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Hello! Im porting kenshi into a dnd TTRPG(table top role playing game) to play with my friends, I made a post about it earlier where another redditor said I should post a log of some sort, which is what I will be doing. The first logs will be about homebrew systems I have put in place to make the game more kenshi-like, after those few are done I will move onto V.2s, custom settings, playtest notes, items, custom stat blocks, and hopefully more. So anyway, here is Combat V.1, Id love to hear all of your ideas, questions, and suggestions on all of my logs.
Damage - Damage is calculated by the weapons damage dice, the condition of the weapon, and the correlated stat with the weapon. You get an automatic +# to attack and damage depending on the condition and corralated stat, then you roll the weapons hit dice. Some weapons are just better than others, but some weapons can be concealed, or duel weilded. A chart of weapons, conditions, and correlated stats can be found below:
Blunt Weapons - wisdom Hackers - Constitution
Heavy Weapons - Strength
Katanas - Dexterity
Polearms - Intelligence
Sabres - Charisma
Crossbows - Wis+Int
Unknown - Rusted Blades
Rusted Junk +1
Rusting Blade +2
Catun Blademaster - Ancient Blades
Mid-Grade Salvage +4
Old Refitted Blade +5
Refitted Balde +6
Deadcat Butcher - Largest Current Weapon Manufacturers in the world Deadcat No. 1 +8
Deadcat No. 2 +9
Deadcat No. 3 +10
Skeleton Smiths - Weapons made by skeletons from Black Desert City
MkI +12
MkII +13
MkIII +14
Edgewalker - Ancient smiths whose work is unrivaled by any crafters today
Edge Type 1 +16
Edge Type 2 +17
Edge Type 3 +18
Cross - ancient blademaker of legendary weapons that never rust or need sharpening
Meitou +20
Crossbows work differently:
Prototype +1
Shoddy +2
Standard +4
High +8
Specialist +15
Masterwork +20
Blunt
• Heavy Jitte 2d6
• Iron Club 1d4
• Iron Stick (just condition + stats)
• Jitte 1d6
• Outlander Club(mercenary club) 2d4
• Spiked Club 1d8
Hakcers
• Combat Cleaver 1d4
• Flesh Cleaver 1d6
• Long Cleaver 2d6
• Moon Cleaver 1d8
• Paladains Cross 2d4
• Short Cleaver (just condition + stats)
Heavy
• Plank 1d12
• Falling Sun 2d12
• Fragment Axe 1d20
Katanas
• Gaurdless Katana 1d8
• Katana 1d6
• Ninja Blade 1d4
• Nodachi 2d6
• Topper 2d4
• Wazkazahi (just condition + stats)
Polearms
• Heavy Polearm 2d6
• Naginata 1d4
• Naginata Katana 1d6
• Polearm 1d8
• Staff (just condition + stats)
Sabres
• Desert Sabre 2d6
• Forgein Sabre 1d6
• Holed Sabre 1d8
• Horse Chopper 1d4
• Small Sabre (just condition + stats)
• Ringed Sabre 2d8
Crossbows
• Junkbow 1d4
• Toothpick 1d6
• Ranger 1d8
• Spring Bat 1d10
• Deadcat Bow Mk1 2d6
• Deadcat Bow Mk2 2d8
• Eagles Cross 2d10
Health Points - Every Limb has its own HP, depending on your species, based on your constitution stat and level is when the limb will be rended useless or when you will pass out. If a limb reaches below the negative number of that limbs HP it falls off, and you will have to get a replacement. If the stomach, chest, or head part reaches below fhe negitive number of its HP you die.
Targeting a limb - if you target a limb you will hit it, but you get a -2 to general AC on your next turn. If you dont target a limb specifically its up to the percentile dice with chest being 20%, stomach being 20% head being 10%, each arm being 10% each and each leg being 10% each, and the extra 10% is you hit the part with the lowest HP as of that round

With his mother dead and his cultist family members out to ruin his life, getting abducted by alien slavers is actually an improvement for Corey Vash. A quick and chaotic escape attempt only succeeds thanks to an unintentional rescue from the impressively skilled and infrequently sober bounty hunters aboard the Hard Luck Hermit. With no clue about how to survive in space and nothing to return to on Earth, Corey joins the crew in their efforts to make a quick buck, try new drinks, and figure out who the hell keeps trying to kill them.
[First Chapter][Previous Chapter][Cover Art][Patreon]
“Alright, our little gun show just got a hell of a lot more complicated,” Kamak said. Zero-G combat was a pain in the ass even for people who’d been specially trained, and as far as Kamak knew, that only applied to Farsus. He and Doprel had been in a handful of zero gravity fights, but he was less than confident in his skills and knew that Doprel felt the same.
“I’m not confident in our ability to manage this combat scenario,” Farsus said. “Melee combat is generally more viable in zero gravity environments, and we cannot hope to beat the Doccan in melee range.”
“On the other hand, lot of handholds here on this ship,” Corey said. He grabbed an exposed mechanical element, one of many jutting from the patchwork halls of the ship, and latched himself in place. It wasn’t a perfect solution, but they had places to brace themselves to avoid the zero-gravity recoil problem. To Vo braced her foot against an oddly welded ridge in the ship’s hull and kept her gun up.
“Could we leave this vessel disabled and wait for the Doccan to send reinforcements?”
“We’ve only got enough disable rounds for one more ship, and the Doccan always escalate linearly,” Doprel said. “They’ll send two, maybe three next time.”
“It’s a little messier than anticipated, but this is still our best shot,” Kamak said. “Guns up.”
The team shouldered their weapons and started kicking off the walls, drifting down the darkened halls of the ship. The vessel had enough of an auxiliary power system to keep some emergency lights on, but even those were intermittent, with many bulbs burnt out by the Doccan’s lack of interest in repairing such a negligible function. They did not feel fear, much less fear of the dark.
Corey, on the other hand, was feeling a lot of fear. His casual interest in sci-fi films had done him a lot of good out here in space so far, but now it was starting to backfire. He’d watched Alien one too many times to be comfortable drifting around the dead silence of this spaceship. He tried to remind himself that there were no xenomorphs here. The only aliens he had to worry about were nigh-unkillable super strong emotionless behemoths.
In retrospect, that was worse, and Corey decided to start thinking about literally anything else just in time to hear something go click.
A three round burst of plasma fire soared down the hall, briefly illuminating the length of it in green fire. One of the bolts caught Farsus on his broad chest, but his armor mostly negated the damage. Kamak returned fire, sending a stream of bullets up the hall, and Kamak himself careening the other way. In his haste to return fire, he’d forgotten to brace himself. The rest of his fireteam made no such mistakes.
With his back to a wall, Corey turned his gun towards the Doccan and took aim. There were two of them, both even larger than Doprel, and wearing patchwork armor to boot. That was an unpleasant development.
“Take out the guns first,” Farsus shouted. The Doccan themselves were durable and heavily armored, but their guns were as fragile as any other weapon in the galaxy. Corey took aim and peppered the Doccan’s limbs with a spray of gunfire. One of the two had the wherewithal to clutch their gun to their side, letting their arm absorb the brunt of the gunfire, but the other kept trying to return fire even as a bullet finally hit home. The metal slug cracked through the plasma repeater’s energy chamber, and the weapon started to vent green fire as the energy cell leaked.
With his weapon damaged, the Doccan took the next logical step and launched himself at his opponents, massive arms raised and ready to strike. The crew took advantage of the zero gravity recoil and let go of their handholds in the wall, then fired at the approaching Doccan. The recoil propelled them away as bullets peppered its thick hide. With no gravity to make it flow outwards naturally, the strange fluid layer beneath the skin of the Doccan started to leak out in blobs of oozing blue.
The floating globs splashed into dozens of tiny droplets as Doprel met his kin coming the other way. The divided drops then scattered in every direction as the shockwave of their colossal impact traveled outwards. Another spray of blue fluid followed shortly after as Doprel dug his fingers into a patch of bullet holes and tore a massive chunk out of the Doccan’s exterior carapace.
“Doprel! Give me an angle on the face!”
With a quick grunt of acknowledgment, Doprel spun around and put the Doccan he was grappling in a headlock. He kept his arms wide and his face behind the Doccan’s back as Kamak took aim at the Doccan’s head and fired. A quick round of bullets tore through the air, a few managing to find purchase in the Doccan’s face, tearing out one of its eyes and a few chunks of mandible. The floating drops of blue liquid pouring out of the broken head were soon joined by a thin flow of black bile -the real lifeblood of the Doccan.
“Not going to be interrogating that one,” Kamak said. “Focus fire and take out his friend!”
Kamak drifted forward and grabbed on to the broken body of the dead Doccan, using it as cover as the hail of bullets continued. Under fire from five sources at once, the Doccan’s defeat was inevitable yet worryingly slow. Corey kept his rifle focused on the joint of its arm for a solid thirty seconds of sustained fire, but it didn’t even drop its gun until the arm was only attached by a few strands of tattered, fibrous “muscle”. Even at that point, the Doccan simply switched hands and continued firing until Farsus blew a big enough chunk of its head off that it stopped moving entirely. Doprel walked up and ripped its other arm off just to be sure, while Kamak took a final few potshots at the head of the other one.
“Bastard’s aren’t afraid to play dead,” Kamak said. “Especially when they know they’re at a disadvantage.”
“Good news is, this means there’s probably just two more,” Doprel said. “If we were dealing with multiple groups there’d have been a full crew of four after us.”
“Best news I’ve gotten all week,” Kamak said. “Now where are the others…”
“We are located in the cockpit.”
Five guns pointed in five different directions as the voice boomed out from a PA system.
“What’s going on?”
“You have stated an intent to interrogate a living subject, and have proven your ability to defeat two or less Doccan in combat,” the monotone voice proclaimed. “There is no further purpose to violent resistance.”
“I see,” Kamak said. They really were logical. “We’ll be right there. Guns up, of course. I’m not dumb enough to not see a trap.”
“We lack the resources to commit to such a deception.”
That did nothing to ease Kamak’s suspicion, for reasons the Doccan could not at all understand. He, Doprel, and Farsus kept their guns up as they head upwards, towards the cockpit of the makeshift vessel. Corey was not far behind, until he realized To Vo La Su was quite far behind. She was bouncing slowly around the hall, trying to dodge floating globs of Doccan ichor—and a few chunks of the Doccan themselves.
“You’ve just got to accept you’re going to get messy and move through it,” Corey said. “The laundry machine on the Hermit is surprisingly good.”
“I don’t have that many clothes to start with,” To Vo mumbled. Due to the impromptu circumstances of her “recruitment” To Vo had the clothes she’d been wearing and a few spare outfits Tooley had been willing to throw at her—most of which fit poorly and had suspicious stains already. “But that is not my issue. I do not- there is a certain amount of- I can’t-”
“To Vo?”
The former transit authority tightened her grip on a gun she was entirely unsuited to carry and took a deep breath. One of the globs of Doccan ichor drifted worryingly close to her face, and she backed away.
“I didn’t want to do something like this again.”
“Again?”
To Vo was naturally small, but she still found a way to shrink in on herself.
“The world I come from was harsh,” To Vo said. “We did harsh things to live. All of us.”
A few chunks of gore drifted by Corey’s head. He knew better than to ask what she meant.
“Yeah. Look, I get it, but, these guys came after us because they thought we were a defenseless bunch of stranded travelers, right? You think they brought all that firepower to escort a bunch of lost souls back to safety, give them a nice pat on the back and a snack for the road? If we’d actually been lost travelers, we’d be dead. And eaten, quite possibly.”
“But we aren’t travelers, and now they’re dead,” To Vo said, pointing out the drifting Doprel corpses as she spoke. “How can this be right?”
“Look, To Vo, nothing’s ever completely ‘right’. Even when you’re purely trying to help someone, who’s to say they ‘deserve’ it, or that there’s not someone else who needs the help more and isn’t getting it?” Corey asked. “You’re never one-hundred percent in the right. Sure, maybe we’re a lot closer to that line between good and bad than we could be, but I think we’re still on the good side of things.”
“And what happens when you’re not?”
Corey didn’t have an answer for that question. Luckily for him, he didn’t get the chance to try.
“Would you two stop fucking moralizing and back us up? This is still a combat zone!”
The ever obedient To Vo La Su was the first to grab her gun and kick off towards the cockpit, heedless of the gore she had to splash through on the way. Corey followed closely behind her, secretly quite happy to let her absorb all the floating ichor instead of him.
***
As it turned out, the Doccan were sincere in their desire to surrender. That left only one dilemma to resolve.
“So. Awkward issue,” Kamak said. “We’ve only got enough restraints for one of you.”
“We will offer no resistance,” one of the Doccan said.
“Oh sure, for now. Until we get attacked by someone else, or we all turn around at once, or you decide you might have a good opportunity.”
“This point is sound,” the Doccan admitted.
“Which one of you knows more about the recent movements in people fighting you guys, and why your people blew up the Bang Gate?”
“I am more knowledgeable on all military matters,” the Doccan on the left said. Kamak pointed to the one on the right.
“And you agree with that sentiment?”
“Yes. However, your inquiries might require a greater knowledge base. I am in charge of monitoring the social habits of various Doccan, and may possess relevant information.”
The other Doccan had barely finished speaking when Kamak shoved the barrel of his gun in their mandibles and pulled the trigger. A burst of rounds tore through their cranium and the Doccan fell over dead. The only surviving Doccan did not even react as his comrade collapsed. As black blood started to drift through the air, Corey very deliberately avoided To Vo’s gaze.
“Not particularly interested in your social media. Alright, Doprel, tie the other one up,” Kamak said. “And you. Got time for questions?”
“I will accede to any line of questioning that does not actively endanger the Doccan species.”
“Great! What’s your name, champ?”
“Doprel.”
Doprel looked up and over the other Doprel’s shoulders.
“Doprel, why is our new friend also Doprel?”
“It’s...actually a term for the working class of Doccan’s,” Doprel said. “I didn’t have any other name, and by the time I realized what was going on it had sort of stuck, so...yeah.”
“Do you want a better name?”
“No, no, like I said, it’s stuck now, no sense changing it,” Doprel said. “Not like we hang out with other Doccan enough for it to be confusing.”
“On that note, for the purposes of this conversation, you are Junior,” Kamak said. The newly christened Junior did not object to this designation, so Kamak assumed he accepted it. “What do you know about why the Doccan attacked the Bang Gate?”
“We were recently informed that new stresses upon intergalactic shipping routes would place additional importance on our galaxy as a trade hub,” Junior said. “Your Galactic Council endures our presence and our attacks on your shipping route as acceptable losses. If this galaxy was to become more important on a galactic scale, they would feel more pressure to protect it, and therefore take more aggressive actions against the Doccan species. A pre-emptive strike to lessen the utility of our home as a trade route mitigates this risk of escalating conflict.”
“And blowing up a fucking Bang Gate isn’t an escalation?”
“The gateway is destroyed. Retaliatory attacks achieve nothing. Your Council has nothing to gain from further conflict.”
“What if they’re worried you’ll blow up another fucking gate, Junior?”
“The measured presence of other species in this galaxy ultimately benefits us by providing resources we would be otherwise unable to acquire,” Junior said. “We have no reason to completely close ourselves off.”
“You guys have a lot of work to do on understanding other species,” Kamak said.
“Typical warfare does not stop when one side considers it merely ‘convenient’,” Farsus said. “If the Galactic Council decides on hostilities, they will not stop until they possess a considerable advantage over you.”
“By our appraisal they already possess a significant advantage,” Junior said. “However, if I survive our conversation, I will pass on your appraisal of the situation to the homeworld.”
“Jury’s still out on your survival. Tell us this and improve your odds: Who told you about all this shipping route bullshit?”
“It was [TRANSLATION ERROR].”
Kamak rubbed the sore spot where his translator chip was implanted and tried again.
“Say again?”
“We were informed of these developments by a [TRANSLATION ERROR].”
“Alright, not going for a third try here,” Kamak said. Whenever the translation software ran through the full suite of languages it knew, it started to overheat a little, and Kamak didn’t want a hotspot in his skull. “Doprel, I thought you gave us the whole language?”
“I did!”
“If I may theorize,” Farsus said. “To my understanding, the Doccan are a very literal people. Junior, when your people are faced with a new entity or concept, do you invent a new word for it?”
“When it is the most convenient course of action, yes,” Junior said. “Oftentimes compound words are formed. Your own people are referred to as ‘Red-Large-No Carapace’.”
“An apt descriptor,” Farsus said. “So we can assume whatever introduced these concepts to the Doccan, it was something they first encountered after Doprel’s departure, and something so unique it prompted the creation of a new word.”
“Fun times,” Kamak grumbled. “Junior, can you describe the thing whose name we can’t understand?”
“I have never seen it.”
“Peachy. What do you know about it?”
“It displayed enough intelligence that our central command council took its provided information seriously.”
“And did your central command stop to think about whether this word-we-can’t-understand had any ulterior motives?”
“Non-Doccan rarely approach the Doccan without ulterior motive,” Junior said. Had he any understanding of irony as a concept, he might’ve pointed out his current situation. “It was decided that the threat presented was legitimate enough to act without regard to possible external agendas from the [TRANSLATION ERROR].”
“Please stop saying that,” Corey whined.
“I am unaware of any reason to do so beyond your physical movements,” Junior said. To him, the flinching Corey did every time he said the word was just a strange muscle spasm, as the average Doccan did not experience pain.
“Just don’t fucking say it. Back to the point, you should know that whoever or whatever brought this stuff to you, they’re using you and your actions as a smokescreen to get away with their own shit,” Kamak said. “They’re pushing to change trade routes and pressure new parts of the galaxy. Maybe the threat is legitimate, but it is only legitimate because they are doing what they’re doing.”
“Noted.”
Junior’s quiet acceptance of the dramatic twist unsettled Kamak more than he’d like to admit. Maybe it was just because he’d lived through so many dramatic twists and turns lately, but he felt like that warranted more of a reaction. The emotionless Doccan accepted every new twist of fate the way a calculator would accept a new number plugged into a math problem.
“So...if we let you live, you’re going to tell all this to your planetary council or whatever?”
“New data will be considered.”
“Fan-fucking-tastic, I guess. Anyone else got questions for Big Blue Number Two?”
“I’ve got one,” Corey said. “How long ago did that weird thing bring you guys all this info?”
“Eighteen Doccan days ago.”
“That comes out to a few months, with everything converted,” Doprel said. The Doccan homeworld had a very slow rotation period.
“Once again putting it well before our run-in with that purple ship,” Corey said. “So we really did just get caught up in a plot that was already going on.”
“If that’s supposed to make me feel better, it doesn’t,” Kamak said.
“It might be useful, at least,” Corey mumbled.
“Final call for questions,” Kamak said. “I want to get out of this floating piece of crap.”
“Just the one,” Doprel said. “If what we’ve said is true, and the Doccan find out they’ve been manipulated into making their own situation worse...what will they do about it?”
“It is impossible to make an assessment of the situation without a consensus of at least one Doccan hive,” Junior said. “If not the full planetary council.”
“Well what would you, personally, do?”
“Obey the consensus of the hive or council.”
“Let’s say there’s no hive or council-”
“If all hives and the council have been obliterated, my priority must be to repopulate the Doccan species first and foremost, ignoring tertiary matters such as this.”
“Doprel,” Kamak said. “Whatever you’re looking for, you’re not going to get.”
“Yeah. Got it.”
Doprel’s sullen silence infected the rest of them, and their interrogation was put on pause for a moment.
“Has your interrogation ended?”
“What?”
“You have asked for final questions and are now silent. Is your interrogation finished?”
“Pretty much,” Kamak said. They’d learned this particular Doccan was next to useless, so they didn’t have much reason to continue. “You got a last request?”
“In some form. Do you intend to assault, kill, or otherwise impede the entity you believe has manipulated the Doccan?”
“That’s the plan, yeah,” Kamak said. “Speaking of assaulting or killing-”
Kamak hefted his heavy rifle once again.
“Cooperation will be beneficial,” Junior said. “Remove my restraints so that I may assist.”
“Oh, yes, sure, that sounds like a great idea,” Kamak said. “Assist us with what?”
“Surviving.”
Something Junior wouldn’t be doing much longer, if Kamak had anything to say about it. It was hard to read a Doccan, but he knew a bluff when he saw it. The captain raised his gun, and had it shoved down again by Doprel.
“Kamak.”
In any other situation, Doprel would’ve been on board with calling the bluff, but the Doccan didn’t bluff often. Kamak reluctantly accepted Doprel’s caution and played his part.
“Okay, this is me taking the bait,” Kamak said. “You’re going to help us survive what?”
“The patrolling warship on route to this location,” Junior said. “My willingness to discuss important information with you was a stalling tactic. We sent a distress ping shortly after you boarded.”
While Kamak started swearing, Farsus did the slightly more sensible thing. He hopped on the comms and turned back towards the Hermit.
‘Tooley, ping the long range scanners.”
“Okay. We got...huh,” Tooley said. It took a moment for the full details to come in, but even the most basic scan functions couldn’t miss the vessel coming their way. “That is a big one. I think that might be a Corrhulk.”
“They’ve kept a fucking Corrhulk flying for the past century?”
“What exactly is a Corrhulk?” Corey asked. He felt context was very important.
“It’s big and it’s got a lot of guns,” Kamak snapped. The Corrhulk was one of the last true warships the intergalactic community had mass-produced. Nowadays what few heavy cruisers existed were mostly just carriers for swarms of small fighters, but enough heavily-rusted Corrhulks were still shambling along in merchant fleets and pirate gangs to give the ship a reputation. “Tooley, what’s the Corrhulk’s ETA?”
“Couple drops if we’re lucky,” Tooley said. “I can get us out of here before then if you get back to the ship.”
“And provided it doesn’t try to chase us,” Kamak said.
“Undo my restraints and I will transmit your cooperation to the vessel,” Junior said. “There is benefit to mutual cooperation.”
“And if your friends on the ship don’t agree?”
“Then you will be killed.”
“Love the bluntness,” Kamak grunted. “I’ve got enough friends.”
“Kamak,” Doprel grunted.
“Oh, I’m sorry, are we making friends with your cousins who want to eat you now?”
“We have more enemies than allies,” Farsus said. “Questionable friends are still friends.”
“We’ve got like four drops on our escape window, guys,” Tooley said. “Whatever you’re going to do, do it now.”
“There are those among the Doccan who have spoken to our informant directly,” Junior said. “Further dialogue may yield further relevant information.”
“Oh fuck me,” Kamak said. “Whatever. Not like we’ve ever made a smart decision, might as well make a stupid one on purpose.”
With a reluctant nod from Kamak, Doprel reached down and untied the thick cables holding Junior in place. The titanic alien immediately drifted towards the console and started inputting a complex series of commands.
“Get back on the ship,” Kamak ordered. “Tooley, prep us to detach and start calculating a faster-than-light vector for us. We’re negotiating over comms, and if they say anything we don’t like, we’re out.”
“Oh, are we not going to invite the murderous sociopaths onto our ship for some drinks and snacks?”
“Just shut up and get us ready, Tooley!”
“Ready to die, maybe,” Tooley grumbled. She shut down her comm link in order to get the last word and started calculating their escape route while everyone else made a mad dash back to the Hard Luck Hermit. Before she rounded the corner and drifted out of sight, To Vo La Su took a look back at the cockpit, back at Junior.
He’d picked up the corpse of his dead copilot and was beginning to gnaw on it. No sense letting good nutrients go to waste. To Vo started to wonder what they were getting themselves into.

​
https://preview.redd.it/ahl29u0mu73b1.jpg?width=453&format=pjpg&auto=webp&v=enabled&s=cc1b571612182aff5e4cef882d9095a7be6f2375
Hello Bully it's me again, The Bully soundtrack composed by the genius Shawn Lee is pretty rad, so as a music enthusiastic, i want to share this post for people really obsessed with the Bully songs like me, tried to include every song in the game like as puzzle pieces getting together with the greatest amount, most accurate and similar as possible in one sitting, with some help around the internet, personal discoveries and songs already mentioned for yourselves so thank you nonetheless, and sorry for the repetition. Unfortunately some will still be missing so "a little help"/hits for these unreferenced sounds are very welcome.
Some songs are pretty obvious but others looks well hidden, but that's the fun of it, not every song is a sample, they just sound alike or has interpolations.
I know it would be boring to reading all of this so also dedicated this YouTube playlist in details for, so that you can check thoroughly for a more accurate comparison: 😎👍 - Have Fun! https://m.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLtZ1VivcLOsiTtYHUrK-xw8OHZZAeOzRf
★ Main Storyline
·Welcome to Bullworth (Menu theme): Suspiria Theme - Goblin
·This Is Your School: The Duck - Shawn Lee
·The Setup/Bait/The Gym is Burning: Organ Donor - DJ Shadow
·Slingshot/Revenge on Mr. Burton "Part 3" (Fun): My Sweet Lord - George Harrionson the ex-Beatles & Billy Preston
·Save Algie: Love My Way - Psychedelic Furs
·Defend Bucky/The Eggs/Weed KilleStronghold Assault (Action): Shake, Shake, Shake - KC & The Sunshine Band, A Little Less Conversation - Elvis Presley, Hocus Pocus - Focus
·That B****/The Diary/Jealous Johnny/Paparazzi: This Must Be The Place (Naive Melody) - Talking Heads
·The Candidate/Cook's Date: Oh Yeah - Yello
·Halloween/The Big Prank: The Chase - Shawn Lee, Burning Bridges - The Republic From The Getaway Game - Shawn Lee
·Help Gary: Cannonball - Breeders (it also reminds me the "X-Files Theme - Mark Snow" but this is overthinking)
·Character Sheets: Agent Woodrow - The Woodies
·Hattrick vs. Galloway: Cat Blues - Seatbelts (Drum Patterns)
·Movie Tickets (Sneaking On A Date): All Mine, Glory Box - both by Portished
·Carnival Date (Romance): Kiss The Sky - Shawn Lee's Ping Pong Orchestra (also features in "Tales from the Bordelands Episode 2")
·Prep Challenge/Boxing Challenge: Drums on Phasing - Joe Ufer (Sample)
·Race the Vale/Lola's Race: Casio VL-1 Tone (Sampler) *a lot of songs use this instrument for samples, for Bully this is predominant in bike races, it also reminds the iconic song "Funkytown - Lipps inc."
·Beach Rumble: Tenebre 12 mix - Claudio Simonetti
·Tad's House: Billie Jean (Bass Only) - Michael Jackson
·Tagging/Making a Mark (Wildstyle): Chic - Good Times
·Wrong Part of Town/Busting In, Part I: Prog Punk, Psyche Drums (*After The Release!) - Shawn Lee's Ping Pong Orchestra
·The Tenements/Norton Boss Fight: Human Fly - Cramps, I Wanna Be Your Dog - Iggy Pop & the Stooges
·The Rumble/Defender of the Castle (Epic Confrontation): Matador - X Mal Deutschland (as the "wildstyle" music many songs are similar to this, i listed the most accurate or the most fun imo, at least)
·Nerd Challenge/Consumo Arcade (Menu): Sakura, Sakura - Traditional Japanese Folk Song
·Nerd Challenge/Consumo (Main): Four Thousand Years of Chinese History - SNK Sound Team from Fatal Fury: King of Fighters Game
·Glass House/Smash It Up (Destruction/Vandalism): Rapture - Blondie, The Breaks - Kurtis Blow
·Nice Outfit: Odetta - Hit or Miss (Drum Patterns), Dig Your Own Hole - Chemical Brothers (Drum Patterns)
·The Big Game (Nerds "Agent")/Revenge on Mr. Burton "Part 2": Big Bad Wolf - Shawn Lee
·Rats in the Library: You Rock My World - Michael Jackson, Spies In The Wires - Cabaret Voltaire
·Preppies Vandalized (Punishment): D12 40 Oz. - Mr. Stan
·Busting In, Part II/Paper Route: Identity - X-Ray Spec, Mongoloid - Devo
·Showdown at the Plant (Overture): "Saracens Theme" - The Warriors Game
·Complete Mayhem (Street Fight): Criminal - Fiona Apple (also resembles "All Caps - Madvillain-Madvillainy or MF Doom" and "Intermezzo 2 - Mr. chop" but this was released in 2009)
·School's Out (End Credits): Walk On The Wild Side (Bass and Rhythm Pattern) - Lou Reed by Velvet Underground
\Christmas is Here, Small Offences, Discreet Deliveries, The Collector, Mailbox Armageddon and Go See The Principal doesn't feature a unique theme or has any song.*
★ Miscellaneous, Ambience & Shop themes
·Chase Prefect and Police: The Shaft intro and end themes - Isaac Hayes, Beat Dis (12 Version) - Bomb The Bass
·Chase Adults/A Little Help: Take California - Propellerheads, Secret Agent - Bjorn Lynne
·Detention/Mowing Laws - Unused track from The Warrior Game (it doesn't have an actual name, sorry)
·Bike Race 1: Casio VL-1 Tone (Sampler)
·Bike Race 2: Sonic CD Game - Wacky Workbench Zone - Bad Future
·Kart Race (Main) or "Lowrider": You Baby - The Turtles
·Kart Race (Beta): Baba Hya - Lafayette Afro Rock Band
·General Store "Yum Yum Market": Cover Girl - Gabriele Ducros
·Hair Saloon (Poor) "The Final Cut": Punky Dragster - Tele Music
·Hair Saloon (Rich) "Old Bullworth Vale": Dance Feeling - Tele Music
·Clothing Store (Poor) "Worn In Used Clothing": Disco Revisited - Tele Music
·Clothing Store (Rich) "Aquaberry Outlet" (*After The Release!): Now That Is Jazz - Charlie's Bistro Ensemble
·Janitor's Room: Lonesome Heart Swing - Dennis Caplinger
·Carnival Ambience "Billy Crane's Traveling Carnival": Golden Brown - Stranglers
·Box Club Ambience "Glass Jaw Boxing Club": Icy Nation - Tele Music
·Preppie's Hideout Beach "Lighthouse" (*After The Release!): With My Maker I Am One - Chill Coffehouse Drip
·Dragon's Wing Comic Store (*After The Release!): Daniel Loves Singing - C. Allocco
·Nerd's Hideout "Dragon's Wing Comic Store" (Under): Soaring Song - Tele Music
·Jock's Hideout "Jock's Clubhouse": Grand Theft Auto (Song) - Craig Conner
·Monkey Fling (Menu): it reresemble Super Mario World Overworld theme
·Future Street Racer (Main): The Doom - Shadow The Hedgehog 2005 Game
★ Xmas Themes
Holiday themes features various artists, this list is based on the ones made by Shawn lee itself for his album "A Very Ping Pong Christmas: Funky Treats form Santa's Bag", The original composers is on the song description.
·Balls of Snow: Carol of the Bells - Mykola Leontovych
·Miracle on Bullworth St.: Jingle Bells - James Lord Pierpont
·Rudy the Red Nosed Santa: O Come All Ye Faithful (Adeste Fideles) - John Francis Wade & Frederick Oakeley
·Nutcrackin': Deck The Halls - Thomas Oliphant, Little Dummer Boy - Katherine Kennicott Davis, Harry Simeone & Henry Onorati
·Bike Shop (Xmas) "Shiny Bikes": Let it Snow! - Gary Hoey (Dean Martin is the original composer) (Most famous by Frank Sinatra)
·Clothing Store (Poor) (Xmas) "Worn In"/Clothing Store (Rich) (Xmas) "Aquaberry": Jingle Bells (Dan The Automator) - Dean Martin, *the Aquaberry outlet uses a different tone in jazz
·Janitor's Room (Xmas)/Hair Saloon (Poor)(Xmas) "The Final Cut": Up On The House Top (Ho, Ho, Ho) - Gene Autry
·Dragon's Wing Comic Store (Xmas)/Hair Saloon (Rich)(Xmas)"Old Bullworth Vale": We Wish You a Merry Christmas - Traditional English (Britain) Folk Song
·Xmas Tree: Dance Of The Sugar-Plum Fairy - Piotr Ilitch Tchaikovski
\The General Store "Yum Yum Market" reuses a song collage of various themes as Deck the Halls, We Wish You a Merry Christmas and Jingle Bells in that order on looping.*
★ Classes
·Music classes features American Folk and American March Songs since the game takes place in USA
Class 1: Turkey In The Straw
Class 2: Masterpiece Fanfare
Class 3: She'll Be Coming 'Round the Mountain
Class 4: Liberty Bell March (also known as "Monty Python Theme")
Class 5: The Washington Post March (also sounds similar to "Willian Tell Act" by Charlie Chaplin)
·English Class: Piéces de Clavecin en concert; La Timide - Jean-Philippe Rameau
·Art Class: Come With the Night (Drum Patterns) - Sugar Stick (also resembles "Test Area - Broadcast" or "Serpent Magique - Tangerine Dream")
·Photography Class/BMX Park (*After The Release!): Automatic - Shawn Lee & AM (for observation, the Bike Park and Photography theme are slightly different, not the same)
·Biology: Dara Factor One - Weather Report Music, Heist in Helsinki (*After The Release!) - Shawn Lee's Ping Pong Orchestra
\Geography class uses a medley of characteristic instruments and sounds of world nations*
★ Cliques & Boss fights
·Vendetta Non-Clique: Ode To Billie Joe - Lou Donaldson
·Vendetta Bullies: Skin Therapy - Mr. Dibbs (also features in Tony Hawk's Underground 2003 Game), And on the Sixth Day - Pat Williams
·Vendetta Nerds/Stronghold Assault (Nerd Boss Fight): Casio VL-1 Tone (Sampler), Da Da Da - Trio (not only the song but the nerds cliques itself looks heavy inspired by the movie Revenge of the Nerds, some themes would also fit for Nerds in particular "Burning Down The House by Talking Heads")
·Vendetta Preppies: Billie Jean - Michael Jackson, Whip it - Devo
·Vendetta Greasers: Play For Today - The Cure, Private Idaho - B-52's, Disorder - Joy Division
·Vendetta Jocks: Amen, Brother - The Winstons, Drums Away - The Simon Song (Drums Intro), The Assembly Line - Commodores (this one use one of the most famous samples in music the "Amen Break" by Winstons as initially mentioned)
·Vendetta Dropouts/Townie Challenge: Tédio - Biquíni Cavadão, I Love Rock 'N Roll - The Arrows (Original Composers) *the guitar riff and bass pattern is extremely similar to "Pretty Fly by Offspring" but the song "Tédio" is alot older and still more accurate to the townies theme
·Russell in the Hole: Firestarter (Drum Patterns) - Prodigy, Devotion (Voice of Paradise) - Ten City
·Dishonorable Fight: Eye of the Tiger, Burning Heart - both by Survivor
·Fighting Johnny Vincent: Boogie Woodie - The Beach Boys, Caldonia Boogie - Louis Jordan (also covered by James Brown) *this song line is also referred as "The Walking Bass" featured in many Classic Rock songs
·The Big Game (Jock Boss Fight): Just Like Heaven, A Forest - The Cure, Harmonia - Dino
·Showdown at the Plant: Headhunter - Front 242, Are You Red..Y - The Clash
·Final Showdown: Underwater March - Klaus Badelt, 2001 NBA Ultimate Player (Film Score) *God of War (2018) Game also has a similar tone in "Spartan Rage" overture by Bear McCreary
★... Uncertain? ...Suggestions
·Bully Main Theme (Running Theme): Maniac - Michael Sembello, the synthesizer effect looks an interpolation of the xylophone effect used in the game.
·Overworld (Walking Theme) - The Phantom of the Opera Motion Picture Overture (this also resambles "echoes" by pink floyd but that peculiar melody is more predominant in this theme), Let's Ge Started (Bass Only) - Black Eyed Peas, it looks heavily inspired by Dario Argento movies (as the overall soundtrack).
·Here's to you Ms. Philips/Last Minute Shopping/Cook's Crush/Discretion Assured/Finding Johnny Vincent/Revenge on Mr. Burton "Part 1" (The Search): Sounds similar to "Tenant - Siouxsie And The Banshees", people often confuse this theme to "Cheating Time" but the track is named "Here's to you Ms. Philips" as does the mission, it also resembles a Giorgio Gaslini piece an italian jazz pianist or the american compositor Henry Mancini the creator of Pink Panther iconic theme.
·Panty Raid/Galloway Away/Cheating Time (Stealth): Love Theme From "The Godfather" or "Speak Softly, Love" or just The Godfather Theme from Nino Rota a renowned italian composer, written by Larry Kusik, also resembles the song "Hey by Pixies".
·Comic Klepto: Where’d You Go - Fort Minor e Jonah Matranga (interpolation), also resembles Gramatik, Transplants, Flobots or X-Ecutiornes style of song.
·Funhouse Fun/ Funhouse (Ambience): Carnival of the Animals; Introduction and Royal March of the Lion ("Marche Royale du Lions") - Camille Saint-Saëns (interpolation)
·Funhouse Graveyard "Carnival Funhouse Graveyard" (Unused/Beta): Lux Aeterna - Clint Mansell & Kronos Quartet; Requiem For A Killer Movie Score
·Shop Class "Auto Repair Shop": Sounds similar to Star Guitar - Chemical Brothers, Cities in the Dust - Siouxie And The Banshees
·Math Class (Beta): Sounds similar to Nightmare on Elm Street Theme
·Gym Class/Lockpicking/Jocks Challenge: Sounds similar to "Resucitó" an old catholic song
·Bike Shop "Shiny Bikes": Sounds similar to Billy Club - Junkie XL, Horndog - Overseer
·Greaser's Hideout/Greaser's Challenge "Blue Balls Pool House" "Tattoo Parlor" & "The Happy Mullet": Sounds similar to In-Cut Overdrive - Tomonori Sawada; Sega Rally 2006 Game
·Townies/Dropouts Hideout "Dropout Hangout": Sounds similar to Babel - Covenant
★ Still Missing... Unknown?
·Chemistry Class: although i can't find a matching song it doesn't sound like music per se
·Math Class (Main): definitely a funky/soul tune, unfortunately i couldn't find a corresponding song for it
·Nut Shots: resembles Gradius songs a game by Konami or AiAce Combat a Namco Game
I REALLY LOVE BUNNIES, THEY'RE SO NICE!
I Hope you like it 😎👍

Hey Sportsfans — it's time for Week 9 of baseball Power Rankings: It may be Tuesday, but still thought about how much we dislike your favorite team 8 Days a Week. Also pool side blackjack is now my favorite part of Las Vegas. John Fisher, please ignore.
Every voter has their own style / system and the only voting instructions are these:

"To an extent determined individually, you must take into account how strong a team is right now and likely to be going forward. You must, to some degree, give weight to the events and games of the previous week."

TRANSPARENCY: This link will show you who voted each team where and has added neat statistics!
New Voter Chance: Are you a fan of the Dodgers? Why? We have a new voter oppening. Please check this comment for details.
If something is a little messed up, feel free to pester me let me know.
Total Votes: 28 of 29. So close.

#		Team	Δ	Comment	Record
1		Rays	0	Everyone's favorite myliobatiformes played another good week of baseball with the return of Tyler Glasnow. The Rays took an exciting series against the Dodgers after recharging during a weird mid-series rest day against the Blue Jays. Wander Franco is making his case to be starting SS in the All-Star Game, just make sure you don't accidentally vote for one of his brothers. It's still super weird to watch the offense carry while the bullpen struggles, but with guys coming back it should be f--, wait, Fairbanks is hurt again.	39-17
2		Rangers	+1	Series wins against both the Pirates and Orioles the last week has the club holding the 3rd best overall record in the majors. Go Stars. We're still having fun.	34-19
3		Braves	-1	3-4 last week and we started this week off with a loss against the Oakland "Triple A's" which is not good Bob. On the VERY brightside, we saw Soroka pitch from an MLB mound for the first time in almost 3 years. He pitched well and we need him to perform as we are absolutely depleted by injuries. Riley is starting to come to life. We hold a 4 game lead on the scond place MARLINS. Our division doesn't want to take advantage of our recent struggles, that's fine by me.	32-22
4		Dodgers	+1		33-22
5		Orioles	-1	A few weeks ago, I said if the Orioles can go at least .500 in May then they are for real. They wrapped up a winning month yesterday and have three games to go. They continue to play well, even though they lost the series against the Rangers, and seem to play better away from Camden Yards. They did, however, send Grayson Rodriguez down this week to AAA. He just has some stuff to figure out. He was getting crushed in his past few starts, and it was the right move to make. This solidifies the fact they need a frontline starter if they are going to make a serious push to get to and make noise in the post-season.	34-20
6		Astros	0	Jose Abreu finally hit a home run. All is right with the world. Unless the world's name is Lance McCullers Jr., who had another discomforting setback and we have no idea when we will see him this year. I still blame his hair. Anyway, our other Jose hit a grand slam at MMP this weekend. Where have we heard that before?	31-22
7		Yankees	0	It certainly would’ve been nice to take 2/3 from Baltimore, but it’s very hard to be mad at the Yankees’ month of May. Since May 1, the Yankees are 18-9, a huge turnaround from a .500 April. As we enter the dog days of summer, the top of the AL East is tightening up, but the Yankees don’t face either of the teams ahead of them again until July. The Yankees have to keep playing at this pace, and a Stanton (and maybe Rodon??) return could seriously help that.	33-23
8		D-Backs	+1	The Diamondbacks had a decent week, barely missing out on a sweep of the Phillies before dropping a series to the Red Sox. The offense gets on base but has been allergic to driving in RISP, and the starting rotation continues to be a merry-go-round, as none of the rookie pitchers on the team seem to be able to string together several good starts in a row without getting blown up once or twice.	31-23
9		Blue Jays	+1	The Jays' first series win since May 14th pulled us out of a bad-vibes tailspin the likes of which this fanbase hasn't seen since, well, the last time everybody freaked out over a losing streak. The usual suspects' continued confounding slow starts (Manoah, Kirk, Varsho, etc) have dropped us 10 games back from TB, last place in the best division in baseball. And YET, hope springs. Berrios (3 or fewer ER in 8 of his last 9 starts) finally appears to be pitching to the level expected of him when he was signed, and is pumping out quality starts along with Gausman and Bassitt. Kikuchi has slipped as Kikuchi does but has been very solid for a #5. We don't have the depth to send Manoah down for some needed alone time, but he's pushing it. Vladdy has been scuffling, Springer is heating up, and Bichette is an MVP candidate. With a little bit of lucky regression to the mean with abysmal RISP numbers, this team is just a few turns away from being very good. As long as we don't have to play too many games vs AL East teams. That should be fine.	28-26
10		Twins	-2		28-26
11		Mariners	+4	Just what the doctor ordered - 6-1 in the homestand so far. Some momentum is just what this team needs before two big series with teams they're chasing for playoff spots. If the M's can handle business over the next week, they'll be right back in the thick of it. Bryce Miller, do your thing. Up next: 3 vs. Damn Yankees, 3 @ Globe Life ParkFieldStadiumGardensArenaDomewhatever they're calling it these days	28-26
12		Red Sox	-1	Scoring four runs total while getting swept by the Angels isn't a great look. This team is in many ways aggresively mediocre, always making sure that every win streak is followed up by an equally painful gut-punch. This is mainly due to the reliance on the offense to carry us to victory (2-17 when scoring <=3 runs), when the bats get cold, you're safe to turn off the game. Whitlock returning from injury and Bello/Sale both stepping up their game in May (2.74/2.42 ERA respectively) are good steps towards this team becoming Actually Good™ though. We'll see what June brings us...	28-25
13		Brewers	-1	Taking two of three from the Astros was nice. Barely avoiding a sweep from the Giants was not so sweet. Milwaukee has some issues with hitting in "close" situations. The Brewers either lose after having multiple opportunities to tie it up, or get absolutely blown out.	28-25
14		Angels	0	Did I travel out of state and all the way to Anaheim just to watch the team get swept by the Marlins? Perhaps. Was that objectively worse than what the Reds voter is going through? It's impossible to say.	29-26
15		Mets	-2	The Mets, who I proclaimed to be "good at baseball" last week, ended up dropping 2 of 3 against the Cubs and doing the same against the Rockies. I just don't know what to believe anymore. The only thing I know for sure is that Francisco Alvarez has got that fucking dawg in him, he's GOATed, he's him, he's on fleek, he's poggers, he's a proper legend, he's got an .885 OPS, he's a top bloke, he's got swag, he's fresh, he's Gen Z Mike Piazza, he's lit, he's making me feel old because he was born after 9/11, he's Francisco Alvarez.	27-27
16		Gigantes	+4	The Giants won yesterday, but strictly talking about last week, they went 5- 2 on an extremely acceptable road trip without any off days. Defeating two competent teams like the Twins and Brewers should feel good. On both losses, they gave up 7 runs, on every win they gave up 3, 1, or 0 runs. So, they threw two games out of 7 – that’s allowed. In the bad news department, Joc, Joey, and Thairo all not expected back until June 6th. I think we’re okay with more Bailey Patrick and this also means another look at unpredictable slugger David Villar. Slater continues covering for Joc. Let’s look a the numbers: 13th in MLB in Run Diff (+6 spots), 12th in RS / G (+6), 15th in RA / G (+2), 23rd in Bullpen ERA (+5). All of that is good and especially the bullpen is promising recently. The Giants continue at home vs the Pirates and wrap the homestand with 3 against our orange and black brothers in Baltimore.	28-26
17		Pirates	-1	Would I have been happy to learn on Opening Day that the Pirates would be around .500 at the end of May? Yes. But if you told me they got there after starting 20-8 I would be pretty disappointed. Here's hoping the pendulum swings the other way in June.	26-27
18		Marlins	+3	Yet another appearance of sweepy, the meme that was promised. After a rough series against the rox, we sweep the angels to settle into the third NL wild card spot. Our starting pitching is coming along after a bumpy start to several of our starters. Eury perez is gonna be a stud, just wanna remind yall. Also, shout out to Jorge Soler, who has been crushing baseballs the last week and change. In other miami sports related news, boston is the first city ever to lose two game 7s at home in both the NHL and NBA playoffs in the same year. Go Heat and go Panthers!	28-26
19		Phillies	-2	After losing 2 to the Diamondbacks and going down 5-0 in the 3rd game, the Phillies season looked as bleak as it could in late May while only being 4 games under .500. However, the team rallied and Trea Turner tied it in the 9th before going onto win it in 10. Then, they went down to Atlanta and split a 4 game series. It could've gone far worse. The Phillies most pressing need is now seemingly a 5th starter who isn't a guaranteed loss, as this week they trotted out Dylan Covey, who hadn't started a game since 2019. He got 2 outs and gave up 7 runs. He took the spot of Bailey Falter who, after a surprisingly productive 2022, started the season 0-7. Falter is the far better option, but Dave Dombrowski will likely be looking to upgrade until Andrew Painter can finally return. This week, the NL East road trip continues with their first 3 games against the Mets and 3 in Washington. Here's hoping June Schwarber shows up again this year.	25-28
20		Padres	-1	My Dad tells me it’s ok that the Dad’s lost 2 / 3 to NY; the Dodgers lost 2 / 3 to the Rays! The Pads aren’t in the same stratosphere as the Dodgers right now, though. 5 games under .500, 10th in the NL standings, 3 games out of the last wildcard slot. Of course there’s quite a bit of time to change it, there’s plenty of time to go on a run, or a slow and steady good month to gain ground. With every day that passes however, that goal becomes a bit harder to reach; I don’t think Pads fans were hoping for a wildcard spot by the end of this season, but that’s the position the team has to get to before even thinking of catching LA. The Padres are 4th in the NL West, and only a half game out of last.	24-29
21		Cardinals	-3	2-2 @ CIN; 1-2 @ CLE; 0-1 v KCR; another struggle week for the Cards. The fandom's been a bit kneejerk because of two good weeks before this. Their mistake. I'll say it a third time, the Cards playing at or beyond their expected level doesn't change the rotten FO. Yeah Marmol's pretty close to being fired, that's not a fix when the problem is John Mozeliak.	24-32
22		Tigers	+2	The most fun part of this past week has been watching the resurgence of Akil Baddoo. His energy is infectious and adds an exciting dimension to the lineup. As we head into the last few days of May, Baddoo has sported a .302/.405/.508 slash and a 155 wRC+ this month. Although he's still been hitting mostly in the 6 hole, if this keeps up he might find himself much higher in the order real soon. This week: 2 more vs. TEX and 3 at CWS.	25-27
23		Guardians	0	The Guardians won a series this week. I would like to see them win some games by more than one run, but it's clear this season, we have to take what we get.	24-29
24		Cubs	-2	Another terrible week for the Cubs, as a promising series win against the Mets was followed up by an embarrassing sweep against the Reds. The starting rotation was terrible, and the bullpen was somehow worse. Fans have had enough of David Ross, and Jed Hoyer is starting to come under pressure. Barring a dramatic turnaround, the Cubs will be sellers for the 3rd trade deadline in a row	23-30
25		Reds	+1	Okay guys, I’m here to be calm this week. I have been told by my wife’s attorney, Tom, that they are “aware” of my online activity regarding our impending divorce, so today let’s have a nice, calm, relaxing, perfectly fine, good old fashioned talk about Reds baseball. The Reds are just sorta middling. They’re not great but they’re not horrible. Unlike my marriage. Our starting pitching has resgressed, just like my marriage, and it’s very unfortunate to see, because our bullpen has been quite reliable unlike my wife. We still can’t hit home runs for some reason, but overall unlike my marriage the Reds on the upturn. There, are you happy Tom? I didn’t mention all the crap that’s been going on lately. I didn’t mention how I had to leave the Motel 6 I was at because I found a used needle in the bathroom, and by the way Tom, I know that you’re trying to use that as evidence that I can’t take care of my kids. I don’t even know who’s needle it was, it was like wedged behind the toilet. Believe me, I only found it because I dropped my phone while using the toilet. It wasn’t even visible, I had to like get on my hands and knees and crawl behind the toilet to grab my phone. So it puts the image in my head of some heroin addict or whatever sitting behind a toilet at a Motel 6 trying to get high, which honestly that just seems like an even worse situation than the one i’m in. Do I think it’s a coincidence that the day after I left the Motel 6 because of this, you’re requesting a drug test from me before I can see my kids? Huh Tom? How did you know about this incident Tom? The only people that know are the Motel 6 staff I notified, I don’t think any police showed up, so either you questioned them like i’m some criminal, or you’re following me. I know you’re reading this Tom, you’ve made several references to my posts on the baseball power rankings insinuating it’s me writing them, and yeah Tom you’re right it is me, can everybody in the comments give praise to Tom for being a regular Sherlock Holmes? Yeah everybody come on, Congratulations Tom! You’re the man! I’m gonna let you go home and fuck my sister, oh wait Tom I forgot, YOU ALREADY ARE. When you get home tonight tell Caitlin her brother says hi. Alright, I think I got that out of my system. Anyway, I think once more of our prospects are called up, probably around June or July, we may get hot and finish more closely to .500 than initially thought, and if this division stays like it is, and those prospects can deliver on their promise, it's entirely possible we could be in contention for the division. But a lot of this is gonna depend on if our Starting Rotation can get things back under control. Also we swept the Cubs so lol.	24-29
26		Nationals	-1	Week after week, I expect this Nats team to take a nose dive. I expect them to crumble and slip into a double-digit losing streak but it just isn't happening. They lead the NL in batting average (.267), are third in OBP (.330) and have the lowest strikeout rate in MLB. They still have their own troubles, but this team is alive (4 games out of a WC spot)	23-31
27		Rockies	+1	I don't have time to write a real blurb this week so you don't have to print this. Actually, you probably don't read these, I'm not sure anyone really reads them anyways besides the Reds guy's life breaking down, and this will probably get printed regardless.	24-31
28		White Sox	-1	Liam is back. I can't overstate how great that is to hear. He is one of the best people in the game and it's nothing short of amazing for him to be pitching in May. If you missed it, it was recently revealed that he had stage 4 lymphoma, not an early stage. He started treatment just over 3 months ago! Nothing on the field matters for this team, but at least there's that silver lining.	22-34
29		Royals	0	As of the time that this blurb is being written (Monday at 11:39 AM), only two teams in the majors have a record below .400. Yup, the Royals are there with the A's. I suppose the positive is that the team figured out that they can get rid of useless players in Hunter Dozier, but they still have a lot more work to do.	17-38
30		Atléticos	0	The A's have given up 10+ runs in a game 7 more times than they've won. It's a mix of bad roster building (the bullpen), under-preforming vets (Ramon Laureano 74 wRC+, Tony Kemp 38 wRC+), injuries (Seth Brown and Paul Blackburn are just now returning), and no fans in the stands since 2019. It's soul crushing to watch and the national media's constant condecention toward this particular poor team and it is even more annoying this year.	11-45

Before I begin my story I must maintain that my sentence to death was a wrong and vile thing to do. I maintain that I am not a killer. I did not kill the schoolchildren the authorities decided to hang me for.
My sentence to death, I must maintain, is a huge misunderstanding. There must be forces out there against me, who conspired to put me in prison for this very experiment, this accursed expedition.
I am not deranged. I am not insane.
The man in the odd multicolored sweater paid me a visit a week before my scheduled execution date. “You are the former schoolteacher Chet Adami?” he asked, polite, offering me a plastic cup of coffee.
I nodded, taking a sip. “I didn’t kill those kids,” I reiterated, for about the thousandth time. “Are you the uh, priest guy? That comes before-”
He shook his head and waved away the guards. “My name is Canopy Hydrangea,” he introduced, extending a hand. I shook it. “I understand you may not be guilty, despite what the state believes.”
I nodded. “Finally, someone who-”
He cut me off. “I’m not interested in your story. Whether you die or not is of no consequence to the people I represent,” he continued. “But I am here to offer you a deal. There’s a place the people I represent need exploring, and I need volunteers.”
He produced a sheet of paper and a pen. “This agreement,” he clasped it into my hands, “has you join a team of expendable, uh, volunteers such as yourself on this expedition. You get in, get the things we need, and get out- and you’re free for life.”
This was better than dying in prison.
I asked him what place this was that I’d be sent to. He told me I had to sign the form first. “I’ll do it, then,” I cheered, signing the document.
He smiled and patted me on the shoulder. “We’ll even give you a whole new identity,” he offered. And with that, he seized the document away from me and left the building.
Within hours I was blindfolded, sedated, and transported. When I awoke I was strapped to a bed in a helicopter, with four others beside me, all beginning to wake up.
The man who’d offered me the deal was there too, sucking on a lollipop while rearranging documents and photographs.
These images, I assumed, was the place they wanted us to explore. They were mostly all aerial photos, a sea of endless green and the occasional bird. And yet, there was more- images of impossible landscapes, dreamlike beings.
“Ah, you guys are awake!” he clapped once, and walked over.
The next few moments were a flash as he re-injected us with some sort of blue, wriggling substance. It was cold, and I swear it pulsed inside my arm.
Then we had landed, and the group was quickly taken inside a compound. We were freed and sat down in some sort of meeting room. More people were inside.
A blue haired lady joined the man.
“Welcome, volunteers,” he announced, pointing to a projector. “You are all, save for one, prisoners on death row,” he reminded. “This offer today is simple- you enter the forest, travel to an outpost we have recently lost contact with,” he turned on the projector, displayed a bright red cylinder labeled ‘SYSTEM RECORDER-A32’, “and recover this data module.”
The woman spoke next. “Easy, right?” she counted us. “We’ll provide maps,” she gestured to tablets. “But this forest is different.”
They proceeded to explain the reason they need ‘volunteers’ for the assignment then.
We were on an island somewhere in the Java Sea. The island had a massive forest in the center, one that at first glance seemed as normal as ever. This changed when an international mining company sent in a team of geologists to determine if there was anything of note beyond the forest.
This team never returned.
Nor did a second team, armed with weapons. Or an environmentalist group that ventured in to document new species. So then the organization our recruiters had come from entered the forest.
We were on the outskirts of the forest, at a place they were calling Ake Base.
Over the past month, they had begun to map the forest and determine why so many hadn’t returned. The reason was illogical- the forest was bigger than the island itself.
Drones that ventured in should have come out the other side- yet remained inside the forest, encountering bizarre phenomena and creatures undocumented.
Every so often, the forest would slope downwards, revealing a new layer with new and distinct ecosystems.
“Recently though,” Canopy concluded, “we’ve lost contact with several outposts in the third layer to eighth layers.” He changed the slide to one of the lost outposts, standing alone amidst a vibrant, alien forest. “You enter the forest, get to your team’s assigned outpost, get back out with the data and you’ll be set for life.”
“Does anyone choose to rescind their agreement?” the woman asked. “It’s either death, or this, and frankly, your chances here aren’t that better.”
There were some who raised their hands. “Hell no!” a man shouted. “I’m goin’ back to life!” The woman had them taken away. We heard gunfire outdoors. No life row for him.
Whoever they were- they were serious about this.
They started to call out names and assign teams.
My team, was small, four of us. There was a mercenary named Leo who kept talking about the food the organization had brought us. He seemed pleasant, charismatic, and I almost forgot he was a criminal.
There was a scientist called Anya who, as she joked, was ‘serving infinite life sentences’ for crimes against humanity. She was given the codes and a booklet of things to watch out for in what they called the ‘Sea of Green’.
Then there was Gail. She was quieter than the three of us, and had an almost eerie vibe to her. She didn’t tell us what she’d done to get here, but she was there nonetheless.
Thankfully, we were given the closest- and safest outpost. A little place in Layer Three, marked by the map as only a few hours walk away.
We set off the next day.
The forest, in the beginning, seemed to almost invite us in. The birds chirped and danced, unafraid of mankind. We even fed them the nuts we’d been given as breakfast rations, which they seemed to enjoy.
About an hour in, things changed. The light from the sun barely pierced the canopy, and at times, we had to utilize our flashlights to see what was in front of us. Leo took the lead, hacking away at the branch and vine in front of us.
The forest was starting to look like a jungle- and yet, as we traversed it never seemed to choose which one it wanted to be.
“Wait!” Anya hissed, as we crossed a stream that seemed oddly familiar. She read from the booklet, then to the map on tablets we’d been given. “We’ve made a circle.”
Leo shook his head. “That’s impossible,” he insisted. “I don’t remember turning.”
“Yeah,” I agreed, catching up from behind.
Anya shared the booklet. “It’s one first phenomena researchers encounter,” she explained. “This place plays tricks on us- we need to follow the stream.”
“But then,” Gail pointed out, “we’d be going in the wrong direction.”
“Trust the book,” Anya concluded. We followed the stream then, and the path started to grow denser, as if the forest hated us for traveling further. But the path was right, and the forest changed as we journeyed.
An hour later the forest had changed. It had sloped downwards a bit, inviting us to the second layer of the maze. The trees seemed higher, and the light was now gone completely.
This was when we started to hear it. Click-click.
“What was that?” I asked, turning. Click-click.
Anya rushed through the book. “It’s not documented.”
Click-click. And then we saw lights in the distance, lights that as we continued walking, were revealed to us as bulbous fruit on the trees that glowed an eerie electric blue.
Click-click. “You sure it’s not in that book?” Leo questioned, switching his machete out for a gun. Click-click.
The clicks were getting louder, each one sending a jolt of uneasy fear down my spine. We moved closer together now, fearing the unknown that were in these- A bush in front of us rustled. Leo aimed his weapon.
A deer- no, something like a deer popped out, gently squawking. It was… wrong in every sense, but it seemed more occupied in chewing a flower than us.
The small creature had the antlers of a deer, yes, but it also had the face of an old man. Not to mention six fists full of thumbs at the end of its legs. It inspected a glowing fruit with it’s odd thumbs.
“Ew,” Gail commented, disgusted. “What the hell is that?”
Anya didn’t have time to look for answers before a black, insectine limp shot out of one of the bulbous fruits and impaled the deer-thing. It screamed an all too human scream and struggled.
We backed away- and by then, the noise was overwhelming. Click-clickClick-clickClick-clickClickclickClickclickClick-clickClick-click. They erupted from every single one of the bulbous fruits, and things began to pour out of them.
The limbs, see, were attached to a head. The a simple sphere that opened into buzzsaws of teeth that grotesquely clicked as they opened. The face-deer only screamed as the clicking creatures devoured it.
“Run!” Leo reminded, shooting as some started to near us. “Run!”
That shook us out, and we ran, terror in our very veins. They seemed more interested in the fallen deer than us- but we still ran until we could no longer.
Actually, it was until I fell off and entered the third layer.
A weight appeared on my chest and I fought it off, thinking I was about to die- but the soft, furry creature atop me jumped off. It wasn’t one of the clicking monsters.
And then I realized the third layer was bright. The trees themselves were glowing now, not the insect fruits of before. And there were a whole host of new, bizarre creatures.
The thing I’d pushed off was some sort of rabbit, covered in glowing blue stripes. If layer two had been a forest of darkness this was it’s very opposite.
In the skies there were ribbons of glowing creatures- thin kites on an unseen wind. The trees were alive with all sorts of furried friends, darting here and there and eating odd colored berries that didn’t seem real.
Anya pointed and spoke, “Look!” It was the outpost, in ruins.
“But what attacked it?” Gail murmured, as we walked over.
We entered through a hole in the wall. The place was oddly peaceful, calming, now home to bioluminescent little ants that dotted the place. Occasionally, one or two of the face-deer would appear, licking the dots up with twin tongues that emerged from it’s too-human face.
“Cute,” Leo joked, picking one up and stroking it. It screamed back at him, chilling and he dropped it. “Never doing that again.”
The place was… too peaceful. And- “what happened to their bodies?” I posited. “If they were attacked- where’s their blood? Their corpses?”
Anya shrugged. “It is odd- perhaps they got devoured.” She gestured to the many oddities around us. “But you’re right, there should be bones, at least.”
This was when we heard the screaming. And all of a sudden every single creature retreated away, disappearing from view, save for the tiny ants inside with us. The screaming was a cacophony of voices, realer than the ones we’d heard from the face-deer.
“I think we need to go,” Leo whispered, holding out the red ‘data module’ in his hands. “Now.”
The screaming got ever closer, and the trees in front of the outpost, beyond a window, started to shake. “I concur.”
We were backing away when we heard the squelching of something loud and heavy. Turning around, we saw the screaming creature we’d heard. It was massive, fleshy, and filled with tiny gaping holes, some filled with eyes, all rising, breathing as one.
I nearly threw up. But that was for a different reason.
The holes were one thing. But the screaming, severed bodies of dozens of people attached the the eye-full monster was another. They screamed and screamed, their bodies unneatly joined and sown into the creature.
It sniffed the air and walked over to the glass, looking in as we hid. “What is it?” I squealed. “What the hell is that?”
The face of a victim in military clothes appeared at the window, screaming, face slowly popping, skin repairing and being digested all at once. Anya flipped through the pages. “They called it a Fleshweave. It absorbs bodies and eats them that way.”
That would explain the lack of bodies we’d seen.
The window shattered- and the thing began to force itself on it, flesh turning to churned cylinders through the window. The bodies, crushed further, screamed some more.
So we ran as the beasts fell into the room with a plop. And despite it’s heavy, gluttonous form it charged forwards, faster than it looked.
Out the outpost we went. I felt a meaty hand hit me and then I fell. It stalked towards me, but a gunshot from Leo burst it’s pus-ridden hand, covered my in grotesque, viscous liquid.
I picked myself up and ran from the screaming thing, up the steep slope and climbing onto the second layer.
I fell again, but Anya caught me, helping me up.
Leo did the same for Gail- but she slipped and fell back into the third layer. The thing approached her, all of it’s pulsing eyes upon her. “Help me!” she bellowed. “Don’t leave me-”
Leo prepared to jump down- but it was too late. The Fleshweave simply picked her up and it opened it’s skin, forging her into her body- er, her top half,- it severed the rest.
“Go!” I snapped, dragging the mercenary to action. The creature behind us lifted itself onto the dark forest and continued to follow.
Gail, merged with the other unfortunate bodies, screamed. I almost stopped in terror from the sound, but flight-or-fight forced me to continue.
Click-click. We found ourselves back in the center of the abode with the insect fruit. And the insects were clearly attracted to the stench of decay the monster emanated. Limbs emerged, and the face-beetles jumped up and swarmed the creatures.
I don't know if the creature was killed by it. I only remember Gail’s face as the insects started to pick her body- and so many others like her- apart.
The way out seemed harder than going in, but we made it. We survived. We reached the outpost and handed our data module to the man who’d offered us the deal. “Impressive,” he congratulated. “You’re the first team back.”
“I want out now,” I panted. “Back to real life.”
He patted me on the shoulder and gave me a sad smile. “According to the world you’ve already died by suicide in your cell,” he informed. “See, there’s a way the people I work for have operated so cleanly for the past few centuries.” He paused and took a step back. “We can’t afford loose ends, see, and you’ve shown us you have the guts to survive Bandai La- er, the Sea of Green.”
I took a step back, panicking. “What do you mean?”
He sighed. “We can’t give you a new life and risk exposing our operation here,” he explained. “And we still need ah, expendable people to lead us to whatever’s in the center of the island.” He handed me a can of soda. “Welcome to your new life. The Company really values your dedication as a treasured employee.”
​
​
But I don’t want this. I was promised freedom. And they can’t keep me from exposing them- I’ve typed this up and Anya did something to the tablet so I can receive and post things online.
I’m not sure if this’ll work. But if it is: I’m on an island somewhere in the Java Sea. There’s a forest that goes on forever and I’m being held as some sort of explorer by some Company.
Find me. Before I die.

A new Camp and Chill Event starts today!
This 2 day event will run from Tuesday, May 30 until 19:00 GMT Thursday, June 1, and is open to all players with version 10.2.1 or above, a minimum of 250 dragon power, and a stable and reliable internet connection.
Points are earned by tapping items, opening chests, and other simple tasks completed in Camp. The Event Capsule Store appears after earning 500 points; free Bronze Capsules containing Event Points can be collected every 3 hours after that.
 

NOTES:

• A small number of players are testing a new Egg Storage feature; for more info, here is the initial post from last Wednesday, the most active thread during Friday’s initial beta tester rollout, and the official website’s new Egg Storage info section.
• A calendar of 2023’s past and projected events has been posted.

Good luck and happy merging!
 

EVENT PRIZES

1. Sprouting Dragon Tree, lvl 2 - requires earning 70 points
2. Prism Flower Buds, lvl 2 - 1,290p
3. Blue Belly Shrooms, lvl 5 - 1,840p
4. Daily Chest (Super Egg Fragment) - 3,190p
5. Watering Hole, lvl 5 - 4,790p
6. Aged Glowing Dragon Tree, lvl 4 - 6,420p
7. Nice Zen Temple, lvl 3 - 7,990p
8. Golden Sapling, lvl 2 - 9,610p
9. Seth Dragon Kid, lvl 2 - 11,210p
10. Deer Dragon Kid, lvl 2 - 13,590p

Total to collect all prizes: 60,000 points
 

STRATEGY TIPS

This is the only type of event where point producing items can be stockpiled ahead of time; for info and links to guides on bubbling as a storage option, please visit the Community FAQ.
The following are the most efficient or popular ways to earn points:

• Tier 2 nests of most breeds yield 900 points per tap, for a total of 3,600 to 6,300 points per nest.
• High level Goal Stars are an excellent source of points; the exact number of taps available varies by level and random chance.
  • L6 Star- 1056, L5 Star- 330, L4 Star- 99
• Level 2 Materials Chests offer unlimited quick and easy points; stockpiling stone bricks gives more flexibility than buying specific chests ahead of time:
  • Spectral Chest- 1305, Summoned Chest- 820, Chest of Beasts- 300, Solid Gold Chest- 80, Phobos Chest- 40
• Higher level free chests all yield well:
  • Treasure: L7- 1690, L6- 530, L5- 165, L4- 50
  • Grimm: L4- 792, L3- 240, L2- 72
  • Season: L4- 330, L3- 100, L2- 30
  • Bountiful (Level) Chests- 150
  • Kala’s Rucksacks- 250
• High level Life Trees can be harvested for quick points:
  • Life Orbs: L9- 1560, L8- 500, L7- 160, L6- 50
• These chains recharge fast and give unlimited taps; note that multiple mid-level items may earn more than one or two higher-level items.
  • Fruit Trees: L10 Watermelon- 34, L9 Pineapple- 30, L8 Dragon Fruit- 26, L7 Pear- 23,
  • Prism Flowers: L7- 42, L6- 36, L5- 29, L4- 23
  • Midas Trees: L11- 145, L10- 135, L9- 125, L8- 115, L7- 105, L6- 95, L5- 85, L4- 75, L3- 65, L2- 55
  • Bushes: L5- 35, L4- 25, L3- 15
  • Graves: L8- 75, L7- 65, L6- 55, L5- 45, L4- 35
  • Fountains: L6- 136, L5- 105, L4- 75, L3- 45

 

ITEM POINTS

Alien Obelisks (Requires cash purchase)

• Alien Obelisk - 45
• Radioactive Alien Obelisk - 135
• Pulsing Alien Obelisk - 450
• Galactic Alien Megalith - 1485

Bushes

• Tiny Cabin - 10
• L1 Shrub Sprout - 1
• L2 Budding Shrub - 5
• L3 Nice Shrub - 15
• L4 Flowering Shrub - 25
• L5 Gorgeous Shrub - 35

Fruit Trees

• L4 Grape Tree - 10
• L5 Raspberry Tree - 14
• L6 Banana Tree - 18
• L7 Pear Tree - 23
• L8 Dragon Fruit Tree - 26
• L9 Pineapple Tree - 30
• L10 Watermelon Tree - 34

Goal Stars and Dragon Stars (points per tap)

• L1 Star - 3 (2-3 taps)
• L2 Star - 9 (2-3 taps)
• L3 Star - 30 (3-4 taps)
• L4 Star - 99 (3-4 taps)
• L5 Star - 330 (3-4 taps)
• L6 Star - 1056 (6-7 taps)
• L1 Dragon Star - 30 (2-4 taps)
• L2 Magnificent Dragon Star - 90 (7-11 taps)

Graves

• L4 Doom Cross - 35
• L5 Fiend’s Resting Place - 45
• L6 Tomb of the Innocent - 55
• L7 Tomb of the Forgiven - 65
• L8 Tomb of the Righteous - 75

Life Orbs (single tap)

• L0 Life Essence - 1
• L1 Tiny Life Orb - 1
• L2 Small Life Orb - 2
• L3 Life Orb - 3
• L4 Furious Life Orb - 5
• L5 Wondrous Life Orb - 15
• L6 Great Life Orb - 50
• L7 Giant Life Orb - 160
• L8 Life Orb of Souls - 500
• L9 The Life Orb of Heavens - 1560

Midas Trees

• L2 Golden Sapling - 55
• L3 Golden Tree - 65
• L4 Midas Tree - 75
• L5 Glowing Midas Tree - 85
• L6 The Orb Holder - 95
• L7 The Crystal Catcher - 105
• L8 The Moon Bearer - 115
• L9 The Star Mother - 125
• L10 Greater Midas Tree - 135
• L11 Divine Midas Tree - 145

MonsteMythical Idols (single tap)

• L1 Kattryx - 3
• L2 Guardian Sphinx - 9
• L3 Young Cerberus - 30
• L4 Noble Gryphon - 99
• L5 Mythical Ogopogo - 330
• L1 Gromblin - 5
• L2 Capricorn - 15
• L3 Dragon Idol - 50
• L4 Rising Phoenix - 165
• L5 Mythical Pegasus - 550

Mystic Topiaries (single use only, number of taps depends on level)

• L1 Bunny - 10 (1x tap)
• L2 Bear - 90 (1x tap)
• L3 Rex - 150 (2x taps)
• L4 Swan - 250 (3x taps)
• L5 Seahorse - 550 (5x taps)
• L6 Dolphin - 880 (10x taps)

Nests/Eggs

• Tier 1 nest - 20 per tap, 60 to 140 total
• Tier 2 nest - 900 per tap, 3,600 to 6,300 total (Except for T2 Star Dragons)
• Mystery Egg Nests - 10 per tap, 40 to 70 total
• Supernest - 20 per tap
• Meganest - 10 per tap (needs rechecking)
• Ultranests - 10 per tap (needs rechecking)
• Activated Super Eggs - 600 (30 per dragon)

Prism Flowers

• L1 Sprouting Prism Flower - 3
• L2 Prism Flower Buds - 10
• L3 Opening Prism Flowers - 16
• L4 Prism Flowers - 23
• L5 Blossoming Prism Flowers - 29
• L6 Gorgeous Prism Flowers - 36
• L7 Brilliant Prism Flowers - 42
• L8 Spectral Prism Flowers - 49
• L9 Glowing Prism Flowers - 55

ShimmeSecret Fountains

• L1 Fountain of Legend - 3
• L2 Ancient Spring - 15
• L3 Shimmering Spring - 45
• L4 Fountain of Faith - 75
• L5 Fountain of Rebirth - 105
• L6 Heroic Dragon Spa - 135
• L1 Secret Lifespring - 30
• L2 Spectral Lifespring - 150

Coin Vaults and Stone Yards

• L1 Tattered - 1
• L2 Basic - 5
• L3 Nice - 15
• L4 Great - 25
• L5 Opulent - 35
• L6 Mythical - 45
• L7 Gigantic - 55
• L8 Bottomless - 65

Chests (single tap only)

• Treasure Chests
  • L1 Ordinary Chest - 2
  • L2 Nice Chest - 5
  • L3 Chained Chest - 15
  • L4 Sunken Chest - 50
  • L5 Noble Chest - 165
  • L6 Glowing Chest - 530
  • L7 Giant Treasure Chest - 1690
• Grimm Chests
  • L1 Grimm Chest - 24
  • L2 Grimm Chest of Decay - 72
  • L3 Grimm Chest of Despair - 240
  • L4 Grimm Chest of Suffering - 792
• Season Chests
  • L1 Little Seasons chest - 10
  • L2 Big Seasons chest - 30
  • L3 Great Seasons chest - 100
  • L4 Magnificent Seasons chest - 330
• Materials Chests
  • Moon/Phobos Chests - 10/40
  • Golden/Solid Gold Chests - 25/80
  • Dangerous Chest/Chest of Beasts - 100/300
  • Occult/Summoned Chest - 270/820
  • Pearlescent/Spectral Chest - 435/1305
• Kala’s Rucksacks - 250
• Daily Chest (Super Egg Fragment) - 150
• Bountiful (aka Level or Timed) Chests - 150
• Chest of Stones - 10
• Chest of Nightstones - 50
• Super Nest Vault - 500
• Mega Nest Vault - 2500
• Ultra Nest Vault - 5000 (limited availability)
• Dragon Chests Note: Points depend on chest contents
  
  • Egg Chests - 30 to 80
  • Radiant Egg Chests - 80 to 120
  • Nest Vault - 150 to 200
  • Huge Nest Vault - 400 to 500

Camp and Chill Event Items

• Capsules - 0
• Pile of Camp Event Points - 5
• Great Rucksack of Event Points - 10 per tap, 20+ total
• Wondrous Chest of Event Points - 25 per tap, 125+ total
• Mythical Coffer of Event Points - 50 per tap, 450+ total

Miscellaneous Items

• Life Flower Seeds - 3
• Rain Clouds - 5
• Cloudy Summit - 11
• Misty Mountain - 35
• Ancient Dragon Skull - 5
• Unearthed Skeleton (aka Bone Pile) - 5
• Most Wonders - 100 per tap, totals vary
• Legendary Glowing Tree - 1087 per tap
• Shangri-La - 200
• The Last Relic Artefact - 330
• Mystic Lantern - 35 per tap, 105 total
• Totems (all) - 20 per tap
• Pile of Riches - 3 per tap
• Mound of Rich Stuff - 15 per tap
• Heap of Glimmering Riches - 45 per tap
• Mountain of Wild Riches - 75 per tap
• Evil Fog - 20 per section unlocked
• Dimensional Jars - varies based on the object
• Event Trophies - 25
  • Spawned items also give 25 points (both L1 and L2)
  • Exceptions: Pomegranate, Temple, and the Enormous Lucky Coins do not give points, nor do their tappables

Combo Merges Note: this is a partial list — most chains seem to work, with points increasing by item levels and length of chain.

• Coins - 5, 10, 30, 60 (started with L2)
• Life Flowers - 5, 10, 15, 20, 40 (start w/L1)
• Life Flowers - 15, 40 (started w/L5)
• Life Orbs - 5, 10, 15, 20, 40 (Started w/ heart)
• Life Orbs - 5, 20, 45, 80 (started w/ L3)
• Living Stones - 5, 10, 15, 40 (start w/fresh stones)
• Stone bricks - 5, 10, 15, 40, 60 (start w/L1)

No Points

• Currency (Coins, Stone Bricks, and Gems)
• Loot orbs
• Dragon Homes
• Haunted Houses
• Boutique exclusive chains
• Lobelia Topiaries
• Ornate/Jeweled Statues
• Small Fluffs
• Weekly Den Chests
• Dust Bunny Crates
• Chocolate Fountain chain
• Star Chests
• Star Dragon T2 nests
• Season Bonus Chests
• Newer items and any in limited release for beta testing

 

TROUBLESHOOTING

If the event is not showing up or glitches are affecting your play:

• Try hard closing and then relaunching your game.
• If your device is running hot, stop playing and allow it to cool down.
• Try rebooting your device (ie, turn it completely off, then back on and allow it to fully boot up before relaunching the game).
• Try rebooting your wifi router (if you have access).
• Try switching to a completely different internet source.
• If you’re suddenly experiencing multiple issues like lagging or error messages, close the game and try again after an hour or two; events are server-based, and sometimes activity on that end can cause temporary problems.
• If nothing here helps, contact Gram Games Support through the in-game link or the official website for help figuring out what’s wrong.

General Technical Warnings:

• Cloud Save is still unreliable: according to the developer, it is not safe to be used and should be left turned off.
• Den Chests: To reduce your risk of missing chests or uncounted points, avoid playing while game servers are processing the cycle change.
• Saving your Progress: Make sure you travel to the World Map screen before closing your game to save your progress; saving immediately after earning or making high-value items is also recommended.

Note: All initial event info is preliminary, based off what we’ve had in prior editions. Edits are ongoing

"Okay," Sookie called out. "That's a wrap!"
A ragged cheer went up from the cast and crew. Deacon walked around, clapping his hands and cheering loudly, making sure everyone else was cheering, too. Sookie walked over to her chair and sank into it, her feet throbbing in time to the cheering people around her. She smiled at anyone who caught her eye and just relaxed.
This was the end of a grueling, forty-five day shooting schedule that had been supposed to be ten hour days, but had ended up being more like thirteen to eighteen hour days for her. They weren't done filming the season. Far from it, in fact. But these were the worst shots, and the cast and crew involved had all agreed to push through hard until it was done. After this, they had about two more months of shooting on a more normal schedule, and then editing could begin.
Deacon, despite his enthusiasm for the end of the push, had not had to attend most of the shots they got, and had instead, been spending 'quality' time with a couple of local groupies and the White Lady. Sookie didn't begrudge him this, of course. She worried a little about the amount of booger sugar going up his nose at times, but his agent had repeatedly assured her that he was using far more often during shoots than during his off time.
Besides, it was only fitting that the star of the show should enjoy the fruits of his fame. Sookie herself had picked up a bisexual couple a week or two ago, when they had a shoot end 'early' (at nine PM) and the next's day's shoot wasn't scheduled to begin until eight AM. She had left set almost immediately and headed to a local gay bar, where someone had recognized her from her OnlyFans days and insisted upon introducing his boyfriend.
She sighed, remembering the sensation of two well-endowed men thrusting into her, and how she'd simply melted when the one behind her leaned forward and around to kiss the other. Bi men were soooo hawt...
She promised herself she'd try to find another bisexual 'gay' couple, now that she had the time.
Deacon had finally got everyone sufficiently enthusiastic -which was a credit to his charisma, really, as everybody was exhausted- and came over to sit next to her in his own chair.
"I am so ready for a couple weeks off," he said.
"It's one week," Sookie reminded him. "And then you need to be ready for the fight scenes. Have you been working with your choreographer?"
"I haven't really had the time..." Deacon whined, causing Sookie to sigh.
"Deek," she said, sitting up in her chair and turning to face him. "You haven't needed to be on set for the past two weeks. You've been coming to, in your own words, 'help keep morale up'. And while I do appreciate your efforts in that regards, it is far more important for you to be ready to shoot your fight scenes in a week. I'm serious here. You need to get with your choreographer and get your moves nailed down tight. We don't have time to push those shoots back any further."
Deacon held up his hands in surrender. "I'll be down at the dojo tomorrow, I swear."
"Tomorrow morning," Sookie insisted.
"Tomorrow morning," Deacon agreed. "In fact, I'm going to get the playbook and go over it tonight, to try to get a head start."
Sookie smiled and patted him on the knee as she rose. She didn't want to be here anymore. The PAs and crew could finish cleaning everything up so the teardown crews could get started tomorrow.
She found her personal assistant and instructed her to make sure everyone knew to do their own breakdowns, then left. Filming on set had certain advantages, including the fact that she was within walking distance of her hotel.
The security guard that Julie had insisted she maintain since that incident a few years ago with the psycho stan peeled herself off the wall she'd been holding up and fell into step behind her. Sookie wouldn't have minded so much, except Julie had carefully picked married, monogamous men and women to fill her security schedule with, to avoid any 'conflicts of interest'.
This gal, Linda Gottlieb, was probably the worst of all. She had a girlfriend and a boyfriend, and yet refused to sleep with anyone else. On top of that, she was as slender as Sookie, flat chested (which Sookie found to be a major turn on) and hard as a rock, with veiny arms and shoulders and even a few visible on her belly.
Sookie was a woman of many tastes, but skinny girls with visible veins and no tits were one of her more notable favorites, and so Linda's categorical refusal to so much as let Sookie slip a hand down her pants was grating.
Linda wasn't wearing a uniform. She wore a tight tank top and a loose flannel with the sleeves rolled up and the front unbuttoned over a pair of blue jeans and hiking boots. Sookie knew she had a gun on her somewhere, but couldn't speculate as to where.
Well, that's not true. Sookie imagined the handle sticking of her ass, riding up between the cheeks of that ass that all flat-chested women seemed to have that was categorically unfair to better-if-still-modestly endowed women like Sookie. She slowed down to get a peek at it.
"Looking at my ass again?" Linda asked.
"Yes," Sookie said. "I was wondering if you keep your gun there. The handle could fit between those cheeks and nobody would be the wiser."
Linda laughed and lifted her flannel to show a handgun tucked into her belt on her hip. "Sorry to disappoint," she said. "But I kinda need to keep it where I could easily get at it."
Sookie sighed, her pleasant illusion ruined.
They turned left out of the studio gates and walked up the road. Despite the presence of the studio, this was kind of a rough area, so Sookie appreciated having some security as she made the walk. Not that she couldn't handle herself, but she'd learned the hard way that being taken by surprise left her as vulnerable as anyone.
They hadn't gotten more than a half a block before a ragged looking man approached them, reeking of booze and shit. His clothes were filthy and torn and he had a scraggly beard that ranged from a centimeter to three inches long, seemingly at random.
"Spare a dollar?" he asked.
"No," Linda said, stepping forward to catch his attention so Sookie could slip past.
"S'just a dollar, lady. I'll lick your pussy for it!" The man leered at Linda, who didn't blink or flinch, but rather gave him a hard shove back.
"Don't you fucking crowd me, talking shit like that," she said menacingly, taking another step forward to keep him off balance.
"Be respectful," she added with force. The man looked like he wanted to argue, but something in the way she looked or held herself made it clear to him that Linda was not to be trifled with. He stepped back until his back was to the wall of the building behind him and watched as Linda turned and caught back up to Sookie, who was watching the whole thing over her shoulder.
"Fucking Dykes!" the man shouted. "Suck my dick!"
"You'd think that at least one of them would figure out that being aggressive like that doesn't work," Sookie mused.
"It doesn't work on you or me, but that's because we know we could take his head off if he tried to get violent," Linda said. "Most women aren't fighters. They'll give him cash just to get him to stop harassing them."
"Fair enough," Sookie said.
This was a common occurrence. Almost every time Sookie walked to her hotel, at least one homeless person would try to panhandle her. Sometimes, if she had any cash, she'd give them some. Once in a blue moon, one would engender enough sympathy for a good payout, a hundred bucks or so. But most of the time, they struck her as entitled ruffians, living on the street thanks to their own bad decisions and trying to get by on other people's labor.
She knew that was an old-fashioned mindset. She knew a lot of these people would, if they got clean of whatever they were using, sort out their lives and take care of business. She knew that the DCM Group even had a charitable arm who straight up gave condos and large sums of money to many homeless people, who immediately used that gift to get back on their feet. She knew the stats, too.
But this particular area seemed to attract the sort of homeless people whom right-wing motards used as an archetype for all homeless people. Twice, someone from the crew had been assaulted, causing Sookie to declare that she and the stunt coordinator were the only ones allowed to walk to and from the studio.
"I wonder if they're actually even homeless," Linda said, her thoughts echoing Sookie's.
"Me too," Sookie said. "I mean, it's a very poor neighborhood, adjacent to a place where very wealthy people work. There's no rule that says you have to be homeless to panhandle."
Linda nodded. Sookie wondered idly if she'd been following her own logic, or seeking out a belief that made her feel better about judging the people here. She wasn't sure which, really.
The area they moved through got progressively nicer as they continued. They turned the last corner, with three blocks still to go when Sookie saw the next one.
This one was older. he only had about a week's worth of beard on his face, though Sookie could see that it was mostly gray. He wore similar clothes to the other one, the once-vibrant colors having long since faded towards a muted gray tone. His clothes, however, looked cleaner and the holes had all been neatly stitched. As they drew close, Sookie could read his sign.
Please help Leave a dollar or take a resume Will work for food
Sure enough, he had a stack of resumes weighted down with a rock next to him. Sookie stopped, intrigued and bent down to retrieve one. She handed the man a folded ten dollar bill at the same time. A reward for creativity in his panhandling, she thought.
She looked at it. The man had a pair of enlistments in the Marine Corps at the top of his work experience. It was back in the early 2000s, and it mentioned Helmand Province, which Sookie recalled had been at the center of a lot of the fighting in Afghanistan.
The next few lines were security companies, starting with a high-end competitor to the Group, and then a long sequence of construction and day-labor work, ending on his current work, which was "Self Employed - Private Investigations". Below that, he had a string of qualifications, including armed security, close protection and bail enforcement.
"This is actually quite a good resume," Sookie told him. She glanced up at the top to get his name, Richard Nixon.
"Richard Nixon?" Sookie asked. "Like the president?"
Richard nodded. "I'll work," he said hopefully. "I can swing a hammer and do plumbing. I'll do a full day's work for lunch and dinner, or a hundred bucks, whichever you prefer."
Sookie handed the resume to Linda, who looked down at it.
"Ain't much different than mine," she said. "Oorah."
"Oorah," Richard muttered back, seemingly on pure instinct.
"So why are you out here, Richard?" Sookie asked. "Your resume says you're self-employed as a private eye."
Richard shrugged. Sookie noted the redness and swelling of his nose. "Work's been scarce," he said. "Been getting fewer jobs for the last few years. Fewer jobs means less money, less money means losing my office, not being able to afford nice clothes, which leads to fewer jobs."
Sookie looked a question at Linda, who shrugged. "We're always looking for investigators. It can be hard to recruit former cops, and those we do are often old enough not to stay on for more than a few years before retiring."
Sookie smiled and nodded, turning back to Richard. "You want an interview?"
"Hell yeah," he said with some enthusiasm. "As long as they don't mind me looking a little rough around the edges."
"Where do you live?" Sookie asked. Richard gestured around. "Lost my apartment last month," he said. Sookie pursed her lips and then nodded and held out a hand to him.
"Come on, Richard. I'm Sookie, and this is Linda. I'll make you a deal. I'll get you a nice outfit to wear and arrange an interview at the LA office tomorrow. I'll put you up on my couch for the night, too. That way, you can shower and shave and look presentable for it. What do you think?"
Richard took her hand and let her help him up. "Are you serious?" he asked. Sookie nodded.
"Holy crap, thank you, lady. Sookie, I mean. Thank you." His eyes began to get watery. "I don't... I don't even know what to say. That would be amazing."
Sookie smiled, her heart wrenching for the guy. She knew he had a drinking problem, but she also remembered all those people the Group's charities helped. Get someone on their feet, and there was a good chance they'd stay there.
"Do you have stuff to get?"
"I uh... I have a storage shed. It's paid up through the end of the year," he said. "My stuff is safe there, I just need to go get my toiletries."
"Don't worry about that," Sookie said, stepping to the edge of the sidewalk and waiting for the traffic to clear enough to cross the road. "We can stop by a drug store, too."
----
Sookie and Linda took Richard shopping and got him everything he needed. Which wasn't much, really. Sookie had a spare toothbrush, razors, shaving cream and cologne at her hotel room. It was all stuff she kept on hand to be the best slut she could be, and make her dishes du jour feel welcome. They bought him deodorant and an electric beard trimmer, and decided to take a pit stop at a hair and nails salon next to the pharmacy.
The girls there had cooed and gooed over Sookie and Linda helping this man out, and refused to accept any money for the trim he got. Unfortunately, they weren't set up to shave a man (all of the other clients inside were women), but Richard protested that he was perfectly capable of shaving himself, so it all worked out.
The next stop was, at Sookie's insistence, one of the ultra-high-end men's clothing stores near her hotel. Linda had protested that simply taking a car to Walmart would be good enough, but Sookie would have none of that.
"Linda, it's been over six years since I've seen a person in Walmart that I'd be willing to give a handy to. It's been even longer since I've seen any clothing there that looked like it didn't come from Walmart, especially the suits. We're not going to Walmart."
As a result, Richard got fitted for a custom-tailored suit and outfitted with a tie that was a pleasant, deep blue, bespeckled with tiny, gold-embroidered Marine Corps logos. He seemed pleased with it, and had to keep wiping his eyes as he repeatedly and profusely thanked her.
When all was done, they finally went to the hotel. Sookie had a full suite on the top floor. It wasn't the biggest suite, but it was close, with two spare bedrooms, a living room and a full kitchen, in addition to a balcony that afforded her a great view of the city (so long as the smog wasn't too bad) and a private elevator to the rooftop pool.
Linda took her usual spot at the door to await her relief for the evening while Sookie showed Richard the large bathroom and made sure he had everything he needed. While he showered and shaved, she decided to review the script.
She walked over to the safe in the living room and carefully punched in her combination on the keypad.
The scripts for The Legend of Jimmy were like solid gold. Every studio out there wanted to get their hands on one, to steal ideas from. Every fan wanted to get one, just for the thrill of knowing what was going to happen next. During the second season's filming, they'd had multiple scripts stolen and leaked, and Sookie had learned to crack down on that. As a result, she was the only one who ever had a full set of scripts for any given season. She kept them safely under lock and key at all times.
She pulled out her working copy, which was different from the 'archive' copy she also kept in the safe. The working copy had all of her handwritten notes on it. She closed the safe back up and locked it, then sat down at the table and flipped open to the scenes they would be filming after the break. Using a red pen, she made notes for herself, things to remember during shooting, like camera angles and notes on the VFX.
She heard the shower turn off, but she was engrossed in her work when the door opened.
"Thanks again," Richard said, causing her to look up. He had a towel around his waist, but Sookie noted that he had a lean torso, with some muscle still there, despite a rough life. Clean shaven now, he looked much better. He'd never get a gig as a model, but he was handsome enough in his own way. Sookie smiled at him.
"You don't have to keep thanking me," she said. "I'm happy to help."
She closed her script and stood, walking it over to the safe. Obscuring her hands with her body, she punched in the code again and placed the script inside. She hadn't yet closed the door when she heard Richard mutter "Oh shit."
She turned to look and froze. He'd turned back towards the bathroom, and then dropped his towel by accident. He was currently in the process of picking it up, affording Sookie a great view of his ass and what might well have been considered a third leg hanging from between the other two.
It came almost to his knees.
A flush of heat went through her, washing away all thoughts of largess and generosity, and kindling a very selfish desire. She heard the spattering on the hardwood floor where she crouched as her usual over-the-top wetness kicked into high gear and soaked through her pants in seconds. She could feel herself throbbing as she eyed Richard's enormous member.
Her disguise slipped and the horns erupted from her head, her tail curled up painfully inside her pants and her skin turned red, with large patches of scales. Operating purely on instinct, she magicked up a veil of mundanity. She didn't want Richard to freak out, and this would keep him from registering her appearance as anything out of the ordinary.
He retrieved his towel and made to wrap it back around his waist, but Sookie shot to her feet and spun, already ripping her shirt off.
"Wait," she said. Richard froze, then turned to look at her over one shoulder. She tossed her shirt on the couch and peeled off her pants. She wasn't wearing any underwear or bra, of course. She never did.
"I just thought of a way you could thank me," she purred, taking a languid step forward. Richard reacted immediately to the sight of her naked, turning, his hog's leg stiffening and rising from its vertical hang slightly.
"Are you, uh... I mean... I'm not..." Richard stammered. Sookie stepped closer to him and put her hands on his shoulder, then ran them down his chest.
"I am damn sure I want to do this, if that's what you're asking," she said, her hands reaching lower as she stepped close enough to press her breasts into his ribs. She took hold of him and felt him grow almost immediately rock hard as he gasped.
"Wow," he said. "This is... This is like something from a porno with a bad script..." he said.
"Uh huh," Sookie said. "And we're about to do the fun parts of it." She pressed her lips into his, and then squealed in delight as he grabbed her by the ass and hoisted her up.
"Where?" he asked into her mouth.
"Pussy, mouth and ass," she replied. She felt the heat rush through his cheeks.
"I meant where in this room," he said.
"I don't fucking care," Sookie responded, lining his huge cock up with her most convenient hole and squirming down onto it with a loud gasp.
"In the bedroom!" Linda shouted. "Please, for the love of god, in the bedroom!"
----
Sookie awoke the next morning and rolled over to see if Richard was up for a little wake-and-shake. Her hands slapped the empty bed and she pouted.
"Richard?" she called, a wonderful aroma meeting her nose as she did. "Are you making coffee already? I'll fall in love with you, or deepthroat you, your choice, if you are!"
He didn't answer.
She opened her eyes and saw that his new suit was missing. An empty hanger was hooked to the coathanger next to the closet. She climbed out of bed, frowning, and walked out into the living room.
It was empty. She could smell the coffee even stronger, and she walked into the kitchen to find the coffee pot full and a business card sitting next to it. She picked it up and peered at it with sleep-bleary eyes.
"Eric Stephens, Private Investigations, Corporate Espionage, Bail Bonds, Security Consultation," she read out loud. There was a QR code on it, so she picked up her phone from where it had been flung to the floor last night and scanned it. While the page loaded, she glanced in the bathroom to see Richard's old clothes still piled there.
She glanced at her phone to see a very clean-shaven and well-dressed Richard smiling at the camera at the top of a very tastefully designed web page. She scrolled through it for a moment, confused. This was clearly him, but why had he given her a fake name? She supposed he could have had this nice website built back when he was still working enough to afford it, but... It seemed off. It didn't fit. Sookie didn't get it.
That was, until she looked to her own pile of clothes by the safe and saw the door still hanging open. With a gasp, she rushed over only to find the safe empty. Both of her scripts were gone!
"Shit!" she shouted.
The door opened and a large, muscular man dressed like a lawyer rushed in, a gun in hand.
"Miss Ohma, is everything all right?" he asked after scanning the room and peering through the open doors.
"No," Sookie wailed. "I just got my scripts stolen!"
"The gentleman who left this morning?" her guard asked. She nodded. "I'm so sorry, Miss Ohma. I would have stopped him if I knew."
"No, you did fine," Sookie said as her eyes filled with frustrated tears. "You're used to men heading out in the morning. Usually they do it after I wake up and we can get another good fuck in, but still... You didn't do anything wrong."
"He left a note," the guard said. "I saw it taped to the inside of the door." Sookie looked over and saw a folded piece of paper taped there. She stalked over and ripped it down, sniffling angrily and wiping at her eyes to read it.

 Dear Sookie, Last night was probably the best night I've had in my life. It's certainly the best night I can remember. If you ever want to do it again, just let me know. I left you a card by the coffee machine, and there's a full pot for you, as well. If you don't ever want to see me again, well, I guess I understand. I'm sorry to have left the way I did, but I'm a man of my word, and my client was willing to pay a lot of money for that script. I hope this doesn't hurt you too much. For what it's worth, I'm sorry if I upset you. Wishing you all the best, Eric 

Sookie crumbled up the paper and angrily threw it across the room.
"Motherfucker!" she shouted. The guard winced, but said nothing.
"He scammed me," Sookie said. "Got a nice new suit out of me, seduced me with that redwood growing between his legs and then ran off with my fucking scripts!"
She let her claws form and dug them into her thighs, carving bloody furrows that healed almost as fast as she made them. The guard started and rushed over.
"Ma'am, please," he said. "I'm not supposed to let you hurt yourself."
Sookie let him pull her hands up to her chest. She leaned into him for a moment. "You're married, aren't you?" she said.
"Uh, no," he said. Sookie turned her head to regard him. She didn't recognize him. "What's your name?"
"Devin, Ma'am," he said. "Devin Iglesias. This is my first shift on your detail."
"Who put you on this shift?"
"Uhh, Missus Williams. She said I'd enjoy this detail, and I agreed. I'm a huge fan of your show, Miss Ohma."
"Are you gay?" Sookie asked. Devin blinked. "Uh, no, Ma'am."
Sookie smiled. "I need you to do two things," she said.
"The second, and most important thing, I need you to call the office and ask for any information they have on a private investigator named Eric Stephens who works out of LA."
Devin nodded. "Yes, ma'am. And the first thing?"
Sookie smiled wider. "I need you to find out the real reason why Inanna thought you'd enjoy this posting."

First / Previous / Next
The group of Administrators - former Administrators? No, I'll still need Administrators. These though? Maybe? - leads us through the promenade of the Starbase, past the gawking crowds. Now that they're pretty sure I'm not going to start a riot or a war, I have a lot more curious onlookers following a... respectful distance behind. We continue on through the promenade towards a...
group of shops?
They're small, ramshackle shops, selling hot food and other small trinkets. If tourists came to this Starbase, I'd call it a tourist trap but I have a feeling that many locals rely on places like this for their daily meals no matter how much the Aviens and Mariens say there is plenty of food.
We stand in front of a shop where one of the Insect people is frying something in a large, shallow pan with a flame under it. Oh!
"Rapid River Roaring, what is the name of this species of sapient?" I ask.
"They are known to us as Azurians."
I look at the Azurian. They are making small efficient movements, transferring food to the large fryer, turning them quickly, and then another moves the cooked food to a rack to dry.
"Good day, may I have one of those?" I ask gently.
"2 Skys, exact change." They say without looking up. I make a show of patting my pockets dramatically, and then look at The Smell Of the Ocean and raise an eyebrow.
"You stand in the presence of a Builder! Know your place!" He barks at the Azurian at the fryer.
The Azurian lazily looks up at them, then over at me with my royal blue outfit and crown and wings, and then back to The Small Of the Ocean and says "1 Sky then. Discount."
I tip my head back and laugh. Really, I love these Azurians. I need to make sure they're taken care of. They don't care a single bit about who I am. I look again at Ocean and say "Well? Pay them please. I would like to try what they're cooking."
Ocean looks at me with a shocked expression. I'm sure they had not planned on this when their day started, but even for that they're still surprised.
You are not how they expect a Builder to be.
Good. Maybe they'll stop trying to treat me like they already know how I'm going to react.
Ocean takes out a small purse and digs around and takes out a small, green, metallic coin. They plunk it into the box next to the fryer, and the Azurian who was removing the cooked treats hands me one. It's hot and oily and crunchy and delightful.
"These are so good!" I say around a mouthfull of food. I swallow and look at the Azurians cooking. "Thank you so much, those are amazing." I turn to Ava, Mei and Fer'resi. "You need to try these. Ocean, buy three more!"
The Azurian looks up again. "2 Skys each since they're not Holy."
I look at Ocean again and raise an eyebrow. They dive into their purse and pull out six more coins. Three fried treats are produced, and everyone tries them.
Ava gobbles hers down. "Melody! You're right, these are amazing! We have to make sure we can get more from them. I wonder if they'll give us the recipe?"
"Probably, but I know we can't get the ingredients back home." I say with a smile.
"Well then, we'll just have to stay here. These are worth opening up a trade relationship with the folks at home. Mel, Fer'resi, what do you think?"
I look over and the food is gone. Both of them practically inhaled them. Mei'la is grinning "Melody they're amazing! They taste...familiar. Like a food we eat during one of the festivals."
Fer'resi nods. "It's very similar to the fried treats we eat during... The Ceasing." He thinks a moment.
"The Ceasing?" I ask.
"These days, it's a harvest holiday. When the work in the fields cease and we take a week or two before rotating to our next fields so as to not overwork the soil. It's a time to get together with family and have a party, visit with your neighbors, that kind of thing. There were records of the holiday being related to something else in the old religion, but most people figured it was always a harvest holiday, but now I wonder."
"What, like celebrating the closure of the Gate?" I ask.
"Yes, maybe it originally celebrated when the Builders ceased coming."
Fer'resi looks at his empty skewer thoughtfully. "Well, we can research the history of K'laxi religion later I suppose. And as delicious as these were, why are we here?"
Actually, he's right. I turn to Ocean. "Other than the snack break, why are we here, Ocean?"
With a sigh, he walks between the stands. We follow.
The people running the stands stare as we weave through them, but nobody stops us or even asks what we are doing. The benefits of being a Builder with the station Administrators I guess. We reach the wall behind the stands and The Smell of the Ocean looks at Rapid River Roaring. "It's around here, isn't it?"
Rapid River Roaring nods "Yes, but neither we or any of the Mariens could work out how to open it." They turn to look at me. "Empress, the entrance to the Throne is around here, but as we are not Builders...we don't know how to open the door."
I look out at the wall. It looks ancient. Like it's been here forever. Soot and dust cling to the walls. There has to be a switch or a lever or something right?
No. It's designed for a Builder to open.
Yes, but I've been a builder for what, two full days at this point and Empress for one? I don't know what I'm doing.
Think like an Empress. Think like a Builder.
Ugh, that doesn't help. Everything I've felt so far as shown me that they're self righeous, demanding people who just... get what they... want.
Is it really that easy?
I look up at the wall again. We seem to be in the middle as near as I can tell. Over on one side, it goes for 10 meters or so and then ends in a decoration that looks a little like a pillar. I turn and look at the other side and... yes, it's the same.
This isn't a wall, it's the door.
I look at the door now, and think about it. It looks like it would slide into the floor, or up into the ceiling. I bet it hasn't been opened in centuries. I don't want to hurt anyone who has set up shop here.
Think like a Builder, Melody. What do Builders do? They Build.
Okay okay. Let's think. If I have enough Nanites that I can make clothes for myself and my friends and I can make a frigging glowing crown and wings then there is probably enough to be able to...
I look at the wall and concentrate. Think like a Builder they say. Fine.
A breeze erupts from me and a light fog flows around my feet towards the wall. It clings to the wall until it covers an area that would be a comfortable doorway. A moment passes, and
"Hey, a door!" Ava says. "How did you do that?"
I turn back to her and wink. "I'm a Builder. I have no idea." Ava giggles.
Mei'la looks at the hole. "What happened to the matter in the wall? You can't just make it disappear.
Hmm, I look around, the walls didn't seem to get thicker, and I don't think I took the wall material and rebuilt it into more nanites, but the floor... sure is dusty.
"Look at the floor Mei'la, I think it's dust now."
Drifts of dust blew at our feet as she looked. I guess it was the same color of the wall. That must be it.
I walk over to my new opening and stand there. It smells of stale air and dust. There are no lights and no air movement.
"Come on everyone, let's walk purposefully into the dark and scary hole I made into the wall without really having a good understanding about what I'm doing or how I did it!" I call out to everyone as I go through the door.
The light from the market illuminates a small patch in front of me. It's just bare, dusty floor. I look up and see... nothing. Okay, okay, think like a Builder, act like I own the place.
Because - in a very real sense - you do.
Okay, first thing I want are lights. I think about how I'd want it to be lit, and concentrate and...
There is a loud, distant humming sound and with a dramatic flourish, lights come on in the room, just the color I was thinking.
Ava pushes her way in behind me and stops dead. "Melody... is that your Throne?"
It's breathtaking. About 100 meters from us, nearly 10 meters over our heads is what can really only be described as a Throne, A wide staircase leads up to it with platforms every 10 steps or so.
The Throne itself is... massive. It's a chair made of green shimmering metal. Towering and spindly, it reaches up behind where the Empress would sit, almost organically, towards the ceiling. Touching the ceiling it spreads and branches like the roots of a tree and disappears into the ceiling. I think it's connected. Maybe data connections? It is clearly meant to impress.
Doesn't look too comfortable to sit in though.
"I think it is, Ava. At least the Throne for this Starbase. The Nanites tell me every Starbase has one."
"Do they all look like this?" She looks around, eye wide.
"I don't know. I suppose in time, I'll go and find out."
Mei'la comes in and hearing that turns to me, "So, you're going to stay? Be their Empress? After how many millennia of them not having one you'll just... show up and say 'Hey, I'm in charge now' ?"
It is your right.
"I-I think that I can do some real good here" I say, weakly.
You don't need to justify it to them.
"How Melody? You're an Information Warfare Officer, you never even had a command."
You are a Builder.
"But, look at the people here, look at the Aviens and Mariens who are in charge hate each other! It won't be long before they start shooting each other!" I'm feeling panicked and I don't know why. Mei'la is right, what am I doing?
She is nothing. You are everything
Mei'la crosses her arms. "The only person who has said that they hate each other is you Melody. Nobody else on FarReach who has been to the station has seen it."
They can't see. They won't see.
I look out through the door to the promenade. "The people that live here sure don't look like they're living a free and easy life. We met a slave! Those food vendors we bought treats from sure don't look rich to me. If you look around it looks like... poverty. Like people barely hanging on. I can fix that."
Mei'la keeps staring at me. "How Melody? How will you fix it? You don't know the first thing about how to rule."
I whirl around "Do you? Please, enlighten me then." Wow, I almost used the Voice. I have to be more careful. That was close.
I throw up my hands. "So, what do you expect me to do then, just... go home? With all this that's happened to me, with all that's been given to me, to just waste it on tricks and being able to watch movies without the subtitles? Dr. Irenimum says the Nanites can't be turned off. So now I live for who knows how long with the full package giving me the ability, the knowledge and the power to rule and... I don't?"
Mei'la looks at me, eyes wide. "Melody, what are you saying?"
Ava stands next to me and puts a hand on my shoulder. "She's saying she's an Empress now, and she intends to rule."
I nod without thinking. Ava gets it. Ava gets me. No, wait. What's going on, what am I doing? Ugh, I need a minute to think, my head hurts.
Mei'la turns away and looks over at Fer'resi. "Fer'resi, you talk some sense into her. She isn't interested in listening to me."
Hey, wait a minute, that's not fair
"Hey Mei'la, that doesn't seem fair. I've got... a lot of stuff that I've just been introduced to. I need time to... process it."
"Fine then, let's head back to FarReach, we can process it while we go to the next system." She turns to leave.
Ņ̶̛̞̬̲̪̲̝͑́͆̈́͌̈́̊͝ͅȍ̸̡̞̫̖͕͈̮͌̍̆́͌͗͛͛͒̌͘!̶̢̛̫̦̺̣͍͕͇̳̟̂̊̓̀̕͜͝
She stops without thinking. She turns and looks at me, fearful.
I clap a hand over my mouth. Uh oh.
"Sorry! Sorry! What I mean is... No. I'm going to stay here and think things through. You can head back to FarReach if you want." I look at everyone "You can all leave, you're free to go anytime, But I'm going to keep going and see what's here for me. I need to do this."
The moment I say they're free to go, the Aviens and Mariens with me bolt. They run away as fast as they can. Ugh, good Empresses don't have their subjects run from them in terror, do they?
No, **Great **Empresses do.
Mei'la looks at me sadly. "Goodbye, Melody." and turns to leave. Fer'resi looks at her, then back at me, then at her. "I-I'm sorry Melody." He stammers "I-I-I need to get back to FarReach and... learn more about these translators you got us. Thank you for them, and for showing us how to wear them." Looking back one more time he leaves.
Ava smoothly transitions her hand on my shoulder into a hug. "You aren't getting rid of me that easily. I'm here to see this through. This is too cool just to give it all up and go back to FarReach and continue on like nothing's wrong." I lean into the hug. Ava knows what I need right now.
She's right. See it through.
Fine. If I'm the Empress, then I'll be the Empress. With newfound determinization, I walk up the stairs. I approach the throne and look at it.
There's no dust.
It's completely clean, how did they manage that trick? I'll have to ask the Nanites later. I turn and plant my rear end into the Throne.
I lean back in shock and gasp.
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