Do you think it's possible that someone can have pretty good values (honesty, fairness, respect, taking responsibility etc.) but for narcissistic reasons? Or their narcissism gets in the way?
I've just been badly burned by a friend who seemed to embody these things (to the extent that if he did something wrong by me and I called him on it he'd take responsibility, seem to really understand, and not do it again) and he certainly expects these things from others. He is so consistent in these things, both in front of me and others, that I really believe they're his values rather than artifice.. Like, I think he sees these things as important rather than just knowing other people think they're important so he's pretending. But I wonder if rather than doing them because he intrinsically wants to, he does them because he thinks they're what makes up a good person, and it's more of an ego drive to see himself as a good person.
I ask this because he way overpromised on his commitment to me and to supporting me, and underdelivered when I was hurt by him. Usually when he hurt me he'd acknowledge and apologise and support me. But recently I've been unwell in a way that was partially caused by my abandonment issues (which I own) and partially caused by him handling a change in our relationship pretty poorly. He supported me really well for a few weeks, but seemed to tire of this a lot faster than what i would have expected given how close our friendship had seemed, and he is now painting me as a villain who has been exerting a huge emotional toll on him, and he's now cut me off.
I have needed a fair bit of support (actually what I've needed is reassurance about my place in his life) and I know that's tiring, but it hasn't been anywhere near as one-sided 'taking'/exploitation as he's making it out to be. And again, he had previously led me to believe he loves the shit out of me and would support me through anything.
My therapist thinks that because I'm hurting because of him, he feels like the bad guy. Which has been okay in the times he could apologise and fix it really easily and restore his sense of being the good guy. But because he's badly hurt me and because I'm not just getting over it as quick as he wants, he can't just get himself back to good guy and its too threatening to his ego to continue sitting in it, and so the easier thing is to villainise me and position the support I've needed as excessive/abusive/disrespectful. And although i have been asking a fair bit of him it certainly hasn't been abusive, and I've held a lot of compassion for his predicament and expressed a lot of appreciation for his help. When I'd thank him for helping me through a crisis period, he'd say things like 'I wouldn't have it any other way'. His tone and patience got worse and worse though.
So I guess here's my question.. Has anyone had experiences with people who genuinely are not bad people and have good values, UNTIL embodying those values threatens their egos too much? It's been so crazy-making to not be able to reconcile how much he'd seemed to be a really ethical person, not just on a surface level, and be so caring in other situations, and then turn around and run out of compassion so quickly on this one. With how sick of me he seemed to be getting and how uncomoassionate he was getting, I even wondered why he stuck around as long as he did. But now I think he stuck around because he believed it was the 'right' thing to do, and didn't want to face what it would say about him and his 'goodness' if he ditched me after hurting me.. Until he realised he could villainise me and make it my fault and not his.
For context, he openly says "I'm narcissistic" and that he thinks embodying these values makes him better than other people. I just thought it didn't matter if he was a bit high on himself because his fundamental values were caring and pro-social. Now I'm thinking that he does believe those things and did actually love and care about me, but now that I'm threatening his ego rather than boosting it, by forcing him to reckon with how he's let me down and hurt me, in a way that he can't just fix and feel like the hero again, I'm not worth it. Basically, I think he did love and care for me, but no amount of love and care for someone will eclipse his need to maintain his ego.
A lot of the stuff in this subreddit is a lot more clear-cut abusive narcissism, so I want to know if anyone has been similarly burned by an 'ethical' narcissist?

Hi all, sorry I’m sure this is posted somewhere but I couldn’t find it. I want to put both my Roth and 403b in target date funds for my long term investing. I’m having trouble with the interface of doing that if anyone could point me in the right direction that would be fantastic. Thank you!

Anyone has experience with contra+extension case? Partner and I recently signed (mid April) an agreement for a contra with 3 months extension and was given a 50 days period to submit application. We were agreeable to allow sellers to find their next flat in the 50 days, but sellers took their time, went holiday, and haven’t found their next place. Right now, it’s nearing 50 days and we are submitting the application. However, seller’s agent informed us that HDB may take up to 14 weeks (instead of the initial 8 weeks) to approve the contra because sellers have not found a place, so may “allow” or take another month to approve contra so that sellers have time to find a place. Is this typical?
It seems to me agent is delaying contra submission from his side because seller has not found a place. It’s getting frustrating because the initial stipulated period of getting the place was mid October (which included the 3 months extension) is now stipulated at November. We are worried that agent might try to stretch out the timeline longer for the sellers, and we are left waiting without a clear timeline.
Any advice or insight would be great!

A match asked me where I lived and i told her “Near x zone” and in the night i saw her distance getting shorter, and shorter. Freakead out and deleted the match, but idk if they can get my location like that. It wasnt a verified profile, and she didint respond after i told her.

InvestorPlace technology expert Luke Lango has held an important live event. Let’s go ahead and view the video:
2023 Tech Melt + Readers questions - 1Hr 15 Mins long (Presentation & Offer for Early Stage Investor)
Our world will exit this decade appearing dramatically different than how we entered it, all because of artificial intelligence (AI).
This technology presents an enormous “before-and-after” paradigm shift that will disrupt/revolutionize nearly every aspect of our day-to-day lives.
From a business perspective, the tidal wave of capital that will flood into AI over the next 10 years will be like nothing our economy has ever seen.
As a result, from an investor perspective, today’s well-placed investments in the AI-leaders of tomorrow will turn into multi-million-dollar windfalls.
Luke’s event focused on helping investors understand the sheer size of this societal change, the enormity of the investment opportunity, and the right action steps to take today.
Here’s Luke:
I truly believe that, thanks to the emergence of artificial intelligence (AI), we face one of the most seminal moments for the economy ever.
And investors who recognize the importance of this moment – and seize the opportunities it presents – will make fortunes over the next few years…
Let me abundantly clear: AI is the biggest technological paradigm shift we’ve ever seen in our lifetimes.

Wrapping your head around what’s coming with AI

Chances are, you’ve used ChatGPT. If so, you know how incredible it is.
But for some mindboggling perspective, remember that this is the worst version of the technology that will ever exist. In a couple of years, today’s version will seem stupid – even inept – compared to the enhanced model we’ll be using.
To understand why, we must grasp the basics of AI.
AI consists of incredibly powerful algorithms that gather, sift, sort, and contextualize data to generate insights, draw conclusions, and make predictions.
If there were no data, then these AI models couldn’t do anything. As such, data is the lifeblood of AI. Or as Luke calls it, the “fuel.”
Here’s Luke with more:
What happens when you give a car 10X more fuel? It drives 10X farther.
What happens when you give an AI model 10X more data? It becomes 10X better.
And over the next few years, AI models will have more than 10X more data than they have access to today.
That’s not an exaggeration. That’s a fact.
In 2020, the total volume of data created worldwide was 47 zettabytes. By 2030, that volume will exceed 600 zettabytes.
That’s a 13X increase – and, by extension, a potential 13X increase in AI capability.
Folks, these AI models are only going to get way better over the next five to 10 years.
You think it’s impressive that law firms are already using AI to write briefs or that hospitals are using AI to diagnose diseases?
We’re just getting started.

Similar to the internet explosion in the 1990s, AI will create a stark divide separating the businesses and investors who benefit from the technology from those who get left behind

One of our biggest weaknesses as investors is that we’re not great at envisioning the future.
Think back to the 1990s…
As you drove to your local Blockbuster to rent a videocassette for the evening, could you have imagined the company going bankrupt because of a technology that would enable you to “stream” a movie straight to your home television, without driving anywhere or renting a physical product of any kind?
As you stood in line at your local Borders Books (remember that one?) to buy the latest James Patterson mystery, could you envision the company being driven out of existence by online book stores and e-readers?
Or what about your family summer road trip? Do you remember using a physical map?
No Millennial will ever understand the particular pain of trying to fold a map with one hand while speeding along some back road, totally lost, all because you missed a turn. As I look back now, spoiled by GPS, a 1990s road-trip seems downright barbaric.
Well, the future that’s coming with AI will bring its own jaw-dropping advancements. As investors, we must do our best to envision this and place our money ahead of these advancements. After all, this time around, it’s not just a wave of new innovation, but a 1,000-foot tsunami.
Back to Luke:
AI will be used to power a whole all sorts of technologies – robotic landscapers, delivery drivers, pilots, waiters, and more.
AI will be used to diagnose, prescribe, and treat patients for all sorts of ailments.
It will trade stocks, create music and movies, write articles, code, concoct new recipes, and make fabulous drinks. It will clean, repair, and restore cars, homes, and just about every object you can think of.
This is an “Everything Revolution.”
AI will permeate every industry of the economy. This revolution will leave no stone unturned. By 2030, every company in every sector of every country will use AI.
If you need convincing of this, just track the money flow.
Luke highlights a brand-new Bloomberg Intelligence research report concluding that just one portion of the AI economy – generative AI – will grow by more than 40% per year, reaching $1.3 trillion by 2032.
And here we are today, at the 1-yard-line, able to align our wealth with this avalanche of growth.

Luke sees investors falling into one of two camps

Here in 2023, it’s been a tale of two markets…
You’ve either been in tech/AI and made big returns, or you’ve been in anything else and more than likely made next-to-nothing or even lost money.
To illustrate, we need look no further than the Nasdaq 100 and the Dow Jones.
The tech-heavy Nasdaq 100 is up 33% while the Dow is up 1%.
Luke sees this as just the beginning. But for every bit as exciting as the enormous return potential of top AI stocks is, the risk of anemic returns from “old economy” stocks is concerning.
Here’s how Luke sizes up this divide:
Invest in the right AI stocks, and you’ll find yourself on the winning side of this massive technological paradigm shift.
Invest in the stocks that artificial intelligence will kill, and you may never recover.
It’s really that simple. And urgency is required because just as AI is already here, this stock market divide is, too.
Luke highlights the same night-and-day difference in 2023 market returns we just noted above, then says that this divide will only become larger in the years to come.

Watch Luke's presentation for all the details of this paradigm shift, as well as how to position your portfolio today

This isn’t the same as the computer… or the internet… or smartphones.
It’s bigger – for both good and bad.
AI will end certain diseases… destroy entire sections of our labor force…transform certain day-to-day tasks that are just normal parts of our lives today…
And for investors who invest in this trend early, it will generate mind-boggling investment wealth.
I’ll give him the final word:
AI is the biggest technological paradigm shift we’ve ever seen in our lifetimes.
Over the next several years, AI will sweep across society and will change everything about everything. For some, this will present a huge opportunity. For others, it will create a huge threat.
I wouldn’t be surprised if, in five years, AI stocks are up 400% or 500% while every other stock is pretty much flat, if not down.

My partner is a dual Canadian-American citizen who will be working as a post-doc in the States come September. I'd like to come with her, so we are trying to figure out the best way for me to obtain permission to live and work in the States. We're not currently married, but are planning on marriage in the near future. What visa options are possible for me in this situation?

Hi guys!! I will be a senior this year studying accounting. I’m looking for 1 or 2 female roommates to lease/sublease a 2B/2B or 3B/3B with for the school year. Would even be open to a 4B/4B.
Roommate wise: looking for people who can maintain a clean common space and keep it relatively quiet during the weekdays (go crazy on weekends! I don’t care). I’m super clean, I will always do my dishes and make the kitchen spotless after using it and I usually vacuum every weekend.
Apartment wise: There must be a parking spot, in unit laundry, and have our own bathrooms. I’m looking for something safe/modern and on campus (near green st/quad). Budget is around $900-$1000 max with utilities/parking.
I’m easy going and studious, but I also love to have a good time. Ideally I would like to become good friends with my roommates but we can also just coexist :)) I am always down to go out, study together, or have cooking nights!!
Message me if you are interested!!

My bf & I (24f, 26m) have been together for 8 months now, and things between the two us have been really good so far. However, I’m starting not to like his mom. I went into this with the utmost respect for both of his parents but after getting to know his mom, I just feel like her behavior is really weird. His mom lives in a different state than we do, but she’s here visiting my bf for a week (his dad is a very nice man btw, I really like him!). We went & had brunch and dinner with them Sunday, and during that time she made a number of comments that rubbed me the wrong way.
Comment 1: My bf and I have two separate apartments in the same complex because we didn’t want to move in together too soon. His mom insinuated during dinner that he spends too much time with me & at my place in general, and that he should spend some time alone at his own place. I didn’t have much of an issue with this because I agree, but I did have an issue with the accusatory subtext of the conversation. I feel like she was trying to say I was forcing him to be here at my place when that couldn’t be further from the truth. He chooses to spend the majority of his time here, I definitely don’t force that on him.
Comment #2: She said (basically verbatim) that she thinks he takes me out too much to restaurants, and that we should develop some kind of 50/50 rule moving forward so that he pays the tab sometimes & I pay the tab others. I have no issue with this, but it’s 9 times out of 10 my bf’s choice to eat at restaurants. I’m used to cooking & I usually do that 6 days out of the week. She even said that any woman who cares about their significant other will also care about their finances. What she said wouldn’t have rubbed me the wrong way if we didn’t already have an agreement with taking turns paying for food, and more importantly if it’s my idea to get food I know it’s my responsibility to pay. I didn’t really like that she had it in her mind that I’m a burden on him financially when I’m not. I’ve been taking care of myself since before her son came along just fine. I also had an issue with him not correcting her in the moment, which I voiced to my bf.
Comment #3: As we were leaving dinner, his mom also mentioned how she had paid for all of us at brunch & dinner and spent nearly $300. The way I was raised, it’s considered tacky to bring up money. I feel like if she had a problem paying she could’ve voiced that at the moment. I might not be explaining it well, but I felt like it was really passive aggressive to bring up the exact amount. Due to this, I already told my bf that the remainder of the time his parents are here I won’t allow them to spend another penny on me, because I don’t want anything thrown back in my face later.
Comment #4: On the way home, I pointed out some apartments that me & my bf were considering moving into together once our current leases are up. Seconds after I said this, I heard her sigh really dramatically & say to her husband, “Pray for me.” I thought this was probably the weirdest of her comments and it really made me wish I hadn’t said anything at all about our future plans. Later that night my bf mentioned to her that I was upset by her reaction & she said she just wasn’t prepared to hear that in the moment, which is totally understandable but still a rude reaction in my opinion.
I should probably also mention that when me & my bf first started dating, I overheard her refer to me as “that girl”, to which my bf did correct her which I appreciated. I think I knew then that I wasn’t dealing with an average mom. She has also made it a point to mention on multiple occasions that she “doesn’t get involved with her son’s gfs”, which made me feel uneasy.
I’m sorry this turned out to be super long. I guess I just need advice to see if I’m being overly sensitive? Or is this an issue that will continue looming on? I’m not sure how to move forward with my bf knowing I have this problem with his mom.

I'm (f21) on 8mg abilify, 50mg pristiq, and recently 25mg seroquel. It's also worth noting I'm on Yamin birth control as well.
i recently underwent a massive series of life changes. i started a new job may 1, my partner (m25) of 3 years and i broke up a month ago tomorrow, and i moved out of the apartment we shared for a year with a roommate (f22) on may 28th.
I now live with a brand new person who i consider to be my closest friend right now. i may be transferring schools as i live near a different university in our city now.
needless to say this triggered a manic episode while moving that I'm now crashing from. I'm missing work. I'm vaping more than ever.
I'm between psychiatrists right now. my old psych retired a few months ago without telling me after discharging me a year prior. i only found out because my prescription got canceled. I'm now working with my family doctor to come up with a treatment plan. I hadn't been sleeping well, hence the seroquel prescription.
my question is whether anyone notices a difference between brand name and generic with any of these medications, but specifically abilify as generic was given to me in place of brand name around the middle of the month when i picked up my prescriptions.
I'm also wondering whether the seroquel is the best choice. I've been having terrible side effects such as blurred vision, confusion, dizziness, and feeling faint.
any guidance or help would be appreciated. i be goin thru it
tldr: advice on massive life changes and med changes simultaneously

I'm not even sure what flair to assign this one ... maybe just putting this one out there for some solidarity and reassurance. The long and the short is -- I'm leaving my super flexible job as a freelancer to head back to FT work on Monday for the first time in 8 years. I have two kiddos and my youngest is starting Kindergarten this fall -- ergo I got both kids out of the house full time in September for the first time in 8 years.
I've been a freelancer for years -- (I teach business English online and do misc admin work) but things got scary with my hubby's company -- they got bought out and a consulting company came in (yes -- cue imagines of 'Office Space' in your head!). I saw the writing on the wall last December -- at least that some major downsizing might happen soon. What was always a sure thing with his job suddenly seemed more like a fragile thing and I simply couldn't deal with the risk of being without healthcare or losing a huge amount of income...just didn't feel responsible with our kiddos or some of the bills we currently have. The decision is incredibly bittersweet because the contractor I worked for was,to say the very least, phenomenal. Best place I've ever worked -- they all have been so supportive because they all get it too! The pay was a nice little buffer to the 'household budget' for years but with inflation/cost of things lately...it really wasn't sufficient anymore. Years of no vacation, constant cancellations to deal with sick babies...etc. -- just gets old and exhausting when you're the only one handling it. (To be clear - I handled it because I had the lower pay and most flexibility...)
Fast forward through a turbulent 5 months -- I did get a job. It took forever and was way more challenging than I anticipated, but I did it and I start on Monday! It's a government job and above all the benefits are solid (I mean...you can't get much better than NO benefits...but they really are quite good!) The job security is solid... and provides a nice balance to hubby's iffy position/company situation. (And of course, as all of this was happening 5 people did let go in his department -- luckily not him!) Above all, it's hybrid. After I get trained up, I'll be 2 days in office and 3 at home.
The only thing that gives me pause is the same thing that gives me pause every time I take on a big commitment like this-- the what ifs of childcare. My husband and I have literally been making childcare work since March 2020 when the pandemic started. My husband went 100% remote...until all of a sudden last month (you know, the month I finally got an interview after 4 months of applying) they suddenly want him in the office so much more. And they are threatening to track their logins... something they doubled down on recently.
The pandemic obliterated the daycare situation near me -- wait lists/no availability -- you name it. Summer programs last minute? Forget it. Grandma doesn't like to be 'on call' during the summer for regular babysitting (which is fine -- I respect that!) but I literally have a list of neighbors/friends to have on call at a short notice. I'm VERY thankful for the village that I do have -- don't get me wrong. I know so many moms who have less resources than I do.
But it is so terrifying to make this leap. I'm at the point where I HOPE we can toggle -- that my hubby can handle the kids when I'm in office and he can go in on the days I work from home. I'm VERY used to working with my children (again, pandemic hardened...LOL) and they are MOSTLY okay -- but of course this is a brand new job with a lot to learn so I have no idea how that will be in the beginning so I have to be cautious.
Phew -- if you made it that far, thanks for coming to my TED talk. Overall, I'm very excited but working FT for the first time ever with two kids after being freelance by choice for years to accommodate them...it's big. I also strongly suspect hubby underestimates how different it's gonna be -- but hey -- one challenge at a time :D I'm hopeful it will be a great experience.

Mixed TerrieChihuahua mix 9 Y/O Female Overall healthy, no other health issues
About five weeks ago, I found a little ball near my dogs anus on her right side so we had a vet appointment today and the vet said that she couldn't express the anal gland herself so that this would be the next best route. To my knowledge it hasn't abscessed or burst but it is blocked up. I started her on antibiotics and anti-inflammatories today and she will have the procedure done on Thursday under simple sedation. They also said she will have a little tube sitting out for a couple of days to drain but they are closed on Saturday and Sunday so I'm not sure when they will take it out. I hate putting my dog under just for any circumstance it gives me so much anxiety and she also has a full dental procedure next month in July so I'm worried about putting her under too much. I do obviously want the best for my pup though so I can stomach this if I have to. Is this the only way to make that go away?

I used to have a routine of running to a park near me and doing a short workout session - nothing crazy just some pushups, pullups, tricep dips, squats etc, and then running home. I've been thinking about starting this routine back up and bringing my dog along, since she's been starting to run with me. She loves that park - I could bring a ball or frisbee to toss once we get there, and there's a water fountain with a dog bowl there too!
I'm trying to figure out how to approach the actual working out part. My pup is not one to just be happy sniffing around and chilling while hooked up to a short lead nearby - she definitely needs clear expectations set. So I'm thinking we could have fun with it and both get a workout from it!
I'm thinking as a beginner exercise, I can work on sit/down stays with her while I do a set, and then I could have her run to grab a treat or do a trick in between before I ask her to do another stay.
If we come up with a good rhythm and build up our skills, it could be fun to teach her to do some pushups in sync with me (like sit to down back up to sit?) !
Does anyone have any experience working out with their dog? Do you have any routines or tricks or skills that have been engaging and fun for your dog? Anything cool you are working on learning together?

Hey there,
I'm JD and I am looking for an experienced and reliable artist to help with the creation of this project.
The project is a slice of life comedy about the existential dread of adulthood, surviving a toxic workplace and finding joy in the simple and the mundane. The story takes place in a metropolitan area and is set in the present or the very, very near future.
Key concepts that will be explored are mental wellness, stigmas and the Japanese concept of "honne and tatemae."
The project is in the "early-ish" stages of development, which I hope makes it feel more attractive, as well. Drafts of the first 5 chapters are finished and main characters are being established, but there is definitely room for more within this world. I lack any artistic skills, so designs of all characters and locations will be needed. I am open to feedback and ideas, as needed.
In terms of specifics, I am looking for:
someone that has experience drawing manga/manwha styled characters.
Someone experienced and interested in the comedy genre.
Someone reliable and interested in working together on a long-term project.
If I've piqued your interest and you hit some of the specifics I am looking for, or if you have any questions or need clarification, please reply to this with your portfolio and experience and/or shoot me a message through email:
[email protected]
Thanks!
Hope to chat with you soon!

Mixed TerrieChihuahua mix 9 Y/O Female Overall healthy, no other health issues
About five weeks ago, I found a little ball near my dogs anus on her right side so we had a vet appointment today and the vet said that she couldn't express the anal gland herself so that this would be the next best route. To my knowledge it hasn't abscessed or burst but it is blocked up. I started her on antibiotics and anti-inflammatories today and she will have the procedure done on Thursday under simple sedation. They also said she will have a little tube sitting out for a couple of days to drain but they are closed on Saturday and Sunday so I'm not sure when they will take it out. I hate putting my dog under just for any circumstance it gives me so much anxiety and she also has a full dental procedure next month in July so I'm worried about putting her under too much. I do obviously want the best for my pup though so I can stomach this if I have to. Is this the only way to make that go away?

My front left fender is completely shot and it needs replacing but some guy is selling fender from a convertible near me and I was wondering if it’ll fit or what kind of modification would I have to do to make it fit

I cannot afford an apartment & have no friends or family to rely on. I do have a reliable job that I don't want to quit and savings that I need for a place. Looking at motels around downriver, are still high for long term so I was considering sleeping in my car for a few weeks in order to save and go to work each day. I have heard Walmart or Sam's club if you talk to management but that won't work for very long. I thought about parking on a few side streets but I don't want people to see me sleeping and call the cops & same for businesses. I also need to consider gas & distance. Any ideas?

Recently I discovered the well known song “Like A Stone” by Audioslave. My mind was blown when listening to the song. I couldn’t wrap my head around how Chris sang so well and why it sounded so good. I then saw someone else on here post a cover recording of themselves singing it and they hit most of the notes but didn’t use mixed voice. I was in disbelief and almost considered giving up on singing. So I mentally broke down the song with the limited music theory I do have.
The song starts with a melody, that repeats itself twice then two more times with some alterations but the same pattern. Chris then begins singing in tune with this melody as it repeats again. He’s harmonizing with the rhythm of the melody but not really singing the melody very distinctly. He then proceeds to repeat the rhythm of the melody, but much louder with more power, this time the melody itself isn’t playing. It’s just Christ singing. Then the melody returns and he begins singing with it shortly after, harmonizing to the rhythm. Then something fantastic happens. At 1:58-2:16 (Audioslave - Like A Stone (Official Video) on YouTube) Chris begins REALLY harmonizing with the rhythm while this tune vocally producing the melody while singing the lyrics. It’s very distinct here, more so then every other time he sang it. This is then used to create a bunch of tension that hits hard and feels amazing.
I then practiced singing along to this song, with the same sort of pattern I hear Chris doing it and it felt amazing. I then sang the karaoke version with this in mind, and it was maybe one of the best songs I’ve ever sang. I feel like I’m really starting to grasp how to sing a melody with rhythm while maintaining tempo. I initially found singing to the melody of a song very intimidating and impossible. How am I supposed to remember entire melodies for songs and then sing them properly? Well, something clicked in my brain after doing the mental gymnastics of trying to understand how Chris sang Like A Stone. I then started singing other songs and LITERALLY INSTANTLY found myself capable of singing along with most melodies. It’s like all that memory has been stored in my brain, and now my brain has finally figured out how to use it.
TL,DR: Melody has always been a challenge for me. Then I did some mental gymnastics while listening to Like A Stone by Audioslave, practiced singing like Chris Cornell and then BAM now I find it easy to sing melodies. I’m still not the best at hitting all the right notes, but I can generally feel when I’m not hitting the right notes so there’s that.

(This has been on my mind for ages now; I need to get it out of my system.)
Okay, you're probably wondering why. Now, to give context, I met this friend during covid last year, doing virtual school. She sent out an email to me and we connected together after we shared our socials. Because of my parents, I was unable to go and see any of my friends for around 2 years, so this was a great thing - making new friends (which is pretty hard in virtual school), and I was pretty happy with her company. We would play games after school, virtually bake various things such as cookies at her house or cake at mine, mess around carelessly and do what I had been missing and more with her company. Now, it was going so well that because of my luck, I knew that I would flunk it, and the friendship wouldn't last. And, on a moment's notice, my one friend from virtual school left to go back inperson. This made me very sad (though that is an understatement). I was a good student, but ever since her absence, I was ignoring my assignments and not wanting to go to school. I filled my room with chip bags and other wrappers. I even started watching videos during class all day instead of doing work. I didn't care anymore, but I should have, and I regret it. Yes, during this time she did reach out to me, but since I was doing so poorly in school my parents took my phone and other ways of contact, so I couldn't reach her. This probably made her think I was ghosting her. That makes me feel as if I was the reason we stopped talking to each other. So, I held all the guilt, and I still do.
(I also went to Summer School (inperson). There I met a very nerdy new friend who was pretty nice.)
Then, the next year came. My parents finally put me back to inperson school, and I was meeting all of my friends again. I was sitting at their table and talking with them whenever we had the chance. It was all I had ever wanted, though I still felt self-conscious about myself. Suddenly, I realized the interactions weren't as frequent, nor impactful as I had made them out to be. In fact, they were mere fragments of small talk. This was because I lacked the social skills required to meet up with the standards of my peers. And with big shoes to fill, I felt miserable once more. Then, one day when I was talking to my best friend from before, she brought up a familiar name, one that I had not heard in what seemed like years: the virtual friend's name! I was very hyper inside when I heard that, but then also scared. What would she think of me? Then, nearly the next day she was at our table. Paging through her book, she sat there. She probably hadn't noticed me. I played it off as I hadn't noticed her. It's been around 4 months now. I reconnected with my friend from Summer School, and we started to talk. Coincidently, he was also friends with my virtual friend. Then, one day (today), he asked me about her. He first asked about if I knew her. Then, he said that she was talking about me (in a good way). I told him about all of this (though he didn't want to hear it), and he did nothing. So, I've been thinking about this all day, and I am confused.
Should I go and talk to her again? Maybe ask for her updated socials? Maybe check in? I'm not sure.
TL;DR: I met a friend during virtual and now that friend is a friend of my friend and sits at our table. I then was notified that she probably also misses me, but I'm too scared to confront her about it. What should I do?

I honestly have no idea what your deal is anymore. Something has changed in you or maybe me. We're not what we used to be anymore though. You were always so good to me and you made me feel complete. I've never been more broken than now, and it's because of you somehow. For four years my best friend has taunted me with the fact that she stole my baby to molest, dated every single person important to me while leaving me to linger in her unexplained death, and left me without the one thing I ever asked for. I don't get it because these aren't just stories. You magic, invisible hand truly fucked up everything I hold near and dear. I won't have the lake this summer, or ever again maybe. I don't have a brother anymore and maybe a dad. I lost my oldest friend and she's taking my kids for no reason. No one can talk about anything, so it'll never get better. It's like some kind virus infected the earth and you just happened to be patient zero. Now this evil thing has spread it's destruction over everything beautiful and there is only ugly anymore. I never got an answer about your death and honestly it's more likely you're dead than alive at this point. If this was your sister or caleb fucking with me I think you'd have stuck up for me. I think you'd have listened to me, and not just thrown me in the psych ward. It's been so long since we were friends that I don't know anymore. Maybe you're an abusive asshole now. I don't see a single reason you couldn't say goodbye. Anything but an unexplained death and a world that has conspired to keep me from getting any closure. I'm not drawing a line in the sand or anything. I'm just done myself, and you didn't even try to start with. You just threw me away Liz. That's so not cool and it makes all our memories and time worthless. I don't know how I'll ever forgive it at this point and I'm just out of hope. It makes no sense. How many friends do you have with a love true enough to share yourself with? I was so excited to hear your stories of might and magic. Like how the fuck did you build this beautiful thing? It's amazing and just like you. For every secret you reveal you keep 10 and I could have spent my entire life reading you as a friend. I'm not nearly as interesting, but you could at least rest easy knowing I'd never stab you in the back. Why waste that, you know? I worry about you so damn much. You built this beautiful thing, but you're having to destroy it because of me. It feels like it's because of all the hate and hurt you put out on this wire. I wish you would have just talked to me, instead of destroying something beautiful to conceal something ugly. Friends say sorry when they fuck up, and I'm your friend. I wanted to forgive whatever this wall is, so I'd never need to wander without you again. It ain't all bad. You showed me things I'm thankful for still. Our relationship will always be special to me and I'm certain I'll never connect to you or anyone else again like we did back then. It's a polaroid pulled too early and forever overexposed anymore. I don't think we could ever recapture that magic, but that's alright. It's worth loving for it was, and so are you. I'll always hate not knowing why it died before it's time though. I see you say shit like "I'm a 1000% gay", and it's not accurate at all. There's a reason I was crippled when you left and haven't found myself yet. You gathered so much information about me out of context. It feels like you forgot who I am and there'll always be a panic in my chest saying I lost the one that loved me best, by mistake. I was a good friend and deserved a single conversation so I might understand what this wall was. I've always felt it was a mistake, and now it feels like it'll always just be me and this feeling forever trying to forget how that feels. I love you true anyway, so I could have oppressed the pain if you had just confessed there was another you loved best. I'd have swallowed anything if it meant you didn't have to die. Now it's just all shit and I can't say why. Only that it's time for the true goodbye. I'll always love you and be here for you though. Take care of yourself so you stay as beautiful as I remember you being. I'll shake this off and do the same eventually. If I don't get courtney to give me back the kids in six months I'm fucking turning japanese. A mansion on the hill for free, amongst the best pow on the planet, and none of the assholes that brought me down