 days NC, a year-long relationship (as in "two people see each other often and communicate a lot") half of which was a situationship with an attempt of "Relationship" which lasted about two months. (Writing it out made me realize how utterly complicated that was).
So, I just want to say, that now, when I'm nearing 11 weeks past BU it seems to get better. My heart doesn't feel as heavy and my overall condition improved. Aside from time doing its thing, here is what I have done in no particular order:

• Exercise. Some people say to exercise like a demon. I guess there's some merit to it, but I had no time, no desire, no money and no opportunity to get into gym obsession. I just downloaded a free exercise app for men and stuck to it (15 minutes a day, every day for 37 days with exceptions on ones when app tells me to rest). Combined with lessened food and alcohol intake it helped me to improve my looks enough for me to notice, I feel stronger and physically more capable.
• Walking. My job makes it easy to walk 10000 steps a day and, when I have the time on my days off, I try to walk as much. Walking in nature is cool, especially now, when it's finally summer.
• Reading. Both fiction and non-fiction helped me to take my mind off BU. Non-fiction strengthens the mind, fiction heals the heart. And I just love reading, so it also helped me relax.
• Meditation. 50 days straight. Improved my ability to just be. I actually can focus on something other than my thoughts and feelings for quite some time now.
• Talking to friends. Can't stress this enough: having someone to share your thoughts and feelings with is tremendously helpful. Don't play it cool, don't feel ashamed - just talk to someone who cares. For me, it isn't even as much about looking for advice or something, letting someone in on my pain helps as is.
• Doing chores and "keeping it together". That is a tough one - my mind is occupied by thoughts, and it takes effort to return to day-to-day things. But having a paycheck, clean clothes and a clean apartment is totally worth it.
• Allowing my self to think and feel whatever. Is it sadness? Get in. Anger? Sure. Do I miss her? Okay. Am I hurt? Welcome. Am I hopeful? Great, let me experience it. One step at a time, may whatever come - I'll be there for myself. I'm in control, and none of my feelings and urges warrant necessity of any kind of action. (Guess meditation really helped with that).
• Some therapy. Sadly, due to my financial struggles I can't afford counseling every week or, to be fair, on any consistent basis. It'll change for the better in a couple of weeks, though. Anyway, those hours I had were tremendously helpful. My mind was and kind of is a mess, so having someone else's mind to help mine to get mended back together is extremely useful.
• Some journaling. Classical one, greatfulness and letters never send.
• Writing poetry. Having a creative outlet is helpful.
• Partying every once in a while. We all need to relax some times.
• Thinking in general. I know that a lot of us struggle with ruminating and "what if" kinds of thoughts, but they are there for a reason: as messy is it is, your mind is trying to make sense of the situation and, while there's a lot of "useless" chaff, some of it actually adapts whole of you to a new post BU reality. For me, anyway, it did.
• Taking responsibility and forgiving myself. There was a lot of things I could have done differently. There's a lot of things I could have communicate better. There's a lot of choices I've made that were based only on a part of myself and not the whole of me. There was a lot of doubts I could've voiced. A lot of anger pent up. A lot of withholding on my part. I'm sorry, but I had my reasons, and did my best at the time. Next time when life will turn its ugly side on me I'll be that bit more prepared.
• Reading this sub. It helps to see that I'm not the only one struggling.

By no means, I'm over it: any accidental reminder of her leads to feelings of pretty extreme anxiety. I guess I'll keep eliminating those and keep reframing my memories so it no longer hurts.
I suppose, your mileage may vary, but to anyone who's not eleven weeks in yet: it just might get better a little bit this soon.
Thank you and carry on! We got what it takes!

Husband(49M) and I (46F) used to make a great team, but it's gone to hell in a hand basket over the last few years. Recently he informed me that I was expected to do 100% for our daughter(9) all the cleaning and inside the house chores. He takes the trash out, mows the lawn/winter shoveling (unless he is out of town- and I think he checked the weatheplanned his away weeks so I had to clear the driveway nearly every storm this year- and the grass hasntbbeen mowed this season) He told me that we had agreed when I took my part-time (24-32hrs/week) job 2 years ago, that our daughter wouldn't be in daycare and I could do things at home. I missed the fact that he was going to stop doing ANYTHING around the house. I refuse to schedule his appointments or do his laundry. His schedule is erratic and he is too picky on the order his shirts get hung up in the closet. He also pays all the household bills. But if I ask him to grab a gallon of milk at the store on the way home you would think I sent him on a mission for a rare gem.
Everyday I get up at 6:30 with our daughter to get her ready for school. He rolls out of bed just after 7. I make sure she is fed, has snack, homework, book, water, shoes etc for school and we are out the door at 7:40. I drop her off at school, drive to the post office for work (15 min) and head to the office. I have to leave work by 2:30 to be home before the bus. Then it's snack, homework, maybe 1 hr of down time before supper prep, baths, and bedtime prep. daughter has severe anxiety and I sit with her until she fLls asleep. Somewhere between 4 and 6 he announces he is done with work (unless he gets a phone call) and he sits in his recliner and turns on the TV. I can't get him to see that my being home with our daughter after school.does not give me more extra rime in my day. He refuses to help.with cooking, and complains that he eats out too much so doesn't want takeout. He doesn't understand why there are always dirty dishes in the sink, or why I haven't had the chance to vacuum or put laundry away. I have to schedule all the appointments for my daughter. I have to follow up with the school. I plan meals and buy the groceries. I am trying to get a summer schedule set, and he refuses to sit with me and look at the calendar- because he doesn't know where he will need to be for work. I am just so tired.
2 years ago I started a new job. Super flexibility, good pay, part-time 24-32 hours a week. I can WFH or at the office, any hours, I just need to make sure the job is done. Hubby is a sales manager, he goes to his customers/ spends time with employees and finishes his paperwork/communication from home (his desk is between our living room and dining areas). Every 3 weeks or so he is out of town Monday-Thursday. His work is full time plus. He will always answer his work calls, no matter the time, or what activity the family is doing. 2 or 3 times a year he travels out of state for Corporate events- training and fun events, 1 week a year he has a guys vacation (hunting trip). 3 years ago I was working a full-time job (32 hours a week, our daughter (now 9) was in full time daycare, my disabled mom was living with us, she had helpers that regularly came to the house. Hubby had the same job, but was not managing others yet.